Twinkle in Sweet Repose

[Goku]

There was pain. There was always pain. But pain was merely a physical sensation; it passed through him, leaving no permanent harm. How many times had he broken bones? Torn muscle? Pain was an old friend, one that Goku knew he could embrace and push through. Such was the life that he had chosen for himself. Pain, in many ways, was a good thing. It meant that he was still alive.

Worse, was the confusion. Memories swirled like mist; every time he reached out to try and grab them, they passed easily through his fingers. There was no solid ground beneath him. He was falling. He felt like he had been falling for a very long time.

The memories that did stand out were like jagged spikes in the mist. He could see them rushing up towards him, and try as he might he couldn’t escape them.

He didn’t know where his wife or son were. They probably thought that he’d died on Namek. He couldn’t get back to them. They might never see him again. He’d been ready to die on Namek; ready to give his life to end Freeza’s tyrannical reign. That was something which they would understand; Gohan when he was older if he didn’t understand already. But, he hadn’t even tried to get back to them once he’d arrived in this strange place. He’d just been excited at the thought of all those new people to fight and new things to learn.

He’d failed here, too. Gabriel. Justin. Juliet. They had put their faith in him and he had let them down. They’d asked him to do one simple thing, and instead he’d faltered and now the star piece they had all struggled for so much had slipped out of his grasp. People had bled for it. People had died for it. And he didn’t even know how he’d lost it.

He’d let them down. His family. His friends. He didn’t deserve to live.

Despair rushed up to meet him, and he felt himself bracing for the impact, as though he were preparing to be struck by a physical force rather than the weight of emotion.

“Hello. My name is the Vision. I am here to help.”



The words punched through the despair, bringing Goku back to reality, showing him that there was someone here, someone else… he didn’t deserve to live?! What was he even thinking about?! He didn’t really believe that, did he?

The cool, calm voice of the android caused the man on the ground to flinch. His mind was reeling. There was concrete under his knees, but he didn’t remember how he got here. His body ached, but he no longer felt the bruising impact he remembered from falling. Was he going insane? Had any of that really happened at all?

His head snapped around as Vision’s hand reached out for him, his eyes wild with fright, pupils hugely dilated. For an instant, he didn’t see what was in front of him, he saw the Doctor; the calm voice, the serene expression, the casual authority. He leapt to his feet, assuming a fighting stance, and bright yellow power surged into his palm as he raised his hand towards the threat--

Only to realise that the Doctor hadn’t been red, or wearing a cape.

The power faded away as quickly as it had come to life, and Goku fell out of the stance as quickly as he had fallen into it.

“You’re not him.” He said, looking around the broken and dilapidated corridor as though seeing it for the first time. The scattered, torn bodies of the zombies sent a wave of revulsion through him. “I shouldn’t, you aren’t, this…”

His voice trailed off, and he cleared his throat before starting again.

“I’m Goku.” He replied, and one hand came up to pinch the bridge of his nose, his eyes closing as he focused on that fact. So much else seemed like it was slipping away from him, but he knew who he was. He didn’t know where he was. He didn’t know what he was doing here. But he could still hold on to who he was. That was good enough, for now.

People needed him. He had to be strong, for them.

His eyes opened once, and this time, finally, he seemed able to focus, no longer a captive behind the glassy prison his gaze had become.

He laughed, suddenly. A cheerful, slightly embarrassed, noise, and his hand scratched behind the back of his head as he looked to the man that had apparently saved him from the zombies, and woken him from whatever delirium had threatened to overwhelm him.

“Sorry about that, I must have seemed pretty crazy for a second there!” He exclaimed. “Something strange is going on here.” He continued, helpfully. “I don’t know what it is, but I think it has something to do with this thing I picked up. It was about this big.” He held his hands together, cupped, to indicate the shard. “And it glowed with this bright purple light. Have you seen it around?”