Conspiracy Theorist's Vlog [M]

[Guu]

I've been getting a ton of flack for my last one. I just want to say, fuck you sheeple, it's not my fault you can't accept the truth!

Now on to the theorin'!


Guu is not a child

That's right, you heard it here! She's not a child at all, but a full grown adult masquerading as a child! Just think about it, how can a child lead an entire kingdom? How can she do half the things she does? How can a child land a hot boyfriend like Gildarts? And don't give me that prodogy bullshit, just look real hard, she doesn't even act like a child. I bet if you told her fart joke, she wouldn't even laugh because she's not a child. 

So what is she? What is her purpose? It's quite simple my friends.

Guu is a lab experiment to make an army of child soldiers. Yes, you heard me, and Palpatine went with little girls so people would think he's a pedophile, because he wants to hide his gay affair with Aragorn. It's all true, read between the lines!

God Gildarts is hot, why did he wind up with a girl like Guu? It's not fair, there is not justice.

She was able to fight off Gilgamesh because of her child soldier abilities! Where do you think she got all her powers? The ability to get her head cut off and not die? The ability to survive being burnt alive? She's way too powerful to be just a mere child!

Don't be sheeple folks! The truth is out there!