The usual people and unusual talks

[Guu]

Alphys was hit with a wall of pure disappointment at the boney hands of her old master. She looked towards Undyne for backup who gave her a scrunched up look that could only be translated as “Holy crap you weren’t kidding!”

But suddenly, the fish girl had a thought her head, which caused her to shoot the the doctor a question.

“Wait, how did you know my name?” She inquired.

“Oh, when you you’ve fallen through time and space, you have tendency of knowing everyone.” He explained before shooting Alphys another glare. “Or has my… protege failed to mention that fact?”

“She did explain that...” Undyne began to explain, but was interrupted.

“Ah, then she can do something right.”

Undyne was already on the verge to snap a skeleton’s neck for treating her love so poorly. But before she can take action, Alphys glanced over and shook her head, her eyes pleading her to stand down. The warrior instead sighed and then held back, gritting teeth and stabbing the hell out of her ice cream with her spoon.

Gaster pulled up a chair and rather methodically took a seat. It was now that the waitress noticed the table had gained another occupant. She quickly headed over placed a menu in front of him.

“I didn’t realize this was a party of four! Are you paying together or separate?”

Alphys looked over towards Gaster who only gave her the lazy man’s equivalent of a the look of eternal suffering and torment.

“To-together.” Stumbled Alphys.

“Any flavor you have in mind sir?” Asked the Waitress, “Or do you need time to look?”

“I want ice cream in the flavor of tormented souls.”

The table was silent. The group was in a combination between horrified and shock. However, the waitress seemed unperturbed.

“Would a substitute do just fine?”

“Wait, what?” Cried out Alphys.

“Yeah, I can’t sell the souls of people obviously, but we do a carry a substitute in case we have reformed soul eaters roaming into town. It’s a bit off-menu, but you’d be surprised how useful it is to keep a few cans around.” She explained. Her body goes into a lean as she reminisces. “In fact just last week, we came across a couple, nice people outside the fact they ate souls of course. I told them about the substitution option, claimed it tasted just like the real thing! Even promised to go cold turkey! Probably saved a few lives with that one. Oh yeah, not to mention it’s vegan friendly. apparently! I know a few vegans who order that all the-”

“Ummm, sorry, I wasn’t actually serious with my order.” Interjected Gaster.

A few patrons nearby sighed in relief, they honestly didn’t want to know what soul ice cream looked like. Though the entire conversation has left them visibly scarred.

“Oh!” Said the waitress, straightening herself out before putting pen to paper once again. “Alright! Then what would you like instead?”

The skeleton slowly pulled open the menu and scanned its contents.

“I’ll… have… the vanilla. That’ll be it.”

“Yes sir!” Said the waitress, jotting it down and leaving for the back room.

Gaster looked over the rest of the group, who, outside Sans’ ‘don’t give a crap’ attitude, have yet to figure out how they feel about the whole scenario.

“I am a fan of dark humor apparently.” Explained Gaster. “It is a good, laugh, don’t you think? Hahahaha.”

Alphy begins laughing uncomfortably alongside her master.

“Don’t laugh unless you mean it!” Snapped Gaster jabbing a boney finger at the doctor.

Alphys cowered under her master’s fury, Undyne was a mere seconds away from planting a spear into Gaster’s face. But suddenly, the dark skeleton withdraw his finger and laughed some more.

“Get it? I was kidding. Dark humor haha.”

The rest of the group reluctantly join in on the laughter, uncomfortably. Suddenly, the moogle besides Gaster spoke up.

“Hey um, I’m still here btw.” He said, reminding the group of his existence.
“Oh right!” Said Alphys, all the stress of talking to Gaster has made her forget the existence of the little one. “Would you like us to get you ice cream, too? You know, as thanks for helping our, um, relation.”

“Oh no, I’m fine in that front.” Replied the moogle. “But a chair would be nice.”

“I’ll get you one.” Stated Undyne, eager for an excuse to get up for a few seconds. She went to the table clear across the room to grab a seat before plopping it haphazardly behind the fluffy gentleman.

Moogle pulled up the seat and with a little leap, sat down.

“Thanks! My legs were getting tired!”