06-01-2018, 02:24 AM
Second one for the great and mighty Doctor Shantotto.
I read a decent portion of this thread, and boy was it a doozy, To trixie, cell and mr android mc robo man and mr all might, I commend you all on the level of writing you all displayed, it makes those of us who are looking to improve look to strive to your levels of writing prowess.
to start out im just gonna pick out some things that i like, because this thread has so few things I would change.
so first off I love the way every aspect of coruscant is portrayed all across the board, each character brings a different life to the place but the common descriptions always make me think im reading the old Star wars books. that is a good thing.
i feel like each character especially Trixie experiences very heavy physical and mental burdens.
In regards to the two DBZ characters. I enjoyed both of you and the conflict between you both was well written and i especially liked how 17's thoughts were portrayed, the sarcasm early on really helped me like him.
Cell, You fucking creeped me out, in a good way, its like you slithered into his mind and easily pulled each action out as if it came to you naturally.
and lastly All might, Ive never seen your writing before so i kinda had to go back over your posts. I feel like you went after the sort of jojo from Jojos bizzare adventure sort of vibe with him in here, its hard to explain.
But, my favorite part of this entire thread was the Gran Torino reference.
Great bonus to all and to all a good night
I read a decent portion of this thread, and boy was it a doozy, To trixie, cell and mr android mc robo man and mr all might, I commend you all on the level of writing you all displayed, it makes those of us who are looking to improve look to strive to your levels of writing prowess.
to start out im just gonna pick out some things that i like, because this thread has so few things I would change.
so first off I love the way every aspect of coruscant is portrayed all across the board, each character brings a different life to the place but the common descriptions always make me think im reading the old Star wars books. that is a good thing.
i feel like each character especially Trixie experiences very heavy physical and mental burdens.
In regards to the two DBZ characters. I enjoyed both of you and the conflict between you both was well written and i especially liked how 17's thoughts were portrayed, the sarcasm early on really helped me like him.
Cell, You fucking creeped me out, in a good way, its like you slithered into his mind and easily pulled each action out as if it came to you naturally.
and lastly All might, Ive never seen your writing before so i kinda had to go back over your posts. I feel like you went after the sort of jojo from Jojos bizzare adventure sort of vibe with him in here, its hard to explain.
But, my favorite part of this entire thread was the Gran Torino reference.
Great bonus to all and to all a good night