Hoshi no Guu (Star Piece Quest) (M)

[Guu]

“Power Rangers? Great.” Scott said, facepalming.

“I heard these guys formed last week.” Clarified Bani. “I guess they were for hire?”

“You will rue the day you sent your evil forces at us!” Yelled out the Red Ranger.

“Evil?” Guu asked.

“Yes, you stand against the will of Camelot, who are the good guys!”

“How can a verse that has Berry Blitzkrieg be the good guys?” Guu reasoned.

“Don’t try to confuse us with your vile lies!” Stated the yellow ranger.

“Camelot stands opposite of the Empire, so they must be the good guys!” Stated the Black ranger.

“And by the transitive propriety, that means you are evil and working for the Empire!”

“What they said!” Yelled out the pink ranger.

Guu sighed heavily, this kind of black and white dichotomy is the reason Ambrosia exists.

“Plus anyways, we didn’t send anything, you ambushed us.” Guu reasoned.

Silence befell the group. Then suddenly, the five leap into the air, doing somersaults into a group huddle position.

“She’s got a point, what should we do?” Asked the red ranger.

“We can’t initiate the attack, isn’t that against the rules?” Asked the black ranger.

“Well, technically, there is no rule stating we can’t do that.” Stated the blue ranger.

“Am I a man or a woman?” Asked the yellow ranger.

“Well, you’re speaking english right now, so woman.” Stated the pink ranger.

Suddenly, out from nowhere, someone else appeared. It was a ranger garbed entirely in green with a steer horns grafted on his helmet. The five turn to look and recoil in shock.

“The evil Green Ranger!” They yelled in unison.

“Yes, I’ve been brainwashed by Lord Palpatine to destroy you.”

“We will stop you!”

“I summon the Stallion Zord!”

“I summon the Swine Zord!”

“I summon the Duck Zord!”

“I summon the Chicken Zord”

“I summon the Cow Zord!”

Suddenly, five robots appear from different locations in the Tangled Green and then merged together to form one large humanoid-shaped robot. The Green Ranger pulled out a dagger which he played like a flute. A large green minotaur shows up and squares off against the ranger’s mech.

“Fire all weapons!” Yelled the Red Ranger.

The two robots fire weapons at each other until they both blew up, the zords shattering into pieces, supposedly killing everyone involved. Guu and co just stood there, bewildered by the spectacle they just witnessed.

“Guu, why is it that weird shit seems to happen around you?” Bani asked.

“Moths to the flame.” Guu responded.

[Guu]

“Goddamn it!” Yelled Scott.

The group stood before a giant fire where the Power Rangers fight had just taken place, which, upon closer inspection, was the second route into the mountains.

“Wait, so that whole Power Rangers thing wasn’t a collective hallucination?” Inquired Bani, now quickly getting more and more horrified at the fact that something so weird could actually happen. “Oh no, please let that be just momentary insanity!”

“I’m afraid not.” Said Guu, patting the concerned bunny girl on the back who was quivering on the spot.

“Can we forget about the stupid power rangers for a second? This fire they created cuts us off from our destination!” The demon yelled, now getting frantic.

“I guess we have no choice but to climb the mountain directly.” Stated Guu.

“Do you even know how steep that mountain gets!” Screamed the demonic ninja.

“Uh, no...”

“Agh! I’m surrounded by incompetence! We can’t climb that, we’re screwed! We’re so totally-”

Guu’s stretchy punch collided with the ninja’s face, knocking him out cold. The princess turned to the rest of the group.

“We should camp for the night. Not tackling that mountain right now.”


After gaining some distance from the fire, they settle down, building a far smaller fire and setting up tents. It was the first night out on the trail and the jungle wasn’t going to shut up despite them. Birds and insects still cried into the night, in the distance was the sounds of a t-rex stomping around, but it was way too far to be a threat at the moment. Once again, the flames were enough to keep predators at bay, at least that’s what Guu’s senses were telling her. The sounds of the jungle made for a rather peaceful ambiance, which almost made them forget the fact that today was a complete waste of time for the group.

They managed to get a spot next to the river, which allowed for them to get something easy for dinner. Each of them had a fish at the end of a stick to cook over the fire… Well, okay, only Bani did. Melani doesn’t eat meat, Chuck was nursing a headache, Pitchen was filling up on snacks, and Guu was cooking a Pokute.

“I’m surprised the rabbit of the group is the only one willing to eat fish right now.” Stated Guu as she took her eyes away from the struggling Pokute. “Aren’t rabbits vegetarian?”

“Generally yes, but my grandpa was pretty big on breaking social norms.”

Guu tossed away her stick as the pokute had escaped and ran into the woods.

“A grandpa, huh? Was he in a rabbit costume, too?”

“They aren’t costumes”

“You know what I meant.”

She sighed as she checked her fish if it was ready. Not quite browned enough. She pushed it back into the fire.

“He was a rabbit like me. A famed soldier.”

“Oh? What did he fight?”

“He killed a god.”

The sounds of fire crackling into the night took over the conversation as Bani gauged Guu’s reaction to that statement, seeing if it was worth continuing. Her neutral face wasn’t any help in determining this, but the fact she seemed to be paying attention was enough for her to move on.

“Well, my grandpa as well as his friends, they lived in this place called the Useless Forest.”

“Quite a name there.”

“It’s a place where animals who don’t fit their stereotypes go to stay, as most animal societies required you to act a certain way. For them, moving to the Useless Forest was the only way to be happy. However, the Useless God eventually got sick of them.”

“Useless God?”

“Yes, he waged war on the animals of the forest, but the animals eventually won.”

“How does someone kill a god?”

“Well, he was useless.”

“Point taken.”

Suddenly, Bani jumped as she noticed her fish was engulfed in flames. She tried to blow it out, but eventually just gave up and fed it to the flames.

“Well, my family was the result of that. My mom, my dad, my five brothers and sisters, each of them individuals, we were free from the judgement the rest of the world faced. I grew up not knowing what my grandparents went through. Probably would have gone my whole life not knowing. That is until...”

“You came to the Omniverse?” Asked Guu.

Bani let off a heavy sigh, falling backwards off in her camping chair to lie on the ground. Guu did the same, not sure what she was doing.

“At home, I was just some ballerina and performer, here I’m some sort of sex object. I was horrified why the people here wanted me to dance for them, it still bugs me what people continue to expect of me. It pains me I had to learn how to kill to survive. This world has brought nothing but suffering.”

Bani was silent as she processed the swirling maelstrom of thoughts that was her head. Guu’s arm slithered across the ground and landed on her shoulder in comfort. The rabbit girl batted it away.

“I don’t need comfort, I need a distraction.” She said in a little bit of a harsh tone. “Tell me about your family.”

“Well, three of my parents are comatose and the fourth is a maniacal primadonna who wanted to inspire insanity.”

Bani’s head was clear already. Nothing can stop a maelstrom of thoughts like a gust of absurdity.

“In the Omniverse, I have Ambrosia, as well as Molly, Sylvia, and Desco.”

“Wait, so you didn’t have a real family before getting brought here? That’s kind of sad.”

“Well, that’s not entirely true.” Guu continued, a hint of sadness in her voice. “I was adopted by a family in the jungle at one point. A mother named Weda, and a son named Hare. I lived with them for a couple years. I guess they could be considered family.”

“At least you had them.”

“Yeah.”

Before Guu fell asleep, she spent her final waking moments thinking of Hare. Despite her antagonism, she did miss the little nerd a lot. Just thinking of their adventures together brought a solemn smile to her face as she drifted into dreamland.

[Guu]

As Guu slowly shook awake, she already knew something was wrong. Orcs, hundreds of them, surrounding them from every angle. She looked towards Melanie to see if she was the only one to sense them, but was annoyed to see she was still asleep.

Scott, Bani, and Pitchen were awake. The bunny girl was stirring the remains of last night’s fire, the demon ninja was folding up the tents and shoving them down Guu’s throat. He realized the pink one was awake after the last tent went in.

“Oh, good morning Princess. Sorry about that, I didn’t want to wake you.” He stated plainly.

Pitchen seemed to be nursing a stomach ache, over-eating with the snacks the previous night seemed to be taking its toll now.

Guu redirected her attention to the orcs. They were quickly gaining ground on them, closing in, no means of escape. Even the tree line was surrounded with goblins taking up the canopy. She looked towards her group who was still none-the-wiser.

“The summit will be a pain to cross, but if we get a move on, we might make it to the bog before nightfall.” Said Check as he went to shove more camping supplies into Guu’s mouth.

“Uh guys?” Said Guu, finally decided it was worth warning them, though not much they could do about it, surrender is imminent with the practical army approaching.

“No need to wake up just yet Guu.” Said Bani. “Chuck and I have got this.”

“No you guys don’t.” The pink princess said bluntly.

“Yeah, I’m doing all the work here Bani, you’re just messing around with the campfire.” Argued the demon.

“Pfft, I’m just ensuring this thing doesn’t shoot any embers. Fire safety is important, considering what happened to the last two routes, that seems to be a theme on this trip.” Bani reasoned as she buried the ash into the dirt under where the campfire was sitting.

“Eh, point taken.”

Guu facepalmed, how do ninjas get this inattentive. The bunny goes over to shake the melon girl who stirs awake, and immediately flies into a panic.

“What’s wrong Melani?”

“I think she’s just worried about the thing I’ve been trying to warn you about.” Said the princess.

“What are you talking about Guu?” Asked Chuck as he shoved the last shovel down her throat.

Suddenly, from every direction, a horde of orcs appeared from the trees, spears drawn. Goblins appeared in the leaves above, bows and arrows pointed down on the group.

“That. Tried to warn you about that.”

The five slowly inch away from the green-skinned men until they were all back to back and the spears were still less than a foot away from slicing them open.



The group was all tied up, being lead through the jungle surrounded by the swarm of orcs, all of them ready to to attack if a single one of them made a move against them. They tied up each of them, though oddly enough, only Melanie was gagged. Guu could escape from her ropes, but she knew it was pointless. Even if she could escape her captors, there was no chance she could save all her friends.

“If we get out of this alive, Guu and Melanie really need to exchange night watch.” Said Chuck.

“Why were you both asleep to begin with, I thought neither of you actually need it!” Yelled Bani in a hushed voiced.

“I dozed off.” Said the pink one.

They were lead to a sizable orc encampment deep in the thickest part of the jungle. It was a hundred or so bamboo huts with animal bones strewn everywhere from past feasts. The smell of rotting flesh was pungent in the air, many of the animal corpses were eaten raw and left to rot on the ground nearby.

In the center of the village was a campfire that a team of goblins maintained on a constant basis, chopping firewood and paying close attention to the dying of the flames. Sitting nearby the fire was an elder orc woman dressed in long full body robes and a hood that was a dark shade of red. From the look of it, it felt like it was dyed with blood.

The orcs surrounded the fire and made the captives stand in a line in front of the old lady who looked towards the five with a perverse curiosity. She stumbled over to them and gave them a smile, her teeth crooked, stained yellow and black, her eyes pierced from under her hood, bloodshot.

“Welcome to the Blood Heart tribe my lovelies.” The orc woman said in an unusually raspy voice.

She waddled over to the five with a chuckle, her eyes rolling over each one.

“My kind worship fear. My mind’s eye can see your greatest terror and share it with my tribe. It is our greatest pleasure.” She said, her voice waving in out.

She looked over the tribe who obediently stood in a circle, eagerly waiting for any word from her. She turned her attention away from the her fellow orcs and towards Bani, who was looking very uncomfortable by the woman’s presence. She extended a palm toward her, who caused her to wince from the odor.

“You fear the lustful eyes of others, the expectations of your skin. My tribe knows your fear.”

The other orcs nod in recognition. There eyes shut as they appear to receive the old orc woman’s vision; a visualization of Bani’s fear.

The woman waddled over to Melani and extended a palm towards her.

“Mistakes of the past, things you can’t possibly redeem yourself for. My tribe knows your fear.”

The watermelon girl look scared, either from being a captive or from the woman being spot on. The image spread to the rest of the tribe who chanted in response

The old woman approached the the cybernetic moogle.

“Rejection, how cliche. My tribe knows your fear.”

Pitchen’s face displayed his shame, the old woman’s words stung like raging bees across his body. The orcs all grunted in annoyance.

The old woman approached the demon, raised a hand towards him.

“What you failed to become, what you still fail to be. Our tribe knows your fear.”

Chuck’s face didn’t change, it simply displayed contempt for his captors. The orcs stomped a single foot in unison in recognition of the old woman’s vision.

She approached the pink one.

“And I saved the best for last. Princes Guu of Ambrosia, our most honored guest.”

“If this is how you treat your honored guests, I’d hate to see how you treat your enemies.” Guu said sarcastically.

“What is it you fear?” The woman said as she began to raise her palm.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Warned the pink one.

She raised her palm entirely but looked disappointed.

“Why do you fight to conceal your fear? Are you that ashamed of it?”

“Trust me, this is me at my most merciful.”

The old woman straight up place her hand on Guu’s forehead and pierced her way into the pink enigma’s mind. What she saw was transmitted to the rest of the tribe and they all knew true terror.



When Guu regained consciousness, the tribe was in chaos. Each and every orc had gone completely and utterly mad, rampaging, bumbling, screaming, a full range of different forms of insanity broke out as hundreds started to slaughter each other just to distract themselves from the horrors they just witnessed.

The pink one slipped out of her ropes and grabbed one the blades that had been dropped on the ground. She moved to each of her friends and cut them free. Her party now loose, it was now a matter of escaping the village full of insane orcs.

“What the hell did they see?” Said Chuck, but he honestly didn’t want to know the answer to that question, none of them did.

One of the larger orcs charged into his fellow orcs, causing a hole where the five could dash into. They tried to look away as the charging orc got chopped apart by his fellow comrades, all of them screaming about the horror in their heads

They slowly made their way through the crowd, taking advantage of each new opening that would present itself. Luckily for them, their small statures would make them unnoticeable to the muscle bound mad men. Blood and body parts would fly everywhere. The group tried hard to avoid the non-stop gore, but each member inevitably got at least a little bit of blood and guts on them.

Eventually, they made their way out of the village. When they made it a safe distance away, they looked back on the carnage that was taking place. In the distance, they could even the children were not spared from the insanity, as they could see a group of children stabbing the hell out of a woman orc. One woman was bleeding out of her breast as it appears her baby took a large bite out of her after the vision hit.

“I tried to warn them.” Guu said.

No one else said a word, just shocked silence.

[Guu]

The five continued up the mountain. Luckily their hike has mostly been flat so far, but they could see through the parting in the trees the rocky treacherous steeper regions up ahead, not to mention the snow covered top.

As the group prepared themselves for, pulling out mountain climbing gear and snow clothes, Pitchen took this moment to speak with Guu.

“I’ve been worried. I got all these cybernetic enhancement but they don’t seem to do anything. I don’t run any faster or jump any higher than I did before. They certainly didn’t help us out in the orc village.”

Guu didn’t say anything in response, just stood in listen as Bani struggled to figure out how pants worked nearby.

“I’m no use at home, I’m no use here, I’m no use anywhere. I’m just a half robotic freak.”

He sulked down onto a nearby rock, laying belly first against the stone surface with his face hidden. Guu stepped up and laid a fingerless hand on his shoulder.

“I can always use my powers, read your abilities.” The princess said.

The moogle looked up at her, an uncertain and confused look on his face.

“You can do that? Why haven’t you don’t that sooner?”

“Well, apparently, your mechanical parts have the ability to block my senses.” She said, pushing up the glasses she suddenly has for some reason. “However, you should have the ability to lower those defenses.”

The fuzzy cyborg sat up on the rock and got comfortable.

“What do I need to do?”

“Just imagine a curtain opening, or a blanket rolling off your head. Just keep imagining that and you’ll open yourself to me.”

He processed what she said and then he shut his eyes, clasping his hands together while thinking hard about the visual image of a curtain opening. His mind really wanted to wander, one of his brothers was a stage performer, curtains was a strong reminder of what he left behind in Ambrosia, but he couldn’t think about that now, he needed to know what he could do to help the group.

He peeked a little through one eye, Guu was not giving any indicator that it was working or if he was even doing the right thing, not that he expected her to mind you but it would be helpful. He shut his eye and continued to imagine.

Or at least he would have continued if it weren’t the sudden intrusion of ten ninjas.

Ten men and women in dark purple robes stood just a few yards away from the group, all standing in a line posing dramatically.

“An ambush!” Yelled Captain Obvious, I mean Scott.

“We are the Snakemen ninja. We’ve been sent by Luke to assassinate you!”

“We’re on Ninja Village business, let us be!” Yelled out Bani.

“We don’t stand for Mokugakure. We Snakemen believe that they’ve gotten too big, too soft, ninja should only be involved in small organizations.”

“You don’t believe in Makugakure because it’s too big yet you’d work for Camelot...” Pointed out Guu who finally paid the situation any attention.

“We really needed the money.”

The ten jump into the fray.

Bani barely rolls out of the way as one nearly flattens her head. Her high heel got caught in the seams of the pants she was trying to put on. She’s rolling to dodge the attacks of two ninja as they tries to break free from the snow pants.

Melani is dodging each hit of the ninja, taking a few as speed isn’t her forte. She knows that a single punch would kill any of these ninja, but hitting a speedy target was a trick of its own.

Scott chugs down a transparency potion, causing the ninja’s attack to phase right through him, but it only took two throwing blades for his two opponents to realize what’s going on and sit down on nearby rocks, waiting patiently for his potion to ware off. He sighed, wishing that drinking more than one potion so close to each other wasn’t such a risk.

Guu’s opponents were actually wearing armor. Apparently her combat abilities were taken into account. She grabbed her two opponents and threw them hard against the ground, sending plumes of dust into the air. The two ninja however, quickly leapt back on their feet.

“That’s some good armor.” She said as he barely dodged out of the way of a sword swing.

Pitchen didn’t know what to do. His two opponents were inching their way towards him as he was backing away slowly, his hands up in protest.

“I’m just the support guy, no need to attack me!”

The ninjas however, just scowled behind their masks. He needed to do something. Thinking fast, he cast a fireball spell.

Suddenly, a stream of fire came out of the palm of his hand.

The two ninja backed away surprised. The moogle was shocked too, his fires spell was never that powerful. He needed to try this out.

He used his rock throw spell, and suddenly the boulder he was sitting on earlier was floating up in the air. The two ninja started to run, but they didn’t cover much ground as the rock suddenly slammed into them. He twist it midair and it slammed into the two ninja that was fighting Guu.

Seeing her opponents getting taken out by a giant boulder, she approached her moogle friend, who was elated.

“My princess! Did you see what I could do?” He said, he was beaming.

“You’re a bender.” She said bluntly.

“Say what?” Pitchen asked.

“Nothing, try air next.”

He cast his air spell and he sent a gust of wind, knocking over the two that was attacking Bani, giving her a moment to kick open her pants with the heel of her shoe.

“Excellent.” She opened her mouth and vomited some water onto the ground. “Try that.”

The moogle manipulated the water into a rope, lassoing the two ninja fighting Melanie, giving her the chance to give two powerful punches that sent them flying. The fuzzy one was bouncing with joy with his new abilities.

When the two waiting on Scott noticed what was happening they knew they were outmatched. They ran off into the woods, screaming about their foe’s ability to command the elements.

The group got together after that and pitchen got the praise he so desperately desired. As they continued on the trail, he was finally contented.

[Guu]

Eventually, the group came across a 50-foot cliff. When faced with the prospect of scaling the cliff or adding another few hours of walking to their hike… They still had to weigh their options.

Guu could naturally fly her way up, and because of Pitchen’s air abilities, he could fly almost as well as the pink one. Melani was small enough to ride on the princess’ back, which left Bani and Chuck with the climb.

The pink enigma and the cybernetic moogle flew their way to the top and dropped off Melani who secured a rope that extends to the bottom where Bani and Chuck attached harnesses to themselves. Bani was fairly quick, her athletic body making it easy to gain footholds. However, Chuck struggled his way up, each hand barely able to keep hold. Bani, noticing the woes of her partner, called out to him.

“We can have Guu and Pitchen carry you up. I doubt you weigh that much, Chuck.”

“No, I can do this.” Cried out the demon, his voice straining from the weight of his body.

Bani came across a crevasse in the rock and took a moment to sit down and look down at her climbing friend. His face was strained, and at first she thought it was because of the climb, but she had a feeling that something else was going on.

“Hey, it’s not big deal if you can’t climb it, we won’t hold it against-”

“Yes you will, you will mock me like you’ve done this entire journey, like you’ve always have.”

“Chuck...” The rabbit girl said, now concerned. “I never meant to hurt you, that was just playful banter, like we always do.”

“Playful my ass. I’ve been helpless this entire journey!” He yelled out, he almost squealed in pain as his hand lifted his weight again.

“Chuck, you’re not helpless, I mean, you’re part of the team.”

“My navigation was useless, my talents were useless, the only thing I did that helped the team this entire time was heal a cyborg to death!”

“You’re being too negative, you’ve been plenty help so far!”

The demon just grunted in aggravation.

The bunny girl jumped down from her sitting spot and repelled her way down the cliff side.

“The hell are you doing?”

She bounced down just below the demon and started extending a hand for him.

“Come on, take my hand.”

“No, I can do it on my own.”

“I won’t take this angsty shit, we’re supposed to be a team here, remember? So take my hand and we’ll climb this mountain together.”

The demon shot her a look, it looked half strained and half frustrated at first, but it quickly turned into a scowl, as if he was trying to intimidate her out of the way.

Sighing deeply, she reached and grabbed his hand herself. In a reflex action, he swatted at her wrist which repelled him away from the cliff a little bit. As it turns out, the clip holding him to the rope wasn’t properly secured. His harness detached. Bani screamed as she watched Chuck fall towards the ground.

Guu and Pitchen dash by and catch him midair. He was alive, but the rabbit girl could remember the face he wore as they carried him to the top of the cliff: one of a man resigned to an ill fate.

Bani climbed the rest of the way, she didn’t question why the two fliers didn’t carry her back up, she hoped they wouldn’t. She was too preoccupied with Chuck. She need the time to clear her head.

When she made it to the top, the first face she saw was Chuck, sitting on a nearby rock, his maw twisted into a disgusted scowl. It wasn’t directed at anyone, he was just staring off into space. The fall may not have killed him, but they failed to save him anyways.

“I’m sorry.” She said to the demon, it went unanswered, and unheard.

[Guu]

Chuck was silent as the group continued travelling down the otherside of the mountain. Pitchen stayed close to the demon ninja, he understood his pains from his most recent drama, but didn’t know how to answer to them. Bani was quiet, too, just stewing in her own shame. Leading the pack was Guu and Melanie who kept a good distance from the rest. With the current drama, someone needed to keep their heads on for potential dangers.

Though, admittedly, the pink one couldn’t help pandering what she could possibly say to help Chuck in this situation. She admits to herself that as soon as they teamed up with him, he seemed to be haunted by a string of failures. However, despite this, she doesn’t feel like he didn’t belong here. It was a probably a mortal thing; the emotional attachments of weaker beings that drove her to such thinking.

Suspiciously, they reached the edge of the bog with little trouble with the only obstacle being the encroaching shroud of night. They figured a trap was somewhere forward, this was getting too easy after all, and considering they were walking all day long not including the combat and rock climbing, they decided it was best to tackle the last leg of the journey in the morning.

Chuck was out like a light before any of the tents were up. Guu figured he’d at least toss and turn a bit before drifting to sleep, but he was probably worn. Bani and Pitchen worked together to get him on a comfortable spot and making it so a warm fire was going near him. Without a word, the bunny girl hit the sack herself, followed by the moogle who still couldn’t put a finger on how to help with this situation.

Guu and Melani was left for night duty, the intent was to sleep in shifts, but neither could really rest at the moment.

“I just want to get this damn star piece and be done with it.” Guu stated. “This trip has been quite the bummer.”

Melani nodded in agreement, but the pink one sighed in response. She wanted a distraction, but it was hard for a watermelon to be a proper one.

‘Does it suck to not be able to talk?“ Asked Guu. The melon paused for a second before giving a slow nod. “I guess I can understand that.”

The pair just looked up into the night sky. The moon was out full, the stars cluster in one large streak in the sky. Omni was being decorative tonight.

Suddenly, Guu had an idea, something that’ll surely pass the time.

“You know, I can read your mind.”

The watermelon shot her a look and cocked what might have been a figurative eyebrow.

“Yeah, I can look into your mind, you can tell me your story through thoughts.”

The melon girl placed a hand on her chin, rubbing it as she looked down at the dirt. Then suddenly, she turned towards the pink one and gave her a determined look.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” She stated, the melon responded with a nod. “Okay, prepare yourself as I establish a connection.”

She shut her eyes, Melani followed suit, and Guu could feel herself tapping into the fruit’s thoughts.


A long time ago there lived a village of watermelon people on an island. A great monster threatened this island, one with many eyes and teal skin that would rise from the ocean from time to time. The watermelons didn’t know how to handle the situation, the only thing that kept the monster from attacking their island was a sacrifice every time they showed up.

Everytime she made the ground shake with her presence, the villagers would play a game of “not it” and the loser would be painted and decorated and presented to the beast to feast.

Guess who lost one of these times.

I knew what to do, we are taught the story of the sacrificial one, the baby melon of melon folklore, I had my chance to live in his example, to finally give myself for the village.

But I ran. I kept running. Even when i heard the screams of my fellow kin I kept running. I never got to find out what happened to my village, I found myself in the Omniverse soon after.

I met with my master, a man from a world of great oceans. When he realized what I was, he took me in, taught me to read and write. When I was finally able to communicate my story, he taught me his techniques, the art of Haki that made me far surpass the abilities of my race, but I’d trade it all for a chance to pay it back to my kind; a second chance I may never have.


As Guu stopped listening to her thoughts, she was silent. She turned to Melani to escape drama, but she guessed there was no escaping from it tonight.

“Well, I wouldn’t feel to bad. You were young, we always do things we regret when we are young.” The pink one reasoned, thinking of a whole host of things from her childhood as examples. “You can’t let that hold you back, you’re already an amazing melon.”

Guu sidled over to get closer so she can look her in the eyes. She looked almost to tears.

“Plus anyways you don’t know you’ll never get a second chance, this is the Omniverse, anything is possible. You’re a perfect example of that.”

The melon girl went in for a hug, which the princess reciprocated, just glad something went right tonight.


The pair would take turns sleeping. When morning came around, Guu woke up to the sound of Chuck packing up the gear, his back was facing the princess.

“Just for you knowledge, I’m glad you came along.” She said.

The demon froze, as if he had been caught in a crime. After a moment of silence, he simply said:

“Thank you.” He grunted out.

[Guu]

The group traversed the old bog. The place reeked of algae and filth. Insects were goddamned everywhere, some of them were a number of feet long. Dragonflies with 3-foot wing spans nearly topped over Chuck as it flew by. Guu lead up front, constantly scanning the area around her for any muk pools deeper than they could walk in. Some of them stretched down farther than her senses could reach.

One thing that didn’t help was the overall morale of the group. While Chuck was better than the night before, he was still brooding a little bit as he followed the group closely. Bani was not only upset about the night before, but was constantly slipping and sliding trying to walk on the unstable bog floor in high heels. Pitchen pretty much had to support her the entire way through with his air techniques. The only one with a sunny disposition was Melani.

While Guu could guide them through the swamp, she had no idea if they were even heading the right direction. Scott was the navigation guy and he was too angst-ridden to take up the job. At this point, she was hoping for ambush just to know she was at least going the right way.

Careful what you wish for.

Suddenly, fifty men in ironic t-shirts popped out from the brush and twisted trees. They surrounded the group, pink and purple painted mallets raised.

Part of the circle breaks to reveal a familiar face: Luke the astronaut, carrying a yellow Star Piece in his palm.

“Wait, you already found it?” Guu inquired.

“Hahaha, you think I didn’t have copies of my research? It’s the digital age for fucks sake!”

“But if you had it, why bother with me?”

“For revenge silly! You thought I’d just leave you empty handed with just a bounty to answer to?” He said, making a deep laugh that seemed somewhere between ironic and sincere before switching to a stern face. “No, I personally wanted to deal retribution to you. You made it personal.”

“You’re an idiot.” Bluntly stated Guu.

“You’re a monster.” Stated Luke with a grin. “Kill them.”

All fifty of them ganged up on the five, swinging away with their hammers. Chuck was immediately pummeled, unable to grab a potion in time. Bani tried to dodge but the hammers were too many and she got her body riddled with marks and bruises. Melanie managed to withstand the hits, but she couldn’t move, trying to not to take damage from the hammers took all of her focus, causing her to just lie on the ground as she was hit repeatedly. Pitchen was just hammered hard by the horde, his metallic arm started to shatter into pieces as it took too much of the barrage.

Twenty of the men devoted themselves to Guu. They all ganged on her, hammer her with mallets. The first set got in as she couldn’t get her powers activated in time, but she quickly separated into goop, allowing them to pound her into mush.

“Don’t let her fool you, hit her until you have nothing left!”

Guu couldn’t manage this state for long as it continued to drain her energy. She dashed into the sky, slipping through the hands of dozens of men. As soon as she’s out of their reach, she re-solidified and flew higher, hoping to at least get a moment to plan out a strategy.

BAAAZAAANG!

She felt the attack before it hit her: an energy weapon that one of the guards was carrying hit her dead on. She toppled to the ground, hitting it with a thud. A larger chunk of her body was scorched. An arm could no longer function.

Luke walked up to Guu and laughed.

“Finally, it’s the end of Princess Guu.” He said as he held a banishing circle in his other hand. He held it in the air, ready to toss it down at the pink one. “Farewell, you monster.”

Then suddenly, Luke was eaten by a t-rex.

[Guu]

While was everyone was distracted by the ensuing battle, a mummified undead prehistoric lizard had stumbled out of a nearby bog pool and swallowed Luke in one gulp. The fifty guards saw the T-rex and over half of them immediately booked it the opposite direction leaving behind whatever of Guu’s friends they were fighting. The other twenty charged the giant dinosaur. Most started pounding away with hammers down by the feet, some jumped on the rex’s back, tearing at his flesh with their teeth. One guy got up close and aimed his energy rifle.

The reptile did one swing of his body and it sent guards flying everywhere, some falling into the bog and sinking towards their deaths. The remaining guards felt outmatched and decided to run for their lives as well, as a few get picked off by the beast as they ran.

Guu considered running herself, she figured the Star Piece maybe safe inside the beast’s stomach. Her mind was conflicted though as she wasn’t sure if the thing would eventually go through the lizard’s digestive system.

However, her choice was made for her as the t-rex eyed up Bani who was lying unconscious nearby. Without a thought, the pink one stood between them.

“Don’t even think about it, bucko.” She said, menace in her voice.

She launched a punch right into the creature’s face. It barely even budged.

“We’ll cra-”

The creature whipped its tail, sending Guu sailing into a nearby tree. A large number of her bones were broken, she focused on moving them around to less inconvenient spots. One of her arms were still useless, she couldn’t move it at all with the scorch mark encompassing that part of the body.

With the pink enigma fixing her body, Melani was the only one conscious to fight. She approached the dino and threw a single flying punch into the monster’s belly. It yelped in pain as it received the full force of her haki and stumbled backwards. However, it quickly shook itself and regained it’s composure. It stepped forward quickly and bit down on the melon. She quickly put up her defenses, but she could feel it caving under those powerful jaws. In a split second, she sent a punch into the roof of the beast’s mouth which caused it to shoot it’s jaw open. The melon fell to the ground. She managed to protect herself from the impact, but she was winded. This brief moment was enough for the rex to approach once more.

However, before he could eat the melon girl, Chuck threw himself in the path. Bloodied and beaten, he stood up and gave the dino a glare.

“You’re not eating anyone today!”

The dino, confused by the lack of survival instinct of the demon, swallowed him whole.

“Chuck!” Yelled Guu.

She took the air and jettisoned herself directed at the monster’s face. Once again, he recoiled in surprise. As soon as his mouth opened once more, she threw herself down his mouth and down his throat.

Half way down his esophagus, she expanded her mid-section so she got caught in the beast’s throat. She psychically called out for Chuck.

“Chuck! Please tell me you are alive!” She thought, not even hiding her concern.

Suddenly, he appeared on her senses, she quickly went to read his mind.

“Guu! I managed to grab the star piece off that Luke guy, pull me up!” He thought to her.

She could sense his arm outstretched, ready to grab. The yellow piece in the palm of the other hand. Guu stretched an arm out, but as soon as she could get a hand out there, his didn’t exist anymore. Her senses showed his arm had almost completely dissolved away.

“The acid worked faster than I thought.” He relayed to her.

She could sense his other arm dissolve away as well, dropping the star piece back down deeper into the stomach.

“I’m sorry, I guess I was useless to you in the end.”

“Chuck!”

Seconds later, the rex was able to violent spit Guu out who landed hard on the ground. She tried to sense her demonic friend but there was nothing; no life signs of him whatsoever. He was gone.

“Chuck...” She whimpered as she climbed to her feet, her body soaked in dinosaur saliva.

The monsters recomposed itself and looked down at the pink one, and air of rage in its glare.

“You’re going to die.” She said plainly, as her body quickly turned as black as the night sky.

[Guu]

Guu’s skin turned black and semi-translucent, her eyes turned glowing red, tentacles grew from her back. She knew what this form meant to her, but she didn’t care. If there was something deserving to see this form, it was this monster.

Immediately, she punched it hard in the belly, causing it to fall flat on its back from just the sheer recoil. She flew up in the air and started to punch him in the stomach repeatedly, the speed and force was like a jackhammer against its skin. It cried out in anguish, its wails rang through the entire bog.

Wanting to escape the onslaught, it kicked its legs against the ground, which was enough of a force to push itself back onto its feet. It stumbled forward as it tried to sense its target, but she had dissapeared. It looked around confused.

Guu was in a nearby brush. She aimed carefully with her arm. Then with a lightning quick snap, she did a stretchy punch that collided with the monster’s side. It flew a few yards, but it managed to land on its feet, a giant bruise where the impact happened.

The pink one focused again, aiming careful, and fired again. This time, it managed to snap around in time and clench its teeth on the flying arm.

It tried to bite through the arm, but she turned her arm into gel and slipped right through the crack. Then she solidified and wrapped the arm around one of the teeth, gave it a hard tug with all her might. In one pull, the teeth yanked out, the dino screamed in pain. Guu retracted her arm and took the tooth with one of her tentacles. She dashed forward in max speed and slashed its belly with its own tooth. The creature toppled over in pain, breathing heavily and wailing out again. Guu started to rapidly punch the dino in the face, switching between her single arm and her tentacles. She could feel bones shatter, she could feel teeth break, an eye eventually fell out. By the time she stopped, the creature was lying almost dead, barely moving on the ground.

Her form taken over completely, she moved down to the belly where she reached into the wound the tooth left. She pulled at it until it ripped apart, spilling the creatures guts all over the ground. The monster stopped moving.

Her body now satisfied, her form faded away and she returned to normal. She could barely remember what happened, but the beast’s guts all over the place was a good indicator. No sign of Chuck anywhere, he was surely gone. She looked around for her friends. Bani and Pitchen were still unconscious from the beating before, but Melani, she had a look of horror, one all too familiar to Guu. She wasn’t sure if the melon girl would ever see her the same way ever again.

She sighed sadly. It was a victory, one with heavy losses, but a victory nonetheless. She noticed the beast’s stomach had burst open. Bones, gore, and all sorts of stuff was pouring out, she didn’t want to imagine which parts were her friend.

She wasn’t sure if fate was rewarding her or mocking her, but along with the contents, the yellow star piece flowed out as well, rolling across the ground and stopping just before Guu’s feet.

Her quest was over.

[Guu]

Guu reached down to grab the Star Piece, but as it’s smooth surface touched her skin, she could feel her stomach drop. She immediately picked it up and inspected it.

Upon closer inspection, it was made of some cheap artificial material with some sort of internal mechanism keeping it lit. It looked like something you’d win as a prize at Chuck E. Cheeses.

Plastic, it was fucking plastic.

She fell to her knees, her mouth agape. Her head swirling a mile a minute making a nice purée of conflicting emotions. One part of her mind was in despair, unable to accept that their journey, their friend’s death, everything that had happened up to this point was entirely pointless.

Another part of her brain was contemplating, wondering if Luke had intentionally pulled the wool over their eyes or if he had been tricked into thinking this was the real one.

And the final part was still screaming about the missing arm

So many voices, so many trains of thought, she was frozen in place. She would be reminded of her first day in the Omniverse, those first few hours when she couldn’t think and move at the same time, but her nostalgia was staying in it’s hole, waiting out the storm.

She was so distracted that she didn’t notice Melani approaching. She had noticed Guu’s face and had moved in to see what was going on. She grabbed the piece from the princess’ grasp and immediately, she could feel the problem. The shock caused her to drop the fake piece to the ground.

As soon as the faux rock hit the grassy floor, Guu too fell. She couldn’t take the endless stream of emotions and chose to take a nap. She plopped hard on the ground as he her eyes became a dull blue.

Melanie, sensing her companion was still alive, moved herself, sitting against a nearby tree to work out her own mental thunderstorm.

Silence befell the old bog.

[Guu]

Hours pass. It didn’t take long until the Melon girl got out of her own head and went to task, wrapping the wounds of Pitchen and Bani with the med kit that had been stored in Guu’s stomach. The walking piece of fruit could only do so much of course, she was only patching them up enough to keep them stable. While most of Pitchen’s damage was to his robotic parts, Bani was covered from head to toe in cuts and bruises, it was a shock that she was even alive.

Guu couldn’t help out herself as she was just sitting around, waiting for her own wounds to heal. As she watched the fruit bandage up her comrads, she felt that lingering feeling that Chuck had felt up to his last moments; the cruel mistress that was self-loathing. She never knew it existed in her until now. Before she could convince herself of anything, living in denial of what she is, but now it was obvious as day.

Wanting anything to distract her from this feeling, she attempted to strike up a conversation.

“How are they going to get real medical treatment out here?” She asked. Suddenly, she realized how shitty it was that it took an attempt at small talk to ask about her friends’ eventual fates.

Melani didn’t even look up from her work, instead, she pulled out her phone, tapped something on the touch screen and went back to bandaging Bani. A sharp ringing sound came from Guu’s stomach. Pulling out her phone, she noticed that the fruit had forwarded her a text.

“The fire that was blocking the closest path has been cleared, so we will be sending a Medic and an Engineer along to aid you. Be there as soon as possible.”

Guu couldn’t believe it. It only took a day or so to clear the fire, meaning if they had just waited around, they would have gotten here the easy way anyways.

She couldn’t take anymore of this. She had to escape herself. She shut off her brain and went to sleep. It was the only thing she could do right now.

[Guu]

The nightmares she had that night were almost indescribable. Horrors of flesh wriggled in the empty void as they danced around in circles in the universe’s most twisted gala. She watched helplessly as one of the freakish dancers slaughter her friends. She could see Molly sliced down the middle, her innards splattering onto the the spectral dance floor. She could she Sylvia beheaded, her eyes rolling into the back of her head as the life escaped them. She could see Bani burning alive, her screams rang in her ears, echoing through the chambers of the pink one’s mind. Melani was being feasted on, devoured by large beasts. Her rinds took the form of blood and guts.

Amongst the carnage, only one creature was born, a dark little girl with tentacle little hands, with familiar, dull eyes.

The princess shook awake. Even her last refuge had betrayed her, or at least that’s how she felt. She felt like she could hurt herself, like she needed to be punished in some way. Luckily, she was already missing an arm, so she didn’t need to harm herself any further.

Longing to distract herself, she returned focus to her eyes, only to see the Melon girl sitting across from her on a tree stump, just glaring at her.

Guu’s phone buzzed in the nearby dirt. She must have forgotten to swallow her phone earlier. Reaching over, she peeked on to the screen to see what the fruity one had written.

“Explain to me what you are.” The text said.

Guu shot her a look, but only got the same glare in return. She figured the melon wanted an explaination for her dark form before.

Despite settling on her missing arm as a form of punishment, she guessed the rejection of the cute melon lady would also suffice for penance. She decided to be completely honest. She sat up, straightened herself out, and spoke.

“I am the daughter of Azathoth and the brain child of Nyarlathotep.” She began, speaking as if she were giving a history lesson. “My ‘family’ consists of four gods who are in charge of all things in the universe, Azathoth was their leader, but he, along with two other gods were mindless. They relied on Nyarlathotep to be their mind, their voice.

“Nyarlathotep however, loathed being bound to his duties of messenger. He wanted a puppet just like him, someone that could do his bidding without having to be constrained by the job. He had the outer gods create me.

“However, I was a rebellious girl, so I took off the first chance I got. I’ve been running ever since.”

Melani was silent as she thought about the princess’ words. Before today, she would have been fearful of anyone learning what she was, but now she deserved judgement, or at least she felt like she deserved it.

Eventually, Melani tore her gaze away from the princess and looked down at her phone. Tapping away at the digital keypad. Guu’s phone buzzed to life again where she snatched it up and peered down into it.

“I understand.” Written in the text.

Melani didn’t text another word, she leapt to her feet and motioned towards the bags, started to pull out fixins for a meal. Guu just sat in silence. She couldn’t even get the rejection she wanted. She guessed in the end, that was fitting.

[Guu]

The angst riddled princess had plenty of time to herself as she waited for her wounds to heal. Trying to at least stay productive, she expanded her senses to their limit, trying to pick up some sign of the star piece. Strange and ancient creatures inhabit the nearby bogs, prehistoric fish, some of them bigger than her, many built in a way that shouldn’t really be able to function without the interference of magic, but no sign of some powerful stone of any sort. She wasn’t sure if the piece had ever even been here to begin with.


On the plus side, she was glad to feel the continued heartbeats of Bani and Pitchen. If Melanie hadn’t been able to withstand the main assault, she doubted she could muster the strength to save the rest of the party herself. The melon really proved her usefulness to the team, she was truly the hero today.


A few more hours into Guu’s recovery and the reinforcements that Melanie called earlier arrived. It was two men and one woman.


One was a large robust man wearing a gi loosely around his body, the front of his coat open to expose his thick haired chest. His thick mustache and bedroom gaze gave the man a look that was crossed with a sexy masseur and a gay porn actor. His leggings were tights, which lovingly outlined his junk for everyone to see.


The second was a short, stout, wrinkly old man in a hakama. His eyes were dull and did not look towards any of the nearby party. Upon closer inspection, his eyes were clearly made of wood.


The final one dressed in a traditional Kimono. Despite the japanese clothing, she was quite clearly not asian, instead being caucasian with flowing frizzled brown hair that reached down to her ankles.


The old man turned his head to face the princess and bowed.


“Greetings your highness.” Stated the elderly man politely, his voice musky and deep. He shot glances at the other two who immediately moved towards Bani and Pitchen respectively, pulling open their medical bags. “I am Dr. Talkin Bauss, and those are my associates, Geno Rex and Jenny McCarthy.”


“Thanks for coming at such short notice.” Said Guu as she watched the other two.


“It’s our job after all.” The old man stated bluntly as he knelt down to inspect Guu’s wounds.


Geno chose to treat Bani, he gently massaged her wounds with his big bulky hands.


“Don’t worry, Rex has got ya babe.” He said, his accent almost austrian in nature but with a heavy mixture of American, enough to shed doubt of it’s authenticity.


Jenny went for Pitchen, who immediately started assembling a blow torch.


“Thankfully a lot of the pieces are still here.” She said with a smirk. Guu wondered the safety of handling such equipment when you have so much hair, but she was too distracted by her own doctor.


The old man’s eyes swiveled around aimlessly, but the princess somehow knew the old man was checking her over.


“Not quite human are ye?” He asked in jest.
 
“How can you tell?” Asked the pink one, sarcastically.

[Gildarts]

Coal and soot cluttered around every nook and corner of his being, while rebellion consumed his mind. The serpentine whispered her temptation, cackling at the human’s frivolously tedious whim.

Oh? You’re going back home? What a good idea, I can’t wait to meet your family, those you hold near and dear, the juicy taste of your heartbreak when you watch through your own eyes as you kill them will just be so... De-lec-table...

Gildarts was not unnerved by this creature’s feeble threats, he’d had his share of fear his entire life, and yes, most of it was of himself. If anyone was strong enough to combat the sweet sickness of doubt and temptation, it was this mage.

What’s the matter? Still not talking? It’s awfully lonely up in this head of yours, and so very dull, empty rattling, that’s what you hear in here, and the echo of my voice, now, if you’d just fill it with a little thought, I could be entertained and grab some popcorn...

Ears poked out from Gildarts’ shoulder and perched upon his cape, she looked dusty, and no matter how much licking, the kitten couldn’t manage to get the smoky smudges from her pelt. “Gildarts, where are we going?”

Ah, a much needed distraction, you’ll need it too, I don’t have a mouth but I can surely pretend to make the sound you’ll hear of the cracking of this being’s little ne-

“We’re going to the Tangled Green, past Ambrosia, Princess Guu is in need of some help,” the Fairytail wizard’s gruff voice pronounced.

“Curt, as always, you know, you could live a little, and speak a little? Annd you must be telepathic, or you figured out how to email people, as if by some miracle,” the exceed pouted and looked around as they left the drab climate behind them, “At least we’re getting out of here, this is... One strange place we’ve ended up. We’re so far from home, I wake up in a desert, follow you to this giant forest, and then almost get eaten by a volcano dragon! GODS! It’s simply exhausting.”

Yess, do share those secrets that the mage has hidden and bottled up, key and lock. You know, Crash Magic Mage, I’m not so bad. I think we’ve gotten off on the wrong foot, I think you think all I want is death, but as I have said before, there’s something even better, so rich and fulfilling. Power. Death just happens to be a... Slight consequence. Death isn’t permanent you know, it is only a state of mind. Some people even choose to-

A simple flex of his eyebrow conveyed the Prime’s annoyance, yet, the malefactor sprang with glee, Ah, I knew i was getting through to you, see, we’ll get rid of the runt, and then we’ll-

He cleared his throat, “After spending so much time there, I’m very thirsty, all that smoke and ash, speaking of which,” he extended his organic hand and polished off a little soot from the cat’s ear, “You missed a spot.”

The exceed purred with delight, and smirked, “I’d help you, but you’re pretty much covered, your hair is even black, which looks kinnnnd of weird on you.”

Gildarts blinked, and then burst out in laughter, his back fell free in order to receive more air, and the joy bubbled up in his stomach and rolled off his tongue. It was a well-needed laugh, that lightened the mood, even while a dear friend could be in peril; the last thing on Gildarts’ mind was whether or not his hair looked good. It seemed to keep his demon at bay, for now.

The entrance to the wondrous forest was as grand as always, a single footstep bringing the mage one step closer to helping his guild’s leader, and suddenly, he was immersed in dense emerald green. The scent was thick and full of all sorts of lush life, pine lingered in one nostril and out the other, causing Gildarts’ noise to twitch and shiver.

“Oh boy,” she squeaked, “You aren’t going to sneeze, are you? I swear! Every time you come to this verse you-”

A loud, clamorous burst of air shook through the forest, silencing most creatures to a fearful look over their shoulder, all around that they could see, while birds and flying animals flocked to the skies, alerted and shaken by this surprised, unnatural occurrence.

“YIKES!” Piqui purred, “You should settle down and be a lumberjack, cause you’ll take down this whole forest with another one of those!”

The Prime sniffled and wiggled his nose once more, “Maybe it was the soot?”

“Doubt it, you’ve been covered in that for a couple of days, don’t you ever shower?” Piqui blinked, “Or do Primes not have to?”

Gildarts shrugged and raised an eyebrow, “I can’t take the time to shower if Guu is in a fight for her life, certain priorities must be upheld for the sake of comradeship.”

Yes, those priorities, go on, share.. The Malefactor reminded him it was still listening with the eerie slurp of her tongue, And while your at it, tell me, of what do you fear most? The death of your friends, or to become their murderer?

Gildarts refrained from cringing, but allowed himself a single gulp. His brown eyes showed no digression, nor hinted at weakness, yet behind the mask, the serpent continued to coil curiously around the subtle pings about his mind as a psychologist might find the deeply embedded quirks that assert to one’s developed habits and behavior.
Cute. the voice said with satisfaction, and let him be.

Piqui had been speaking for a long three minutes, on how a good shower had never hurt anyone, but had marveled in the fact that Gildarts’ legs kept moving so very sternly, over the lightly treaded path that wove throughout the woodlands.

“-And then, when you get wet, the water helps wash away the dirt! Especially with you humans, you don’t have such purrfect tongues as ours, which help us comb through our fur rather than wash a smooth surface like your nonexistent fur, better known as baldness.” It seemed she had concluded, or paused to catch her breath, and Gildarts gleaned away from her, slowing his stride.

“What? What is it?!” Piqui’s eyes darted around the forest, looking for the dark shadows within the corners, but seeking the truth only to make the doubts free.

Gildarts emanated silence, and it spread to her, and seemed to cast itself, spreading throughout the forest. The lull remained. The source of his alarm remain unearthed. Air seemed tight. Their lungs, tighter.

Hesitation, trepidation, came with no emancipation, creeping from the furthest points in the forest, with no source of origin, yet now, shadows as though cast by midnight, surrounded them. Gildarts let his eyes adjust, while Piqui shivered on his shoulder. The one thing the Prime had going for him, was his own camouflage, for he was covered in his own kind of black disguise.

A voice boomed, from overhead, echoing about the trees and rattling nearly every quivering leaf, “Who goes there?”

Piqui gulped, Gildarts didn’t hesitate, his lips parted, ready for a stern reply, until interrupted by the omnipresent voice again, “Just because I can’t see you, doesn’t mean I can’t smell you. There are two of you, one much taller than the other, yet both equal, despite a significance in age. You are a well known mage, and she, a little kitten who may as well be a stray. And a last being, one so evil it cannot form a shape, haunts you as a phantom in your mind. One, a mortal, the other, immortal, and the last, is something different altogether. Each of you have chosen the wrong path, for your goal is the Bog. Each of you are welcome in my kingdom, to take the shortest of cuts, however, I daresay, no, I dare enquire, I must deem that you state your names, for if I ever have to curse your bones, and children to come, I shall have a name to say as I spat upon the ground. So, what say you? Do you dare enter my kingdom chasing stealth? Or will you make me go to immediate ends to punish you, much more severely for your insubordination?”

Piqui’s eyes had widened, and were mainly the only thing showing in the darkness, aside from the white’s of Gildarts’ own. Her fear had shattered all bounds, and she hid the best she could in his satchel, while the mage pronounced, “My name is Gildarts Clive, I do not know you, nor of you, or your kingdom, but I humbly request passage.”

“Gildarts Clive you say?” the voice seemed to dissolve into a small thunderous rumble, “And what be the creature that you are hiding, what is her name?”

“Piqui, we are both members of Ambrosia, I am trying to get to our leader, she is in danger and has lost an arm,” the Prime stated to the cloudy entity.

“Yes, yes, I know this, but you are mistaken, what is her name,” the accusation in the apparition's voice felt like it was pointing a finger right into his mind. Gildarts blinked, and his eyes fell down to Piqui, who’s nose poked out of the bag at the sound of her name. She couldn’t know, and yet, now, the truth seemed like the only option.

“And if I tell you, you won’t harm us?” Gildarts inquired with narrowed eyes, slits like a snake around his charcoal shadow.

“Yes, as long as you obey the laws of my land, which, as you may have guessed, require you to leave her behind. She slithers deception, and chains a man to hatred. I must have a promise of civility, and most of all, no death, as you pass through my land.”

The all mighty voice had spoken.

Upon being called, Gildarts could feel the Malefactor churn, as some parasite within his mind, as though the darkness that had come was calling to it for its own desires, yet, the Malefactor was a worm rooted deeply within his mind. It avoided the grasp of the nameless being, and Gildarts allowed it.

“You have my word I will not cause chaos, nor death, as I use your land to travel,” the mage stated sternly.

“But do I have hers?” the voice seemed to know much more than Gildarts, and yet, Piqui’s presence wouldn’t let Gildarts admit it.

Meanwhile, the cat growled, “I’m right here, and yes, I’ll promise! You already have my name, and can curse my children! Now just leave us alone! Gildarts, we can turn back, is Guu really in so much trouble that she needs this detour to save us two days?”

[i]Well Prime? What’ll it be, how are you going to get me to promise that? This shadow will know if you lie, for he knows nearly all. Trust me, he can’t hear me, but he will know. What’ll it be? Can I get an hour in your itty bitty meat-suit? Maybe you’d barter me down, like a good salesman, for ten minutes? Ahh I see that flinching doubt, because you know I only need one minute to break every bone in your body, as well as many bones in theirs. How important is this, Guu to you? Hahaha, that is what I like to see, that squirming within you, that deep contemplation of choice and deliberation. You forget to keep your guard up, and you let me sink my fangs right in. Don’t worry, call this an act of good faith, I’ll promise to be good in His land, for free, because when I’m free and you’re caged as I am, you’ll get no such promises.”

“Yes,” Gildarts acknowledged, the looming voice, and Piqui. “Yes, now we have to go.”

“Not so fast,” the voice growled, and grew closer, Gildarts stood face-to-face with the darkness, “The cat creature, send her home to Ambrosia. Let her be with the small girl. This is not a toll, as your promise, but a suggestion, for you, Gildarts Clive, know not what you are walking into, if it can take your leader’s arm, do not endanger your mortal pet on needless whims. Merely advice. You are free to go, Gildarts, but remember I remain here, for when you return.”

[Guu]

Guu was surfing the web with her one good arm. She knew she could stow away her bad arm somewhere on her body and make a new one by shape shifting her liver, but that seemed like a waste of energy considering she could just give her remaining hand ten fingers. The other ninja tried to focus on their duty of liberally applying healing magic on the princess’ unconscious comrades, trying desperately to ignore the sight of Guu’s fingers unnaturally twist in odd angles in order to use the phone more efficiently. Her eyes barely widen when she got a reply back from her guild mate.


“Just to let you know, my boyfriend maybe coming by to help.” The pink one said casually to the group.


“Oh my!” Said the older ninja as he approached the enigma, trying desperately not to look at her hand. “To think someone so young would have a lover! Who is the the lucky young lad?”


“Gildarts Clive.” She said. “Also, not sure if you can call a 40-year-old a ‘young lad,’ that’s kind of weird.”


The older ninja’s faux smile twisted into an honest scowl. He walked back to treat the rest of the group, hoping to the heavens that his time working with the Princess is soon to its end.

[Gildarts]

Gildarts felt his nose tickle, as though someone was talking about him, but he had no way of knowing he was being called ‘a young lad’ from afar. How could he? For he was miles apart from those, separated by the ivy, monster-filled forest of the Tangled Green.

Gildarts announced, “Piqui, we’re here.”

The cat looked around, there was no murk from any sort of bog in sight, “I don’t see Guu.”

“We’re at Ambrosia, I figured it’d be a good time to check on Molly, since we’re on our way,” Gildarts stated calmly.

“You’re... Taking that scary thing’s advice aren’t you?” Piqui squeaked.

Gildarts looked into the cat’s eyes, who happened to be poking around on the ground, and nodded, “It’s too dangerous, and I don’t want to lose you,” the Prime knelt to the ground and gave the cat a good pet, “Go find Molly, and RSVP for her party, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I just don’t appreciate being dumped off at the entrance of the vil...” the cat looked up, and Gildarts was iconically gone, “-lage. Tch, typical.”

Upon the descending silence, the Malefactor perked its ears up and if it had a face, it would’ve been smirking. So you’ve abandoned the cat, have you? Does that mean you’re willing to be alone with me now? You know when we’re alone, I can easily steal your seeecrets. My, my, yours are all clumped together, held in a wrought-iron cage, shackling you. Wouldn’t you like to be free someday? Aw... Don’t be like that, I hate it when you don’t acknowledge I’m here. It’s lonely, and the worst thing you can do to any living thing.

Gildarts executed his elaborate and yet simple mental fortitude, resisting the parasite in his mind, for he knew she would steadily grow, double, and quadruple in size if he fed her any bits and pieces of information, especially that of himself. The silence was the answer, and if he wasn’t, the Malefactor, and the burden it carried, would get a whole lot heavier.

Strolling through the forest, the Prime, though not tech savvy, referenced his map. He did not so forwardly come up with this solution but looked down to find ‘magic’ map had appeared in his satchel not long ago. It was very useful. The Tangled Green had coiling paths that traversed with zig-zags and scribbles all over the map, still, his path illuminated with a glow that brightened a streak in the rolled parchment, and since he knew he was going to the Bog, a dark corner of sketch on the map, it wasn’t too hard to get there with a guideline.

Gildarts’ legs, metal or not, had carried him there. The outskirts of the Bog, a damp stench and eager heat boiled off this dreadful part of swamp. Vines hung lowly from the trees and drenched the would-be blue sky in trails of thick darkness. The Malefactor awoke at the macabre environment, relishing it.

Well, isn’t this perfect, we’ve arrived! Now, where is the damsel you will be saving? I wonder, is she already dead? Were you too late? You wouldn’t have been, not with me in command, imagine it, seconds. And you choose to be the hero? Just what fun is that?

The serpent waited for her reply, and grew disheartened when Gildarts paid her no mind. In the distance, a small figure wearing bright colors shone out of the drenching darkness of the swamp. The Fairytail mage took another step in that direction.

[Guu]

Guu had felt the presence of the mage approaching within the edge of her senses. Deciding what to say, she did a full insight diagnostic on him just to see what’s changed. She was genuinely impressed by the number of things he added since she last met him back in Camelot. Super Speed, Survival, he’s really grown as a prime. In the real world, it would take an act of god for a mere human to change so much over such a short amount of time, though admittedly, that’s literally true here, too.


She wondered what the Malefactor thing was in his inventory, but she decided to take that while it comes. Got to leave some secrets.


She couldn’t decide if she should straighten herself out or intentionally make her clothes more raggedy just to play up the danger she has been, as the last twenty-four hours has already allowed her to fully heal, this was even down to her wardrobe apparently. The choice was basically made for her as the wizard noticed her and started running up. Honesty it was then.


“Guu! I’m glad to see you alright!” He yelled out relieved


“Yeah, you just caught me when I finished healing up.” She starts swinging her formally bitten off arm around in an attempt to look like she’s doing stretches. “I liked the old arm better, but I guess I just have to break it in.”


“So you are all fine?”


“Yeah, thanks to Omnilium. Unfortunate I can’t say the same for secondaries.” She looked over to her companions, the girl in a playboy bunny still had bruises on every inch of her body, the cybernetic moogle was no where near having his arm untwisted into a knot. “We took on an army, then a zombie t-rex, and we even lost someone along the way, but the treasure wound up being a bust.”


Is this really the Guu you were seeking? Spoke out Malefactor with a mischievous chuckle. She’s just a little girl! You were in just as bad a position as you were with the cat!


‘Oh, I see you have a stow away there, Gildarts.’ Guu thought, which rang in the mage’s head. Malefactor’s cackling halted.


Wait, she can hear me? Continued the slime, a mix of alarm, disbelief, and jubilation in her voice.


‘Telepath trolling is a tad intense. It’s an insult to the art to even call it trolling. I’d suggest you halt your attack now, you wouldn’t want to know what I could do to you.’


You have no idea what you’re messing with child.


“Neither do you.” Guu said out loud, making it uncertain who she’s actually talking too.


To the rest of the group, the two were just standing there glaring at each other for several minutes. If they hadn’t had to tolerate the Princess for the last hours, they’d be actually reacting, but instead, they kept their head down, hoping the new stranger was here to take her somewhere else.


Gildarts however was horrified. His guild leader had already discovered his greatest secret within minutes into their reunion! He couldn’t help but feel a twinge of of uncertainty, his brow pushing further up towards his scalp than usual


And this was all Malefactor needed. Noticing his host’s weakened defenses, she immediately moved in to invade Gildart’s mind.


You’re secrets, they are finally mine! She said, laughing maniacally.


Gildarts winced, he knew he had screwed up. All his work to keep the beast out was all for naught because of his momentary expression of emotion. He quickly tried to shield himself mentally from the oncoming attack, but all he could do was brace himself for the inevitable.


However, the attack didn’t come. All there was in his head was silence.


“Sounded like she was doing something damaging, so I psychically sent her an image of cthulhu's face and now she’s unconscious. Enjoy the reprieve, it’ll only be brief.”


The slime’s frustrated voice rang out in the hollowed corners of the red-head’s mind.


“Oh, too late, she’ back.”


She attempted her attack again, but that moment was all the mage needed to get his defenses back up. She growled in fury.


I see you’re going to be a thorn in my side, how annoying!


‘You’re not really in the position to criticize people for that.’


Don’t worry, little girl, I know your game now, it’ll only be a matter of time. I’ll be watching.


Malefactor went silent. The pair was silent for the longest time, 


“So anyways,” continued the princess, pretending the last few minutes never happened, “the fake artifact that I discovered has the logo of a local casino printed on it. In honor of my Injured friends, I’m going to at least look into it. You can come if you like, but only if you want to.”


Guu started to walk away, but then she twisted around and stretched her legs until her torso was level with the mage’s chest, she gives him a hug which held rather precariously around the back of his neck.


“It’s good to see you again. Thank you for coming...”

[Guu]

Not far from where our heroes lay, a tiny bird overheard their conversation. Once the subject of a casino came into its concave ears, it took off into the sky, where it was immediately eaten by a hawk, which is immediately eaten for a pterodactyl.


The dinosaur jets across the Tangled Green, over the mountains that surround the bog and through the endless wood. Eventually, the dactyl flies by the roof of a large casino where it is immediately eaten by a jumping shark. Shark burps in morse code which is immediately decoded by trollgirl in a magician's outfit. Upon deciphering the text, she immediately darts across the luxurious balcony and into a large ornate bedroom.


It was stocked to the brim with all the private amenities, everything from the gem encrusted bouday to the gold plated grandfather clock with caviar dispenser function. The centerpiece of the room is a giant king sized bed shaped like a heart. It’s clear the bed was built to split in two to form two broken hearts. Lying on the cushions were about twelve men, each one blissfully sleeping, each one built like a bull. In the dead center of these men is a young woman in her late 20s, red hair, flashily dressed considering she was in her night clothing.


The trollgirl strolled up besides the bed and slammed a fist in a giant red button. Suddenly, all the men wake at once, forming an acrobatic pose as they each lift up the young girl, allowing her to wake majestically on the hands of a dozen men. She stretched and yawned as she climbed to her feet, stepping across the open hands and onto a flight of stairs, built specifically to get down from the height.


She finally made it to the mammoth skinned rug that adorned the floor underneath. She stepped around the bed, undressing and preparing her work uniform. The twelve men quickly turned their heads away, they’ve been trained to value their master’s privacy more than their own lives.


Finally, after twenty minutes of just getting out of bed and getting dressed, the woman finally approached the trollgirl, who’s been waiting patiently this entire time.


“What do you have for me, Lydia?” She inquired, barely even trying to sound interested.


“The one called Guu, she has learned of your theft of the artefact.” Began the troll, nervously spouting out the words. “She has discovered we are responsible, she’ll be coming here!”


“Excellent news!” She said, sounding a bit more overjoyed this time.


“But milady, this Guu might attempt to kill you.”


“I want her too.” Said the woman casually. “Do not fear my safety Lydia. All things considered, you should be fearing their’s.”


Putting on the last of her earrings, she stood up straight, spread her arms and legs apart.


“Well, how does my outfit look!”


The trollgirl, despite every ounce of her will power, cocked an eyebrow.


“Milady, you’re entirely naked.”


“Haha, I was testing the loyalty of my reverse harem. And guess what?” She approached one of the men who in a pose that looked like he was trying to do a dog paddle in the air. “This one peeked! We all know what that means!”


She grabbed the man by the neck and dragged him into the next room where another king sized bed waits, this one has chains attached to the walls.


“No, milady please!” Screamed the man as his half naked ass rubbed the floor. “Anything but the humping room! For the love of god, no! Please!”


She slammed the door behind her. The other eleven men bow their heads mournfully, as the victim's screams rang out into the early morning. Penalty by fornication was the most feared punishment that a man slave of the casino can endure. They sing a woeful song for their pitiful comrade; an acapella cover of Barry White.

[Guu]

Guu and Gildarts transversed the beaten trail through the mountains and continued on passed where the great Power Rangers battle place, the one that probably contributed heavily in the failure of this quest the first time. Considering no lasting damage still remained, Guu questioned if that shitty part of the story was a collective hallucination.


After a number of hours by Chocobo back, they arrive at a small village. It was built into a boardwalk that was parallel to a river. Steam boats are seen moving in and out from the town, coming in to port, bringing on new cargo and passengers to bring down the river.


“According to my info, the casino is intentionally built into the thickest part of the jungle.” Guu explain, flicking through her phone while the chocobo under kept moving towards their destination. “The easiest way to get there is by boat.”


They walk up to the ticket booths for the ferries. They get in the back of the line which is clearly over twenty-five people. Through all the head, Gildarts could catch a glimpse of the clerk solo running the booth, an elderly fellow; he was literally a giant snail.


“Princess, no need for both of us to wait in line, why do you go look arou-”


But when he looked down, the Pink Enigma was already gone. Before he could process the sudden absence of his fearless leader, a giant tortoise woman took the spot behind him. The smell of her perfume was the distinct smell of vanilla mixed with dog shit. The aroma nearly knocked the mage off his feet.






While Guu was walking down the boardwalk, she took in everything with her senses. Most of the shops were touristy in nature, t-shirts, random knicknacks, it was clear the place made it’s money entirely through travellers wanting to use the steam boats. She had a laugh at the t-shirts put up on display: “I survived the Tangled,” “I <3 Ambrosia,” “My Best Friend is a Ninja,” “Guu is best Princess” to name a few.


The citizens come in a varied range of races and species, both in animal people and of the bland human variety. Some wore clothes from centuries past while some wore space armor. The massive amounts of variety gave her a nostalgia trip Ambrosia.


Though, as she was looking around, she couldn’t help notice the number of eyes on her. It took her a moment to remember that she was basically a celebrity in the Tangled, she figured that, for them, this is like some famous rock star suddenly showing up in your home town.


She should really consider wearing a disguise next time she enters a new town.


As she parted her way through the crowd, she couldn’t help here the murmurs of the people, uncertain if they should approach the pink one or not. Before she could eventually be ambushed, she flew up twenty feet up into the air, causing a number of people to gasp in shock. I couple even fell over backwards at the sight.


Her nostalgia soured by the rather rude onlookers, she decided to get back to business. She flew to the nearest tavern, a saloon called “Saloon.” It was around this point she realized that none of the shops had any real names. She saw “Burger Place,” “Clothes Store,” ”Soup Store,” and even “Hair Fixer Thingamabob.”


She stepped into the saloon, the place had a fresh wood smell, as if it was brand new. Outside of a few tables and chairs, the place was barely furnished, the bar wasn’t even stocked. It was clearly barren. Upon inside, she saw, a sign hanging on the wall that read: ”No drinking on the job whatsoever!”


Curiosity peaked, she tapped into her senses and paid attention to the other shops. Random people would walk into a shop, look around and leave without buying. Just over and over, sometimes the same person would go into the same shop, and their movements almost felt choreographed.


She walked towards the bar, she could sense something on the countertop. Flying up and onto a stool, she looked down at the object.


It was 100 pages, all clipped together with metal devices. The front cover read “Guu’s Visit to a Mysterious Town by The Mistress”


She opened it up somewhere early on in the book and read a random exert.

Suddenly, a large man with a bushy brown mustache and messy comb over popped up from behind the bar. Guu is thrown back in surprise as the man speaks in a boisterous tone.

BARTENDER

I’m sorry for being late, you’ve arrived quite early! Care for a drink my princess?

Suddenly, a large man with a bushy brown mustache and a messy comb over popped up from behind the bar. Guu is thrown back in surprise as the man speaks in a boisterous tone.


“I’m sorry for being late, you’ve arrive quite early! Care for a drink my princess?” He asked, his a grin a mile wide.


Guu had enough of this, she flew out of there in a dash, nearly breaking the doors of the hinges. Didn’t take her long to run into Gildarts.


“Oh! Princess!” He called out, waving the tickets in the air. “The old man snail didn’t take as long as I-”


Guu picked him up as she flew directly for the next steam boat.


“Woah, what’s the matter Guu?”


“We were expected,” said the princess, so matter of factly. “Let’s skip the script and set off the trap right away.”


“What do you mean?” Asked the mage, but he didn’t get a direct answer, Guu gave him the script. He opened it to the first page, which described them getting to town and their entire exchange with the ticket booth.


“Everyone here are paid actors to trick us to get on the boat.” Explained the pink one.


“And we’re getting on the boat anyways?”


“Yep.” She said. “Fighting our way off the boat is way easier than fighting our way through the jungle. But I’d rather skip the theater show.”

[Gildarts]

Adventure, it set in the course of his veins and sprung forth at every challenge. With Guu by his side, not much seemed to have changed but there was a taste in the air of something coming, something neither of them could quite see. The Malefactor wrestled with Gildarts consciously and subconsciously, making him more absent than normal, while challenges approached with heavy footsteps, and were stomped down by the princess herself. Well, at least the trick part.

Guu warned Gildarts of the trap, that they were expected, and that this whole town was in on the con to take them out. A boat, or rather, ferry, had been mounted on by the duo, and Gildarts seemed unnerved, by the water, by the unsteady gears shifting in the engines, by the noises of ship and the overhead blue sky that appeared to be descending on their shoulders. A gulp formed in his throat, and the Malefactor stunk up his mind with clouds of negativity, in response, Gildarts focused on the lucid action that was going on around him. A smart-looking woman in a business attire sat next to the two primes, trying not to look up at them too much through her square frames. She coughed. Guu eyed her, already reading what she was going to say through the glasses that accentuated her eyes.

Gildarts however, heard the words afresh, “Hi there, have ever been to this town before?”

Gildarts blinked, the question was directed at him and not Guu, “Uh, no...” the mage replied in an almost monotone, perhaps he was ‘acting’ too, but this was not his idea of fun.

“Oh! Me neither, I’m here on business, but my conference is tomorrow, I’m excited to see the town, and... Oh, is that your daughter?” she inspected Guu with an antagonistic gaze.

Gildarts, had he been drinking water, could’ve spit it all over this woman’s squeaky looking shoes, “Oh uh, no...” He was careful not to offer up any free information, though by what Guu had said previously, they probably knew it all.

“Then who is she?” she pried, waiting for conversation, as though it was her next cue in the part of this show they were putting on.

“That’s... None of your business?” Gildarts said, or rather asked, as he looked down to Guu for her expertise in these situations. Gildarts preferred blunt challenges, these tricks were not his forte, and nor were they his taste. This showed on his face with the clench of his jaw and the tenseness of skin above his brows.

The woman edged closer now, inches away. The scene spiraled around in the forefront of Gildarts’ mind, and he analyzed every stitch that surrounded him. The Ferry was open to the sky, they were on the main deck, and it wasn’t too far from the town that was their destination. The boat was sizable, but no cruise ship, like Gildarts had once been promised, two Omni years ago. Now, he was standing in the sun, basking in it, almost, while he felt the turmoil surround him, and his instincts began to kick in and thrive. The boat chugged to a gentle and seamless halt, someone yelled “Just a little engine trouble, we’ll be up in a few moments!” While other people, instead of panicking or looking aggravated, for having to delay their day plans, looked more focused than ever.

Slowly but surely, eyes began to follow the two people on the boat who had no script, but were expected to improvise. Guu was good at it, and made a quick remark at the same time as a knowing smile formed on her adorable lips, “Oh, Gildarts, I guess this is our cue!”

Gildarts straightened his stance, dropped a little lower to the ground, and within a blink, they were surrounded. Like some of the best fighting movies of all time, Guu and Gil were back to back, against the enemies who they were more than ready to face.