Step 1: Make a post. This post should be at least 300 words. You may also post multiple times adding up to 300 words or more.

Step 2: Click on the name of your post. See it? It's probably something like 'Re: The Story of John Doe', a large line of text above your post. This should have a hashtag and your post link at the end of it (see the bolded part here: <!-- l --><a class="postlink-local" href="http://omniverse-rpg.com/viewtopic.php?f=41&t=1114&p=7298">viewtopic.php?f=41&t=1114&p=7298</a><!-- l -->#p7298). Copy this entire URL.

Step 3: Post it in the active weekly gains topic. The date of your post should be within the date range, GMT. If you are submitting multiple posts that add up to 300, post all the links.

Step 4 (optional): If you have a Recognition bonus, please include in your post 'Recognition bonus: 175'. If you have an Ascendancy bonus, please post with 'Ascendancy bonus: 200'.

That's all you need to do! When the topic is updated, you will be given 150 OM. Obviously if you have a recognition or ascendancy bonus, this will be increased to 175 or 200.

New weekly gains topics go up every sunday at midnight (at the end of saturday and the dawn of sunday) GMT. The valid time begins on sunday at 0000 hours GMT and ends on saturday at 2359 GMT.

Character name: Neku Sakuraba

Character source: The World Ends With You

Character history: Pulling him from immediately after the end of the game, but before he comes back to life. Another Day is not canon.

Physical Description: (originals only)

Stats:
ATK: 3
DEF: 1
SPD: 2
TEC: 4

Starting Proficiencies: Melee Strength (1000), Ranged Proficiency (1000), Ranged Materialize Proficiency (600), Area Attack Proficiency (300)

Starting Powers: Basic Telekinesis (400)

Starting Moves:
Black Uranus (300): This move allows Neku to summon pillars of ice within the range of his Telekinesis. The pillars are 3 feet in diameter and 7 feet tall. Each pillar lasts for 2 seconds, after which time it fractures and melts. If a pillar is summoned under someone, an event prefaced by a half-second of chilling cold and bright blue light from the ground that the pillar will soon occupy, they are knocked skyward and injured. Neku can summon one pillar at a time, so he must wait 2 seconds between pillars.

Black Jupiter (300) (Requires Ranged Proficiency, Ranged Materialize Proficiency, Area Attack Proficiency.): Neku can call bolts of lightning from any direction, so long as the point of origin and the destination of the lightning are within range of his Telekinesis. Neku has to be able to see both points. The lightning travels in a straight line between the two selected points, shocking anything that crosses it. Neku can maintain the electricity if he concentrates, but this prevents him from using another psych.

Tin Pin Blade (300) (Requires Physical Strength.): Neku can manifest a 2-foot long blade of wind in his hand, which he can employ as a sword-like weapon.

I confirm that I have read and agreed to the Rules of Conduct. Yep. I read them. By the way, why can't I change my username?

Vivio blinked once, twice. Where was she? The last thing she remembered was walking to school she had still been down about her Nanoha-mama's disappearance. No one could find her, and if they couldn't find her soon, sooner or later she was going to have to be marked MIA. Vivio had to squint her eyes do to all of the Whiteness. She saw what looked like a fountain and walked towards it. She sat on the edge as her device Sacred Heart sat on her shoulder. Vivio smiled at the device and looked around. She noticed a couple of different gateways but thought nothing about it. "Just where am I? And where are you? Nanoha-mama?"

Character name: Vivio Takamachi

Character source: Mahou Shoujo Lyrical Nanoha

Character history: Post force Manga After Nanoha Disappeared.

Physical Description: (originals only)

Stats:
ATK: 3
DEF: 3
SPD: 2
TEC: 2

Starting Proficiencies: Physical Strength(1,000), Ranged(1,000), Area Shield(400), Area Attack(600)

Starting Powers: Burst Movement(800)

Starting Moves: Accel smash: An High speed Uppercut used by Vivio. Usually used as a counterattack just after Vivio blocks or dodges an opponents attack. She can also use it to knock Projectiles away if she hits at the right moment.(300 OM, Physical Strength Proficiency required.),

Sonic Shooter: A high speed shooting spell that Vivio uses. She can shoot a single bolt or Up to 30 with it's Variation: Sonic Shooter Assault shift. The Bolts appear all at once and fire. When moving around She can control the bolts to fire one after the other like a machine gun for suppressive fire and cover fire, as well as using them to repel other projectiles. It can drain quite a bit of her energy due to how powerful it is.(600 OM, Range Proficiency and Area Attack Proficiency required.),

Divine Buster: Vivio's Mother Nanoha Takamachi's most infamous attack. It consists of a large beam of energy launched from the caster That can inflict heavy damage. The spell itself can only be cast while stationary and requires manual aiming up until the beam is released. Vivio's version has a short charge time of 4-5 seconds and can be shot mid to close range.(300 OM, Range Proficiency and Area Attack Proficiency required)

I confirm that I have read and agreed to the Rules of Conduct.

What the fuck? Seriously, what the fuck?

As if that little son of a bitch hadn't been enough to shit on his day, now he was abducted. Where in the holy fuck was he? One second his platoon is running a breach on that piece of shit cargo ship, the next they're deep in the shit and he was...attacked? Violated, definitely. Whatever that little fucker had been all he knew was that it had almost choked him to death until his C.O. pried the bastard off and filled it with a hundred rounds of FMJ.

After that they were inspecting the ship, looking for any signs of survivors and what did they find? Not a single fucking crew member. Not even the fucking bodies. What did these assholes do? Eject themselves into space to escape whatever those fucking mutated spiders were? High cost for something you could torch or shoot.

But now it made sense. They had to be abducted, right? I mean, sure, why the fuck not? Here he was. No fucking way he would be the only taken. Unless of course the universe just liked giving overt “fuck yous” out to certain Marines. Hoo. Fucking. Rah. Now he knew why his old battle axe bitched about him becoming a scientist instead of picking up a rifle. Scientists don't go to abandoned cargo ships. Scientists don't get mutated spiders trying to eat your face and strangle you at the same time. Scientists (hopefully) didn't get abducted to great white rooms.

And that's when the fucking anxiety attack set in. What a fucking beautiful day this was going to be.

Wait. No fuck that. This was not an anxiety attack. Sure his chest would tighten and his throat would close and the room would spin. But this was...different. Something was wrong. Something was seriously fucking wrong...

“Shit! FUCK!” His cries were reduced to gibberish as he clutched his chest, fumbling and striving to rip his tactical vest off. “F-fucking p-pieceash-shit!” One clasp. Two. Get the fucking third one you stupid fucking fingers! All he could hear in his head was the repeated loop of “whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck” as pain ruptured his chest cavity. He was bursting with agony. Third clasp. He tore the vest off his body, didn't even care where he threw it. He rolled onto his back, gritting his teeth until he felt like either his teeth were going to crack or his jaw ripped through his face. A momentary gasp resulted in an airbrush spray of blood all over his face.

“Oh shit...” were the last comprehensible words he uttered as he ripped the buttons off his BDO. He thought he was going to have to find a way to get his under shirt off, but as he looked down to inspect himself, he found out something was already working on that.

A fucking bloody mess was what he stared at. The crack of his sternum alerted him that as much as he wanted to get away from the pain, something wanted to get away from him. The screaming started anew as audible breaks of his ribs emerged from within his body. His diaphragm impacted, leaving him utterly breathless, gasping and bleeding from the mouth. His lungs weren't just collapsed, they were fucking shredded and crushed. That meant every death rattle caused globule spurts of blood that pooled around his head. His eyes closed and opened slowly. His vision blurred almost to nothingess.

His last vague form of an idea as all oxygen ceased flowing to his brain had been “Wish I didn't fucking see that” as finally his chest burst open, a small pinkish-yellow head peering out before clawing its way through the rest of his chest and scurrying off.

I dunno if this is news to anyone or not, but for those of you who love games, Humble Bundle is an amazing place to find them for cheap, whether it's in their 'set your own price' bundles or for super discount in the Humble Store. They also do bundles for e-books and other neat stuff. Their Store is doing an end-of-summer sale, and they're even giving away games for free. Today/this week's game is Tropico 3 (it's a bit outdated but it was a fun and entertaining game).

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://www.humblebundle.com/">https://www.humblebundle.com/</a><!-- m -->

Plus everything goes to charity.

Sorry for the delay.

Contain below is the following: Some feedback for each of you and then both of you (I tried to include positive points and constructive points). I won't lie and say I am amazing at feedback, but I hope my opinion helps to either motivate your further or guide you in future development. After that I list the self-designed 'system' I used for 'grading' you guys. I used three categories, and I hope I explained in enough detail. The system was my own design.

After that is your scores and the winner.

----

Feedback

Gouki –

(Style) Fantastic use of martial arts-style combat. One of the better ways I’ve seen fights like this written.

(Grammar) Keep an eye on your use of commas. I also noticed that often it seems like you write massive sentences or extremely short ones. I noticed this in the second post, where you’d had a few lengthy sentences and then several that were very short. I saw what you were trying to do, but for my personal reading tastes, it was almost too jarring. Try to find a balance somewhere closer in the middle.

(Reader) Your dialogue was kind of cheesy, but it made me smile and grin instead of rolling my eyes.

Retane –

(Grammar) I know your situation with writing can often be erratic, but I think you’d be well-served to get Google Drive. It’s far better than Wordpad or Notepad and you can use it offline if you download the client. Drive is also pretty good at predicting when you meant to use one word and typed a similar one instead.

(Reader) – I enjoyed your tongue-in-cheek use of the term ‘street fighter’ to describe Gouki.

(Reader) – Whether you intended to or not, I actually felt sympathetic for Retane by the end of the fight. I don’t know if this was a side-effect of his mounting desperation or Gouki’s cold and calculated combat style.

(Reader) – The bit with your summoning seemed tacked on at the end and rushed.

Both –

(Reader) I am a personal fan of writing in a third-person limited style for fights. As a result, I will rarely write the other character’s name unless they state it. I liked how you both stuck to this (Gouki in the fight and Retane in the pre-fight).

(Reader) I enjoyed how Gouki read genuinely like how I would expect a tame Street Fighter battle to be converted into prose. I likewise enjoyed how Retane’s read with the sort of manic and often incoherent energy that I expected from the character.

---

Proto Man Score Sheet – When I was determining a winner, I took a few categories into mind. I will lay these out below for the sake of clarity.

Style – How does your writing read? Is it overly verbose or overly simplistic? Does it flow like a majestic river or is it choppy and erratic? ‘Style’ is how good I believe your writing is from the viewpoint of an editor or someone with an English degree.

You will be scored from a 1 (Very Poor) to a 10 (Stellar) for your ‘Style.’

Grammar – Do you have excessive errors in spelling or grammar? Are they subtle mistakes (using similar words that basic spell checkers won’t notice) or are they extreme? Furthermore, do these mistakes genuinely inhibit my experience as a reader?

You will be scored one of the follow for your Grammar: 1 (Needs Improvement) to 3 (Solid)

Reader – Did I enjoy your writing as a (subjective) reader? Or was I bored to death by your character’s actions and inner thoughts? This is the most subjective category, but for me, it’s the most important one. I can recognize that Death of a Salesman and The Adventures of Huck Finn are great books in terms of grammar and style, but they do nothing for me as a reader. I think they’re all lame and boring, and I had no emotional investment in the characters. On the other side of the spectrum, people love crap like Twilight and 50 Shades not because they are literacy exemplars but because they (for whatever reason) become wholly invested in the characters.

Your reader score is just that—an approximation of my overall experience reading about your character.

You will be scored from a 1 (Very Poor) to a 10 (Stellar) in the ‘Reader’ category.

Penalties – If you failed to post or failed to adhere to deadlines, that will be reflected here, rather than punishing you in all categories.

-----

End Result

Individual = (Style/Grammar/Reader/Penalties) = Final Score

Gouki = (8/3/9/0) = 19
Retane = (5/1/7/-1)= 12

Gouki = 46.4 OM
Retane = 22.11 OM

Gouki wins. He may choose to Spare Retane or to Kill Retane.

Gouki suffers 2 HP of damage.

If Retane dies, he will reincarnate at the Fountain in the Death Shroud, a state that will persist until he departs the Nexus.

Got this Azure Striker: Gunvolt off the Nintendo eshop, along with Mighty Gunvolt. The former plays a lot like Mega Man X and the latter like OG Mega Man. I highly suggest if you have a 3DS, you but it. 15 bucks for a solid game.

Lovin' it. Decent Zelda of challenge and it's definitely not just a Dynasty Warriors reskin, the light extra Zelda elements are cool and make for some decent boss battles. Gohma actually beat me the first time around (on normal difficulty) because he beat the base before I could kill him. Got down to 3 hearts against Argorok too, and that's with potions. Lovin' it. DON'T CARE THAT I SAID THAT ALREADY

Rand was thoroughly confused. One moment he was asleep in the Aiel Waste, the next a strange pure white figure in a black room was telling him he was interesting and that he was no longer in the world he came from but in a world called the Omniverse. Now he was in a place that could be any prairie in the in the world, his world which he was supposedly no longer in.

He instinctively entered the void and reached out for saidin, but he couldn't feel the sickening warmth it gave off. He tried again, but still couldn't feel the tainted male half of the One Power. Of all the Light forsaken things that could possibly happen! I'm stuck in an unknown place and I can't find the power, he thought bitterly. He had been travelling with...Light! Who had he been travelling? Mat Cauthon, one of his closest friends was one of them. The Aes Sedai Moiraine Damodred, the woman he had believed he would marry until recently Egwene al'Vere, Moiraine's warder Lan Mandragoran, and many Aiel. At least my memories are returning, he thought.

"Dammit Omni put me back where I belong! I have many prophecies to fulfill!" He yelled at the sky.

He then fell to his knees, "I'm the Dragon Reborn," he yelled miserably, "Take me back! The Dark One, The Forsaken they will destroy the world with out me! Light!"