Omniverse: Sims 3 Edition

[Jade Harley]

:frog:

...

:frogbon: Sorry Kakashi.

[Ganondorf]

Enjoyable.

[Victor Wolfe]

Funny as always

[King Axorn]

IT LOOKS SO AWEFUL BUT I LOVE IT! XD Also... since when was Axorn into other guys? Just blame it on DPs shenanigans.

[Ruby Rose]

IT LOOKS SO AWEFUL BUT I LOVE IT! XD Also... since when was Axorn into other guys? Just blame it on DPs shenanigans.

:frogbon: DP's secretly a vampire.

[Kakashi Hatake]

:frog:

...

:frogbon: Sorry Kakashi.

:foreveralone:

Also, I fucking died when Proto showed up. Masterfully done, Godmind.

[Simon]

DANTE

DANTE WHAT WHY ARE YOU FCUKING WITH J IN YOUR FRIEND'S BED SRSLY

FOR SPARDA'S SAKE MAN GET SOME PANTS ON FOR ONCE IN YOUR DAMN SIM LIFE

[Trixie]

Not to hijack the thread, but anyone remember the original Sims and the mods they used to have? There was this Darth Vader guy who created a car you could put in your lot that had a car alarm. However 9 times out of 10 it started leaking oil onto the ground for whatever reason and then randomly caught fire creating a car sized blaze on my front lawn. Good times.

[Tearen Wover]

Hello.



Welcome to a very special edition of Omnisims.



This is Concrete Fart.

It is on fire. But our story today does not begin here.



Today we highlight one of the unsung heroes of the town; someone you may have not even realized lived among the madness.

This is where he lives. A single bedroom bachelor pad with an open floor plan and a nice little garden, complete with garage space for a nice little compact car.

It also has an elevated rear deck for watching ocean sunsets and hosting dinner parties.





This is the tenant.




His name is Doom Guy.

Age: 43

Occupation: Space Marine

Likes: Ripping, Tearing, Explosions

Dislikes: Demons, Idiots, Appletinis



Doom Guy does not live alone. He has a housemate.



Her name is Coco the Unicorn.

Age: 43

Occupation: Unicorn

Likes: Mischief, Discord, Apples

Dislikes: Harmony, Rules, Imported Asian Vehicles.




Doom Guy and Coco have a very close relationship. So close, in fact, that Doom Guy's arm will phase through his own head just so he can pet Coco on the right side of her muzzle.







Coco and Doom Guy spend their evenings in the living room, watching reruns of Leave it to Beaver and working on their calisthenics.






Doom Guy's occupation gives him a lot of free time, since the world usually isn't under attack from the legions of hell. To pass the time, when he isn't exercising vigorously, Doom Guy tends to his garden. Shirtless.


But at least he has his desert camo pants on.


I mean come on.


He's a soldier or whatever.


Obviously he wears camouflaged clothing on a casual basis.








Coco likes to spend her free time excreting on other people's lawns. Today, LAW gets to learn that Unicorns do not, actually, poop rainbows.






Whereas Doom Guy is socially marooned, by choice, Coco is very friendly with the other horses around the neighborhood, especially Orion, the horse who likes at the 40k house.

She thinks dat booty just too fine.

Orion doesn't like horses.


Orion is an existentialist.






In the evenings, Doom Guy and Coco ride into town to eat dinner at the local diner. Doom Guy usually orders the same thing; double cheeseburger with steak fries.

Coco orders severed heads severed heads. Oops.


Doom Guy does not like to make a big deal out of himself.



Coco is a shameless attention whore.



And Dante is still walking around in his underwear.



I guess he had to rush out of the house before Clone Jade once again mauled his gentleman's affair like how a...


...you know, I'm not going to finish that. This story isn't about them.




Doom Guy and Coco like to spend time at the town's small horse exercise arena.

Today, after their riding session, Doom Guy notices something he doesn't like.



It's name is Nealaphh.



Nealaphh is a trigger for Doom Guy.







Introductions are made.








Conversation ensues.


BONUS GAME: Spot the Okami.







Once Nealaphh and Doom Guy have reached a mutual conclusion about how Nealaphh is the scourge of this planet and should number his days, the astral abomination hops into his imported asian vehicle and flees home.





Not content to let the demon get away, Doom Guy and Coco give chase.



Which brings us back to this.





You see, this fire was only a decoy.

I'm not sure if you knew, but Unicorns can light things on fire.






They can also teleport, so while the residents of Concrete fart throw a giant fit about the flaming imported asian vehicle, Doom Guy and Coco start the REAL fire out back. Jade's sunflowers are not long for this world.









Their work done, Doom Guy and Coco retreat from the scene.




The fire spreads...


...but wait, someone is battling the flames.





Who could it be?








It is Jade Harley. The moment her plants caught fire, her intrinsic Floranation senses triggered, spurring her to drive the flames off from her beloved flowers at all costs.








Mami Tomoe assists, but she is much closer to the flames. Will she perish?


Will she die screaming?









No they put the fires out and then decide to go shopping for shoes the end.


















except it's not the end.




Coco has learned that she LIKES setting things on fire. She wants to show other people how fun it is.

Here we see her trying to make friends with a pirate, but the pirate is apparently afraid of unicorns.





Coco's response is swift.








ROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL




What about things that shouldn't catch on fire.

Can Coco set them on fire?




Yes, Coco can set them on fire. City Hall is on fire.









The following morning, Doom Guy reads about an overnight series of arson attacks. The suspect is believed to be a white female around seven feet tall with long hair.

She also apparently loves apples.


and she also tends to neigh a lot.




and she also is a unicorn.




Doom Guy speaks with Coco and tells her that she can't just light houses on fire whenever she wants.

They smile at each other and decide to go riding.








Smiiiilllleeee










So here they are at the horse park doing horse things while literally everyone else stands around reading books.








On her 39,102nd lap, Coco comes to an abrupt stop. It is that pirate fucker from the night before.








I'm not sure if you knew, but Unicorns can lay potent curses on people.








also because fuck that guy










ROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL







Doom Guy is beginning to see a pattern here. He tells Coco that she can't go around burning other people or their things, although it is indeed fucking hilarious.


Coco understands.


Coco will no longer burn other people or their things.






She will just burn Doom Guy's things.











END.

[Ganondorf]

Pooped on my lawn? Fucking unicorns...

[Simon]

I SWEAR TO GOD, SIMDANTE, MAYBE IF YOU'D STOP WORRYING ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS SO MUCH YOU'D BOTHER TO PUT SOME PANTS ON FOR ONCE IN YOUR SIMULATED LIFE

[Tearen Wover]

ganondorf are you saying you won't stand for this horseshit

[Ganondorf]

We'll just have to see on the next Omnisims, won't we?

[Trixie]

Did Trixie die? Lol Or is she just looming?

[Doomguy]

Totally worth it

[Ruby Rose]

Did Trixie die? Lol Or is she just looming?

Nope, still alive.

[Omni]

Samus is going to make it as a musician, you'll all see.

And please bring Enel in. The LAW household clearly doesn't have enough egotistical assholes :awesome:

[Kopaka]

Seeing as we have a new batch of writers, I figured it's only fair if I ask who else wants to be in this nonsense.

[The Rogue]

*raises hand furiously*

[Granite]

*Raises hand in a more hard boiled manor*