Do I need any improvements to my story

[Asriel Dreemurr]

I just read the first chapter of my story, and it wasn't very good. All further contributors, I apologize for the plot holes and writing quality. For people who just want to read it and not contribute, don't be turned away. As mentioned in my last post, I'm rebooting the story. I̶ ̶w̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶f̶i̶n̶i̶s̶h̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶l̶e̶a̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶p̶t̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶p̶e̶o̶p̶l̶e̶ ̶w̶h̶o̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶m̶,̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ any further writing by me shall be made to the second edition.