Things you believed as a kid

[Gaston]

Hold on, are you telling me it's not just a balloon?

[Amaterasu]

Hold on, are you telling me it's not just a balloon?

Not the military-grade ones, at least. The civil ones that are smaller are different, I think, but in regards to the military blimps, if I understand correctly the balloon (which is covered with metal plates, also) has a metal structure inside which you can even walk on, and there are several tanks with helium gas attached to that structure which keep the blimp buoyant. To make it ascend or descend they have air tanks which are filled or emptied to make the balloon heavier or lighter, that's the same across most blimp models though.
So even if the metal plating gets pierced the blimp wouldn't go flying like a kid balloon that you let go of, but a couple of the metal tanks get hit and the blimp loses some of its buoyancy, not all of it. I'm no expert though.

[Weiss Schnee]

I thought that getting a job was something you pretty much automatically did, like as soon as you graduated people were bugging you to go work for them.


nopenopenopenope.

[Omni]

Hahaha, I think we all got knocked for six with that one. I think at some point in history it WAS more like that, though.

[Jim Raynor]

Yeah there was a big change between what 90's/early 00's kids were told and what happened when they became adults.

[Kirano Jr]

Instead of just most?

Also, not like the UK has much room to talk, Brexit.

Forgive us for wanting a positive change.


Anyway, I believed wrestling was real as a kid.

[Bobby Worthing]

Nobody explained clouds properly do me. I knew dark clouds were rain, but white ones I thought were steam coming from the sun.

I thought I could change the world. I wanted to get into politics and law so I could help people. Then I studied politics and law and discovered pretty quickly I wouldn't be changing diddly squat.

I thought all my problems would disappear when school was over and that I'd magically become happy. Lol, what a nub.

I thought hoverboards would be a thing by now. Actual, Marty-Mcfly hoverboards, not that shit we got instead,

I thought celebrities were all good people. They always seemed to be smiling in their pictures.

I thought if I digged for a really long time, it would technically be possible to reach the other side of the world.

I thought if I never bought sweets again, it would get my mum out of debt. Any time she offered, I'd say no. Dunno if she thought I was on a health kick or something, but heyoo.

[Omni]

point made, cell

[Dawnika Snow]

I used to think the sky was made of paint. Even after realizing what space was.

I believed in zombies, that lived underground.

My brother one time convinced me pokemon were real, but only he could see them. I beleived him when he pointed to bird and said "LOOK A PIDGEY."

[Arle Nadja]

I was never quite sure how babies were made. I suspected kissing, but I also thought babies grew in the stomach and therefore just kind of assumed they must be born from the butt. ...I was genuinely skeptical and offended when I learned the truth, and spent at least a year or so in hopeful denial.

I didn't think it was possible for girls to date other girls. Mind you, this is the same me who didn't understand babies and had no concept of boys beyond how they normally acted and how they looked with clothes on. The idea of dating another girl was so confusing for me that it took me until the age of 16 to open up to the idea. I'm gay. I blame the fact that I was never introduced to the concept in any form of media.

I didn't have a very strong seperation between fantasy and reality. I got very upset and cried when I couldn't find some characters I had gotten attached to in-game anymore.

For what feels like a year or two I thought I must be part boy because I was too short to be a girl. Then boys started hitting puberty and I was relieved. You know, because that would have been terrible. Now I'm just a dwarf. Much better.

[Mark]

A good few things I falsely believed could be pinned on my parents. Sometimes you just gotta lie to kids to make them stop doing stuff.

My parents taught us that eating more than one or two bananas in a day would make us sick. Apparently we liked bananas and a whole bunch would be gone overnight otherwise. There are probably other examples of this, but bananas really stick in my mind. They told us the same thing about chewable vitamins, though that is more understandable.

My parents also taught us "if you take medicine when you're not sick, you'll get sick". The general idea here is solid advice, but I interpreted that as you'll come down with whatever the medicine was supposed to treat. Like if I ate a cough drop I'd get a sore throat, etc.

[Amaterasu]

A good few things I falsely believed could be pinned on my parents. Sometimes you just gotta lie to kids to make them stop doing stuff.

My parents taught us that eating more than one or two bananas in a day would make us sick. Apparently we liked bananas and a whole bunch would be gone overnight otherwise. There are probably other examples of this, but bananas really stick in my mind. They told us the same thing about chewable vitamins, though that is more understandable.

My parents also taught  us "if you take medicine when you're not sick, you'll get sick". The general idea here is solid advice, but I interpreted that as you'll come down with whatever the medicine was supposed to treat. Like if I ate a cough drop I'd get a sore throat, etc.

Double negatives make a positive, maybe? I believed something similar as a kid, that medicine is poisonous unless you are sick with that exact sickness that it treats. I made up in my head that medicine is a poison against the virus that is in your system, but if there is no virus to attack it hurts your body instead.

[Omni]

My "religious awakening" went something like this:

My grandma was religious, and Christianity is so embedded in culture, that you just kind of accept it when you're a kid, you know? I was English, and English people are Christians. That's just how it is when you're a kid (though perhaps not anymore today). I went to a religious school, and they'd read from the bible, and I vividly remember my teacher stopping to tell us "And this is all real, this all -really happened-".

I told that to my mum, and she said the words that more parents need to tell their kids (in a religious context or not): "Well, that's just somebody's opinion. We don't really know the truth for sure."

And that's what kickstarted my philosophical beliefs, and my tendency to debate and question everything. Honestly, the best thing you can teach your kids is to think for themselves, and find the answer for themselves.

A bit serious for this topic, but related!

[Gaston]

I used to think that hot and cold were two different types of energy. I wondered what would happen if two beams of energy, one hot energy and one cold, hit eachother? For some reason, when I learned that hot and cold air together caused storms, I thought that hot energy and cold energy together made explosions. I was a stupid kid.

[Trixie]

I used to think that hot and cold were two different types of energy. I wondered what would happen if two beams of energy, one hot energy and one cold, hit eachother? For some reason, when I learned that hot and cold air together caused storms, I thought that hot energy and cold energy together made explosions. I was a stupid kid.

Well I mean you're only kind of wrong. Heat is a form of energy. This is why burns continue to damage skin even when the source of the damage is extinguished or cold is applied. The energy has already been released. It's pretty much the only injury where EMS will want you to have attempted some sort of aid before they arrive, because if you don't the burn ends up getting worse.

[Gaston]

It is energy, that's true. But my idea of how it worked was completely different: I thought all heat was called by invisible laser beams, the strength of which determined their visibility. This was my explanation for why areas of hot air seem to get blurry, and that laser beams in most media was just really intense "heat beams" that could be seen.

[Dr. McNinja]

Used to believe that my name meant fast car.

Turns out I was right.

[Trixie]

I thought blow jobs involved hair dryers and hair. In a salon. Not fellatio.

[Omni]

My science teacher gave me an explanation I've stuck to ever since, that Heat is energy and Cold is simply the LACK of energy. So when someone says "Close the window, you're letting the cold in", technically it's the opposite, the heat is leaving.

^Trixie I was confused even when someone told me what it meant, because the name continues to make no sense. Ah well.

[Gaston]

Oh yeah, I figured out myself that heat was the energy sometime in grade school. It was just before then that I had no fucking clue.