Fight Challenge: Dante vs. Zangetsu

[Thaal Sinestro]

Deadpool is actually an awesome person to look at for good examples of Voice. He does description pretty damn well also, but I'd say the msot striking feature of the writing is Voice. He's consistently a 4 in that regard.


Here's two good examples of both Description and Voice, right next to each other in this thread: <!-- l --><a class="postlink-local" href="http://omniverse-rpg.com/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=3306&p=34477#p33573">viewtopic.php?f=22&t=3306&p=34477#p33573</a><!-- l -->
This kind of comparisons are good to help you see the difference between the 2 aspects, but they ARE inherently tied together.

The air was moist, and humid. Somewhere far away, birds sang together without rhythm, accompanied by whooping whistles from other unknown creatures. Green—more vivid and lush that any sight the mercenary had seen before—popped from every direction. Not much light pierced the canopy of trees and branches, but the light that did hit the ground did so in fragments, which would dance across the grass every time a breeze swept through.

Description. He clearly describes the area, and the details he offers gives us an sensory and emotional connection to the scene.

It reminded him of past missions, conducted deep within the Asia. They flooded his mind in vague, contorted video clips; memories of his past realm—life too it seemed at times—were beginning to fade away, but some fabrics to them were as durable as a quality pair of denim.

Deadpool expected a much less forested verse. This definitely wasn’t Camelot. He turned to see if the portal behind him still existed. Nothing. All he saw was more trees, grass, tall grass, and shrubbery. The connection between the Danteverse and neighboring verses was a one-way, one-time gig.

”That sucks,” Deadpool muttered, pouting as he turned forward.

There were no paths to guide him—no awkward little people lining up either side of a yellow brick road.

Voice. 100 writers could write this scene, and none of them would write it like this unless they were Deadpool. The humor is in the references he makes, the zany weirdness of it. Like, "denim" as a way to describe a stubborn memory that refuses to fade. Yellow brick road. He injects his, or rather, HIS CHARACTER'S personality into the writing. Even without the clear and good description, I would be able to tell who was writing this because of his strong Voice.