Secondary Saga Reviews

[Demetri Malius]

Oh, cool. I would kindly like to know my scores and what i can improve on (besides to really get into charactet motives). I know the reason i was oht was because of that ruahed last post °^° and that my oroginal post was lost in the depths of the omniverse... but ive been trying to read a little bit of saga and hopefull get through it over next break ^-^

Word choice and believability: did the internal and external dialogue for iris feel like it was true to the personality i created for her?

The "functions": critique on iris's inrernal functions that read out her internal processes and such, written in italics and later manifested as an alternate personailty.

Overall: pretty much how i did overall in my posts (besides saga 5....)and any other critique i could use.