Official Move Approval IV

[Mark]

Sabrina
[spoiler]

Thank you for the lookover!

About the issues:

Guardian Shield - I may not have described it properly, but what I meant is that the shield can be used as a melee weapon. Sabrina could fly up and drop onto an opponent with the shield in front of her to crush them. But the shield is not throwable. I'd be fine with the move costing 900 though.
I bolded the edits that I made to clarify on the issues you mentioned, and detailing some rough edges.

Combat Knife - Bolded the edits for a static range.

Bolter Cannon - 300 for the bullets, 300 for combining the magazine-ejecting and the reloading, and 300 for saving the magazine for later. I figured that the last two would be different enough (since it makes it unpredictable as to when Sabrina would throw the magazine, if at all) to price each at 300 each.
As I did with the other moves, I've edited some stuff and bolded it. To keep it matching to the Hornet Chaingun's move description I also noted its weight (bolded, of course).
I also changed the Bolter Cannon's mag size from 30 to 10 rounds per mag, as 30 seemed a little too big for a weapon that can be fired only once a second at most.

Hornet Chaingun - A big section at the bottom was added, and some minor bolded edits here and there.

Hope that with the above edits everything is okay!

Shield: I’m still wondering if this is resummonable and the logistics behind it. I see that it cannot be repaired, but can it be resummoned in combat or is that just something that happens outside of combat? I ordinarily wouldn’t care too much if it were just a regular shield but the fact that you can deploy it makes that point sorta important. Hitting them with the shield wouldn’t cost you extra as long as it basically adds no damage to the attack beyond what a regular punch or whatever would. If you want a stronger bash-type move you’d need to pay for it. Not sure of your intent, but feel free to choose.

Combat Knife: Approved.

Bolter Cannon: Approved. And nah, 600 is fine. Since buying another use for a weapon is essentially like buying another move, when you choose to use the clip doesn’t have any bearing on the cost unless holding onto it changes the damage or something.

Hornet: Approved.[/spoiler]

Scarecrow
[spoiler]

These moves are for the NPC Batman which I am creating.

Physical Strength (1000) Ranged (1000) Debuff (1000)

Batarang (300) The Batarang is a small bat-shaped shuriken built to disarm subdue or stun enemies it takes him at least 2 seconds to pull one out of his utility belt and throw it. the Batarang can stun enemies for at least 3 seconds minutes. Batman at least carries a 3 dozen of them in his utility belt.  This version of the Batarang only stuns, unlike other versions that are built to harm or explode. Batman can throw theses for at least 30-40 feet. This move can be used with other moves.    

Batman's cape (600) batman's cape can be used to help him glide, but it can also help in combat as a distraction and to stun enemies. the cape is located on Batman's back, it is a black parachute-like material. It takes Batman at least 1 second to use his cape in combat to confuse or stun enemies. The stun lasts for 5 seconds depending on the TEC of the enemy. The cape stuns enemies by basically hitting them with it, the stun effect happens becuse the enemy  gets confused or disoriented.     

Batman's Grapple gun (300) this is a that shoots a grappling hook it can take and assist Batman up into higher places he needs to get to, such as to get to a roof of a building or get out of an elevator shaft or get to a ledge. The Grapple gun can also disarm and pull enemies towards him. The Grapple gun looks like a normal gun with a wooden handle with a grappling hook at its end. it takes about 3 seconds to pull off of his utility belt and 2-4 seconds depending on how far the target is. Grapple hook can reach about 10-50 feet. The Grapple gun can disarm by grabbing on to an enemy's weapon and yank it out of their hand. The grapple gun can stun by Batman shooting it at his enemy the stun lasts up to 4 seconds depending on TEC.

Bumping thread

Batarang: It looks like you forgot to remove the word ‘minutes’ in that description when you changed the duration. Assuming the 3 seconds part is what’s intended, you’re approved.

Cape: Approved.

Grapple Gun: As long as this doesn’t entail stealing their weapon and the enemy can just grab their weapon off the floor, you’re approved.
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Koal
[spoiler]

Dual Swords of Despair (Physical Cost: 600.)

A design supplied by the newly formed Seraph, these Blades show expert demon craftsmanship. Simple in design, but articulate as well, they leave little to the imagination. They sit on a double scabbard on Koals back for easy access, and can be used at the same time, or individually. The sword situated to the top is slightly shorter and thinner (Measuring at 4' long and 3/4 of an inch wide) allowing for quicker and more prescient strikes, whilst the sword situated in the lower scabbard is slightly heftier and longer (Measuring to 5' long and an inch wide) making it slower than it's smaller counterpart. They can be summoned on the fly and used whilst moving.

Approved.
[/spoiler]

Jak Mar
[spoiler]

Flash Freeze (Requires LIGHT JAK, Time Manipulation)- 300 OM -   Jak's Light form has the unique ability to slow time for up to two minutes. Light Jak appears to be be praying as he claps his hands and the enemy or enemies cannot escape Light Jak's slowing of time itself. If they are faster than him, they can escape the time field.

Regeneration- (Requires LIGHT JAK, Healing)- 600 OM- Light Jak has the ability to heal himself in a fight when the stakes are high. Light Jak stands and heals himself with stored power inside of him.

Light Flight (Requires LIGHT JAK, Flight)-  1800 OM- Light Jak's translucent wings allow him to fly throughout the air to either attack enemies from above, or carry him throughout the air.

Flash Freeze: You’ll need to scale the duration down, 2 minutes is too long to accomplish with a simple move. What’s the size of the area effected and is this around Jak or can he cast it on a point in the distance? How strong is the slow? How long is the cast time? Can this be used while moving/attacking/defending or does the cast require him to stand still and concentrate? How draining is this on Jak? Can this be used along with other moves?

Regeneration: Per the rules on the Regeneration power, you wouldn’t need a move to do small-moderate regenerating (healing fractures, closing wounds), just the power itself and some effort in-combat. If you wanna regenerate actual HP, you’ll need to buy this as a Super Move.

Light Flight: This just looks like the Flight power, so just buy that and you can RP however you’d like.
[/spoiler]

Sombra
[spoiler]

Umbral Sword - Covenant (300, Physical Strength) 

A plain black sword, with red writing on it. It's the sword that the Black Knight wields. It can clash with most weapons, and is fairly sharp. This sword is the signature weapon of the Black Knight, and has no special properties whatsoever to it. This technique, much like the others of the Black Knight is slow, at least for now anyway, moving at the pace of a snail. The Umbral Sword is a buster sword, but with the blade of a broad sword. The length of the blade is about two human bodies. The blade's width is likewise. While it may be heavy this can be swung around expertly by the Black Knight. 

Umbral Hammer - Earth Breaker (600, Physical Strength, Area Effect Proficiency, Debuff.) 

The Umbral Hammer can be used as a weapon to smash a person's face in by default. But this hammer holds a secret to it. For due to magic Sombra has put upon the hammer, when smashed into the ground after being charged for seven seconds, this can create a localized earthquake that could knock a person off of their feet for about 5 seconds. This does low damage for the swings of the hammer, but high damage should the earthquake knock them down, and the hammer be successfully swung then. This technique, much like the others of the Black Knight is slow, at least for now anyway, moving at the pace of a snail. The hammer is an oversized mallet. The affected area is a small city block. This cannot be cast more than 50 feet away from the user. This is moderately draining. It doesn't require complete concentration and can be used with other moves. 

Eye Lasers (300, Ranged Proficiency.):  The need for the Knight to have a ranged weapon was not lost on Sombra, so the helmet was enchanted. This causes it to be able to shoot out blackish reddish beams of energy from the eyes of the helmet. These do low damage but are still likely to at the very least annoy an individual they hit. This technique, much like the others of the Black Knight is slow, at least for now anyway, moving at the pace of a snail. This has a charge of 3 seconds, range of 50 feet. It can be used while moving, and can be maintained. It doesn't require concentration to maintain, but is as draining as running a mile. Since it leaves the hands free this can be usd with other moves. 

Sword: Add in something like “average-sized humans” rather than just “humans” or something similar and you’re good. Sorry to be a stickler, but we have a people that are 2-12 feet tall in the Omniverse so it’s good to be precise.

Hammer: A city block is way too large for the effect you’re stating; you’ll need to shrink it down. A block is typically defined as 100,000 feet square on average which is for all intents the entire battlefield. If you can target an area 50 feet away and bring that area under the earthquake effect, you’ll need to include Ranged as a prerequisite. Also you haven’t mentioned if the user can move while charging it. You should also note that those farther away from the center won’t be affected as strongly, as is the case with AOE moves.

Eye Lasers: You still haven’t mentioned the size of the beams. I’m assuming they’re thin and less than/equal to the diameter of an eye, but I’d like to be sure.
[/spoiler]

Revan
[spoiler]

Ice Strike , ranged proficiency 

Description: Revan fires a single ice bolt the size of one of his arrows out of his palm that travels the speed of a thrown ball. The bolt is designed to pierce armour and freeze a targets wound causing further pain resulting in moderate damage. takes twenty seconds to form before being shot at an opponent and needs ten minutes to recharge. User must focused and aimed carefully and must be stationary though once shot can be forgotten about. 
The ice bolt can then be removed or allowed to melt over time. 


Shadow Barrage , ranged proficiency

Description: Revan creates a cloud of black smoke like substnce around himself before using both arms to launch it at an enemy which it then attaches itself to causing moderate damage around the intended target.
This cloud can expand to fit over a single enemy of any size so long as they are not larger then say a mammoth or else it will only harm as much of their body as possible.
This attack requires full stationary focus and can be fired after only a minute of charging but takes an hour to be used again.
The cloud exists on its target for only ten seconds but will cause cause the target great pain as the shadow attempts to rip its target apart.
Once fired the move can be forgotten about but must focus long enough for it to reach its intended target or else it may go astray.

Sure I will decrease the casting time and cool down I suppose I am fine with Shadow barrage being once per battle though the ice strike I would prefer to be able to use twice if possible I wanted the ice strike to only be a little better then the fire move
I want the ice move to be around the same distance as the fire one maybe a bit more range if possible 
Make the move go as fast as a Dart being thrown instead of a ball actually.

The Shadow barrage can move as fast as a ball instead then and would be quite draining on the stamina since I want it to be a fairly powerful move and would make Revan probably need a bit of a rest after using it
Neither of these will be used with other moves they are on their own
The target is free to escape the cloud at any time 

That all sounds fine. Work those details into the move descriptions and I’ll approve it. Also be sure to mention the range on Shadow Barrage, as I don’t think you’ve yet addressed it.[/spoiler]

Dawn
[spoiler]

(Can't quote, too annoying on mobile)

The Cane req Phy. Str, Ranged, and Area Attack - 900


The most iconic magical item in existence is the magician’s cane. This cane is not used to pull rabbits out of hats though. This cane can be used to launch explosive fireballs, or shots of lightning at her opponents. It also suffices as a decent beating stick! Ain’t that nifty! It takes awhile to summon but can be greatly useful in a pinch. The explosion of fire spreads about ten feet in a quick burst, and just like the lightning, travels about 50ft. The lightning obviously moves faster than the fire. Lastly, the stick only about a foot long.


The fireball(until it explodes) is about a foot in diameter, it takes a second to charge, and a second to release. It moves at about 10ft per second. It will fly for about 100ft at most before exploding on its own. It can prematurely explode by hitting any surface. The explosion is rather small, 3ft diameter.


The lightning is a quicker jolt of energy than the fireball but is hardly covers a wide area. The shot of electricity stays within about 3in of diameter, but travels up to 200ft at about 20ft per second.


It takes hardly any concentration to use these attacks other than a simple charge and release which both take 2 seconds. One to charge and one to release. The can be used in combination with other attacks, including each other. This attack is simple so it doesn't use too much of her energy to cast, but can be taxing if used in rapid repetition.

There’s always an Ace up my sleeve! - 800OM req Area Attack, Ranged, and Remote Control Tier 2 Super


Aria pulls the Ace of Spades from her sleeves. Its loaded with a chip that’s rigged to explode. When thrown it locks onto a person’s signature and explodes on contact. It has a normal range like any other cards, but unlike the others it locks onto her targets. The explosion can can cause some massive damage if her targets aren't built well enough to take the hit. Lastly, the explosion about 10ft in radius.

Illusions req Debuff (300)


Misdirection is the greatest boon a magician has up his sleeve. With a special powder, Aria can get into others minds and make them think they see what they don't. Aria can make it seem like there are copies of herself with the dust, even though there are none. It only seems to the person that there are five of her. Effects only last about ten seconds depending on the person’s TEC. She must be in arm's reach to use this magic dust, and takes effect after about 3 seconds. In that time, the victim finds it slightly difficult to focus their eyes, where they see up to 5 of Aria. The effects can be nullified with high Tec and Enhanced sense. Aria can use other moves while this effect is active.

Illusions will need some sort of stamina drain/number of uses to balance it. Or if you’d rather you can make it something that doesn’t have a limited number of uses, but doesn’t work as well the more times it’s used. Feel free to update with whatever you think is fair.

The others are approved.[/spoiler]

Kelly
[spoiler]

Upgrading Soliton Blast for delicious variable chargeability.

Original, approved version

Soliton Blast: Requires Ranged Attack Proficiency - (300 OM)

A very crude, but still potent, psychokinetic force-bolt, with an effect similar to being struck by a bowling-ball swung hard by a very strong man (That is, one with Kelly's ATK). It's a primitive and inefficient technique, more raw will than finesse, so using it is tiring, and Kelly can only do it three or four times in a row before he starts to feel seriously fatigued. After charging for two seconds, the bolt, which looks likes a tennis-ball sized distortion in the air, is fired from his hand and travels in a straight line, as fast as an arrow, for up to sixty meters.  It can be used while moving, and Kelly can charge it while defending himself, though doing the latter splits his focus and is equivalent to a momentary minus-2 to TEC. The charge-up can be interrupted by a sudden distraction or a solid blow.

New version seeking approval:

Soliton Blast: variable, requires Ranged Attack Proficiency - (600 OM)

A somewhat refined psychokinetic force-bolt, with a variable potency dependent on charge time. Regardless of charge time the bolt, which looks likes a tennis-ball sized distortion in the air, is fired from the hand and travels in a straight line, as fast as an arrow, for up to sixty meters.  It can be used while moving, and Kelly can charge it while defending himself, though doing the latter splits his focus and is equivalent to a momentary minus-2 to TEC. The charge-up can be interrupted by a sudden distraction or a solid blow.

The charge time is variable between zero and eight seconds, with power levels and incurred fatigue gradually increasing between the following benchmarks:

NO CHARGE - It can be fired instantly, at a rate of one bolt per second, in which case it's effect is no greater than a well-thrown punch (ATK) and has little effect on Kelly's energy level.

2 SECOND CHARGE - If Soliton Blast is charged for two seconds, the effect is similar to being struck by a bowling-ball swung hard by a very strong man (That is, one with Kelly's ATK). At this level, using it is tiring, and Kelly only do it three or four times before he starts to feel seriously fatigued. 

FIVE SECOND CHARGE -  At five seconds of charge time, the blast is much more powerful than it's two-second  predecessor, more like the concentrated impact of a large blunt weapon, such as an eight-pound sledgehammer. The stamina cost increases accordingly, and it can only be used twice in succession without rest.

MAXIMUM CHARGE - At it's maximum charge time of 8 seconds,  the force-bolt is truly potent,  like a blow from a fifteen-pound maul with the momentum and centrifugal force of a full 180 degree overhead swing behind it - suitable for splitting logs or breaking large stones in the hands of a strong man, and much more in the hands of an unusually powerful one (Again, ATK). At this level of power, Kelly needs to rest for fifteen seconds after using it, able to take no action other than simple evasion (stepping, retreating, or diving - no rolls or anything sophisticated) and conservative physical defense (basic blocking, no counters, none of his usual technical flair) and will be tired and somewhat error prone for the rest of the fight (effectively -1 TEC).

Oppositional Rotation - Tier 1 Super-attack - requires Physical Strength, Burst Movement, Traveler's Staff (600 OM)

A sudden, extremely powerful downward blow, likely to crack the ground below the target if it connects. It consists of two parts: 


The Setup
Kelly adjusts his grip on his staff, sliding it down towards one end and switching his dominant hand to an overhand grasp. He cocks the weapon back by his hip, taking a stance with his opposing foot forward, and his leading hip turned over so that his leading heel faces his target. This setup takes about three-quarters of a second, and can be interrupted. 

The Execution
The execution of the technique is twenty-five percent physical, seventy-five percent mental. In a sudden burst of raw psychokinetic force,  blowing the tie out of his hair and billowing his clothes as though he were standing in a hurricane, Kelly constructs a pulley-system of dedicated force-vectors acting on his body, enhancing one specifically calculated sequence of muscular actions for just a brief instant. During that instant, he strikes, acting with sudden, unnatural speed as he brings the staff up and over in a vicious arc. He twists at the hips and waist and drops to one knee in order to achieve maximum force, putting his entire body into the strike, but the true power comes from the psychic boost.

Both approved! Nice descriptions, by the way. [/spoiler]

Yukki
[spoiler]

Dome Shield- 300 Requires Area Shield Yukki places both hands on the ground he is standing on, and after 3 seconds, a small domed shield materializes around him. The shield is 7 feet in diameter at the bottom, and it’s center point is where Yukki originated. It is 7 feet tall at it’s highest point. While being made of energy, and fairly costly to use, it shatters after too many hits, and the higher someone’s attack is, the fewer hits they have to use. When shattered, it harmlessly fades away. Yukki can move while inside of the dome, and can use this time to reload his handguns, charge up another move, or fiddle with items in another way. The shield will stay up as long as Yukki needs it when not broken, but is constantly draining energy from him, as if leeching off of his life force.

Can Yukki fire through the shield or does the shield have to fade before he can attack?

Throwing Knives 600 Requires Ranged  Yukki carries a set of six throwing knives inside his jacket, three on each side. If not wearing his jacket, he moves them to his belt. It times of need, they can be thrown at enemies or objects up to 30 feet away. They always land with the blade side in the target. Yukki has to be standing still, or at least not moving, when he throws these knives. They can be hit out of the air by a ranged move, assuming the person using it has a high enough tec to pull it off. They move at a fairly fast speed, being made of a light steel.

If Yukki charges a blade he is about to throw with his energy, taking about five seconds to charge, the knife is thrown at a speed equivalent to a bullet, and the blade tears through the enemy’s body, leaving a knife shaped hole behind it. The blade has a dark purple glow to it when charged, and a purple streak follows it through the air when thrown.

What’s the size on the blades?

For the charged variant, can he charge while attacking/defending (does it require concentration)? How draining is this on his stamina/energy? Can this be used with other moves? Also, like it says in the Move rules you won’t be blowing holes in people with a basic move. If you happen to have a very large different in stats it’s certainly possible, but not something you can bake into the description of the move. I’d put something like “does significantly more damage than normal” or something.
[/spoiler]