I Kill For The Trees!

[Guu]

The next day, after seeing Gildarts off on his new adventure, Guu was spending the morning watching the dataverse, trying to work herself up to doing royal duties.

She was in the middle of watching leaked security footage from Coruscant, when she got an idea, one involving a pair of newbies to the kingdom. She just thought of the perfect mission for them to go on.

She scanned again the pile of letters she got while she was partying the day before, and found the one that smelt suspiciously of hemp.

Reading through it one last time, she knew it would be perfect.

Luckily for her, the two newbies were already planning to head up later that morning together anyways, at least that's what her sources told her. She wasn't used to things working out this perfectly. She anticipated an explosion out of pure cosmic balance cosidering how well this played out in her head.


Meanwhile, a certain bear and a certain fish were waking up for the morning...

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear woke up from his slumber. The freezer felt good. He felt good about today. He made new acquaintances, and was going to meet up with one of them later.

Ice Bear checked if his backpack is ready. He wanted to be prepared for many things: to write, draw, and fight. He decided to run to the store and get some snacks. He'd do that quickly before meeting up with Undyne.

Undyne was a fish lady. Now Ice Bear couldn't go to the Sty and Fry without feeling some guilt. Undyne seemed pretty chill overall, albiet she can get pumped when the need arises. And Alphys was awesome in her own right.

Ice Bear ran to the convenience store just outside of the Cavern Grotto. He went in and bought up a bunch of energy candy bars.

He bought a whole shelf of them. Ice Bear placed them all in his shopping basket. He then hoisted it up and placed it on the counter.

"Those have a special, 2 for 1g." the cashier said.

Ice Bear placed 10 coins on the counter. "Ice Bear is thrifty."

He purchased them, and put the bag in his backpack. He started out towards the centre of town. He wanted to meet up at the mansion. He hopes he'd run into Undyne there. He decided just in case she didn't know, he'd tweet out to her on OmniTwitter. Perhaps she had an account and could find out where he is.

Ice Bear found a bench just outside the mansion's exterior. He sat and saw the beautiful jungle that encircled the town centre. He felt a slight breeze as he tweeted out his message to Undyne.

[Undyne]

To call Undyne's and Alphys's shared bed a mess would have been an understatement: both bedsheets were on the ground at the bed's foot end, one of the pillows had somehow managed to end up on the table that was three meters away from the bed, Undyne was laying with her feet where the head end was, and Alphys, who was holding onto the remaining pillow, was sleeping with her head on the fish's leg and her tail hanging off the side.

Considering the usual results when they slept in the same bed, it had been a pretty quiet night. They must've been more tired than they thought...

Undyne was awoken by a ray of light that came in through the window and hit her face. What... oh! The sun, of course! She groaned as she sat up. That day-night cycle thing was something that she'd need to get used to here on the surface. Ah well. She reached out and shook Alphys awake, they gave each other a good morning smooch, then got things going for the day. Undyne called dibs on the shower because Alphys would take longer, and she wanted to get them breakfast. For a fish like her showers were pretty quick - the only thing needing washing was her hair, her scales washed very easily. Not to mention that the bath in the healing waters yesterday had washed off the grime and sweat from Coruscant already.

When she came back out five minutes later Alphys had already put the bed in order and was in the process of summoning a dress for the occasion of meeting the Princess. Looked like she had something fancy in mind, judging from the tissue that was appearing between her fingers. Undyne leant down and gave her a hug. "I'll be back in a bit, okay? Bathroom's open for you as soon as you need it."

"Mmhmm... until later", mumbled the drake, still focusing on the summoning. Undyne snagged the keys from the table and put on her jacket on the way out. Now let's see... Alphys was more of a vegetarian, but she had an appetite for fish. She broke into a light jog to shake off the remainder of her sleepyness and traversed the streets of Ambrosia, in search of somewhere to order at.

It soon became evident that this would be a little harder than presumed! What she had not taken into account was that the diverse population of Ambrosia, including animals whose meat was popular, meant that most shops avoided selling meat, some even fish as well. The vegetarian options were plentiful, so she'd find something for Alphys, but the few places that sold fish didn't offer takeaway.

"Excuse me?" she asked when she grew tired of looking around, and approached a brown loppy-eared rabbit who was navigating the streets. "I'm looking for somewhere that sells fish for takeaway, can you recommend any places?"

The rabbit looked very concerned - no big surprise, after all Undyne was a fish herself - but answered: "You could try the Sty and Fry, it's just around the corner. I believe that they let you take the food to-go." He pointed out the direction.

"Thanks!" She broke back into her jog and turned at the street corner indicated. There it was... mmm, and from the smell of it they were open already. When she walked in she was promptly greeted.

"Good morning!" spoke a pig girl that was waiting near the door. "Are you alone today, Miss?"

"Morning! Actually I'd like to order something to go. Is that possible?"

"Of course!" She then handed Undyne a menu off a stack. "All our items can be packed for you to take away. Our dish of the day is spicy gazpacho with chili peppers."

"Hmm..." She flipped through the pages, then looked up. "I'd like number 52, the vegetarian algae rice with lime noodles, and number 109, the double salmon burger with molten cheese, please. Both for takeaway, and could you mark the boxes? They're for two people."

The pig hesitated for a moment but then noted everything down. "That'll take about 15 minutes, would you like to sit down while you wait?"

"I'll come back in a bit, actually. I wanted to stretch my legs some." She left the diner again and stretched her arms high over her head whilst taking in the sights. By now the party was over and the stands and attractions were being taken down again. Jeremy was nowhere to be seen, for instance - probably working his other job, right? The bouncy mansion was still up, interestingly enough, and didn't look like it'd be taken down anytime soon either... when she turned around she caught a glimpse of a large white-furred individual's back, as they wandered through the crowd. Could that be the bear from yesterday? Well, they'd meet later anyway...

She wandered the streets for a little longer before going back to the diner. The pig lady was already waiting behind the counter, she handed everything over with a bright smile as she named the price. Undyne dug through her pockets and put the according amount of coins plus tip on the counter. "Thanks! I'll be sure to come back if the fish tastes good."

"The... fish?"

Undyne grinned, baring her rows of pointed teeth. "I'm a piranha, what can I say? Occasionally I just have an appetite for fish."

"Oh! I didn't realize."

"It's a touchy subject here in Ambrosia, isn't it?"

The pig lady smiled awkwardly. "Mostly regarding meat rather than fish, but yes. It gets awkward if you see someone else eating meat of the same species as you are."

"I can imagine. Although, I wouldn't blame anyone for eating piranha, we taste delicious!" She laughed.

"Haha! Well, thank you very much, and have a nice day!"

Soon after this Undyne was back in their apartment. Alphys was already all dressed up and looked quite hungry. "Here!" Undyne said as she put down the bag and took out the packed meals. "I hope that I picked the right thing. By the way, if we want to eat meat during our stay here things may get a little complicated..."

[Guu]

Guu kept her eyes close to twitter. She already saw that Ice Bear and Undyne were setting up to meet that morning. It was time.

She sat upon her throne, one several times bigger than her body. She still wore her pink vintage Gildarts jacket from the day before over her iconic pink dress and yellow scarf. She raised a noodle like arm in the air and called out.

"I'll be expecting guests! When the warrior Undyne and Ice Bear arrive, they shall be welcomed and brought to me."

A dozen or so Pokute bowed at her and ran off, but considering they were cleaning staff, they weren't of relevance to the situation.

"You don't need to shout, I'm right here." Said Sylvia, as she took a note on her clipboard. She took off to the front door, hoping to run into the guests of mention.

Guu simply sat, and waited.



"Ah, so meat isn't really all that common place here." Alphys said in between bites of her salmon sandwhich. "But the animal people here are thousands of years of evolution apart from their animal counterparts. It would be like a human being hesitant to eat a monkey. I guess it's an emotional thing."

"Wait, so those weren't monsters?" Said Undyne, aghast.

"No, not techinically. They are surface animals that evolved much like humans did."

"That's weird!" She said with a deep chortle. "So not even a hint of magic with them! They cook food like humans do?"

"Yeah, I-I guess..." Replied Alphys, immediately regretting answering without a follow up question.

"Awesome." She said as she imagined their meals being prepared by that pig in magical princess form, flipping burgers with laser spatulas while fighting off a horde of barbarians.

As Alphys finished her sandwich, she pulled out her phone with her clean hand.

"By the way, Ice Bear tweeted us. He wanted us to meet him in front of the palace for the big Princess meet up."

"Yeah! I spotted him while I was getting breakfast." She said as she finished up her own meal. "I guess it's best we shove off!"

Alphys nodded and went to get her purse which contained her jetpack and drones, and the couple took off out the door.


"So, you've met Princess Guu, right? What's she like?" Asked Undyne as they parted their way through the early morning crowds.

"Oh, well, she's very weird. She looks like a human child, but something is off about her, like it's just a disguise."

"A disguise?"

"Yeah, from what I've researched, she has complete control of her form." She said

As they walked, she lifted up her phone for the fish knight to see. It was a video of Guu getting her head chopped off by an executioner, only for her body to independently stand up, then for her head to grow spider legs and crawl back to the top of her neck.

"Woah! That was awesome!"

"That was before she became leader of this town. Back then, Ambrosia was lead by a bunch of evil humans that hated anything not human, but Guu chased them off, so the only humans left are the ones that welcome, well, our kind as kin."

Undyne could feel a great deal respect for this princess, even despite her choice of looking like a human.

"So is she actually a monster in disguise or something?"

"Don't know, no one has been able to determine her actual species. There's some rumor about her being elderich in origin, but that's mostly from people that fear her."

Before their conversation could continue, they arrived at the front gate, where a very familiar Ice Bear was waiting patiently for them.

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear saw Undyne approach with Alphys in tow. He stood up, firm and tall, raised his paw and waved at the approaching couple.

"Ice Bear welcomes you to the palace."

Undyne still had bits of fish in her teeth, but she grinned tall. "Hey, it's Ice Bear!"

Ice Bear grinned. "Ice Bear knows." He then turned to Alphys. "You look lovely. Ice Bear approves."

"Hey, she's mine." Undyne said, in a defensive posture.

"Ice Bear knows. Just complementing." The weary bear didn't want any trouble.

"O... oh!" Undyne said. "Well, thank you." She got a bit uppity there.

Alphys spoke up "Thank you Ice Bear!" She then blushed at his complement.

Ice Bear walked up to the gate. "Ice Bear sat out here for centuries."

The guards moved, as Guu was expecting them. Ice Bear motioned for Alphys and Undyne to walk with Ice Bear.

"They're with Ice Bear. Official business." Ice Bear said, walking briskly past the guards, with Alphys and Undyne walking behind.

"I know we're a tad late, sorry about that. We had to eat something." Undyne spoke.

"We ate fish." Alphys said. "For breakfast."

Ice Bear looked at them with his dark, beady eyes. They slowly got bigger as he realized how ironic it was for a fish to eat other fish...

"Ice Bear isn't judging you... but fish eating fish... weird."

Undyne leaned into Ice Bear "They serve not much meat around here... that's what's really weird!"

Ice Bear shrugged his shoulders.

Alphys spoke to Undyne inquiring about the video seen earlier. "Oh! Ice Bear, have you seen this video of Guu?"

Ice Bear blinked. "What video?"

"Of her being executed during the revolution. Here, watch!" Alphys took her device and handed it to Ice Bear. Ice Bear watched as he saw Guu's head come off and sprout legs, in a bloodless, clean manner.

Ice Bear had seen some bent shit in his life, but this took the cake.

"Ice Bear feels nervous." He said, with his eyes staring for miles, like he had just seen a ghost.

Undyne spoke up, vouching for Guu. "Hey, I think it's badass! Like she survived a brutal execution and caused trauma to those who tried to kill her. That's... friggin' awesome!"

Ice Bear shook out of his own personal trauma. He knew Guu had weird properties... this was to be expected.

"Ice Bear guesses so... but what is she then?"

Alphys spoke up "Well I guess she's... our... benevolent leader, I suppose?"

Ice Bear shrugged his shoulders... it would certainly be on his mind for a while. Guu and Ice Bear had met once, and he did research by watching documentaries on Ambrosia, but this never came up. Ice Bear had trouble fathoming what Guu is. It didn't make sense.

Then again, in this brave new universe, not alot made sense yet. He'd have to come to terms with it sooner or later, that alot of what he learned was going to be re-written logically, scientifically, and so on.

The trio kept walking. Eventually a swarm of Pokute went by, cleaning the walls.

Ice Bear blinked. "Cleaning staff?"

Alphys and Undyne shrugged. They were just as confused as he was. They kept following the signs for Guu's throne room but the palace seemed bigger than it looked from the outside.

Eventually they came to the throne room's waiting area. There were benches to sit at. The three sat down on one long one, facing the throne room.

"So now we wait for them to come get us?" Alphys asked.

"Yep." Undyne said. "Play the waiting game."

Ice Bear reached in his backpack. He offered them a candy bar. "Ice Bear came prepared."

Undyne shook her head no. Alphys as well. Ice Bear decided to eat the candy bar while he waited.

[Undyne]

Undyne's head spun with thoughts as she waited, she felt oddly nervous about this all out of a sudden. The only monarch she had met before was King Asgore, and he was a completely different story. He was, well... he was Asgore. She'd known him since before she even knew how to walk and fight. He was a big fuzzball, always friendly, and she'd never known him otherwise. Now, she realized, she was going to meet another royalty, and this one looked like a young girl, no less. A girl with superpowers from what Alphys had shown her. Maybe she had already saved the Omniverse, or was just in her quest to do so?

"Hey, Undyne... are you okay?" Alphys's words dragged her out of her thoughts.

"Eh? Oh, no thanks, I'm full."

"... right." She was twiddling her thumbs too, looking a bit nervous herself. After a moment Undyne reached out and intertwined her fingers with hers, giving it a little squeeze.

"I think I worry too much. If we go by how Sylvia, Molly and the others were, Guu should be just fine."

A few moments later the doors opened and Sylvia stood at the entrance. "Guu would like to see you three now."

They walked through the hall and Undyne dropped to her knee before the throne, with her head down and her arm resting on her knee. Alphys bowed respectfully, and Ice Bear just remained standing.

"Ice Bear, hi. Please wait just a second, I want to greet my guests... I was expecting you already... Undyne and Alphys, was it?" Guu asked.

Alphys, who was looking at Guu, "Ehm"- and "Uhm"-ed a few times, so Undyne just took the lead. "That is correct, Your Highness." No doubt did Guu have a network of spies all across Ambrosia and probably even further to keep her updated on these things.

"I have something to offer to you three, but first of - why are you two here in Ambrosia?"

Undyne looked up, at Alphys. According to human customs most people weren't supposed to look at the regent even when speaking, so when she addressed Guu again she looked at the short staircase to the throne. "Well, I was told that-"

A squishy thing pressing against her forehead made her look up. Guu's arm was stretched out like rubber and pushed her head back so that she had to look at her. "I'm up here. Can't hear you if you talk to the ground."

"Sorry..." She cleared her throat. "I can only speak for myself, though. I was told that Ambrosia is a safe haven for non-human beings of all sorts, especially monsters. I hoped to find my friends here... although now, I have more reasons."

"Which are?"

"Ambrosia is a magnificient place, one that I would be happy to serve. I will keep looking for my liege, King Asgore, but at least until then I would like to offer my services as a knight to you." She paused a moment. "I... realize that this is very sudden, but I had no occasion to present my offer before that."

Guu's face remained unreadable. She looked bored, apathetic almost, and barely blinked. "A knight?" she asked eventually.

"Isn't that what humans call the warriors among them that wear heavy armor and wield giant swords in the name of their king or queen, and follow a strict code of honor?"

"..." Guu remained silent again for a little while. She looked at Ice Bear and at Alphys, who both nodded approvingly. She then nodded too. "I guess. I think I just need a sword for this or something?"

"Oh! Allow me to..." She put her hands on the ground and summoned Taitan, then conjured her armor so that she could grasp the blade with her gloves without risk of injury. The blade was so massive that she barely had to reach out to hold the handle out to Guu, when she held it by the tip. Guu took the weapon with both hands and lifted it up, then brought it down on Undyne's shoulder.

"Undyne, you're a knight of Ambrosia now, do me proud, protect our citizens and so on... that do the trick?"

Undyne blinked with surprise. Normally this had a whole ceremony around it, even if it was as rushed as now, didn't it? Guu took her silence as agreement and put the sword back on the ground before her, all without ever lifting her backside from the throne. "What about you, Alphys?"

"I, uh, I actually came here because Undyne is here."

When Guu remained silent, apparently waiting for a more thorough explanation, Molly spoke up: "She went through oHarmony. They tracked Undyne down for her."

"Cadence again? Good for you two. You plan on staying in Ambrosia then?"

Alphys shrugged nervously. "I still have my job with the Avengers. I'll be working for them while Undyne is busy, but when she comes back I will too."

"Well, you know that you'll always be welcome here. In any case, while you're here I have something else to talk to you about..."

[Guu]

She wrapped her arms around her back, as if she were Patton or something.

“Your mission, if you choose to accept it is to accompany me to aid the elves.”

“What’s an elf?” Asked Undyne.

“Uh… it’s like a species that almost look human except they have long pointy ears, glowing eyes, and purple skin. They also love trees and stuff.

“But anyways! The elves are one of our most prominent neighbors in the Tangled Green, despite this we’ve never interacted with them diplomatically before. Suddenly, they want our help on something involving an evil tree, and I’ve selected the knight Undyne and the ice bear Ice Bear to accompany me on what will most likely be a dangerous mission.

“Accomplishing their mission will give us an in with the Elves, so it’ll be imperative that we succeed at… whatever it is, the letter I got was kind of vague, hence why we will be heading to their capital first so they could explain it.

“If you two accept, arrive here at sixteen hundred hours with anything that might aid you on the mission. The letter did mention something about a fire so… yeah, make of that as you will. I’ll have a guide that will take us there, so don’t worry about bringing navigation equipment.

“Well, I hope to see you two here soon. That is all.”

With that, Guu literally melted into a pile of goop and sank into a drainage duct, out of sight, leaving the three dumbfounded.

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear headed home after being told the mission. He was determined to do this quest. It was the first major outing of his since dropping off Rina's package, and this was going to be potentially much bigger than that. He must pack and make haste when the appointed hour arrived.

He packed a fire extinguisher into his bag, and strapped his axe to it, and still had room left over. He did a few tests. First he made sure he could get to the fire extinguisher to and from his backpack. It was hard at first, but eventually he got a working motion on getting the fire extinguisher. He then did the same with his fire axe. He lifted his fridge up and down too... getting a good workout.

He tried his acrobatics. He needed to be make sure he was in tip-top shape for the quest.

Ice Bear summoned a pocket fan. He figured he'd need it for the trip. He plugged it into the outlet to charge.

He was admittedly shaken at the fact Guu was a creepy... whatever she was. Alphys showing him that video was definitely traumatic. Still, he must realize that there was more to people than meets the eye, and people seemed to love Guu despite her crazy appearances and forms. He shouldn't judge her based on that alone. That'd be very rude.

Grabbing the pocket fan, he stepped outside, went across the street to the bear couple's home. He knocked on the door. Dan answered.

"Hey bro, what's up?"

Ice Bear waved. "Ice Bear will be going on quest. Please watch Ice Bear house."

Dan looked at Ice Bear's cave. "Sure thing! Whatcha doing on this quest?"

Ice Bear shrugged. "Ice Bear cannot tell. Ice Bear will emerge victorious. Happy and glorious." he said, holding his arms up. "Ice Bear will be leaving now. Say hi to Bob for Ice Bear."

Ice Bear trekked back to the palace, sitting on the usual resting place outside. He sat and waited as it turned evening. He decided to catch up on world events on his Dataverse device.

"Now the weather across The Tangled Greens..." the meteorologist said as Ice Bear waited for the others.

[Sans]

He couldn’t remember how long he had been living in Ambrosia, if you could call hanging out in bars and sleeping in dumpsters “living.” Hell, if he was honest with himself, his life hadn’t actually changed all that much for what felt like years but was probably just a couple of days.

But as he walked out of the Candy Emporium for the third time that day, sipping a glass full of reddened, bubbling soda, he couldn’t help but soak in the ketchup-flavored taste of his drink. As he stepped into the sunlight, he had to stop to let the warmth cover him like a blanket. He wanted to shimmy to the beat of the disco music he had left behind inside the Emporium.

He strolled through the crowd with no real destination in mind. Dozens of animals, reptiles, birds, and creatures that he couldn’t recognize walked by him. They talked to each other, commenting on the birthday yesterday, of the queen, of the sunny weather, of anything that came into their minds. He heard laughter. His smile widened. He couldn’t remember finding laughter so addictive, so enthralling. He giggled to himself. He drew odd glances from the crowd as he stumbled his way through, his balance lopsided. He took another sip of his ketchup-flavored soda, holding back a burp. He didn’t remember drinking being this much fun.

He hiccuped. The high-pitched, pig squeal of a noise that resulted from the hiccup only made him laugh harder. The logical half of his brain stored the experience for later as a list of reasons to ignore his hedonistic side that wanted him to get smashed.

That was when he saw the Polar Bear.

Popping out of the crowd, he took a seat right next to a lamppost across the street from where Ice Bear sat, its head buried in its cellular device. It carried a massive bag on its back, presumably for some sort of adventure. He glanced up to the gigantic pink palace that reached up to the skyline.

hmmmm… a mission for the queen...

His eyes widened. Even in his inebriated state, he was able to connect the dots. This polar bear was the way to the queen.

This bear was the way to Papyrus.

He stood up, drink in hand, and trudged towards Ice Bear. The bear’s eyes flicked upwards upon hearing the skeleton’s constant hiccups, burps, and giggles. As Sans approached, the bear just stared at him with a vacant expression.

It was Sans who spoke first. He tripped over the curb, landing with a thud right in front of the bear.

“ow…” he slurred, rolling onto his back. “man, trippin’ suuuuuuuuccckkkss. but ya know, ya just gotta… grin and bear it, ya know what i’m sayin’?”

“Ice Bear doesn’t know what you’re saying.”

The skeleton nodded. “me too, ice bear,” he said, drinking his soda, “me too…”

“so…” he said, glancing up at Ice Bear, “you with the queen?”

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear couldn't help but notice how drunk the skeleton was... how a skeleton was drunk... so many questions, and Ice Bear had no answers for any of them.

The queen... he must be referring to Guu.

"Ice Bear is with Princess Guu, yes." Ice Bear said, offering the skeleton an energy bar from his pack. The drunken skeleton didn't see it, so he put it back in the pack.

"heh, princess... queen... same difference, eh?" Sans said, still tipsy to the highest calibur.

Ice Bear wasn't sure if anything he'd tell the skeleton would stick, but he was gonna give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Ice Bear is going on a mission with Guu. Undyne is presumed to be joining. You want in, Ice Bear presumes."

Sans gleefully and drunkely said "yes. my name is sans, by the by... looking for my dear brother papyrus. could you help a bro... i got skills, man. i hope undyne doesn't mind at all."

Ice Bear was reluctant. It'd be up to Guu to decide. He'd put a good word in with Guu, but Sans had to sober up a bit.

"Ice Bear will put in good word, but you must sober up. Deal?"

Ice Bear extended his paw out. Sans extended his hand out.

"i'll try but i can't make any guarantees. i guess you'll have to bear with me a bit."

Ice Bear blinked, not noticing the wordplay initially. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks.

"Ice Bear got your pun." Ice Bear then shook the skeleton's hand, it felt wierd but he tried to make it a firm handshake all the same.

Ice Bear moved over so Sans could sit down. "Ice Bear will share seat with you until Undyne arrives. Hope you like documentaries and ice skating." The tall polar bear went back to watching his streams.

[Sans]

The drunken skeleton plopped down right next to the polar bear, empty glass in hand. He continued trying to drink from it despite the fact that it was completely empty. He rested his head against Ice Bear’s side, his white fur soft and cuddleable. His eyelids drooped for a moment as the urge to sleep briefly overwhelmed his senses. As he proceeded to doze off, however, the flashing movement on the phone’s screen caught his attention. It was a stream of some humans ice-skating down a mountain with a posh, british-accented commentator in the background. It was calming yet enthralling at the same time, and helped to further relax his churning stomach and the encroaching headache in his head.

The human in the lead zipped down the hill at a speed that surprised even the inebriated comedian, leaving the rest of his competitors in the clouds of snow he left behind. He zoomed towards a wooden ramp a dozen or so feet ahead of him. He squatted down, readying his knees. He twisted his body as he flew into the air, flipping it as he smiled for the camera’s watching him. He adjusted himself to land on his feet as he plummeted back down.

When he landed, however, his knees buckled. What should have been a graceful landing meant for the history books became an absolute mess as the ice-skater tumbled and rolled down the hill, the competition surging past him, laughing at his misfortune.

“does… this happen a lot in ice-skating?” asked Sans, now not quite certain if he enjoyed ice-skating anymore.

“Ice Bear isn’t sure, but Ice Bear hopes that the human is okay.”

He didn’t know what possessed him to say it, but as Ice Bear finished his sentence, he slurred out a response.

“fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccccccck the humannnnnssssss….”

It wasn’t loud, but judging from the number of people that glanced in his general direction, the volume was enough to garner him some attention. Ice Bear himself stared down at him, eyes widened in shock.

“...Ice Bear thinks that’s racist.”

“oh, come oooooooon, iiiiice….” he said, giggling and tapping Ice bear in the side with his fists, “i’m just jokin’. jokes never hurt anyone. just jokes, hehehe.”

He was really bad at this “sobering up” thing. It was just that the ice-skating stream was so soothing and Ice Bear’s fur was so soft that it made him drool and want to fall asleep and forget the world existed for just a little longer. Old habits died hard.

“Ice Bear is curious,” said Ice Bear, changing the subject, “how is your brother Papyrus?”

Papyrus…

It hurt to think, but just the word was all it took to get his brain rolling and the adrenaline pumping.

“he’s…” he said, managing to sound somewhat coherent, “he’s the best brother anyone can have. He’s… he’s amazin’. way better than me. he never lets anyone get him down, like… water off of… water. He was so psyched about joinin’ the royal guard back home that he wore a battle body in the shower and stayed up all night to train with undyne.”

He laughed a good, hearty laugh. “i read him bedtime stories at night to help him sleep… he pays rent… gets me up in the mornin’...”

“I just…. I wonder where he is…”

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear looked at Sans. "Your brother sounds cool. Ice Bear has two brothers himself. Panda and Grizz. Ice Bear misses them dearly."

The polar bear paused the stream they were watching.

"two brothers? i bet it gets messy around the house." the skeleton joked.

"Not when Ice Bear's around. It smells like clean babies by the time Ice Bear is done." Ice Bear stated, reminiscing dearly about how he was always the one cleaning up the house, doing chores and errands. It was how he felt he could earn his keep... that's how it was with Yuri, so he assumed that role when Ice Bear met up with Grizz and Panda once he entered America.

"Ice Bear hopes they aren't too astray." He got a bit teary eyed.

Sans turned to him. "hey, i bet they miss you too. you are a pretty chill dude, your brothers would see this and miss you being around... someday you might meet them again. that's what i hope with papyrus."

Ice Bear blinked. "Ha. Chill. Ice Bear gets it."

Sans hugged Ice Bear's right paw. "so comfortable... reminds me of snowdin."

Ice Bear blushed as the skeleton hugged his arm.

"Ice Bear will see them again... someway somehow. If you help Ice Bear, Ice Bear will help you."

Sans looked up at Ice Bear. "heh, okay dude."

Ice Bear reached into his backpack. "Ice Bear offers you food." he said, handing over a candy bar to Sans.

"eh, sure." Sans said, taking the candy bar. He unwrapped it and started eating it. It would help him sober up a bit, off-setting the alcohol in whatever his digestive tract was.

"Ice Bear has one question. How does a skeleton get drunk?"

Sans quipped back. "heh, how does a polar bear learn to talk?"

Ice Bear blinked. "Touche."

The two went back to watching the skating events on the data device. They saw another accident.

"Humans aren't all bad Sans... there was one back home. Her name is Chloe. Nice girl. Good heart. Ice Bear also met a girl named Rina over in a nearby village."

Sans kicked back. "eh, if you say so."

Ice Bear decided not to press the issue further. He knew from Undyne and Sans that there was some friction with 'monsters' and 'humans'. However Ice Bear knew many humans who were good. Yuri being one of them. Yuri saved Ice Bear from poachers as a cub. He knew he'd have to show an example of how humans are good. That was neither here or there.

The skeleton and the polar bear stared in amazement when a human did a somersault move and didn't fudge it up.

"impressive, eh?" The skeleton quipped.

"Ice Bear knows."

[Sans]

They continued to watch ice-skating. Evidently, it was the championship, judging by the amount of people watching the stream and just how excited the announcer was even with his pompous voice disturbing the enjoyment of the serene nature of the sport. About six of the eight skaters had been knocked out of the fight due to injuries involving the tricks ring, leaving only two left for a race to the bottom of the largest mountain in the Fields. Whether they were the best of the best or were just the luckiest of the bunch, the last round would determine who returned home with a trophy and all the glory one could ask for from an ice-skating tournament.

As the two remaining contestants zoomed down the snow-covered summit, the skeleton glanced back up towards the Ice Bear. The chocolate candy bar had done a good amount to remove the alcohol in his system- he was glad that Ice Bear didn’t press the issue of drinking any further, as he honestly didn’t know himself. Biology was never his strongest suit.- and had the advantage of being particularly delicious. His migraine and his dizziness was dissipating, and his stomach no longer felt like it was on a teacup ride at an amusement park. With his head clear, though, he was a lot more aware of what he had said beforehand, and how uncomfortable it might have made the bear feel. It was better to just be honest and share his side than let it hang like a bad fart.

“ya know…” he said, breaking the silence, “i was just kiddin’ when i said ‘fuck the humans,’ right? i wasn’t tryin’ to… be racist or whatever…”

“Ice Bear understands. You say things you don’t mean when you are drunk.”

“yeah…” he replied, nibbling his chocolate bar as he pondered what to say next.

Ice Bear broke the silence this time. “Ice Bear once met someone Ice Bear didn’t like. Ice Bear met a Sasquatch named Charlie.”

“sasquatch?” He had to hold back laughter. “those things are real? they weren’t even a thing back in the underground.”

Ice Bear nodded. “Ice Bear didn’t like Charlie at first. But Ice Bear got to know him more. Charlie wasn’t so bad afterwards.”

The polar bear sighed. “Ice Bear made the mistake of assuming the worst. Ice Bear almost lost a friend because of it.”

His smile disappeared for a brief moment. He looked away from Ice Bear, finding his chocolate bar to be very interesting. He gave it a light, cautious chomp. It didn’t do much to ease the growing cramps in his stomach. Ice Bear’s words echoed inside his head.

Had he been assuming the worst about Frisk the whole time? Had he been seeing signs where none existed? Symptoms of a disease that was never there to begin with?

He couldn’t find a conclusive answer.

“Are you okay?” Ice Bear asked, leaning over to look at him. “You seem troubled.”

When had it gotten so easy to read him? First Frisk, then some polar bear he had only just met. Sooner or later, Undyne and everyone else was going to realize something was off with him and start asking questions he wasn’t sure he could answer honestly.

Sans sighed. “i’ve just been thinking… about the underground, i mean.”

“The Underground?”

“my home. undyne’s home. papy’s home. every monster that’s ever been born’s home.” He took a bite off of his chocolate bar before adding “the home we never wanted.” in a bitter tone.

“Ice Bear is confused.” said Ice Bear.

“i’ll give ya the rundown, so bear with me here, hehe. basically, humans thought we were gonna hurt them or somethin’, and decided to go to war with us. they kicked our collective magical butts and forced us underneath the surface of the earth and locked us in with a magical barrier.”

He shrugged. “and that’s how we’ve been living for god knows how long. trapped in darkness, with no one who knows us caring about coming to save us… if it wasn’t for our king promising to break us out, the entire kingdom would have gone up in smoke. and me?”

He finished off the last of his candy bar. “I’m just some lazy skeleton caught in the middle of it all.”

His smile widened far more than should be considered natural for a smile. “but enough about me and my unbearable backstory. what about you, ya nice bear?”

[Ice Bear]

"Ice Bear was raised by a human named Yuri. Good man, a bit like Ice Bear. Didn't talk much. Made me earn my keep around the place. He saved Ice Bear from poachers... he didn't have to. Mad respect for him, keep real. One day the same poachers got me cornered, so he chopped off the piece of ice... Ice Bear floated down the Northwest Passage. Ice Bear never saw Yuri again."

Sans grinned a bit "so i guess it was the polar opposite of my experience then."

Ice Bear looked a bit sad. "Ice Bear knows your experiences with humans... in your world, Ice Bear understands your reluctance to accept humans. However, this isn't your world or Ice Bear's world... it's different. Surely you must know of one human who is a good soul, who you can respect, keep real with."

Sans had to take pause and realize Ice Bear made a valid point.

"Ice Bear knows humans that can be monsters. Like those who poached Ice Bear's kind... for skin and fur. Believe it or not, humans took notice and made it illegal to hunt and trade polar bear skin in most cases... they allow it for indiginous folk... but only in limited quantities. Humans where Ice Bear come from are mainly indifferent to Ice Bear... but Ice Bear's family manages. Plus brothers and Ice Bear made a good friend in a girl named Chloe."

Sans looked up at Ice Bear.

"A girl named Chloe?"

Ice Bear nodded, sage as ever.

"Gee, you know alot of good humans."

Ice Bear nodded again.

"We lived in San Francisco, in a cave... just trying to make it in a human world. We did a fairly good job. Ice Bear knows how to cook. Sometime Ice Bear should introduce you to culinary magic."

Sans grinned. "You are something else. I can't even make a pun about that." The skeleton started to sober up. "Sometime I will take you up on your offer."

[Undyne]

Undyne and Alphys were both reluctant to leave each other so soon after having been reunited, but they agreed that there was no other way: Alphys would not have much to do on the quest with Guu and Ice Bear, especially since fighting was not her forte and fights were to be expected, and Undyne would not be of use with the Avengers. All that sciency stuff was Alphys's thing, not hers. Besides it would make a horrible impression if she refused the first mission assigned to her by her liege so soon after being knighted, especially if she was going to accompany Guu. She doubted not that the princess could protect herself easily from most attackers and, no questions asked here, she was stronger than Undyne, but a powerful ruler like her had powerful enemies. It could not hurt to have an equally powerful knight as backup.

"I'll be sure to call you or leave a message when I'm able, okay?" said Undyne while hugging Alphys in their hotel room. "I already joined OmniTwitter, and I'll be sure to post updates as StrongFish91. So long as they don't compromise our mission of course."

"Yeah. Just remember the time dilation. And stay safe, okay? I'd hate to hear that you got brought to near death again."

"Heh, don't worry. I was caught... won't let it happen a second time. Besides, even if I die I come back, don't I? Being a Prime and all that... not that I'll let anyone run me through easily, though. And you, be sure to do whatever it is you do with the Avengers, okay? Don't worry about me and focus on your work."

"Of course. They're great people, I... I'd never let them down."

Undyne blinked and hit her forehead. "I almost forgot! I got something for you." She ran over to the nightstand and produced a wrapped gift from the drawer. It was the size of a small book and relatively light. "I made this last night. Hope I'm not giving you a duplicate though."

"Eh? A-a-a-a-a gift?" Alphys stuttered but took the item when Undyne pushed it into her hands. "B-but I didn't get you anything!"

"Then I'm expecting a gift when we get back together after I'm done with my work and you've finished yours", she replied and laughed. "Go on, open it up!"

Alphys stared at the gift in her hands a moment before snapping back to reality and undoing the wrapper. Within was a DVD case containing Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Season 1, the complete collection. The first few episodes of that collection were the ones that they had watched together the first time that Undyne had slept over at Alphys's place to watch anime with her, after Alphys had hooked her with Slayer no Gokaru. That day after Alphys had confessed things to her Undyne had understood why that particular case was so often under Alphys's pillow.

"Undyne! You... you shouldn't have!" Alphys exclaimed and squeezed her tightly again. "Thanks so much!"

"I'm glad you like it!" She returned the hug and kissed Alphys's nosetip. "Maybe it'll help you sleep a little better."

This made the drake blush furiously. "Y-y-you knew that?"

"Ages ago. I never realized why you were doing it though." She nuzzled her a bit longer then let go. "When we meet up again we're going to watch it together, okay?"

"Mhm! I can't wait!"

A few minutes later Undyne left the room. Having recalled to the palace would've been quicker but she felt like warming up a bit for the trip, and thus jogged through the streets with her backpack on. She tried to remember what she knew about elves. Guu had said that they had pointy ears and purple skin... maybe they looked like some purple-skinned version of Ichigo, the protagonist of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie? She had pointy ears. Then again wouldn't Guu have remarked that the elves had "feline ears" instead of saying "pointy ears"? Or maybe they were a sort of furred creature?

Maybe it was a species looking like Muffet! As far as Undyne knew, she could have pointy ears underneath that "Alice" haircut that she always had.

When she noticed Ice Bear seated on a bench near the palace she changed her course to head straight for him and summoned her armor onto her body as she ran (save for her helmet of course, there was no need for that right now), but as she came closer she noticed the presence of someone else, half buried in his white fur. Wait, was that Sans?!

"Made yourself a new friend, I see", Undyne remarked as she came to a halt before the two of them, and grinned at Ice Bear. "Hello Sans. I can't say I expected to see you around here. Did Guu ask you to come along as well?" Just then a scent from the skeleton drifted over. She sniffed the air. "... you smell like someone dunked you into a vat of ketchup, by the way."

[Ice Bear]

"Annyeonghaseyo!" Ice Bear stated firmly as Undyne commented on the ketchup-smelling Sans.

Ice Bear stood up... he has a weird sensation.

He saw what appeared to be a wierd car, decorated in party decals and tricked out... being driven by a small dragon... and he saw what looked like his brothers.

... no, it couldn't be. Ice Bear rubbed his eyes.

"What's up?" Undyne asked carefully.

Ice Bear suddenly go up, backpack still on his back, and darted towards the car with lightning speed.

"Hot damn!" Undyne said.

Sans looked up, sobering up quickly.

"Grizz. Panda. Ice Bear is here." He said over and over, trying to get his brothers' attention.

As Ice Bear was running, Grizz and Panda took a look around.

"Huh. This is a neat town. What's it called again?"

"The Great City of Ambrosia!" The small dragon responded swiftly.

Panda looked off to the side. "Hey, is that..."

Grizz looked "BRO!"

Spike stopped as Ice Bear hit the side of the car. He fell over, blinked a bit.

"Ice Bear meant to do that."

Grizz and Panda hopped out of the car. Spike went to check for damage to the car.

"Oh bro! We missed you!" Grizz said.

Ice Bear immediately hugged Grizz and Panda at the same time. "Ice Bear missed YOU. Been days." The three brothers were finally reuinited.

"Ice Bear came here... brothers weren't here... now they are." He embraced them again, crying a bit.

"Aw, we missed you too... but we only missed you for part of today... you were back home... and somehow we got on the beach in some other part of this... world?" Panda stated with some confusion.

Spike was confident that no damage occured. "Well, at least the car's not beaten up. I guess my job here is done!"

Ice Bear handed Spike some coins. "Ice Bear tip."

Spike pocketed the coins. "Gee, thanks." He said. He decided to head back to Pinkie Pie. He drove towards the gate from where he came.

"So... what do you do here?" Grizz asked.

Ice Bear pointed to Undyne and Sans "Ice Bear is on Quest for Princess Guu. You two, go to Ice Bear cave in Cavern Grotto. Tell them Ice Bear sent you. Dan and Bob are bear couple. Cave on the left is Ice Bear's, number 9. Dan and Bob are number 8."

Grizz looked around. "So... you teleported here somehow... and now we're here with you?"

Panda looked a bit sad. "We have to get used to this all over again."

Ice Bear nodded. "Ice Bear did... but bros will make it better."

Grizz and Panda decided to head towards Ice Bear cave, but they wanted to talk to Ice Bear a bit.

"We have so many questions for when you get back... but one you gotta tell us: is this place anything like San Francisco?" Grizz asked.

"It's... in ways better. Ice Bear thinks it's better with brothers, however." Ice Bear said sagely. "Also mainly vegetarian. Outside fish."

Panda looked up in amazement. "Wow. It's... like heaven. Did we die or something?"

Ice Bear shrugged his shoulders. "Dunno."

Grizz looked at the entertainment district of town. He saw the public access TV station.

"Panda, look! Public access! Maybe we can get on TV here and have some fun!" Grizz looked excited.

Ice Bear nodded. "Ice Bear would watch."

Panda was in awe. "Grizz, maybe I can find a girlfriend here!"

Grizz smiled. "That's the spirit!" He then turned to Ice Bear. "Bro, you'll be okay right?"

Ice Bear sagely nodded. "More than okay." He then hugged them. "Ice Bear missed you two."

Grizz and Panda were held tightly.

Ice Bear then turned to Undyne and Sans. "Sans, Undyne... Grizz, Panda."

"Hello!" Undyne said.

"Yo!" Sans muttered.

"Heyo!" Panda and Grizz said in unison.

"We're totally gonna have to have some fun together later... but for now, we're gonna go home... we need to figure out how to furnish your new place."

Ice Bear summoned two sleeping bags. "Until Ice Bear gets back." He handed the sleeping bags over to them.

"Woah! That's cool bro!" Panda said. "Are you magical or something?"

Ice Bear shrugged his shoulders.

The two brothers headed to Ice Bear's home... which would become their home. Panda started going over OmniTwitter right away, before they even went home. Grizz started thinking of acts to do on public access television.

Ice Bear waved, as they went home. He turned around.

Undyne asked "are you good, man?"

"Ice Bear is more than good." the polar bear said firmly.

"Wow, your brothers came here! That's so cool!" Undyne said with excitement.

Sans was a bit emotional. If Ice Bear could find his brothers... Sans could find Papyrus.

[Sans]

lucky bastard…

If he hadn’t been sobering up from all the ketchup-flavored soda he had been drinking, he would have definitely been crying at that moment. A small part of him was bitter, envious even. He had been looking for Papyrus for what must have been a year, and some random polar bear managed to find his own family just by sitting around and talking. Perhaps the world just had a wish to screw up his own life so that everyone else could be happy like he was some kind of hero sacrificing himself for the greater good. If this was what a hero had to go through, he would rather just throw in the towel and go home. He wasn’t a hero. Monsters like Undyne were heroes.

Yet, at the same time, a wave of hope washed over him. It was an unfamiliar feeling, one he hadn’t experienced in a while, even after Frisk had informed him of her loss of powers. Papyrus had to be somewhere. If the people of Ambrosia could stick their necks out like this for some bear that likely no one knew, then he too, potentially, could find Papyrus.

He fantasized about the possibility for a few moments. A small, pink car covered in multicolored ribbons, sparkling glitter, zooming into town with a massive dragon as its noble carrier. And there, sitting in the driver’s seat, miming a racer in first place, would be his tall, skeletal brother. He wasn’t certain what he’d do if he saw that. He could shut down; he could cry; he could become so happy that it would put Undyne’s reunion with Alphys to shame. Either way, he was certain that, no matter what, he’d take Papyrus far, far away from where anyone could touch him again. Build a house on an island somewhere, perhaps. Be a family again.

It was just a matter of finding him first.

Undyne turned to face Sans. “So… why do you smell like someone dumped a vat of ketchup all over you?”

“Sans is drunk.” Ice Bear said, brandishing some candy bars. “Ice Bear has been sobering him up.”

“ive been tappin’ into my hedonistic side!” the skeleton said, the drunken drawl in his voice having dissipated.

Undyne shot him a raised eyebrow. “You mean sleeping and lazing about?”

Sans shrugged. “who wouldn’t want to sleep and laze about all day?”

“Those of us who want to grow big and strong, obviously!” She stood tall, maintaining a posture of dominance with a big, toothy grin on her face.

“yawn.” Sans said. Undyne rolled her eyes before sitting down next to him.

“So, why exactly are you here? Not that I don’t mind seeing a familiar face, but you don’t strike me as the kind of monster to be hanging out with soldiers on a mission.”

“tibia honest...” he said, pausing to allow his pun to sink in. Both Ice Bear and Undyne groaned. Satisfied, Sans continued.

“tibia honest, i was hopin’ i could tag along, ya know. the princess is comin’ with, right?”

"...while drunk?"

"not-quite drunk. i'm sober. just ask ice bear."

Undyne nodded and looked at the polar bear. Ice Bear shrugged his shoulders.

“...right. i wanted to ask her some questions while she’s in the area.”

“I see.”

“speakin’ of questions, what exactly are you guys doin’?” Sans asked.

“Guu wants Ice Bear and Undyne to help her with a bad tree.”

“a bad tree, huh? what's the root of the issue?”

“We basically have an evil tree causing problems for these people called elves,” Undyne said, deciding to ignore his pun, “and Guu wants to take us to deal with it.”

“elves, huh? pointy-eared people?”

“Yeah.”

“dark, wood, or high?”

“Um…”

“how many rings do they got?”

“I… don’t know?”

Sans shrugged. “guess we’re gonna find out.”

[Guu]

“So you want to tag along?” Said a voice in San’s head.

“Who said that?” Sans replied, looking back and forth.

“Who said what?” Said Undyne.

“Well, if you want to follow us, I won’t stop you. But if you impede the mission it won’t be fun for either of us.” Continued the voice. “Looking at your capabilities, yeah, let’s avoid that.”

“For the rest of you,” the voice suddenly appeared in the real life, giving the others a jump, “Are you all ready for the mission?”

“Guu? You’re here? How long have you been here?” Undyne inquired.

“Ice Bear also wants to know.”

What rose from under the bench was what at first appeared to be an insect of some sort, but as it got closer to the group… well… it was Guu. She couldn’t have been bigger than a few inches, she had semi-translucent butterfly wings, and wore a yellow dress that barely covered her body. Thankfully she was wearing bloomers, so socially speaking, she was covered.

Undyne picked up on it quickly as she had seen a very gory anime that had featured creatures of these types, something with demons and giant swords. Oddly enough, that didn’t narrow it down at all.

“Guu? You can turn into a fairy?”

“Pretty much. Kind of liberating.” She said as she did a barrel roll in the air, while silently mocking Star Fox’s use of the term in her head.

‘That’s so cool!“ Cried out Undyne, gleeful to see what a true magical princess can do.

In a flash of light, she suddenly appeared in her default form, slowly descending back onto Ambrosia dirt. Her dull eyes automatically reminded Sans of Frisk, though her body was so alien, it was hard to determine if she was actually human.

“To answer your question, I’ve been here for about five minutes. If you were afraid of me stalking you, I don’t have that kind of time.” She raised up a hand and a yellow bird automatically flew in and landed on her finger. “This bird knows the way to the elves. If you are all ready, he will take us.”

She pulled away her arm and the bird flew into a nearby tree.

“So what say you all? Are you ready for a quest of danger and intrigue?”

Each of the group took turns looking at each other before returning their attention to the princess. Undyne gave her a look of unbound determination, Ice Bear and Sans were unchanged.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

She turned towards a seemingly random direction and pointed a fingerless arm, the yellow bird suddenly flying overhead in that direction.

“Onward.”

[Ice Bear]

Ice Bear checked his pack to ensure that everything was secure. As he started walking, he hoped that Panda and Grizz would be fine. After that thought, all points were on the task at hand. Apparently some elves needed Guu's help, and Ice Bear was obliged to help out. Even if he wasn't obliged, his services could be of some use. After all, this is the same Ice Bear who traversed the Northwest Passage and helped to keep his two brothers alive using nothing more than a fire axe and some cheap ninja stars back home.

Ice Bear was up to the challenge. Plus he had Undyne and Sans to help out as well. The three of them should easily aid Guu in her quest.

As for the transformation bit that Guu did, Ice Bear had seen worse, and just kind of rolled with it at this point. It wasn't his forte to question oddities in a world where the oddities were the norm. He'd just go along with it.

"Ice Bear fire extinguisher... check... Ice Bear fire axe... check... Ice Bear snacks... check... Ice Bear canteen... check..." he said, checking his bag once more as they walked.

"heh, making sure you have everything?" Sans asked.

"Ice Bear likes to be prepared."

"heh, you mean pre-beared?"

Ice Bear rolled his eyes at the skeleton's lame pun. "Ice Bear thinks you can do better than that."

"Feh... Sans, I have to agree with Ice Bear." She said, gritting her teeth.

Sans blushed. "heh..."

Undyne then noticed ahead of Guu, something in the bushes.

"Ma'am, hold it." Undyne asked Guu as they all came to a halt.


"what is it?" Guu uttered in monotone.

Ice Bear readied his fire axe. "Ice Bear senses it too."

Sans did too. "Guu, come back here with us."

Guu retreated, not sure of the threat.

"feed... me"

Some vines appeared out of the bush.

"feed... meeeeee...."

Ice Bear saw a plant rising out of the bush... a venus flytrap.

"FEED... ME..."

Undyne shielded Guu. "We got this, Guu."

Guu just stood there, with a look of boredom.

"It's just a venus flytrap who can speak english, so what?" Guu said.

Ice Bear saw the vine-spewing flytrap waddling their way. He had to think of something. Then he remembered his fire extinguisher.

"Sans, act as a distraction for Ice Bear."

Sans went off to the side of the road, away from the group. He kept an eye on what Ice Bear was doing. "Hey there, fertilizer hog... do you want to... leaf us be? heheh."

The plant started turning towards Sans because of the bad pun. Even if Sans didn't have any flesh, the plant was sentient enough to not tolerate bad jokes™.

Ice Bear placed his fire axe down and got his fire extinguisher out. He pulled out the pin with his teeth and readied the nozzle.

"Heh, maybe I'll just plant myself here and do standup. Would you like that?"

The plant got easily angered at that last one.

"Heh... you know what, green grumpus? You just got janked." Sans said, looking at the plant. He then nodded the other direction. Ice Bear was standing, with his fire extinguisher pointed at the mouth of the carnivorous vegetable.

"Eat this." Ice Bear said as he unleashed the contents of the fire extinguisher into the gob of the monster's mouth. Out came a noxious spray that made the carnivorous plantlife choke and wheeze. Ice Bear then grabbed his axe quickly and chopped off some of the vines of the flytrap, which died off.

The flytrap retreated, whining... it's fate would not be known to the group.

Sans waved away the fumes as Ice Bear shook the can to refill it.

"Hey... that was a pretty cool move... and an even cooler pun."

Ice Bear blinked. "What pun?"

"Eat this. That was genius." Sans complimented the tall polar bear's one-liner.

"Oh." Ice Bear shrugged. "Ice Bear knows."

Undyne sighed "Aw man, I didn't even get to make a move."

Guu blinked. "Join the club."

Sans grinned. "Heh, next time you see a threat, be my guest to be on the frontline... or in this case... the front vine."

Undyne rolled her fish-eyes at that pun.

"heh"

Ice Bear and the others kept walking on after that incident. They headed south. Ice Bear cleaned off his axe as the group marched towards the mission. He looked at himself in the shiny reflection of the edge of the axe, before placing it back in the holder on the backpack.

[Sans]

The yellow bird perched itself on top of a tiny branch connected to one of the many, many forest trees they were walking through. It glanced around, absentmindedly rubbing its beady, black eyes with the base of its wings. After a few moments, it chirped before it flew off of the branch and towards their destination.

The group had been walking for upwards of thirty minutes with nary an interruption after the carnivorous plant. The occasional rustling of leaves and the small glimpses of shadows roaming within the forest put the travelers on edge, but Guu reassured them at every point. Despite that, Sans made sure he always held the rear of the group, if only to be able to check behind them without the others noticing.

They continued following the bird. The blackness of night soon took over the sky. The moon casted a silver luminescence onto the travelers below. A small, cold breeze blew through the forest, whistling a scratchy, dissonant tone that echoed all around the group. Aside from the wind, it was quiet, as if the forest itself had died with the light.

The Princess was as monotone and deadpan as she had been when she and Sans first met, and he couldn’t wrap his head around why. At least Ice Bear and Undyne took their environment with a degree of caution, judging from how tightly they held their weapons and their tendency to scan the darkness behind the trees. Guu, on the other hand, marched on with an uncaring grace to her step, as if there really was nothing to worry about. Was she confident in her ability to handle any threat that came their way, or was she simply stupid, spoiled even? Then again, leading a whole city required some level of intelligence, didn’t it?

He reminded himself of Desco. She was Guu’s best friend. Strange minds must have thought alike. Perhaps Guu just wasn’t human or a monster or anything he could reliably classify as something he could understand. He didn’t want to say she was a god, but the more he thought about her, the more he was beginning to draw that conclusion.

Regardless, she held the key to finding Papyrus. It was best if he stopped thinking about Guu and started to think about not screwing up. The last thing he wanted was for the Princess to grow suspicious of him and start speaking into his head some more.

“Looking at your capabilities, yeah, let’s avoid that.”

For the first time in his life, he couldn’t tell what someone meant when they spoke.

As he pondered, he didn’t notice that the group had stopped until he had bumped right into Undyne’s back.

“why did we stop?” he said, trying his best to sound jovial.

“We’ve got a problem.” Undyne replied, pushing to the front of the group. Sans followed suit.

A few feet away, underneath a wooden sign detailing the road they were on--it said Wall Street,-- sat a grey-colored wolf. A long gash cut along its stomach, small lines of blood dripping onto the dirt road. It looked emaciated, its skin outlining its bones and ribcage. It sat in silence, staring at the group, like a statue.

“Guys, it’s just a wolf.” Guu said, taking a step forward.

The wolf sprang to its feet, the action stopping Guu in her tracks. It bared its teeth, growling. Its eyes filled with ravenous, desperate hunger, it barked louder and louder, breaking the silence the forest once had.

“that thing’s just wolfin’ out over there.” Sans said, allowing the pun to sink in before realizing no one was going to react to it and deciding to keep going. “it’s like an old man yellin’ at us to get off its lawn.”

“Looks pretty old too. Doesn’t look like we’re the first to come by this way, either.” Undyne said, pointing at the wolf’s wounds.

Guu shrugged. “It’s just an old dog. We got a bunch of those here in the Greens.”

Sans snickered. “hey, undyne? ya think this one could win a muzzle-nuzzling contest?”

Undyne rolled her eyes, suppressing a giggle.

“Ice Bear is wondering why it’s alone. Wolves come in packs.”

The group stopped laughing.

The skeleton turned around. His eyes widened for a brief moment.

A large pack of similarly thin but doubly rabid and ravenous wolves circled them. Their eyes glowed in the darkness; their growls pervaded the air; their showed off their massive, sharp canines, drooling from the overwhelming scent of a potential meal. As they drew closer, it became more than clear that no amount of reasoning or firepower would hold them back from their singular purpose: the need to eat.

“uh…” Sans said, “anyone wanna throw us a bone or somethin'? that doesn’t involve me hopefully i mean?”

“No, but we do have a kickass battle pose!” Undyne said as she summoned her spear. She pointed it at the group’s left, readying herself to fight.

Ice Bear lifted his axe and faced the group’s right. Sans sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he stared down, smiling the whole while, at the wolves lining the rear. All the while, he glanced over to Undyne every few moments to ensure she was alright. Despite the danger to him, he was certain he could avoid getting eaten long enough for the whole pack to be killed off. He wasn’t certain he could say the same thing for Undyne.

He heard the small whirring of what sounded like a gatling gun. He looked behind him for a brief moment to see that the source was Guu, who had her left arm popped open and pointed at the still barking grey wolf.

He didn’t get much chance to comment on how ridiculous she looked doing that before the gun fired, bullets slamming into the old wolf and toppling it to the ground. The rest of the pack took that as the cue to attack.