Move Approval V

[Jak Mar]

T1SU - Flash Freeze - Light Jak (600 OM) (Debuff, Ranged, Homing)

Jak in his Light form is able to freeze a enemy in place by focusing on them for a couple of seconds, then appearing to clap his hands above his head, allowing him safe passage while his enemy is stopped temporarily. This effect lasts 40 seconds. A frozen enemy cannot be targetted or harmed by any means. This can be blocked by a T1 super defence.

[Amber Veritz]

Kamisoritoge, Katana Style - Alt form(2000)

Brute force isn’t always the way to win a fight, even Amber knows that. Training with Murasaki has given her the skill to use more intricate blades, and change her fighting style completely. Razorback Berserk cannot be used in this form. Amber’s appearance does change slightly. She loses her faunus heritage(Her cat ears), and her hair becomes a different color.

Stats: 4/0/4/4

Kamisoritoge, aka Razorback Katana - Move(600)

A sharp katana. The blade gleams orange and is extendable past the standard katana length. In it’s short form, the blade is around 3ft long(Short of a meter) in it’s extended form, the unwieldy blade reaches 8 feet past it’s hilt. This is a standard weapon that can only be used with Katana style.

Tracker, Advanced sense - 300

A tactical move used to locate targets by tracking their footsteps. While active, Amber can trace a person footprint through previously invisible imprints left behind while in her animal forms(Faunus and Panther). The ‘imprint’ can be tracked for up 2 minutes from the time it was made, and can be harder to track if an opponent has higher tec, or stealth. She can used this ability every five minutes and it can be sustained for a total of 30 seconds. Although it’s a natural instinct to a hunter-animal, it’s difficult to continuously use even after it’s cooldown. Doing so can leave Amber vulnerable to moderate fatigue.

[Ash]

RCC Programs:
>30 seconds is a bit long. For your moving 50% faster option, I'd suggest about 10 seconds tops. Maybe 15 seconds if it makes the robot get more tired from moving (i.e. uses more fuel).
>Can you be more specific on the accuracy/damage changes? Stuff like, "improves gun stability so bullets travel straight" or "improves targetting systems, allowing them to hit many shots that would have been a near-miss, and grazing shots become more solid hits" for the accuracy one, for example.

DeadEyeBot Mk 1: Approved. But this doesn't need ranged/ranged control since it's an assist. You'd only need ranged control if you summoned a drone with a normal move.

M1’s Shotgun Installment: That shotgun has a lot of spread, but: approved with ranged prof (or physcial prof I guess since it has a short viable range).

DeadEyeBot Mk 2: Approved. Doesn't need ranged/ranged control. Just flight. And Enhanced Senses.

M2’s Machine Gun Installment: "It can also do small bursts of 10 bullets per second" This would make the move cost 300 more OM (since it's an alternative fire mode). Normally it fires 8.33... bullets per second, so you don't need to add it. Also, remember to add your proficiencies (ranged prof in this case).

Wait. So I can summon a drone without needing to make it an assist? From my understanding they have to be an assist to be helpful in a fight. Or can they be a move instead and just not have stats?

Would I still need to make their weaponry a different move? Can I make the eyebots with guns for 300-600 OM instead of 1300 OM assists? (with appropriate editions)

[Dane Regan]

@Ash: Assists are only required to create "intelligent" summons.

If it's something you need to focus on or control with a remote, it can be achieved with ranged proficiency and ranged control. Or if it's something mindless that does a simple action (like a zombie or clone that just walks up to someone and punches them) it could be done with homing. The latter is equivalent to just a homing fireball spell, if you think about it. Except it looks like a zombie and punches you instead of exploding.

A move-based assist will cost 300 OM per function. So, 300 OM for a gun. 300 OM if you want it to be able to use a different gun. It also won't gain access to your moves, so you'll need to pay more OM to individually work them into its functions. There's some information about that at the top posts of this thread.

It won't need stats, but it will need you to specify how fast it can move and how durable it is, etc.

If you're interested in creating something like that (or have further questions), it might be worth going to the move creation workshop or having a hunt about and copying a similar move.

[Dane Regan]

Rafael Esquivel:
[spoiler]

D.E. Air Cutter (300, Ranged Proficiency, Homing Proficiency):

Aircutter is an attack Rafael can do by channeling Dark Energon into the air around him, a process that takes about 5 seconds to successfully perform. During the time of performing the process, Rafael cannot dodge, nor attack, nor do anything. However, this allows him to generate 30 crescent shaped blades of air that are about the size of horses each [be more specific], that he can send at an opponent. These are sent one after another over a period of 5 seconds. Each travels at the speed of an arrow, and homes in. This homes in very accurately on an opponent, zig-zagging until it reaches the opponent. Does a fair amount of damage overall.

D.E. Orb (300, Ranged Proficiency, Homing Prof. ):

A Basketball sized orb of Dark Energon that can be generated by Rafael, or Unicron. Manifesting the orb into existence takes about seven seconds, and requires the complete concentration of Rafael, or Unicron. This means that they cannot do anything while making the orb. The orb travels at the speed of an arrow and can home in an opponent. The orb is fired out of the palm of his hand towards an opponent. The orb has a range of 56 feet. It is very draining on his stamina and so he cannot spam the orbs at an opponent, even if he wanted to do so. The orb travels in a zig-zag pattern. However, should the orb take any damage he would have to remake the orb entirely, and try again. This is very accurate though.

D.E. Air Cutter: "horses" are not a specific enough measurement. Horses vary in size. I'm pretty sure I told you that when you posted this in the Move Creation Workshop, and one of the comments I inserted into your move for you to respond to is still there (from the MCW). I've bolded it to draw it to your attention.

D.E. Orb: Approved.
[/spoiler]
Reece:
[spoiler]

First off, I'd like to make a small change to China's 'Resilient China Central Eye' RP Fodder Move. I can't really see this being rejected, since all I'm doing is adding a completely unnecessary drawback which in no way improves how the move functions in the slightest (addition in bold):

Resilient China Central Eye (0)
(Hive Mind, Survival, Flight, Disassemble)
https://image.ibb.co/b54hw7/Hallo_eye_small.png
In the centre of China’s head floats a third eye; an amber-and-black-coloured, lacquered orb of solid porcelain, which is as durable as stone. In addition to being used to see, this 2.5-inch-wide sphere also serves as the core of his being; his heart and brain both. So long as it exists, China will not die, no matter what happens to the rest of his body. Conversely, however, if it is broken then he will perish immediately, no matter how fine the condition of the rest of him. This also means that he cannot Disassemble his third eye, as that would still count as it being broken, and would therefore kill him.

Essentially, what this means in OOC terms is that no one can smash his third eye without either winning a graded fight or getting OOC permission… in much the same way that they wouldn't normally be allowed to decapitate someone (who didn’t have Survival) during a fight.

Even though the eye is not actually physically attached to the rest of China's body, and so can fly around freely within and around his current position, it is still connected to him by his magic, and as such must always remain within at least 2 metres of 50% or more of his total body mass (though this 2m distance would increase/decrease proportionately if he were to use the Growth/Shrink Power to alter his size). This distance limitation means that he could not simply spit out his eye and have it alone fly off to safety if a Fight was going badly for him. Also, as all of China's senses are tied to the Central Eye, his first two eyes cannot be used whilst it is outside his body; the three eyes will never all be active at the same time.

And second, I have another Move I'd like to get approved for China... to make him more... china-like:

Fine China Sharp Shards (300)
(Physical Strength, Survival, Hive Mind, Disassemble, Flight)
As China’s entire body is composed of hollow porcelain, any broken parts will generally have sharp edges, and as such can be used as weapons in battle (e.g. stabbing someone with the stump of his arm after having a hand shattered). That said, they’re not particularly effective weapons, as they still have his DEF, so in clashes with swords or other weapons, they will just end up breaking more. Further, they will be unable to harm anyone whose DEF is equal to or greater than China’s ATK, and will usually just break even more if he strikes such a target with too much force. To anyone with DEF lower than his, they will cut just as easily as would any other bladed weapon wielded by someone with his ATK.

These shards can also be made to fly through use of the Flight and Hive Mind Powers, no different from how those would function with any other broken off body parts. Further, one way that China can choose to Disassemble his body is to voluntarily shatter it into a multitude of these shards, with only his Central Eye being left intact (see ‘Resilient China Central Eye’). That said, unlike in a fully Disassembled form, these shards are still able to be damaged in the exact same ways his normal body could, aside from the fact that it’s usually much easier for them to dodge, due to being so much smaller (like trying to shoot a shoal of fish, as opposed to a single shark).

Even though I’ve described how this Move can be used in conjunction with his Powers, I wouldn’t really class those as different uses; all I’m really asking for here is to get his body to be sharp when I break it… so for now I’ve just priced this at 300 OM.

Resilient China Central Eye: Approved.

Fine China Sharp Shards: 
300 - Using a shattered limb as a sharp melee weapon.
300 - Breaking off parts of sharp your body to hit people with.

The first off these options you can remove from this move if you want to save OM - and just keep it like an incidental-ish weapon. Unless you'd prefer to be effective with it (where it'd be strong because it hurts you in the process - which is a pretty good drawback).

Anyway, I know you're a fan of using direct stat comparisons in your moves, but that's really not how it works. It's a gradient and the numbers are guidelines for the roleplay. So "they will be unable to harm anyone whose DEF is equal to or greater than China’s ATK" is just gimping your character. Even someone with 1 ATK can get a lucky shot on someone with 4 DEF. So, while there's no problem with the line if you really want to keep it, you can cut it out.

As for the second part, add that the shards can't go further than 12ft from his centre of mass (or the eye), since you have physical prof listed but not ranged. Also, while sorta implied, add something about controlling more shards requiring more concentration, making it harder to coordinate them all.
[/spoiler]
Jak Mar:
[spoiler]

T1SU - Flash Freeze - Light Jak (600 OM) (Debuff, Ranged, Homing)

Jak in his Light form is able to freeze a enemy in place by focusing on them for a couple of seconds, then appearing to clap his hands above his head, allowing him safe passage while his enemy is stopped temporarily. This effect lasts 40 seconds. A frozen enemy cannot be targetted or harmed by any means. This can be blocked by a T1 super defence.

Approved.
[/spoiler]
Amber Veritz:
[spoiler]

Kamisoritoge, Katana Style - Alt form(2000)

Brute force isn’t always the way to win a fight, even Amber knows that. Training with Murasaki has given her the skill to use more intricate blades, and change her fighting style completely. Razorback Berserk cannot be used in this form. Amber’s appearance does change slightly. She loses her faunus heritage(Her cat ears), and her hair becomes a different color.

Stats: 4/0/4/4

Kamisoritoge, aka Razorback Katana - Move(600)

A sharp katana. The blade gleams orange and is extendable past the standard katana length. In it’s short form, the blade is around 3ft long(Short of a meter) in it’s extended form, the unwieldy blade reaches 8 feet past it’s hilt. This is a standard weapon that can only be used with Katana style.

Tracker, Advanced sense - 300

A tactical move used to locate targets by tracking their footsteps. While active, Amber can trace a person footprint through previously invisible imprints left behind while in her animal forms(Faunus and Panther). The ‘imprint’ can be tracked for up 2 minutes from the time it was made, and can be harder to track if an opponent has higher tec, or stealth. She can used this ability every five minutes and it can be sustained for a total of 30 seconds. Although it’s a natural instinct to a hunter-animal, it’s difficult to continuously use even after it’s cooldown. Doing so can leave Amber vulnerable to moderate fatigue.

Katana Style: Approved, but you might want to add what different colour her hair becomes on your roster.

Razorback Katana: How does she change it between the forms? Is it instant? Does she focus for a bit? Also, while it may seem obvious, add physical strength as a requirement.

Tracker, Advanced sense: What I'm gathering is that you want to see people's footsteps, so, where someone has been? This should be fine but:
>You need to add enhanced senses as a requirement.
>Stealth won't impact this. Suppression would, likely with the usual TEC rules. So if they have the same TEC as you (or more) then I'd say you shouldn't be able to track them with this (since enhanced senses wouldn't sense them normally). If you have a bit more TEC than them, the footsteps will be hazy and a lot will probably be missing - just generally harder to track. As you approach double their TEC, you can start to ignore their suppression.
>Are you concentrating on this to use it? Or could you do this while runnin' and gunnin'?

Note that you don't need a move to track someone through conventional means. Suppression won't help someone if they step on an actual twig, and if you're mostly playing Amber somewhere where it's easier to leave physical tracks, you could easily get by tracking people without this move.
[/spoiler]

[Reece]

[spoiler]

Fine China Sharp Shards: 
300 - Using a shattered limb as a sharp melee weapon.
300 - Breaking off parts of sharp your body to hit people with.

Doesn't breaking off parts just count as using Disassemble, though?
I wouldn't have thought I'd need to pay an extra 300 to do something I can already do using a Power I paid 800 for...

The first off these options you can remove from this move if you want to save OM - and just keep it like an incidental-ish weapon. Unless you'd prefer to be effective with it (where it'd be strong because it hurts you in the process - which is a pretty good drawback).

Nah. I'd rather not pay extra for no reason, but if I have to then so be it. I'd rather pay more than get a weak Move.

Anyway, I know you're a fan of using direct stat comparisons in your moves, but that's really not how it works. It's a gradient and the numbers are guidelines for the roleplay. So "they will be unable to harm anyone whose DEF is equal to or greater than China’s ATK" is just gimping your character. Even someone with 1 ATK can get a lucky shot on someone with 4 DEF. So, while there's no problem with the line if you really want to keep it, you can cut it out.

Okay, thanks. I've chosen to keep in the bit about them usually breaking if he hits someone with high DEF, since it makes sense IC for them to work that way, because armour is harder than china... but I removed the bit about being unable to deal damage, as you suggested.

As for the second part, add that the shards can't go further than 12ft from his centre of mass (or the eye), since you have physical prof listed but not ranged.

Oops. Forgot about that. I've added Ranged Proficiency as a requirement.
I figure I don't really need to point out that half of his body needs to stay near the eye, since the Central Eye Move already mentions that. The other half can attack at range, though.

Also, while sorta implied, add something about controlling more shards requiring more concentration, making it harder to coordinate them all.

I'm not sure how much concentration you're expecting this to require... he's literally just using Disassemble. The Disassemble Power doesn't state that moving your body requires any more Focus than normal whilst Disassembled... though presumably doing multiple different things at the same time would still be really difficult, just as it would with a normal body (like, have you ever tried that thing where you rub your stomach and pat your head at the same time...? That shit is difficult).
So I've just added a note to say that it uses the same amount of Focus as moving while Disassembled. That should cover it.





So here's the updated version (changes in bold):

Fine China Sharp Shards (600)
(Physical Strength, Ranged Proficiency, Survival, Hive Mind, Disassemble, Flight)
As China’s entire body is composed of hollow porcelain, any broken parts will generally have sharp edges, and as such can be used as weapons in battle (e.g. stabbing someone with the stump of his arm after having a hand shattered). That said, they’re not particularly effective weapons, as they still have his DEF, so in clashes with swords or other weapons, they will just end up breaking more. Further, they will also usually end up breaking if he strikes a target with comparatively high DEF (equal to or greater than his ATK) with too much force. To anyone with DEF lower than his, they will cut just as easily as would any other bladed weapon wielded by someone with his ATK.

These shards can also be made to fly through use of the Flight and Hive Mind Powers, no different from how those would function with any other broken off body parts. Further, one way that China can choose to Disassemble his body is to voluntarily shatter it into a multitude of these shards, with only his Central Eye being left intact (see ‘Resilient China Central Eye’). That said, unlike in a fully Disassembled form, these shards are still able to be damaged in the exact same ways his normal body could, aside from the fact that it’s usually much easier for them to dodge, due to being so much smaller (like trying to shoot a shoal of fish, as opposed to a single shark). Note that using his body in the form of these shards requires the exact same amount of Focus as it would to control an equal portion of his body mass if it was Disassembled in a normal way through the use of the Power without a Move.

For the time being I've increased the price to 600... feel free to reconsider that cost and knock it back down to 300 if you want, though. =P
[/spoiler]

[Dane Regan]

Doesn't breaking off parts just count as using Disassemble, though?

It does, yes. But using those parts to damage people isn't part of the base power (unless you want it to be incidental).

Fine China Sharp Shards (600)
(Physical Strength, Ranged Proficiency, Survival, Hive Mind, Disassemble, Flight)
[spoiler]As China’s entire body is composed of hollow porcelain, any broken parts will generally have sharp edges, and as such can be used as weapons in battle (e.g. stabbing someone with the stump of his arm after having a hand shattered). That said, they’re not particularly effective weapons, as they still have his DEF, so in clashes with swords or other weapons, they will just end up breaking more. Further, they will also usually end up breaking if he strikes a target with comparatively high DEF (equal to or greater than his ATK) with too much force. To anyone with DEF lower than his, they will cut just as easily as would any other bladed weapon wielded by someone with his ATK.

These shards can also be made to fly through use of the Flight and Hive Mind Powers, no different from how those would function with any other broken off body parts. Further, one way that China can choose to Disassemble his body is to voluntarily shatter it into a multitude of these shards, with only his Central Eye being left intact (see ‘Resilient China Central Eye’). That said, unlike in a fully Disassembled form, these shards are still able to be damaged in the exact same ways his normal body could, aside from the fact that it’s usually much easier for them to dodge, due to being so much smaller (like trying to shoot a shoal of fish, as opposed to a single shark). Note that using his body in the form of these shards requires the exact same amount of Focus as it would to control an equal portion of his body mass if it was Disassembled in a normal way through the use of the Power without a Move.


For the time being I've increased the price to 600... feel free to reconsider that cost and knock it back down to 300 if you want, though. =P
[/spoiler]

Quick question, did you really mean "To anyone with DEF lower than his"? Or did you mean to say "To anyone with DEF lower than his ATK"? Since I don't think anyone has a DEF lower than you >_>

Otherwise, looks good. Approved.

[Reece]

[spoiler]

Quick question, did you really mean "To anyone with DEF lower than his"? Or did you mean to say "To anyone with DEF lower than his ATK"? Since I don't think anyone has a DEF lower than you >_>

Oops. Yeah. Changed that.

Doesn't breaking off parts just count as using Disassemble, though?

It does, yes. But using those parts to damage people isn't part of the base power (unless you want it to be incidental).

But that's what the first 300 OM is for... right?
I mean, I know that you wrote it as being 'stabbing people with a broken limb'... but that was just an example I was giving. The effect I'm actually paying for here is having his body be made of a material which is sharp when it breaks.
I'm not sure why it matters whether the parts were broken by an enemy or broken using Disassemble.


Also, on another note related to pricing: I know that having Ranged Proficiency along with Hive Mind & Flight allows me to use his broken body parts to attack at further than 12' away... but is Ranged Proficiency alone enough for this, or do I also have to go through all of his 'body part' Moves and pay an extra 300 OM for every single one to be able to get that effect?

If so, then this one might have to cost an extra 300 for that reason as well?

Fine China Sharp Shards (600)
(Physical Strength, Ranged Proficiency, Survival, Hive Mind, Disassemble, Flight)
As China’s entire body is composed of hollow porcelain, any broken parts will generally have sharp edges, and as such can be used as weapons in battle (e.g. stabbing someone with the stump of his arm after having a hand shattered). That said, they’re not particularly effective weapons, as they still have his DEF, so in clashes with swords or other weapons, they will just end up breaking more. Further, they will also usually end up breaking if he strikes a target with comparatively high DEF (equal to or greater than his ATK) with too much force. To anyone with DEF lower than his ATK, they will cut just as easily as would any other bladed weapon wielded by someone with his ATK.

These shards can also be made to fly through use of the Flight and Hive Mind Powers, no different from how those would function with any other broken off body parts. Further, one way that China can choose to Disassemble his body is to voluntarily shatter it into a multitude of these shards, with only his Central Eye being left intact (see ‘Resilient China Central Eye’). That said, unlike in a fully Disassembled form, these shards are still able to be damaged in the exact same ways his normal body could, aside from the fact that it’s usually much easier for them to dodge, due to being so much smaller (like trying to shoot a shoal of fish, as opposed to a single shark). [b]Note that using his body in the form of these shards requires the exact same amount of Focus as it would to control an equal portion of his body mass if it was Disassembled in a normal way through the use of the Power without a Move.

[/spoiler]

[Dane Regan]

[spoiler]

Quick question, did you really mean "To anyone with DEF lower than his"? Or did you mean to say "To anyone with DEF lower than his ATK"? Since I don't think anyone has a DEF lower than you >_>

Oops. Yeah. Changed that.

Doesn't breaking off parts just count as using Disassemble, though?

It does, yes. But using those parts to damage people isn't part of the base power (unless you want it to be incidental).

But that's what the first 300 OM is for... right?
I mean, I know that you wrote it as being 'stabbing people with a broken limb'... but that was just an example I was giving. The effect I'm actually paying for here is having his body be made of a material which is sharp when it breaks.
I'm not sure why it matters whether the parts were broken by an enemy or broken using Disassemble.


Also, on another note related to pricing: I know that having Ranged Proficiency along with Hive Mind & Flight allows me to use his broken body parts to attack at further than 12' away... but is Ranged Proficiency alone enough for this, or do I also have to go through all of his 'body part' Moves and pay an extra 300 OM for every single one to be able to get that effect?

If so, then this one might have to cost an extra 300 for that reason as well?

Fine China Sharp Shards (600)
(Physical Strength, Ranged Proficiency, Survival, Hive Mind, Disassemble, Flight)
As China’s entire body is composed of hollow porcelain, any broken parts will generally have sharp edges, and as such can be used as weapons in battle (e.g. stabbing someone with the stump of his arm after having a hand shattered). That said, they’re not particularly effective weapons, as they still have his DEF, so in clashes with swords or other weapons, they will just end up breaking more. Further, they will also usually end up breaking if he strikes a target with comparatively high DEF (equal to or greater than his ATK) with too much force. To anyone with DEF lower than his ATK, they will cut just as easily as would any other bladed weapon wielded by someone with his ATK.

These shards can also be made to fly through use of the Flight and Hive Mind Powers, no different from how those would function with any other broken off body parts. Further, one way that China can choose to Disassemble his body is to voluntarily shatter it into a multitude of these shards, with only his Central Eye being left intact (see ‘Resilient China Central Eye’). That said, unlike in a fully Disassembled form, these shards are still able to be damaged in the exact same ways his normal body could, aside from the fact that it’s usually much easier for them to dodge, due to being so much smaller (like trying to shoot a shoal of fish, as opposed to a single shark). [b]Note that using his body in the form of these shards requires the exact same amount of Focus as it would to control an equal portion of his body mass if it was Disassembled in a normal way through the use of the Power without a Move.

[/spoiler]

Approved, as before.

Think of it like throwing knives. Those cost 600 OM at times. 300 for melee, 300 for ranged. It's the same thing here, basically. That's why your move costs 600 OM. Sure you're just paying for sharpness, similar to someone just paying for knives. But punching someone in the face with a sharp snapped arm is one thing, and shooting lots of razor shards at someone is another.

Edit:

Also, on another note related to pricing: I know that having Ranged Proficiency along with Hive Mind & Flight allows me to use his broken body parts to attack at further than 12' away... but is Ranged Proficiency alone enough for this, or do I also have to go through all of his 'body part' Moves and pay an extra 300 OM for every single one to be able to get that effect?

You just need ranged prof to control parts of you further than 12ft away - you don't need a move. The OM cost from this move comes from using broken parts of your body as a sharp weapon for melee and for ranged.

[Ebonywood Hellscythe]

(This is only 300 OM since Ebony has to leak fire after doing the punch. The fire's intentionally slower than walking speed, it's there to give Ebony space rather than to deal damage. And executing this move with a punch, a swing of a wand, or a swing of her scythe are all identical - since regardless of how she does it they're hit by a telekinetic force, not the actual weapon. Same effect. Different execution.)

Infernal Deluge (300) Requires: Physical, Ranged, Area Attack, Telekinesis
[spoiler]Ebony charges up mana for 3 seconds. She can do this while moving or taking damage, but can't focus on any other moves/powers at the same time. Within a second after building up strength, she lashes out with a basic melee strike - this can be with her fists, or one of her weapons. Instead of the attack connecting as usual, the stored energies are all expelled at once a fraction of a second before she hits her opponent. This takes the form of a powerful burst of telekinetic energy that hits like a strong slam spread out over the target's body. Most foes are pushed back by about 10m if this hits directly, with the distance varying by up to a couple of metres either way based on Ebony's ATK and their DEF.

Following the blow, fiery magicks forcibly leak out of Ebony in the form of a slow sweeping wave of dark purple fire. This only takes about half a second, where Ebony is forced to stand roughly still. The fire is expelled from any weapons she's holding and her body - as well as the air about 0.5m around her. The flames travel at 1m/s in the direction of the attack. While slow, they eventually reach a distance of 15m in a cone-shaped blast before dissipating into the air, spreading out in a 15m arc at their furthest point. The curved rectangular-shaped wave is about 1m thick and reaches 5m high at its maximum range (it starts at 2m tall after creation). It provides a treacherous hazard to the battlefield, dealing moderate damage to all who touch it - and especially those who pass through it. The fire is just as strong at a distance as it is at the source despite dispersing and growing wider. While the flames don't completely block vision or prevent attacks from passing through, they serve as a way to help Ebony use the space she creates for herself, although there's nothing stopping something from going over or round. Ebony cannot be harmed by how own fire, and the flames are unaffected by wind and small obstacles, but shields can leave gaps in the waves.[/spoiler]

[Shantotto]

Dimensional Break .01% (1000 OM) 1SP per round
Shantotto uses her vast understanding of magic and how different universes operate to break the very rules of the omniverse, granting her .01% of her true combat potential.

During which she has an increase of

2ATT
1DEF
0SPD
2TEC

[Amber Veritz]

Kamisoritoge, Katana Style - Alt form(2000)

Brute force isn’t always the way to win a fight, even Amber knows that. Training with Murasaki has given her the skill to use more intricate blades, and change her fighting style completely. Razorback Berserk cannot be used in this form. Amber’s appearance does change slightly. She loses her faunus heritage(Her cat ears), and her hair becomes a different color.

Stats: 4/0/4/4



Kamisoritoge, aka Razorback Katana - Move(600)
requires Physical Strength

A sharp katana. The blade gleams orange and is extendable past the standard katana length. In it’s short form, the blade is around 3ft long(Short of a meter) in it’s extended form, the unwieldy blade reaches 8 feet past it’s hilt. The extension takes only a second by clicking a button on the hilt, which propels the blade from a hollow point(It's two pieces of metal, one inside the other.)This also makes it an unpredictable stabbing weapon for up to five feet. Switching between the two lengths can cause the mechanism to malfunction, but usually Amber avoids this problem by simply not doing that. If it [i]does/i] happen, it takes 5-10 seconds to fix it, otherwise it will be locked in it's current length. This is a standard weapon that can only be used with Katana style.

Tracker, Utility Move
requires Advanced sense(Faunus or Panther form only)

A tactical move used to locate targets by tracking their footsteps. While active, Amber can trace a person footprint through previously invisible imprints left behind while in her animal forms(Faunus and Panther). The ‘imprint’ can be tracked for up 2 minutes from the time it was made, and can be harder to track if an opponent has higher tec. She can used this ability every five minutes and it can be sustained for a total of 30 seconds. Although it’s a natural instinct to a hunter-animal, it’s difficult to continuously use even after it’s cooldown. Doing so can leave Amber vulnerable to moderate fatigue. This move adhears to the normal Advanced Sense rules, meaning tracking those with equal tec to Amber may be possible if they have supression, but very difficult nevertheless. This move also requires Amber's concentration to work. While active, her vision blurs to the world around her, making it difficult to see more than 20ft away(Except for footprints which she can see from 30t away). Beyond that, she can only see black fuzz. Her hearing still works fine and she can deactivate this move whenever she feels the need, but she must wait the cooldown time even if she prematurely deactivates Tracker.

[Dane Regan]

Amber Veritz:
[spoiler]

Kamisoritoge, Katana Style - Alt form(2000)

Brute force isn’t always the way to win a fight, even Amber knows that. Training with Murasaki has given her the skill to use more intricate blades, and change her fighting style completely. Razorback Berserk cannot be used in this form. Amber’s appearance does change slightly. She loses her faunus heritage(Her cat ears), and her hair becomes a different color.

Stats: 4/0/4/4

Approved.

Kamisoritoge, aka Razorback Katana - Move(600)
requires Physical Strength

A sharp katana. The blade gleams orange and is extendable past the standard katana length. In it’s short form, the blade is around 3ft long(Short of a meter) in it’s extended form, the unwieldy blade reaches 8 feet past it’s hilt. The extension takes only a second by clicking a button on the hilt, which propels the blade from a hollow point(It's two pieces of metal, one inside the other.)This also makes it an unpredictable stabbing weapon for up to five feet. Switching between the two lengths can cause the mechanism to malfunction, but usually Amber avoids this problem by simply not doing that. If it [i]does/i] happen, it takes 5-10 seconds to fix it, otherwise it will be locked in it's current length. This is a standard weapon that can only be used with Katana style.

Approved. You should note that I'm assuming this underlined part is mostly fodder and added fluff (and not something you intended as a drawback), since it's a random effect that sometimes happens, but there's nothing forcing it to occur or any mention of how often it is.

Tracker, Utility Move
requires Advanced sense(Faunus or Panther form only)

A tactical move used to locate targets by tracking their footsteps. While active, Amber can trace a person footprint through previously invisible imprints left behind while in her animal forms(Faunus and Panther). The ‘imprint’ can be tracked for up 2 minutes from the time it was made, and can be harder to track if an opponent has higher tec. She can used this ability every five minutes and it can be sustained for a total of 30 seconds. Although it’s a natural instinct to a hunter-animal, it’s difficult to continuously use even after it’s cooldown. Doing so can leave Amber vulnerable to moderate fatigue. This move adhears to the normal Advanced Sense rules, meaning tracking those with equal tec to Amber may be possible if they have supression, but very difficult nevertheless. This move also requires Amber's concentration to work. While active, her vision blurs to the world around her, making it difficult to see more than 20ft away(Except for footprints which she can see from 30t away). Beyond that, she can only see black fuzz. Her hearing still works fine and she can deactivate this move whenever she feels the need, but she must wait the cooldown time even if she prematurely deactivates Tracker.

If you have equal TEC it would be impossible to sense someone who has suppression with enhanced senses, so this move would be useless for tracking them. You could, however, note that while Amber can't see/sense their imprints, she can still see the usual physical stuff such as footprints and broken twigs and use that to track them.

Personally, I think having to concentrate on this is enough of a drawback. So you don't really need the limited vision thing (although I'd still specify what range you can see 'imprints').

Lastly, make sure to include the 300 OM cost.
[/spoiler]
Shantotto:
[spoiler]

Dimensional Break .01% (1000 OM) 1SP per round
Shantotto uses her vast understanding of magic and how different universes operate to break the very rules of the omniverse, granting her .01% of her true combat potential.

During which she has  an increase of

2ATT
1DEF
0SPD
2TEC

T1 powerups cost 1sp per post and 2sp per round. I advise you check the rules next time when you make something for the first time.

Also, is there really no visual change or anything? Or change to how she acts or utilises the new stats? Descriptions aren't really mandatory for powerups, but you should really add something (you don't need to though). It's useful and important writing fodder.

Lastly, while obvious, add that this is a T1 powerup somewhere to the title/PU description.
[/spoiler]

[Shantotto]

Dimensional Break .01% (1000 OM) 1SP per post. (T1 Power up)
Shantotto uses her vast understanding of magic and how different universes operate to break the very rules of the omniverse, granting her .01% of her true combat potential. As it is an unlock of her own power there is no physical/mental change.
at most she may taunt her opponant

During which she has an increase of

2ATT
1DEF
0SPD
2TEC

[Dane Regan]

Dimensional Break .01% (1000 OM) 1SP per post. (T1 Power up)
Shantotto uses her vast understanding of magic and how different universes operate to break the very rules of the omniverse, granting her .01% of her true combat potential. As it is an unlock of her own power there is no physical/mental change.
at most she may taunt her opponant

During which she has an increase of

2ATT
1DEF
0SPD
2TEC

Approved. But, Shan can *think* she's breaking how the OV works at most. Canonically, she's not actually doing that.

[Ash]

Superhot (300)
((Foresight? Insight? Both? Neither?))
Ash focuses for 4 seconds, preparing her mind and senses. During this time she can move and dodge as usual, but not attack. Once the 4 seconds are up, everything seems to stop from Ash's perspective, with her instincts reaching insane levels for the next 15 seconds (real time). She's able to perceive events so quickly that time only seems to move forward when she moves or acts. Even moving bullets will appear to be frozen in the air. If Ash perform an action slower than normally possible for her, then everyone else appears to move in slow motion respectively. This doesn't allow her to use, charge, or execute moves faster than usual or act beyond her physical capabilities, it just allows her to act a lot more precisely, performing feats such as cutting bullets out the air or catching an arrow with their bare hands - providing she can physically move fast enough to do so.
While this move doesn't enhance Ash's physical abilities, it does force her to always move and act at maximum efficiency. As a result of this, it will often leave her more tired than she usually would be. Ash cannot recover fatigue or energy while this is in use by conventional means (i.e. resting normally) but can end this effect early at will. Lastly, the mental preparation required to execute this successfully exerts a light fatigue cost and leaves her dizzy for a few seconds after use.

[Erik Vrell]

Atrophy - T2 super (800) (Requires ranged proficiency, homing, debuff)

Erik raises his hand and invokes the God of death, bringing a curse upon his foes which causes their muscles to weaken and their attacks to lose power. Once used, the selected foes lose 8 ATK per post, or 4 ATK per round, divided among them as Erik sees fit. Can be blocked by a super defense of equal or higher tier.

[Dane Regan]

Superhot (300)
((Foresight? Insight? Both? Neither?))
Ash focuses for 4 seconds, preparing her mind and senses. During this time she can move and dodge as usual, but not attack. Once the 4 seconds are up, everything seems to stop from Ash's perspective, with her instincts reaching insane levels for the next 15 seconds (real time). She's able to perceive events so quickly that time only seems to move forward when she moves or acts. Even moving bullets will appear to be frozen in the air. If Ash perform an action slower than normally possible for her, then everyone else appears to move in slow motion respectively. This doesn't allow her to use, charge, or execute moves faster than usual or act beyond her physical capabilities, it just allows her to act a lot more precisely, performing feats such as cutting bullets out the air or catching an arrow with their bare hands - providing she can physically move fast enough to do so.
While this move doesn't enhance Ash's physical abilities, it does force her to always move and act at maximum efficiency. As a result of this, it will often leave her more tired than she usually would be. Ash cannot recover fatigue or energy while this is in use by conventional means (i.e. resting normally) but can end this effect early at will. Lastly, the mental preparation required to execute this successfully exerts a light fatigue cost and leaves her dizzy for a few seconds after use.

As far as I can see, you're just mentally boosting reactions. Insight doesn't fit. You're not actually slowing time down or anything (so time manip isn't needed). Foresight is for the future, not the present. So, approved. But with no power requirements.

Atrophy - T2 super (800) (Requires ranged proficiency, homing, debuff)

Erik raises his hand and invokes the God of death, bringing a curse upon his foes which causes their muscles to weaken and their attacks to lose power. Once used, the selected foes lose 8 ATK per post, or 4 ATK per round, divided among them as Erik sees fit. Can be blocked by a super defense of equal or higher tier.

You can only do 8 ATK/post OR 4 ATK/round per super move. Pick one.

[Erik Vrell]

Atrophy - T2 super (800) (Requires ranged proficiency, homing, debuff)

Erik raises his hand and invokes the God of death, bringing a curse upon his foes which causes their muscles to weaken and their attacks to lose power. Once used, the selected foes lose 4 ATK per round, divided among them as Erik sees fit. Can be blocked by a super defense of equal or higher tier


Reduced to just -4 per round.

[Dane Regan]

Atrophy - T2 super (800) (Requires ranged proficiency, homing, debuff)

Erik raises his hand and invokes the God of death, bringing a curse upon his foes which causes their muscles to weaken and their attacks to lose power. Once used, the selected foes lose 4 ATK for the next round, divided among them as Erik sees fit. Can be blocked by a super defense of equal or higher tier

Approved, but with a minor edit. Since you can't keep this going for multiple rounds (you can reuse it each round, though). Which is probably what you meant, but that was unclear from the wording.