Move Creation Workshop

[Dane Regan]

@13:
They might be under the same page in the source book, but this is the Omniverse. You can make them different moves. Each discipline is different and unrelated. Yes, each is a "Psykana Discipline" but that's not preventing you from splitting it up. It would do the exact same thing as multiple moves as it would as just one.

If you prefer, you could start the name of each move like "Psykana Discipline: Psychic Barrier". But, there's no reason they all need to be together. Split it up.

@Reece: It's not that a move is almost as large as Ebony's. You know that. There's a difference between having a gun with multiple fire modes, even if the number of modes might seem excessive, and having a shield, blasts, assorted debuffs, and the like all under the same move. I can't make Elemental Blast multiple moves, because the variants affect each other.

[James Knight]

I was doing it like that to give the shields a weakness, Daniel. And really combining them wouldn't fit how I ICly planned to use them. Very well though. 

NFL-R App - Arms Factory (1200, Physical Strength, Debuff, Area Attack, Area Shield, Homing, Ranged Proficiency, Remote Control Prof.): 

Warren taps a button on his wrist and within a few seconds an item begins to be built from the energies that power his NFL-R. Of course there are many items that can be built with this move for Warren to use. 

• Gatling-Laser (300 Om, Area Attack, Ranged, Homing, Remote Control.):  A blaster that looked like a high tech Gatling Gun but fires lasers. While these may be low in power, and manifesting this from the NFl-R takes him about twelve seconds, Warren primarily uses this as a way to attack multiple opponents at once. This has a range of 100 feet in any direction. It's moderately draining on his stamina and takes both of his hands to use. Can be used while moving, though decreases accuracy to do so. Cannot be used with other moves when the Gatling Laser is active, except for Shield - P.  However, this cannot block super attacks, or reduce the damage of such. Any would instantly penetrate the shield, and destroy it. In addition, this shield has a 3 second cool down between uses, giving them a 3 second window during which time they can clobber him with energy attacks. 
  

• Reproduction (RP Flavor):  When Warren sees a move that is a weapon that can be replicated through any form of science, the design of the weapon is stored in his NFL-R, but locked from him until he has officially gotten the NFL-R calibrated to use it. Calibration takes the rest of the thread, and then some time as well, so he cannot use items he makes for battle during the same thread. They must also be finalized (purchased OOCLY) and adapted (fit him instead of the original user.) Furthermore, this follows DOUBLE the time of normal summoning rules for those items. For any items not intended to be used in combat a new rule applies, though. This would take 5x the regular time it would take to summon an item for Warren to create items using this. 
  

• NFL-Barrier (900, Area Attack, Area Shield, Remote Control, Ranged, Physical, Debuff Prof.):  NFL Barrier is a shield move that Warren programmed into his NFL-R as an app that he can choose to trigger. This has three modes that he can use. The first will simply block attacks that he is capable of defending against. The second will take the attack, and then retaliate by firing a 2 by 3 foot beam of energy out at the opponent who has dealt the attack with a high amount of power, and the third version of the shield will retaliate, but instead of firing a beam of energy it will instead be like the opponent has been struck by a bolt of lightning. Each of the modes takes Warren about 5 seconds for him to charge up before he can use any of them. This is moderately draining on his stamina. It should be noted though that just a SINGLE attack from a Prime who is more powerful than him could shatter the shield with such force that he cannot use the move again for about 1 minute. The Lightning Bolt will paralyze one of their limbs if they use their hands for combat, or should they be not reliant on that, will immobilize them. The limb paralysis lasts 12 seconds, and the full body paralysis lasts 6. 
  

[Reece]

@13 - Never surrender! Don't suffer oppression!


So anyway, here's my advice; in addition to changing the cooldown section to omit Smite (just make it an entirely separate move). You also don't need to mention that people will attack him whilst he's standing still... it's pretty obvious already. And you should add in linked charge times and stuff too... because that makes it more interconnected, and by Dane logic that somehow means you have more chance of getting it approved as one move.

Here's how I would recommend writing it:

Psykana Discipline (1800) (requires ranged prof, ranged materialize prof, telepathy, area defence, buff, debuff, area attack)
The Emperor uses his psychic mastery to attack his enemies; though its effects can differ, Psykana Discipline's cooldown, charge-time, fatigue cost and range are the same regardles. Charging this move cannot be interrupted by taking damage, except from a Super Move, however the Emperor must remain stationary whilst charging and cannot use any other moves or powers at the same time.
Delayed Choice: The Emperor does not need to choose which of its effects he wants to use until after he has finished charging Psykana Discipline.
Cooldown: Each separate aspect of Psykana Discipline can be used only once per 10 minutes, with no more than 5 uses total of Psykana Discipline in that time.
Charge Time: Psykana Discipline must be charged for at least 5 seconds before use, but can be charged for up to 30 seconds if the Emperor wishes.
Fatigue: Psykana Discipline tires the Emperor quickly whilst charging, so it can be risky to try and build up his attacks to their maximum power too often.
Range: Psykana Discipline has a maximum range of 50 metres.

Terrifying Visions: The emperor fills the mind of an enemy with visions of torment and what scares them most, making them more likely to keep their distance and attack less for the duration. The minimum duration is 10 seconds and the maximum is 30 seconds. The duration increases by 2 seconds for each second Psykana Discipline has been charged and by 5 seconds for each point of TEC the Emperor has above his target. Suppression will make the hallucinations transparent and Enhanced Senses will not detect them, letting the target know that they don't exist.

Gaze of the Emperor: The Emperor's eyes blaze in vengeful fury and as his rage is made manifest and he shoots twin red beams through his eyes at the nearest target. It will appear to pierce the target regardless of their DEF, but will only deal the amount of damage it should based on their Stats. He cannot move his head while using this effect. The lasers travel as fast as a bullet and do average damage at the minimum charge level, but the damage will be 6 times greater if fully charged.

Psychic Barrier: The Emperor forms a psychic barrier that covers an ally's 'skin', which will give them a clear blue, intangible (except when attacked) shield that will shatter after the duration or after taking enough damage. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5, and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the Emperor's DEF (i.e. the shield is as durable as his body)... though he is treated as having 1 extra DEF per 10 seconds charged for the purposes of this shield.

Nightshroud: The Emperor summons a shadow out of the warp, covering an area within range in a bubble with a 6 metre diameter. From outside, it will look like a section of the world is now in absolute darkness and people inside will be unable to see out. The Emperor and any Characters with Enhanced Senses will be able to completely ignore the bubble. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5.

Psychic Maelstrom: The Emperor summons the full force of the warp to defeat his foes, releasing a barrage of psychic attacks against all enemies within a 20 metre diameter circle inside Psykana Discipline's range. The attack takes the form of a swirling green vortex in the sky which fires out as many small bursts of lightning as the number of seconds Psykana Discipline has been charged. Each bolt deals only minor damage, but if there are large numbers of them then this can quickly mount up. The bolts will strike enemies at random, but home in with extreme accuracy and so will rarely miss. 5 bolts are fired per second and the vortex lasts until all bolts have been fired; if no enemies are within range, the bolts will hit the ground or random objects.

Hopefully that should be good enough. Personally I don't think it's too powerful and I think the 'Delayed Choice' option that I gave it should make for a pretty good reason why it has to be all one move (with the linked range, charge-time, etc adding to that), so hopefully this version will be easier to get approved...

Daaamn, though, I hope this is at least closer to being approvable... I spent, like, two hours writing it. T_T

[Viola]

@Reece:
>This needs homing proficiency (Terrifying Visions(?), and definitely Psychic Maelstrom)
>Psychic Maelstrom needs a speed for the lightning (unless it's near-instant, when say that). Remember, fast-moving homing ranged attacks are going to be very weak even without there being a lot of them. The five-second charge will be considerably weaker than the gaze move, for example - so it won't be as devastating as it sounds.
"and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the Emperor's DEF (i.e. the shield is as durable as his body)... though he is treated as having 1 extra DEF per 10 seconds charged for the purposes of this shield."
>You don't need to be this specific for Psychic Barrier. Just say it can be broken with an equivalent amount of effort to what Emps put into it, varying based on the foes ATK vs Emp's DEF. If anything, that's probably more useful to a reader than giving them the raw numbers.
>Gaze of the Emperor needs a duration.
>Comboing the charge with moves that this different is a bit dodgy. I'm not going to say no, since I don't know how far you can go with that, but another mod might force you to bump the cost to 3000 (5*600).

[Reece]

@Reece:
>This needs homing proficiency (Terrifying Visions(?), and definitely Psychic Maelstrom)
>Psychic Maelstrom needs a speed for the lightning (unless it's near-instant, when say that). Remember, fast-moving homing ranged attacks are going to be very weak even without there being a lot of them. The five-second charge will be considerably weaker than the gaze move, for example - so it won't be as devastating as it sounds.
"and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the Emperor's DEF (i.e. the shield is as durable as his body)... though he is treated as having 1 extra DEF per 10 seconds charged for the purposes of this shield."
>You don't need to be this specific for Psychic Barrier. Just say it can be broken with an equivalent amount of effort to what Emps put into it, varying based on the foes ATK vs Emp's DEF. If anything, that's probably more useful to a reader than giving them the raw numbers.
>Gaze of the Emperor needs a duration.
>Comboing the charge with moves that this different is a bit dodgy. I'm not going to say no, since I don't know how far you can go with that, but another mod might force you to bump the cost to 3000 (5*600).

> Oops. I didn't even realise it didn't have Homing listed... but yeah, Visions & Maelstrom would definitely require it.
> I couldn't really think of a good way to describe the damage, so I just went for, ugh, 'minor'. Hopefully it'll be clearer now. Also, the lightning bolts are lightning bolts, dude. Shockingly (geddit, shocking, 'cos it's lightning? I'm so witty...  keptic: ), they move at the speed of lightning.
> Yeah, okay. Thanks. I have no clue how to phrase shield moves.
> Hmm... I'm not really sure if 13 wants it to last a while, but I'd recommend having it end once it hits the max range (piercing everything in between), so I'll write it that way for now.
> You got to dodge out on paying a ton of OM with your EB move, so it's not fair if 13 can't too. Unless I'm mistaken, you only paid 300 for a variable charge time that affects all your elements equally, so he should get the same consideration, which puts it at 1800. 300 for each move, plus 300 for the variable charge time. (5 * 300) + 300 =1800.
Also, for the record, I based the idea for the Delayed Choice off your 'multispell' thing for EB... except this version would be less blatantly overpowered if used in conjunction with Stealth, since Emps couldn't spend an entire minute loading up a whole barrage of spells before releasing them all at once.

Psykana Discipline (1800) (Ranged Proficiency, Ranged Materialise Proficiency, Telepathy, Area Defence Proficiency, Buff Proficiency, Debuff Proficiency, Area Attack Proficiency, Homing Proficiency)
The Emperor uses his psychic mastery to attack his enemies; though its effects can differ, Psykana Discipline's cooldown, charge-time, fatigue cost and range are the same regardles. Charging this move cannot be interrupted by taking damage, except from a Super Move, however the Emperor must remain stationary whilst charging and cannot use any other moves or powers at the same time.
Delayed Choice: The Emperor does not need to choose which of its effects he wants to use until after he has finished charging Psykana Discipline.
Cooldown: Each separate aspect of Psykana Discipline can be used only once per 10 minutes, with no more than 5 uses total of Psykana Discipline in that time.
Charge Time: Psykana Discipline must be charged for at least 5 seconds before use, but can be charged for up to 30 seconds if the Emperor wishes.
Fatigue: Psykana Discipline tires the Emperor quickly whilst charging, so it can be risky to try and build up his attacks to their maximum power too often.
Range: Psykana Discipline has a maximum range of 50 metres.

Terrifying Visions: The emperor fills the mind of an enemy with visions of torment and what scares them most, making them more likely to keep their distance and attack less for the duration. The minimum duration is 10 seconds and the maximum is 30 seconds. The duration increases by 2 seconds for each second Psykana Discipline has been charged and by 5 seconds for each point of TEC the Emperor has above his target. Suppression will make the hallucinations transparent and Enhanced Senses will not detect them, letting the target know that they don't exist.

Gaze of the Emperor: The Emperor's eyes blaze in vengeful fury and as his rage is made manifest and he shoots twin red beams through his eyes at the nearest target. It will appear to pierce the target regardless of their DEF, but will only deal the amount of damage it should based on their Stats. He cannot move his head while using this effect. The lasers travel as fast as a bullet and do average damage at the minimum charge level, but the damage will be 6 times greater if fully charged. They continue travelling until hitting Psykana Discipline's maximum range (piercing everything along the way), at which point the lasers vanish.

Psychic Barrier: The Emperor forms a psychic barrier that covers an ally's body, which will give them a clear blue, intangible (except when attacked) shield that will shatter after the duration or after taking enough damage. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5, and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the amount of time and energy the Emperor spent preparing it, varying based on his foe's ATK vs his DEF.

Nightshroud: The Emperor summons a shadow out of the warp, covering an area within range in a bubble with a 6 metre diameter. From outside, it will look like a section of the world is now in absolute darkness and people inside will be unable to see out. The Emperor and any Characters with Enhanced Senses will be able to completely ignore the bubble. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5.

Psychic Maelstrom: The Emperor summons the full force of the warp to defeat his foes, releasing a barrage of psychic attacks against all enemies within a 20 metre diameter circle inside Psykana Discipline's range. The attack takes the form of a swirling green vortex in the sky which fires out as many small bursts of lightning as the number of seconds Psykana Discipline has been charged. To an average person (1 DEF), each bolt delivers a painful electric shock, but will deal very little actual damage. Even so, if charged long enough, the sheer number of blasts can make this a powerful attack. The bolts move at lightning-speed and will strike enemies at random, but home in with extreme accuracy and so will rarely miss. 5 bolts are fired per second and the vortex lasts until all bolts have been fired; if no enemies are within range, the bolts will hit the ground or random objects.

@13 - BTW, I've changed the Nightshroud effect to complete darkness instead of just twilight... since that's basically fodder, because it's completely useless, since people can still see just fine during twilight. I would strongly recommend against changing it back... but it's your move.
Also, I'm not totally sure I interpreted the effect correctly... are people within the orb supposed to see everything at a reduced light level, or just what's outside the sphere (like I have it written now)?

[The Emperor of Mankind]

Reece please, stop this before you die
Thanks for doing this, I'll look into it later today and hopefully make a version that will get approved.

[Reece]

^_^

My life for the God-Emperor!

[Viola]

@Reece/13:

>I'd recommend having gaze last a little bit longer. Otherwise anyone who blinks will miss the cool Lazer. Like, a second maybe? Half a second?
>You might want some description of the vortex in the last move. Is it just above Emp's head? Higher up? As big as him? Bigger? I'd recommend keeping it like a storm cloud just above his head, since that way you'd find it easier to use indoors (although can Emps even fit through doors?) but I guess it doesn't really matter. It's just an ambiguous part of the description that 13 should probably fill in.
>That's why I didn't flat out say no. I don't know how far you can stretch the variant system, so I cant say yes either. But, there's a difference between making the power of a ranged blast stronger (the Elemental Blast charged increases the potency of a minor debuff and the damage of the attack, the move doesn't make shields or do things that are clearly different) and making the duration/power of multiple different move types vary. That's something for a higher up to make a ruling on. I'm just warning you that you (or 13) might have to spend 3000 OM on this.

[Reece]

@Reece/13:

>I'd recommend having gaze last a little bit longer. Otherwise anyone who blinks will miss the cool Lazer. Like, a second maybe? Half a second?
>You might want some description of the vortex in the last move. Is it just above Emp's head? Higher up? As big as him? Bigger? I'd recommend keeping it like a storm cloud just above his head, since that way you'd find it easier to use indoors (although can Emps even fit through doors?) but I guess it doesn't really matter. It's just an ambiguous part of the description that 13 should probably fill in.
>That's why I didn't flat out say no. I don't know how far you can stretch the variant system, so I cant say yes either. But, there's a difference between making the power of a ranged blast stronger (the Elemental Blast charged increases the potency of a minor debuff and the damage of the attack, the move doesn't make shields or do things that are clearly different) and making the duration/power of multiple different move types vary. That's something for a higher up to make a ruling on. I'm just warning you that you (or 13) might have to spend 3000 OM on this.

Emps said he'd look into it, so I guess I'll leave these decisions up to him.
That said;
> I think you're probably right here. Even if it doesn't actually change the power level at all, making it last half a second or so just because it'd look cool should be fine.
> Yeah, I can't really comment on that... I was imagining a big, circular whirlpool-looking thing... but I don't actually have a clue how it should really look.
> Okay, sure, I guess Emps will just need to try sending it in at the lower price and hope it goes through.

@Emps - Would you still be willing to buy this move if it had to be priced at 3000?
I also don't know if you have all the powers/proficiencies yet, so keep in mind you'd have all those to get too... it could take a while to save up for.

[Claptrap]

Working on a couple of moves for future NPCs.

Basketball mastery. (300) (Requires ranged proficiency, physical strength, remote control proficiency, 4+ TEC.): Simon is equipped with what appears to be a standard basketball, but it is actually made out of a strange, bouncy metal, and has practised with a it to the point of mastery. Simon can throw the basketball at the speed of an arrow up to 30 metres away with average accuracy. It takes a small amount of energy to throw and does average damage when it impacts an enemy. When it rebounds off a foe, however, it will go in exactly the direction he wants it too, as if he is controlling it. A foe with quick reactions may be able to catch the basketball and throw it away, forcing him to have to retrieve it. If they try to hold onto the basketball, Simon may try to physically take it back. If his ATK is equal to or higher than his opponent's, then he will be successful and regain control of the ball. If his opponent's ATK is higher than his, they retain their hold on the ball. Finally, a foe who has the ball may use it as an incidental weapon, or as a full move if they have mimic.

Ankle breaking. (300) (Requires physical strength, burst movement.): Simon has miniature booster jets in the backs of his heels, allowing him to both change direction and accelerate quickly. This is not just used for utility, however, as it also has a direct combat usage. Simon can charge for three seconds, during which he can move normally but not use any other moves, before boosting up to 15 metres directly into his enemy, attempting to trip them over. If he is successful, that is, if his foe doesn't dodge out of the way in time, his opponent will be knocked down. This takes little energy but does minimal damage and doesn't leave a lingering effect. This means a foe may begin to pick themselves up immediately, albeit while taking Simon's other attacks.

[13-Jzall]

Psykana Discipline (2400) (Ranged Proficiency, Ranged Materialise Proficiency, Telepathy, Area Defence Proficiency, Buff Proficiency, Debuff Proficiency, Area Attack Proficiency, Homing Proficiency)
The Emperor uses his psychic mastery to attack his enemies; though its effects can differ, Psykana Discipline's cooldown, charge-time, fatigue cost and range are the same regardles. Charging this move cannot be interrupted by taking damage, except from a Super Move, however the Emperor must remain stationary whilst charging and cannot use any other moves or powers at the same time.
Delayed Choice: The Emperor does not need to choose which of its effects he wants to use until after he has finished charging Psykana Discipline.
Cooldown: Each separate aspect of Psykana Discipline can be used only once per 10 minutes, with no more than 5 uses total of Psykana Discipline in that time.
Charge Time: Psykana Discipline must be charged for at least 5 seconds before use, but can be charged for up to 30 seconds if the Emperor wishes. All offensive attacks will deal up to 6x more damage (1 stack every 5 seconds) or add in that many projectiles if possible and all defensive or utility moves will last longer with their time being how long he charged x 5.
Fatigue: Psykana Discipline tires the Emperor quickly whilst charging, so it can be risky to try and build up his attacks to their maximum power too often.
Range: Psykana Discipline has a maximum range of 50 metres.

Terrifying Visions: The emperor fills the mind of an enemy with visions of torment and what scares them most, making them more likely to keep their distance and attack less for the duration. The minimum duration is 10 seconds and the maximum is 30 seconds. The duration increases by 5 seconds for each point of TEC the Emperor has above his target. Suppression will make the hallucinations transparent and Enhanced Senses will not detect them, letting the target know that they don't exist.

Gaze of the Emperor: The Emperor's eyes blaze in vengeful fury and as his rage is made manifest and he shoots twin red beams through his eyes at the nearest target. It will appear to pierce the target regardless of their DEF, but will only deal the amount of damage it should based on their Stats. He cannot move his head while using this effect. The lasers travel as fast as a bullet and continue travelling until hitting Psykana Discipline's maximum range (piercing everything along the way), at which point the lasers vanish. The laser will last 1 second after being fired.

Psychic Barrier: The Emperor forms a psychic barrier that covers an ally's body, which will give them a clear blue, intangible (except when attacked) shield that will shatter after the duration or after taking enough damage. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5, and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the amount of time and energy the Emperor spent preparing it, varying based on his foe's ATK vs his DEF.

Nightshroud: The Emperor summons a shadow out of the warp, covering an area within range in a bubble with a 6 metre diameter. From outside, it will look like a section of the world is now in absolute darkness and people inside will be unable to see out. The Emperor and any Characters with Enhanced Senses will be able to completely ignore the bubble.

Psychic Maelstrom: The Emperor summons the full force of the warp to defeat his foes, releasing a barrage of psychic attacks against all enemies within a 20 metre diameter circle inside Psykana Discipline's range. The attack takes the form of a swirling green vortex in the sky which fires out as many small bursts of lightning as the number of seconds Psykana Discipline has been charged. To an average person (1 DEF), each bolt delivers a painful electric shock, but will deal very little actual damage. Even so, if charged long enough, the sheer number of blasts can make this a powerful attack. The bolts move at lightning-speed and will strike enemies at random, but home in with extreme accuracy and so will rarely miss. 5 bolts are fired per second and the vortex lasts until all bolts have been fired; if no enemies are within range, the bolts will hit the ground or random objects. This takes form as a large, green storm cloud that is circling The Emperor's head.

Added in the bits Eb suggested
@reece I have everything but telepathy from memory
Changed it so that the charging bonus is universal if possible which cuts it down to 2400

[Dane Regan]

@13: I didn't say you *had* to increase the cost like that. Just that you might have to. I can't comfortably make a ruling - and I don't want you to be spending more OM than you need to. As for the other details of the move, you can hash it out with Reece.

@Clap: For the basket ball, could he choose to have it bounce between multiple opponents? Back and forth and keep doing damage? Or will he always have it bounce back towards him? I'm just wondering because it moves fast-ish so it could be used to stack a lot of damage on a slow/unskilled opponent. Perhaps saying it looses speed (and this damage) after each bounce would be a good way to balance that. Also, I don't think you need to have a TEC requirement. It'd only be needed if Ranged Control wasn't used. Lastly, why does this need physical?

Ankle: Does he move at normal max speed (do unless for burst movement)? With a 3 second charge, you might be able to get him to move a bit faster - or reduce the number. Heck, anyone with super jumped could probably just hop out of the way without being that fast. Also, side comment: maybe add that this counts as a use of burst movement so it would put that power on cooldown for a second.

Also, I don't really think you actually need a move for this. You can trip people over normally. Unless there's something special about it, I wouldn't bother with it.

[Reece]

A few things:

1) The "All offensive attacks will deal up to 6x more damage (1 stack every 5 seconds) or add in that many projectiles if possible and all defensive or utility moves will last longer with their time being how long he charged x 5." bit was something I had considered trying to fit into the 'charge time' note originally, but the problem is that you only have two damaging effects, and the way I've written them, the charge time affects them both differently... as such, there's not much point in adding this here. If all (or almost all) of your sub-moves were damaging, like with Ebony's Elemental Blast, then I'd certainly say that you should mention something like this (and the same goes for if the only change was to duration for every move). As is, though, there's not really any point. If you really want to add more information here, you could put something like "The effect of increased charge time varies between Psykana Discipline's various aspects (see below)" ... but you really don't need to, because people are going to read your whole move before telling you whether you've missed out any information, so they'll realise pretty quickly that everything is explained below even if you don't explicitly point it out.

2) I removed the bit about the laser vanishing as soon as it hits max range from Gaze of the Emperor, since that conflicts with the 1 second duration (because bullets travel faster than 50m/s).

3) I edited the wording a bit for Psychic Maelstrom, as I hadn't realised previously that you wanted it to be centred on his location (I had thought he'd be placing the vortex above a point anywhere within range, rather than just floating above his head)... I don't think it'd be overpowered if you wanted to put it back that way, but if you want it to be limited to floating above his head then that's fine too.

4) I'm not sure why you have it priced at 2400? 300 for each of the five effects makes 1500, with an extra 300 for the ability to charge it, which comes to 1800 in total... where did you get the extra 600 OM from? You can put it back that way if you think it needs it, but for the time being I've set it to 1800 again.

Psykana Discipline (1800) (Ranged Proficiency, Ranged Materialise Proficiency, Telepathy, Area Defence Proficiency, Buff Proficiency, Debuff Proficiency, Area Attack Proficiency, Homing Proficiency)
The Emperor uses his psychic mastery to attack his enemies; though its effects can differ, Psykana Discipline's cooldown, charge-time, fatigue cost and range are the same regardles. Charging this move cannot be interrupted by taking damage, except from a Super Move, however the Emperor must remain stationary whilst charging and cannot use any other moves or powers at the same time.
Delayed Choice: The Emperor does not need to choose which of its effects he wants to use until after he has finished charging Psykana Discipline.
Cooldown: Each separate aspect of Psykana Discipline can be used only once per 10 minutes, with no more than 5 uses total of Psykana Discipline in that time.
Charge Time: Psykana Discipline must be charged for at least 5 seconds before use, but can be charged for up to 30 seconds if the Emperor wishes.
Fatigue: Psykana Discipline tires the Emperor quickly whilst charging, so it can be risky to try and build up his attacks to their maximum power too often.
Range: Psykana Discipline has a maximum range of 50 metres.

Terrifying Visions: The emperor fills the mind of an enemy with visions of torment and what scares them most, making them more likely to keep their distance and attack less for the duration. The minimum duration is 10 seconds and the maximum is 30 seconds. The duration increases by 5 seconds for each point of TEC the Emperor has above his target. Suppression will make the hallucinations transparent and Enhanced Senses will not detect them, letting the target know that they don't exist.

Gaze of the Emperor: The Emperor's eyes blaze in vengeful fury and as his rage is made manifest and he shoots twin red beams through his eyes at the nearest target. It will appear to pierce the target regardless of their DEF, but will only deal the amount of damage it should based on their Stats. He cannot move his head while using this effect. The lasers travel as fast as a bullet and continue travelling until hitting Psykana Discipline's maximum range, piercing everything along the way. The laser will last 1 second after being fired.

Psychic Barrier: The Emperor forms a psychic barrier that covers an ally's body, which will give them a clear blue, intangible (except when attacked) shield that will shatter after the duration or after taking enough damage. The duration is equal to the charge time multiplied by 5, and the amount of damage that can be taken is based on the amount of time and energy the Emperor spent preparing it, varying based on his foe's ATK vs his DEF.

Nightshroud: The Emperor summons a shadow out of the warp, covering an area within range in a bubble with a 6 metre diameter. From outside, it will look like a section of the world is now in absolute darkness and people inside will be unable to see out. The Emperor and any Characters with Enhanced Senses will be able to completely ignore the bubble.

Psychic Maelstrom: The Emperor summons the full force of the warp to defeat his foes, releasing a barrage of psychic attacks against all enemies within a 20 metre diameter circle centred on his location. The attack takes the form of a swirling green vortex (a large, green storm cloud with a whirlpool-like shape) in the sky above his head, which fires out as many small bursts of lightning as the number of seconds Psykana Discipline has been charged. To an average person (1 DEF), each bolt delivers a painful electric shock, but will deal very little actual damage. Even so, if charged long enough, the sheer number of blasts can make this a powerful attack. The bolts move at lightning-speed and will strike enemies at random, but home in with extreme accuracy and so will rarely miss. 5 bolts are fired per second and the vortex lasts until all bolts have been fired; if no enemies are within range, the bolts will hit the ground or random objects.

[James Knight]

NFL-R App - Arms Factory (1200, Physical Strength, Debuff, Area Attack, Area Shield, Homing, Ranged Proficiency, Remote Control Prof.):

Warren taps a button on his wrist and within a few seconds an item begins to be built from the energies that power his NFL-R. Of course there are many items that can be built with this move for Warren to use.




Gatling-Laser (300 Om, Area Attack, Ranged, Homing, Remote Control.): A blaster that looked like a high tech Gatling Gun but fires lasers. While these may be low in power, and manifesting this from the NFl-R takes him about twelve seconds, Warren primarily uses this as a way to attack multiple opponents at once. This has a range of 100 feet in any direction. It's moderately draining on his stamina and takes both of his hands to use. Can be used while moving, though decreases accuracy to do so. Cannot be used with other moves when the Gatling Laser is active, except for Shield - P. However, this cannot block super attacks, or reduce the damage of such. Any would instantly penetrate the shield, and destroy it. In addition, this shield has a 3 second cool down between uses, giving them a 3 second window during which time they can clobber him with energy attacks.
Reproduction (RP Flavor): When Warren sees a move that is a weapon that can be replicated through any form of science, the design of the weapon is stored in his NFL-R, but locked from him until he has officially gotten the NFL-R calibrated to use it. Calibration takes the rest of the thread, and then some time as well, so he cannot use items he makes for battle during the same thread. They must also be finalized (purchased OOCLY) and adapted (fit him instead of the original user.) Furthermore, this follows DOUBLE the time of normal summoning rules for those items. For any items not intended to be used in combat a new rule applies, though. This would take 5x the regular time it would take to summon an item for Warren to create items using this.
NFL-Barrier (900, Area Attack, Area Shield, Remote Control, Ranged, Physical, Debuff Prof.): NFL Barrier is a shield move that Warren programmed into his NFL-R as an app that he can choose to trigger. This has three modes that he can use. The first will simply block attacks that he is capable of defending against. The second will take the attack, and then retaliate by firing a 2 by 3 foot beam of energy out at the opponent who has dealt the attack with a high amount of power, and the third version of the shield will retaliate, but instead of firing a beam of energy it will instead be like the opponent has been struck by a bolt of lightning. Each of the modes takes Warren about 5 seconds for him to charge up before he can use any of them. This is moderately draining on his stamina. It should be noted though that just a SINGLE attack from a Prime who is more powerful than him could shatter the shield with such force that he cannot use the move again for about 1 minute. The Lightning Bolt will paralyze one of their limbs if they use their hands for combat, or should they be not reliant on that, will immobilize them. The limb paralysis lasts 12 seconds, and the full body paralysis lasts 6.

[Dane Regan]

@Warren:
>Split this up. Make a gatling laser move and a shield move. Don't shove it all together as one.
>Remove the reference to "Shield-P" from Gatling Laser. I.e., this:

except for Shield - P. However, this cannot block super attacks, or reduce the damage of such. Any would instantly penetrate the shield, and destroy it. In addition, this shield has a 3 second cool down between uses, giving them a 3 second window during which time they can clobber him with energy attacks.

Since it doesn't make sense for it to be there. Put shield strength comments in the shield move.
>What is the fire rate of the Gatling Laser? How fast do the lasers go?

"The first will simply block attacks that he is capable of defending against"
>Not enough information. This is not a description of the move, just a very brief uninformative explanation of what it does.
"The second will take the attack, and then retaliate by firing a 2 by 3 foot beam of energy out at the opponent who has dealt the attack with a high amount of power"
>Why should the shield here be just as strong as the first one when it does something else as well?
>2 by 3 foot doesn't make sense. That's not a measurement you can use to describe a laser - unless you want it to be a large rectangular beam?
>Again, not enough description.

"and the third version of the shield will retaliate, but instead of firing a beam of energy it will instead be like the opponent has been struck by a bolt of lightning"
>Same as what I said for the second mode.

"It should be noted though that just a SINGLE attack from a Prime who is more powerful than him could shatter the shield with such force that he cannot use the move again for about 1 minute."
>Don't throttle yourself. I highly suggest you remove this. Damage of moves is based on both drawbacks (charge, fatigue, etc.) and ATK.

"The Lightning Bolt will paralyze one of their limbs if they use their hands for combat, or should they be not reliant on that, will immobilize them. The limb paralysis lasts 12 seconds, and the full body paralysis lasts 6."
>Put this information near where you first describe paralysis. Put the general information on fatigue and charge time nearer to the start of the move.
>This would require an extra 300 OM, since it can do two different things.
>This time is too long considering you also want a shield as well. And, presumably, you're doing damage too. That's too much.

>I highly suggest that you look at some other shield moves. Also, split up your shield move so it's clear how each version works and how they're different.

>Actually, next time you post, I want to see the Gatling-Laser move and a basic (300 OM) shield move. Once your basic shield is sorted, then we can consider adding variants.

[The Emperor of Mankind]

@reece
>that bit was there to make it go down a bit since it wouldn't be having a rule on every move saying the different charge which would have made each power go up to 600 instead of the flat 900 additional cost.
>I meant for it to be like a tracer bullet but that works too
>Either/or is ok but 50 meters from emp's head is pretty good
>1500+900 from the additional move effects

[Crocodile]

Old Version

Ground Secco; Tier 1 Super Utility (Debuff, Area Attack): (600) Crocodile places his hand on the ground and uses his dehydration ability to dry out a 50 meter area around him, turning it into a desert wasteland. Within this area, an extreme heat and dryness pervades everything and everyone aside from Crocodile and his allies will find that even the simplest actions take far more energy than they usually do. For the duration of the Fight (or about 10 non-combat posts), all Moves, Powers, and Abilities which aren't powered by SP cost roughly twice as much stamina to perform. Super Defenses may cancel this effect on individuals, or on groups if the Super Defense is an Area Defense.

New (hopefully better balanced) Version

Ground Secco; Tier 1 Super Utility (Debuff, Area Attack): (600) Crocodile places his hand on the ground and uses his dehydration ability to dry out a 30 meter area around him, turning it into a desert wasteland. Within this area, an extreme heat and dryness pervades everything and everyone aside from Crocodile and his allies will find that even the simplest actions take far more energy than they usually do. For a round of combat (or about 2 non-combat posts), all Moves, Powers, and Abilities which aren't powered by SP cost roughly twice as much stamina to perform, including mundane actions like simple attacks, moving, and even just breathing. This can be maintained from round to round if Crocodile desires, by expending additional SP.

[Omni]

Ground Secco; Tier 1 Super Utility (Debuff, Area Attack): (600) Crocodile places his hand on the ground and uses his dehydration ability to dry out a 30 meter area around him, turning it into a desert wasteland. Within this area, an extreme heat and dryness pervades everything and everyone aside from Crocodile and his allies will find that even the simplest actions take far more energy than they usually do. For a round of combat (or about 2 non-combat posts), all Moves, Powers, and Abilities which aren't powered by SP cost roughly twice as much stamina to perform. Super Defenses may cancel this effect on individuals, or on groups if the Super Defense is an Area Defense. If not blocked, Crocodile may maintain this ability round to round by continuing to expend SP, but if it was blocked, then he is unable to utilize Ground Secco again during this combat (or storyline, if not in a Fight).

Just my notes from IM but to make it official/transparent what I'm thinking:

I don't think Super Defense really applies to this kind of super utility. I mean he targets the ground, not a person. A super dodge or block isn't going to change a thing.

However it is counter-able in most situations if the other player really wants, by letting them run away. Of course this can leave them open to attacks, denies a 30 meter area, and depends on their speed compared to Croc's speed (and disabling abilities), but I think with these changes, 1 SP is fair for a round.

I also asked Jeffo to clarify that, as per the fluff description, it's not just moves and powers that are doubly fatigued, but even basic movement and non-move attacks.

[Reece]

@reece
>that bit was there to make it go down a bit since it wouldn't be having a rule on every move saying the different charge which would have made each power go up to 600 instead of the flat 900 additional cost.
>I meant for it to be like a tracer bullet but that works too
>Either/or is ok but 50 meters from emp's head is pretty good
>1500+900 from the additional move effects

> Okay, I see where you're coming from now... but if you're going that route I'd suggest reworking all of the moves to have a duration element of equal length rather than an increase in power... I can do that for you if you'd like, and it'll probably increase the chances of it being improved a fair bit... but it could make Gaze kinda weird, since the only way to work it (without being told to break that one off into a separate move) would be to increase the laser's duration to match that of the other moves (2.5 minutes max), which would obviously make it much, much, much weaker. It will make it a fair bit more likely to get approved as one move and approved cheaper... but I dunno if you'd be willing to change that effect so drastically to achieve that?
Side-note; doing this would also make terrifying visions and psychic maelstrom much less effective.

> Naah... it's laser eyes. Making it have homing would be kinda silly. Also, it would completely negate the drawback of him not being able to move his head, so the laser would need to be weaker.

> Okay, sure, next time I write up an edit for the move I'll put that back in. I like it better that way myself, since it means that the Range aspect applies equally to all effects, which makes it seem more like one big move rather than a bunch of small ones stuck together.

> Like I said in my first point, I won't say it's impossible to get it approved like that, but I doubt it'd fly. You'll probably need to either change the charge effect to a duration increase (of equal size) for all aspects of the move, which should hopefully reduce the charge cost to just 300 OM (like for Dabony's move), or you'll maybe get asked to pay 600 per effect... just putting that note there won't be convincing enough to persuade anyone who wouldn't already have been willing to give you it at the cheaper price, I don't think.

[Hecate Rothchild]

Freeze: (600) OM Ranged Proficiancy/Debuf Proficiancy.
Shantotto channels her magical powers for 6 seconds creating a small 5 foot wide maelstrom at target location. After 2 seconds the maelstrom flash freezes dealing moderate damage.

This attack applies a debuff to target on hit that increases the damage dealt by fire based spells. This debuff lasts 10 seconds.

Shantotto is slightly strained using this spell. As it drains about 1/10th of her mana reserves.
Freeze has a 60 foot range.


(starting move for my second chara)