10-25-2014, 11:22 PM
Recently, Ganon opened a thread where he encouraged people to leave feedback regarding the fight between him and Enel. While the thread has been closed, since he went to such trouble to learn what others thought of the fight, I figured I could read it myself and post here about what I thought of it.
Before anything else, let me just say that I really enjoyed the fight in spite of reading it out of context. The posts were well-written and the fight was well-executed. The most interesting part about it was that the two of you essentially balanced each other out as writers, complementing one another with each other's strengths. I have absolutely no doubt you guys are going to make a great team and it will be an extremely tough challenge for anyone to take you guys on.
That said, my feedback will be kind of worthless if I just leave it at that, so I have no choice but to resort to nitpicks in order to at least leave some constructive criticism for you guys.
Enel, what I liked most about your posts is that you did a good job of establishing how the fight relates to your character, i.e. why it is important to him and what motivates him to fight his opponent. It helped make the fight feel like a part of a greater overarching plot rather than just an isolated incident. That said, I felt that some sections of your posts were too much like a raw play-by-play of the fight, which made them a rather dry read. I mean, it was a fight and I'm all for substance over style, but I still think you could have safely used more of your post to be a bit more descriptive and ground the action to a specific time and place.
Ganon, the best part of your writing was that it was well-rounded. You were descriptive enough without going overboard and you touched upon many elements related to the fight. As a result, even though you were working under the same word count limitations as your opponent, I felt (as a reader) that I was able to "get more" out of your posts. However, unlike your opponent, I don't think you did a good job of relating the fight to your character. In fact, the information regarding Ganon's motivations are kind of contradictory and confusing. I suppose it's possible you intended to have Ganon appear conflicted or that the peace offer he made at the end really was a ruse....but either way, that didn't really come across within the text itself.
In any case, regardless of those nitpicks, it was a great fight and I don't envy Link's/Proto Man's job of judging it. I know I would have a very hard time picking a winner. My hat's off to you, gentlemen! Good luck! :tiphat:
Before anything else, let me just say that I really enjoyed the fight in spite of reading it out of context. The posts were well-written and the fight was well-executed. The most interesting part about it was that the two of you essentially balanced each other out as writers, complementing one another with each other's strengths. I have absolutely no doubt you guys are going to make a great team and it will be an extremely tough challenge for anyone to take you guys on.
That said, my feedback will be kind of worthless if I just leave it at that, so I have no choice but to resort to nitpicks in order to at least leave some constructive criticism for you guys.
Enel, what I liked most about your posts is that you did a good job of establishing how the fight relates to your character, i.e. why it is important to him and what motivates him to fight his opponent. It helped make the fight feel like a part of a greater overarching plot rather than just an isolated incident. That said, I felt that some sections of your posts were too much like a raw play-by-play of the fight, which made them a rather dry read. I mean, it was a fight and I'm all for substance over style, but I still think you could have safely used more of your post to be a bit more descriptive and ground the action to a specific time and place.
Ganon, the best part of your writing was that it was well-rounded. You were descriptive enough without going overboard and you touched upon many elements related to the fight. As a result, even though you were working under the same word count limitations as your opponent, I felt (as a reader) that I was able to "get more" out of your posts. However, unlike your opponent, I don't think you did a good job of relating the fight to your character. In fact, the information regarding Ganon's motivations are kind of contradictory and confusing. I suppose it's possible you intended to have Ganon appear conflicted or that the peace offer he made at the end really was a ruse....but either way, that didn't really come across within the text itself.
In any case, regardless of those nitpicks, it was a great fight and I don't envy Link's/Proto Man's job of judging it. I know I would have a very hard time picking a winner. My hat's off to you, gentlemen! Good luck! :tiphat:
![[Image: LsiSHXa.png]](http://i.imgur.com/LsiSHXa.png)
"To confront a person with his shadow is to show him his own light. "
- Carl Gustav Jung
Ezrihel Wrote:I'm so glad DL linked it