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To: Any skilled hackers
From: King Sombra
Subject: Gainful Employment
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I King Sombra the former monarch of the Crystal Empire have a job that requires the talents of hackers. The job is rather simple. I require the location of the HQ of "O-Harmony" and also the means to gain access to said HQ. I also require some material.... purged from their servers.
Posts: 65
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Joined: Nov 2015
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TO: King Sombra
From: sexyvamp@ovmail.com
Subject: RE: Gainful Employment
As much as I would like to inform you as to where the makers of oHarmony are, I must first ask why in the name of the Lord do you want to know?
Sorry if I seem irrational and confused, but it is an honest question, and the Good Book says that honesty is a grand virtue to have.
![[Image: sanssig.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/369919416432984079/371386052931485708/sanssig.png)
i may be all alone
but i'm here to tell ya honey
that i'm bad to the bone
B-B-B-Bad to the bone
New to the Omniverse? Need a question answered? Want a C&C of your work? Send a PM to me and I will assist you in any way I can!
Posts: 312
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From: King Sombra
To: Sexyvamp@ovmail.com
Subject: RE: RE: Gainful Employment
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I have requested that they cancel a date and remove all evidence of it from their website. As they have decided to not abide by my request, given that i despise the date they have chosen for me, namely Dead Pool, I've decided a more....personal touch is needed. In addition the information I need purged from their serves is all traces of my date with Dead Pool, preferably before the aforementioned party sees it. According to sources I will not name, he is a Psychopath who is also deranged. Due to that, I desire nothing to do with him.
- King Sombra
Posts: 65
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Joined: Nov 2015
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To: King Sombra
From: sexyvamp@ovmail.com
Subject: RE: RE: RE: Gainful Employment
Oh yeah! That's you! You were the guy on oHarmony.com! Or should I say "horse." You remind of that one mare that I had to- actually, wait, not gonna say anything else. It brings back some kinda awful memories.
Anyways, let me get this straight. You're saying you want to take down an entire website; an entire DATING website, to be more exact. Which, you know, is the place where probably millions of people go to to find some people to fuck. And I'm assuming that, once you take down the website, you'll take down the people who OWN the thing too, huh? All of this... because of a date you didn't like?
Color me impressed, but I've never seen a pettier horse in my life. Sounds like you REALLY need a good fucking to relieve the pent-up anger you probably have built in there.
(Don't tell this to my other date, but if need be, I can help you out with this. I can tell you my secret hideout, if need be. Conversion therapy is awesome, trust me.)
i may be all alone
but i'm here to tell ya honey
that i'm bad to the bone
B-B-B-Bad to the bone
New to the Omniverse? Need a question answered? Want a C&C of your work? Send a PM to me and I will assist you in any way I can!
Posts: 312
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Joined: Jul 2016
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0
To: sexyvamp@ovmail.com
From: King Sombra
Subject: Notice
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You're now on my list of bipeds I'm going to murder.
It is a growling list.
Posts: 65
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To: King Sombra
From: sexyvamp@ovmail.com
Subject: RE: Notice
Funny, because I don't actually use my two feet to walk all the time. It's just a thing for appearances sake, you know? My favorite time that isn't sexy time is to run around on all fours like I'm a wolf. Hunt down demons, you know what I'm saying?
But yeah, cool story, bruh. Wanting to kill people because you got shafted on a dating service? Man, I get shafted all the time! I've used this site for years; it ain't easy getting a date!
One time, I ended up having to date someone who sexually identified as a preying mantis and tried to cut my head off with a pair of hedge clippers. I had to, *cough*, convert them. I think the Lord would understand that I had to do what I did.
(Also, for the record, all of this makes me think that you actually are gay. And hey! I got no problem with it! I've met plenty of gay people in my life; some of them even thought they were straight until they saw me xD!)
i may be all alone
but i'm here to tell ya honey
that i'm bad to the bone
B-B-B-Bad to the bone
New to the Omniverse? Need a question answered? Want a C&C of your work? Send a PM to me and I will assist you in any way I can!
Posts: 312
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Joined: Jul 2016
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To: sexyvamp at ovmail.com
From: Omniverse Digital Postal Service
Subject: You've been blocked by King Sombra.
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This is an automated message that the individual known as "King Sombra" has blocked you on the Dataverse and will no longer communicate with you. Please take no offense, but he has also reported you for insulting him. As such, your message didn't get through.
- Omniverse Digital Postal Service
