(Preshow) Preshow Facility

[Handsome Jack]

Central Hallway (IIRC, there IS no Teleporter Room. Comon, guys! Read that shit!)

My reptilian eyes survey the area in which I've found myself in abject horr-

God, that's tedious! You know what? I look around and nearly piss myself because FUCK there's a lot of people here. It ain't even that big an area, but for SOME damn reason, people keep passing through or just bullshitting. Like myself, plenty are pouring out of magical holes in time-space too. And they all look like fucking talkers. Rather than get stuck proclaiming the virtues of...

I look at the advertisment indicator tattoo on my wrist.

The virtues of Senor Cactilido's Tequila (It'll getcha DRUNK!), I'd better go ahead and skedaddle out of here. I scan for the quickest, safest way out. While I do so, I take in the atmosphere and... well, it's a hallway. Buncha circular portal pads set evenly along it and a general curve to the whole thing that probably means it's just a big-ass circle.

Closest door says “Bar” and I give it the middle-finger. Nope. Sorry, pal, I ain't opening THAT can of worms and getting sucked into talking to a bunch of drunk folk (and not drunk in the good way). Fortunately, not too far from that door is another proclaiming itself to be the entrance to the Barracks. I remember the blonde bitch saying something about having a private room, so I head my happy-ass off that way.