Move Creation Workshop

[Omni]

Teaching time

What we classify as a powerup in the Omniverse is something that increases stats for all attacks. So if Dante makes a Devil Trigger that increases the ATK of all his moves at the cost of health ... that can't be done unless it's a powerup.

But increasing the strength of individual moves? That's as easy as adding a chargeup. Quoth the moves page: "If your character attacks with six times the strength of a normal punch, they'd better have six times the windup, or leave you winded because of how fatiguing it was."

Since Gyo only affects the strength of individual body parts in attack/defense (and Shu only affects the damage/defense of individual weapons) it's a move, not a powerup. Perhaps I should clarify that; it might sound like he could also, for example, shoot an energy blast out of that hand and have it be 10x the power. That's not the case. I believe I covered it with "He also can't do anything technical while trying to focus his aura, including most moves, as trying to do two at once would be simply impossible." Let me know on this if you guys saw/understood that so if necessary I can clear up the description.

I do think, Amaterasu, that you've got a point about the thrown weapon move, I was actually feeling that myself but decided to see if it would fly with others I should probably increase it to 600/900 OM and make it a variable move unless I'm very specific about the size/shape of the object I'm using. Then again, another part of me feels like it's just an extension of Physical Strength like a weapon, and it's stuff that I could already do, so ... it's a debatable one.

The same debate applies to Shu. I might have to get Alex in here for his opinion, since it's rather unprecedented, and I could go either way but I'm biased in this case. It's definitely a move that could lend itself to godmoding under the wrong player, so I'm wondering if I would approve it to someone else. For example, making up convenient scenery to use Gyo on (like a tree branch that he could imbue with Gyo, and then the enemy smacks into it instead of barging through it). But I think that would come under the same rules as usual godmoding personally, and I'd probably allow it as long as it was well-delineated.

[James Knight]

Brass Knuckles - 300 OM - Physical Strength:

Brass Knuckles are a set of stereotypical brass knuckles made out of a dark blue metal. They can be worn on either hand and allow him to punch harder than he otherwise would, meaning that his punches do a fair amount of damage. These take about three seconds for him to materialize and three more seconds for him to put on.

Is this better? Decided to give up on the Dark Card for now.

[Amaterasu]

Brass Knuckles - 300 OM - Physical Strength, Debuff Proficiency:

Brass Knuckles are a set of stereotypical brass knuckles made out of a dark blue metal. They can be worn on either hand and allow him to punch harder than he otherwise would, meaning that his punches do a fair amount of damage. These take about three seconds for him to materialize and three more seconds for him to put on. The knuckles also have another property in that they have a chance to give a concussion that could last about seven seconds to anyone they hit. Ten seconds is the amount of cool down this move requires.

Dark Card - Shock Bolt (RP Flavor, Ranged Proficiency, Ranged Materialize Proficiency, Remote Control Proficiency, Debuff Proficiency, 300 OM.)

The Dark Card Shock Bolt is a prototype weapon that when held up will cause a single cloud of dark blue energy to appear above Veritas and his opponent(s) on the battlefield. This discharges a bolt of Lightning that has the equivalent power to a Tazer. Other moves can be employed so long as he has one hand free to use this move. If they require both hands this move is canceled. The move is mildly draining on his stamina levels, akin to a medium workout. The lightning bolt causes the opponent to suffer muscle spasms when they hit, making it take twice as long to summon attacks that require weapons to be held in their hands for 15 seconds.  Has a cool down of twenty seconds. /

Brass Knuckles: You'd need to explain what this concussion does, how it affects whoever is hit by it. And I'd advise re-reading the Balancing moves part of the rules because of the cooldown - it's not really a big disadvantage. Finally, how tiring would the move be, and can it be used alongside other moves?

Dark Card - Shock Bolt:
-How is it "RP Flavor" if it has a cost associated to it?
-I think that Remote Control is not necessary for this move since it only fires one bolt and isn't really controlled, but I'm not certain.
-The weapon itself is not described.
-How long does it take to conjure the cloud?
-How fast the lightning bolt moves (if it's lightning-fast you might need Homing Proficiency since it would auto-hit)?
-Does it deal any damage besides the debuff?
-"A medium workout" is not specific enough, as that can be understood very broadly. Perhaps try putting it in numbers? Like "drains half of his total stamina" or some such?
-The debuff time is a bit powerful IMO, since effectively Veritas could be casting it again on an opponent with just 5 seconds of downtime between two casts. Consider giving it a shorter duration or a longer cooldown, maybe?

[James Knight]

Edited Brass Knuckles. Is it better now?

[Amaterasu]

Brass Knuckles - 300 OM - Physical Strength:

Brass Knuckles are a set of stereotypical brass knuckles made out of a dark blue metal. They can be worn on either hand and allow him to punch harder than he otherwise would, meaning that his punches do a fair amount of damage. These take about three seconds for him to materialize and three more seconds for him to put on.

With the debuff removed it's probably not as complex Anycase: how tiring would the move be? I don't believe it would have to be much more tiring than a regular punch, but still. And, can it be used alongside other moves?

[James Knight]

Brass Knuckles - 300 OM - Physical Strength:

Brass Knuckles are a set of stereotypical brass knuckles made out of a dark blue metal. They can be worn on either hand and allow him to punch harder than he otherwise would, meaning that his punches do a HIGH amount of damage. These take about three seconds for him to materialize and three more seconds for him to put on. This takes about ten x the effort of throwing a regular punch because the Brass Knuckles that he uses are very heavy, and as such require more effort to properly utilize. This cannot be used with other moves due to that.

[Amaterasu]

Brass Knuckles - 300 OM - Physical Strength:

Brass Knuckles are a set of stereotypical brass knuckles made out of a dark blue metal. They can be worn on either hand and allow him to punch harder than he otherwise would, meaning that his punches do a fair amount of damage. These take about three seconds for him to materialize and three more seconds for him to put on. This is tiring to a level of having held a set of barbells for about six hours. In other words, it's not something that he wants to do on a repeated basis. It can be used alongside other moves, but due to how tiring it is for him to do this Veritas will not normally attempt to do so.

I think I may not have been clear with what I meant to say in my last post What I meant is tiring is if Veritas uses the Brass Knuckles, how much more tiring they are compared to flinging a normal punch. If you want a suggestion, something like "Using the brass knuckles takes Verita about twice [or however much you want it to take] the effort of throwing a regular punch" would work, maybe?

[Malon]

In regards to this move: I wonder if the second part, allowing Malon to create cosmetic copies of items, is too broadly written? Not sure :|
What I want to convey with this move is that Malon is able to create "prop" replicas of most moves/supers etc. to later study them, show them to other people etc. or even fashion them into a move of her own.

Adventurer's Bag of Holding (600, requires Mimic)
[spoiler]

[/spoiler]

A magically enchanted leather bag which has enormous capacity, allowing Malon to store numerous objects without encumbering herself. It looks like a regular leather bag with "teeth" along the opening, and two leather straps to pull it shut. Objects, even those larger than the bag's opening, "disappear" when pushed into it, though the object can be no larger than an average horse. Malon can also not store anything in the bag that she cannot lift with two hands and no creature that is alive, undead, animated, a sentient robot etc. The bag can also not be used to "swallow" enemy attacks, nor can it contain artefacts. It can contain consumables, but only if they belong to Malon.

The bag can also be used for Malon to store a replica of an object, created with Mimic. To do so, when seeing the item she opens the bag and holds the opening facing upwards, after which a replica of the item appears above the bag and falls into it. The process consumes very little stamina but Malon must stand still for at least 3 seconds and use no other moves to be successful.
Replicas created this way are too fragile to be used in combat and do not decay after the 1 hour that a mimicked move usually lasts. They have no function outside of looking like the original: for instance the replica of a spellbook would only contain gibberish and imagery that look like spells and rituals, and a pistol has no mechanism inside that would allow it to fire a round.
She can create replicas of moves and Super moves and flavor items used for powers/Power-Ups (such as a jetpack for Flight or a vial with liquid as a Power-Up). Replicas of immaterial objects (such as a fireball or beam attack) are not possible to create.

[Essent Rose Allison]

Whipfist (Physical Strength, Ranged, Remote Control) (900 OM)

Essent turns a whole limb into a massing claw-like tentacle which she can extend the more focus she uses. This tenta-limb isn't actually a part of her body and can be harmed without harming the user. It can be summoned again but after a cooldown of three minutes. The claw is the diameter of her arm all around. It is an instant transformation. She must be standing still to use this move. The longer she makes it, the more focus it takes. The minimum amount of time to focus when it comes to extension is a minute with the max being three. It requires aiming manually before launch. There are two ways this power can be used: like a whip or like a shot (where it extends then immediately retracts). It can extend 2 yards at maximum. Essent can only shoot/whip three times before getting tired.

[Amaterasu]

Whipfist (Physical Strength, Ranged) (600? OM)

Essent turns a whole limb into a massing claw-like tentacle which she can extend the more focus she uses. She must be standing still to use this move. The longer she makes it, the more focus it takes. It requires aiming manually before launch.

Is Essent an eldritch abomination in disguise or something? :frog: Anycase! The base for the move is good, but you need to be specific.

-What are the dimensions of the arm's "non-changing" sizes, like its claws?
-Is it a "shot" attack, as in that Essent stabs her claw-like tentacle and retracts it immediately after? Or does she swing it around like a whip? I presume it's that latter one judging from the name of the move.
-How far can it extend at maximum?
-In regards of the focus, how long must she focus to extend the whip to its maximum range? Is there a minimum amount of time that she has to focus?
-Turning her limb into a tentacle: does that require any time to transform? Is it done almost instantly?
-How tiring is it to use this move?
-Is the tentacle limb a part of her body that can be injured, or would it be like a weapon that can be broken without harming the user? If it's a part of her body, it would require Stretchability or Malleability to use along with the proficiencies that you have.

[Essent Rose Allison]

Whipfist (Physical Strength, Ranged) (600? OM)

Essent turns a whole limb into a massing claw-like tentacle which she can extend the more focus she uses. She must be standing still to use this move. The longer she makes it, the more focus it takes. It requires aiming manually before launch.

Is Essent an eldritch abomination in disguise or something? :frog: Anycase! The base for the move is good, but you need to be specific.

-What are the dimensions of the arm's "non-changing" sizes, like its claws?
-Is it a "shot" attack, as in that Essent stabs her claw-like tentacle and retracts it immediately after? Or does she swing it around like a whip? I presume it's that latter one judging from the name of the move.
-How far can it extend at maximum?
-In regards of the focus, how long must she focus to extend the whip to its maximum range? Is there a minimum amount of time that she has to focus?
-Turning her limb into a tentacle: does that require any time to transform? Is it done almost instantly?
-How tiring is it to use this move?
-Is the tentacle limb a part of her body that can be injured, or would it be like a weapon that can be broken without harming the user? If it's a part of her body, it would require Stretchability or Malleability to use along with the proficiencies that you have.

I just edited the post, it should include more detail.

[Amaterasu]

Essent turns a whole limb into a massing claw-like tentacle which she can extend the more focus she uses. This tenta-limb isn't actually a part of her body and can be harmed without harming the user. The claw is the diameter of her arm all around. It is an instant transformation. She must be standing still to use this move. The longer she makes it, the more focus it takes. It requires aiming manually before launch. There are two ways this power can be used: like a whip or like a shot (where it extends then immediately retracts). It can extend 2 yards at maximum. Due to how far you can extend, the power depends on Essent's SPD and TEC. The higher, the less tired she will be as it takes a lot of focus. The minimum amount of time to focus is a minutes with the max being three.

Well... while there's a lot more info in there now, the description feels very jumbled and confusing. I think that the pieces of information are not in order.

-"Due to how far you can extend, the power depends on Essent's SPD and TEC. The higher, the less tired she will be as it takes a lot of focus." SPD and TEC won't really influence that, it would just change how fast and how skillfully Essent can manipulate her whip-thing. Also, be more specific. Maybe say how long Essent can use the arm before being too tired, or how often she can "shoot" it?

-If it's not a part of Essent's body, how durable is it, and can it be repaired if damaged/destroyed?

-The two to three minutes to focus, what is it for? To shorten/lengthen the arm? Be a bit clearer please

-If it's variable in length and can be used for whipping and shooting, the cost would likely be 900 by the way. Just a note.

The bottom line is that the most must be understandable for anyone who reads it Try reading it from an outsider's perspective. (lame advice, I know)


Also, what Tearen said regarding elasticity: if the limb can dynamically stretch like rubber, then yes, you'll need it. But if you can lengthen/shorten the arm by focusing, then use it at its current length, physical strength + ranged proficiency would be sufficient.

[Marisa Kirisame]

Note that all modes under this form (the exception is yellow mode) have the same activation time. There is no duel wielding with dual knives move. Note the color mode is what the knife shows before using it. I also plan on condensing all the real knife moves into one.

Yellow mode (real knife) (homing proficiency, ranged materialize proficiency, ranged proficiency) (300)
The real knife is the same as the other forms except that it is a yellow blade. It will fire at the fastest rate of any real knife variation at a rather large lack of real power. the time it takes to activate this form is five seconds, it is like a machine gun for rate of fire. The concentration is fair and the energy is minimum also to be used. There is no limit to the "Ammo" (though its real use is to trip people up). This has a max length of about fifty feet diameter but the attack is not effective at all at that range (best range of effect is around twenty five feet or so after that it gets fairly unreliable in terms of attack and being able to hit the target)

Cyan mode (real knife) (Physical strength and ranged proficiency's, Ranged materialize, remote control) (600)
This mode is like the rest except its ability's to grab onto people and the rip limbs and stuff off. This is one of the strongest forms in terms of strength but it is also one of the most taxing with concentration and energy. the max length is twelve feet. The cyan grab needs as much or more Atk to break free with little trouble.

Orange mode (real knife) (300) (requires ranged proficiency)
Orange mode is like red mode in all ways except being able to change direction at will. nothing special except that each change in direction lessens the impact by ten percent of the original atk. Concentration and exhaustion increases with orange slash released (max is four but the max distance is fifteen feet.

Dark blue (real knife) (300) (requires melee proficiency)
This mode is special in that it changes the knifes length to any length up to ten feet. The blade the closer it is to the actual blade the faster it moves. (takes about five seconds for the ten foot blade to completely hit the ground and half the time half way. The durability of the blade is fairly hard to break. but the exhaustion for any length above six feet even is heavy due to the weight of the blade has increased dramatically.

Purple mode (real knife) (300) (requires ranged proficiency, area attack proficiency)
This makes three slashes like red mode except that the first slash acts like a buffer against moves allowing the other two to go in and explode. It can not change direction and is fairly taxing and concentration is medium. The explosion radius is about three to four feet
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My special hell (tier three super offensive) (1000) (requires area attack proficiency, teleportation, ranged proficiency, ranged materialize proficiency)

Chara's trump card in offensive attacks. the attack has a diameter of fifty feet by fifty feet think a can (closer to the center the more  damage it deals) She will stab the ground charging her red mode this causes the ground around her to grow red. Then after twenty seconds after the knife has been stabbed into the ground. burning death will quickly go to one hundred feet in height for five to ten seconds before it dissipates. This causes great exhaustion in Chara and this will cause things to be disintegrated (not primes of course, but trees, rocks, buildings, civilians all will be gone (like a atom bomb).

Glitch (tier one super defense) (600) (requires teleportation)
Chara will glitch out of the way of any tier one super offensive. that is all there is to it.

[Simon]

Working on an alt character- or more specifically, his starting move. Is the price and description okay so far? I'm thinking it might need some more work.

X-Buster [600 OM - Requires Ranged Proficiency]
The X-Buster is a traditional, yet effective arm cannon. X can form one or both of his hands into X-Busters, an automated process that doesn't take more than a second. When readied, the Buster is capable of firing softball-sized energy projectiles at the speed of a handgun. These shots travel at the speed of arrows up to a maximum range of 40 meters. X is capable of shooting while moving, though at the sacrifice of accuracy.
The X-Buster also contains an energy amplifier for charging up more powerful blasts. It takes 3 seconds to charge up a blast of safe maximum output, producing a shot about 3 feet in diameter moving at the speed of a rocket. X can still move normally while charging, but he cannot fire any weapons from his Buster. If both X-Busters are deployed, they cannot be charged simultaneously, and cannot fire normal shots while charging.
X's advanced energy core allows him to theoretically fire shots infinitely, but ages of non-use have made the weapon inefficient; overuse of the buster can seriously debilitate him, especially charged shots.

[Alex Mercer]

Pummeling Gale:
Aang's preferred offense is a nonlethal one. Using sweeping, circular motions, Aang can summon up strong winds that batter opponents and knock them about without leaving much lethal or long lasting damage. Aang can unleash these in rapid succession. They originate from him, but with they can curve to strike sideways at an opponent, circumventing cover, or curve upwards and downwards to juggle or prone his target.

Requires:
Ranged Proficiency
Area Attack Proficiency
Remote Control Proficiency

My question is pricing. While this move is seemingly straight forward, it has a lot of different "technique" applications for smart fighting.

1. Jab. This is just a straight forward pummeling gale from point A to point B. Essentially, it would thrust a target straight back.
   
2. Side-Curve. This is launched sideways from point A so that it curves before hitting point B from a side angle. This one would thrust a target sideways.
   
3. Uppercut. This is launched with a downwards arc so it travels close to the ground, then curves upwards before hitting the target. This is meant to thrust a target upwards into the air.
   
4. Slam. This is launched with an upwards arc from point A to point B, where it slams down in an attempt to thrust the target to the ground.
   

I used matching wording "Thrust" to symbolize a similar effect each time that always happens. The Jab is the greatest difference, in that it does NOT possess an arc. Would the price really be 1200 because of these variables?





Dancing Leaf
Airbenders are notoriously weak when it comes to taking a hit. They prefer evasive maneuvers, circling an opponent until they wear themselves out. Aang is no exception. Instead of relying on toughness of body, he uses a combination of technique and speed to evade. The motions of his body create air currents that help redirect attacks to create an even larger gap between himself danger. Those who do not have the technique and strength to overcome this obstacle often seem greatly outmatched; considering the flow of air is an invisible helper. The Dancing Leaf technique uses primarily a combination of Speed and Technique, though the winds that redirect attacks use a combination of Attack and Technique.

Requires:
Remote Control Proficiency
Foresight
Master Acrobat
Burst Motion

I'd like to see what people think, maybe the pro's and con's of this move. What I'm thinking is it requires a fighter to be either strong and fast, or fast and skilled. Of course some area attacks would bypass this altogether (though things like blade-like AoE would still be dodgable. Fireball not so much.)

[Omni]

Pummeling Gale:
Aang's preferred offense is a nonlethal one. Using sweeping, circular motions, Aang can summon up strong winds that batter opponents and knock them about without leaving much lethal or long lasting damage. Aang can unleash these in rapid succession. They originate from him, but with they can curve to strike sideways at an opponent, circumventing cover, or curve upwards and downwards to juggle or prone his target.

Requires:
Ranged Proficiency
Area Attack Proficiency
Remote Control Proficiency

My question is pricing. While this move is seemingly straight forward, it has a lot of different "technique" applications for smart fighting.

1. Jab. This is just a straight forward pummeling gale from point A to point B. Essentially, it would thrust a target straight back.
   
2. Side-Curve. This is launched sideways from point A so that it curves before hitting point B from a side angle. This one would thrust a target sideways.
   
3. Uppercut. This is launched with a downwards arc so it travels close to the ground, then curves upwards before hitting the target. This is meant to thrust a target upwards into the air.
   
4. Slam. This is launched with an upwards arc from point A to point B, where it slams down in an attempt to thrust the target to the ground.
   

I used matching wording "Thrust" to symbolize a similar effect each time that always happens. The Jab is the greatest difference, in that it does NOT possess an arc. Would the price really be 1200 because of these variables?

If you want to differentiate between a Thrust-type gale and an Arc-type gale (basically straight vs curve) that's 600. If you want to be able to vary the intensity, it's up to 900.

Remote control proficiency is for moves that can be changed mid-flight. Does that apply to this move?

Dancing Leaf
Airbenders are notoriously weak when it comes to taking a hit. They prefer evasive maneuvers, circling an opponent until they wear themselves out. Aang is no exception. Instead of relying on toughness of body, he uses a combination of technique and speed to evade. The motions of his body create air currents that help redirect attacks to create an even larger gap between himself danger. Those who do not have the technique and strength to overcome this obstacle often seem greatly outmatched; considering the flow of air is an invisible helper. The Dancing Leaf technique uses primarily a combination of Speed and Technique, though the winds that redirect attacks use a combination of Attack and Technique.

Requires:
Remote Control Proficiency
Foresight
Master Acrobat
Burst Motion

I'd like to see what people think, maybe the pro's and con's of this move. What I'm thinking is it requires a fighter to be either strong and fast, or fast and skilled. Of course some area attacks would bypass this altogether (though things like blade-like AoE would still be dodgable. Fireball not so much.)

This doesn't require Foresight unless I'm misreading. You could technically just use Burst Movement and Master Acrobat for this, no? Is there something this move does that those powers alone don't? It makes me think of those "Shield parry" type moves. You don't need a move for simply using your SPD/TEC/powers.

[Alex Mercer]

Pummeling Gale:
Aang's preferred offense is a nonlethal one. Using sweeping, circular motions, Aang can summon up strong winds that batter opponents and knock them about without leaving much lethal or long lasting damage. Aang can unleash these in rapid succession. They originate from him, but with they can curve to strike sideways at an opponent, circumventing cover, or curve upwards and downwards to juggle or prone his target.

Requires:
Ranged Proficiency
Area Attack Proficiency
Remote Control Proficiency

My question is pricing. While this move is seemingly straight forward, it has a lot of different "technique" applications for smart fighting.

1. Jab. This is just a straight forward pummeling gale from point A to point B. Essentially, it would thrust a target straight back.
   
2. Side-Curve. This is launched sideways from point A so that it curves before hitting point B from a side angle. This one would thrust a target sideways.
   
3. Uppercut. This is launched with a downwards arc so it travels close to the ground, then curves upwards before hitting the target. This is meant to thrust a target upwards into the air.
   
4. Slam. This is launched with an upwards arc from point A to point B, where it slams down in an attempt to thrust the target to the ground.
   

I used matching wording "Thrust" to symbolize a similar effect each time that always happens. The Jab is the greatest difference, in that it does NOT possess an arc. Would the price really be 1200 because of these variables?

If you want to differentiate between a Thrust-type gale and an Arc-type gale (basically straight vs curve) that's 600. If you want to be able to vary the intensity, it's up to 900.

Remote control proficiency is for moves that can be changed mid-flight. Does that apply to this move?

These moves are pretty straight forward (metaphorically speaking. XD) They generally have an arc to manipulate a target with heavy gusts. However, I'll drop the Jab, since Airbending is all about sweeping motions. Also, I might add charging effects later.

So essentially it's a 300 arcing gust attack. I just reread the rules, and I don't think I'll require Remote Control, since the arc is pre-planned. IE the target can dodge and the attack simply misses.

Come to think of it, I might drop the remote control proficiency, and grab it later (to symbolize growth and range of control.)

Dancing Leaf
Airbenders are notoriously weak when it comes to taking a hit. They prefer evasive maneuvers, circling an opponent until they wear themselves out. Aang is no exception. Instead of relying on toughness of body, he uses a combination of technique and speed to evade. The motions of his body create air currents that help redirect attacks to create an even larger gap between himself danger. Those who do not have the technique and strength to overcome this obstacle often seem greatly outmatched; considering the flow of air is an invisible helper. The Dancing Leaf technique uses primarily a combination of Speed and Technique, though the winds that redirect attacks use a combination of Attack and Technique.

Requires:
Remote Control Proficiency
Foresight
Master Acrobat
Burst Motion

I'd like to see what people think, maybe the pro's and con's of this move. What I'm thinking is it requires a fighter to be either strong and fast, or fast and skilled. Of course some area attacks would bypass this altogether (though things like blade-like AoE would still be dodgable. Fireball not so much.)

This doesn't require Foresight unless I'm misreading. You could technically just use Burst Movement and Master Acrobat for this, no? Is there something this move does that those powers alone don't? It makes me think of those "Shield parry" type moves. You don't need a move for simply using your SPD/TEC/powers.

I'm dropping Insight, you're right it really isn't needed. I suppose a better way to word it would be that the move simply redirects incoming attacks slightly while Aang is dodging? So the dodge is its own thing, but the move is actively effecting the opponent, making it more difficult to hit on top of that?

I'm just trying to go for the Airbender's evasive style. Aang has 0 defense. XD

[Omni]

Ah I see, the part about redirecting attacks as well as dodging. So yeah that'd be 300.

As an aside, I'd recommend at least a 1 in DEF for Aang. Your average human being is a 1, with trained people being 2, and 0 representing essentially the elderly or infirm.

[Amaterasu]

Note that all modes under this form (the exception is yellow mode) have the same activation time. There is no duel wielding with dual knives move. Note the color mode is what the knife shows before using it. I also plan on condensing all the real knife moves into one.

Yellow mode (real knife) (homing proficiency, ranged materialize proficiency, ranged proficiency) (300)
The real knife is the same as the other forms except that it is a yellow blade. It will fire at the fastest rate of any real knife variation at a rather large lack of real power. the time it takes to activate this form is five seconds, it is like a machine gun for rate of fire. The concentration is fair and the energy is minimum also to be used. There is no limit to the "Ammo" (though its real use is to trip people up). This has a max length of about fifty feet diameter but the attack is not effective at all at that range (best range of effect is around twenty five feet or so after that it gets fairly unreliable in terms of attack and being able to hit the target)

Cyan mode (real knife) (Physical strength and ranged proficiency's, Ranged materialize, remote control) (600)
This mode is like the rest except its ability's to grab onto people and the rip limbs and stuff off. This is one of the strongest forms in terms of strength but it is also one of the most taxing with concentration and energy. the max length is twelve feet. The cyan grab needs as much or more Atk to break free with little trouble.

Orange mode (real knife) (300) (requires ranged proficiency)
Orange mode is like red mode in all ways except being able to change direction at will. nothing special except that each change in direction lessens the impact by ten percent of the original atk. Concentration and exhaustion increases with orange slash released (max is four but the max distance is fifteen feet.

Dark blue (real knife) (300) (requires melee proficiency)
This mode is special in that it changes the knifes length to any length up to ten feet. The blade the closer it is to the actual blade the faster it moves. (takes about five seconds for the ten foot blade to completely hit the ground and half the time half way. The durability of the blade is fairly hard to break. but the exhaustion for any length above six feet even is heavy due to the weight of the blade has increased dramatically.

Purple mode (real knife) (300) (requires ranged proficiency, area attack proficiency)
This makes three slashes like red mode except that the first slash acts like a buffer against moves allowing the other two to go in and explode. It can not change direction and is fairly taxing and concentration is medium. The explosion radius is about three to four feet
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My special hell (tier three super offensive) (1000) (requires area attack proficiency, teleportation, ranged proficiency, ranged materialize proficiency)

Chara's trump card in offensive attacks. the attack has a diameter of fifty feet by fifty feet think a can (closer to the center the more  damage it deals) She will stab the ground charging her red mode this causes the ground around her to grow red. Then after twenty seconds after the knife has been stabbed into the ground. burning death will quickly go to one hundred feet in height for five to ten seconds before it dissipates. This causes great exhaustion in Chara and this will cause things to be disintegrated (not primes of course, but trees, rocks, buildings, civilians all will be gone (like a atom bomb).

Glitch (tier one super defense) (600) (requires teleportation)
Chara will glitch out of the way of any tier one super offensive. that is all there is to it.

My Special Hell: You should wait with considering T3 Super Moves until you are coming close to the level required to purchase them. I'm skipping a review of it in favor of your other moves, unless you want to reduce it to a T1/T2 Super Move.

As a rule of thumb for your other moves, try to write them as if you were explaining them to someone who has never heard of them and who's trying to picture them. You'll need to be specific, even if the move description becomes very long.

Yellow Mode (Real knife):
-"like a machine gun for rate of fire" is a little too unspecific, as machineguns can vary a lot from model to model.
-"The concentration is fair and the energy is minimum also to be used." Be specific How does Chara need to concentrate? Can she not move or use other moves as a result? And how much stamina does it cost?
-"This has a max length of about fifty feet diameter", this would be a pretty huge projectile. Or did you mean that 50ft is the maximum range that it can reach? In which case we'd need to know what the projectile looks like.
-Why are the ranged materialize and homing proficiencies in the requirements? I see no mention of either in the description.
-You should also explain how the knife fires. Does Chara point it? Does she slash with it like for other Real Knife moves?

Cyan mode:
-If I understand correctly this is a lasso/rope type of move, since it can grab onto people? I can't quite picture this.
-"ability's to grab onto people and the rip limbs and stuff off", note that ripping a limb off would be VERY high damage that you can't do with just any attack. To tug at an opponent is one thing, to tear something off is another.
-Why are the ranged materialize and homing proficiencies in the requirements?
-How does Chara need to concentrate? Can she not move or use other moves as a result? What is the stamina cost?

Orange mode:
-Again, stamina cost and how long it takes and how much focus to use it (and to redirect the attack).
-What does the 4 maximum mean? Can four slashes be in the air at the same time?
-This would require the remote control proficiency.

Dark blue:
If I understand correctly, Chara can make the knife's size up to 10ft, but the bigger it is the slower it moves and the more exhausting it is to wield?
-I would try revising the move's description as it's a little bit confusing.
-What is the 5 second "to hit the ground"? Is that the amount of time it takes to lengthen the blade to its maximum size?
-How exhausting is the move to use?
-How long does it take to shrink the knife again?
-Can it be used alongside other moves?

Purple mode:


(WIP! Will edit everything else in soon)

[Dane Regan]

There's no "area utility" proficiency, so for the 2nd move I'm not sure if it needs anything. It's not exactly offensive or defensive. In case it's not obvious, these are not aimed directly for combat use, although the latter could be used to help assassinate someone. I think the rules are fair, but I'd like some input. My aim here is to have "cheap" utility skills. So, should they cost more than 300, I'd rather nerf them down to the 300 baseline. And if possible avoid the need for any proficiencies or powers. 

(for reference, the current restrictions mean these can only be used in Dane's base form, which has the stats: ATK: 1, DEF: 2, SPD: 3, TEC: 5. The alt is ATK: 5, DEF: 0, SPD: 5, TEC: 1)

Muffle (300):
[spoiler]Dane creates an invisible barrier that suppressed sound within a half a metre of himself in an attempt to move silently. So, any noise that would normally travel more than 0.5m from any point on Dane's body is reduced drastically. A twig stepped on will be completely inaudible, anything Dane tries to say, even him yelling, will likely remain. A pot knocked off a shelf, however, will still be heard if, and only if, it falls more than 0.5m away from Dane. 

This effect requires constant concentration, so attacks cannot be charged up, Dane cannot transform or change forms, Dane cannot summon with or otherwise use his Omnilium, and Dane cannot use any other move that requires concentration. He can still move normally, and use any non-ranged attacks that do not fulfill those conditions as well as any movement powers. The barrier primarily works one-way, so Dane can still hear all sound within it, as well as sound from outside. However, external sounds will seem reduced in volume about a third.

Primes with sensing powers will be able to hear the sounds as normal if they know Dane is using the effect, and concentrate on doing so. The effect takes 5 seconds to start (during which Dane cannot move and must concentrate) and will not end unless Dane wills it to (when he can restart it again by concentrating for 5 seconds) or he takes damage and thus loses concentration. If this happens, muffle cannot be used again for 1 minute. A very loud noise (any sound loud enough to leave your ears ringing) can break the spell, resulting in the same outcome as Dane taking damage.

Dane needs at least 2 TEC to use this move. Which currently means it cannot be used in his alternate form (but it might be possible after a stat increase).[/spoiler]
Silent Room(300):
[spoiler]Dane enchants a room, or a space, no larger than a 6m by 6m by 6m cube (20x20x20ft) with an effect similar to muffle. The area being physically enclosed is nice, but not required. No sound, barring the equivalent of loud explosion, will breach it. So, anyone inside cannot hear outside, and anyone outside cannot hear what happens inside. The effect takes 10 seconds to create (during which Dane cannot move and must concentrate) and cannot be moved afterwards unless bound to a mobile "space", such as a train carriage or a car interior. After which it remains as long as Dane wills it. It does not require intense constant concentration to maintain, so its use only restricts Dane's access to using Omnilium and other concentration based moves. It does not restrict the charging of moves, movement, powers, transformations, and the changing of forms.

Some small amount of concentration is still needed, so the effect ends if Dane travels more than 6m from one of the rooms sides, if Dane takes damage, if a very loud noise passes through the boundary, or if a someone else concentrates on removing the effect. This takes 5 seconds to do with a TEC of 5, and reduced by 1 second for each point of TEC above that, and increased by 1 second for each point below. So can be willed away instantly by anyone with a TEC of 10. A prime with a TEC of 5 or higher will instantly notice the effect upon either being inside it or standing within 6m of one of the sides. However, a prime with a TEC of 2 to 4 will not notice the effect unless they walk through the boundary themselves or have a sensing power, a prime with a TEC of 1 or more will notice the effect if they were within 1m of Dane when he created it, and a prime with a TEC of 0 will be incapable of sensing it at all, regardless of if they find out it exists - that said, if they have explosive or are able to make a very loud noise, they may still be able to end it.

Once noticed, the prime will feel "fuzzy" while within 6m of one of the sides and instinctively know how to shut it off through concentration. The method is unique to each individual. Some will picture it mentally as a castle and imagine smashing it down. Others will just yell profanities. And some will just turn it off like flicking a switch. Gestures may be used but they are not required. If someone trying to stop the effect is damaged, shoved, or distracted by any other means, all progress towards doing so is lost. So a prime with a TEC of 5 that focuses for 4 seconds before stopping will have to start again and focus for 5 seconds at once. Any prime with a TEC less than 10 cannot concentrate on any other attacks while trying to end the effect. So cannot charge an attack, transform, use Omnilium, or use any moves with a sensory power as a prerequisite. Basic moves and movement will work as usual.

If the effect if forcibly ended, Dane cannot use it again for 5 minutes. Otherwise, he just has to focus for another 10 seconds.

Dane needs at least 5 TEC to use this move.[/spoiler]