The Secondary Saga

[Gamzee Makara]

GROUP 4

Ha. Hahaha.

Ha.

I detect some manner of venom in our extravagant Captain's words. It would seem I am not held in the highest of regards. So be it. it would not be the first time I am forced to work with charlatans. For now, my motives align with his and every other person's in this room.

Not much is said after this little exchange. Without another word, we move into the strangling darkness, the robot's torch our only source of light. The hall in which we travel through is dusty and decrepit. I question how many centuries it's been since someone has set foot in this god forsaken place. My hand falls to the luminous pistol at my hip. I remove her from her holster and admire the warm blue glow Boomhilda emits. I slowly pull the slide back.

*ka-chik*

Crow jumps at the sound, hand already on the hilt of his weapon. When he realizes it is me he rolls his eyes and keeps moving.

We come to a four way intersection. Several thoughts cross my mind.

"I suggest we take the left path. The layout of such ruins are often never as simple as going straight, and I do not think that-"

I hold up a hand in silence.

Ach mein Gott what is that?

Something is moving. Something is being dragged along the stone ground of the temple. The sound it makes - like sandpaper on brick. It is less than unpleasant. Something tells me this something is quite large and inevitably dangerous to our likelihood of survival. I lower my voice to just above a whisper.

"I do not think that any of you wish to meet what calls the right path its home."

Nothing more to be said about that. We take a left, a left that in turn, takes us down a flight of stairs. I was hoping that our path would take us up and out, not down and dead. At any rate, we reach the bottom of the spiraling stairwell. Before us, another straight away. I think I may see a rather large doorway ahead, but the gloom is too much. I cannot tell for certain.

I was genuinely curious as to the lack of traps so far. We had been wandering blindly for a good twenty minutes or so, you would think that the ancients would-

*ka-snip*

Oh dear.

Un blasted tripwire! A rather large axe bursts out of a hidden wall compartment, swinging in such an arch that it clearly seeks to pin me up as a new wall decoration. How quaint. I barely see the blade coming, but that doesn't mean I have time to avoid it. I start to-

OOF!

All the wind is knocked out of my stomach as Colonel Jan Templar tackles me from behind, knocking me out of the reach of death's scythe. The huge axe sinks into the old stone of the wall, making a loud, screeching, crashing racket as it does. Dust shakes from the ceiling at the impact of the blow. We are all silent for a moment. IRIS floats curiously above my head, torch in hand. Crow raises an eyebrow at my prone figure. Jan rises, offering me a hand up as he does so. I nod my thanks. Just as we are about to calmly take our leave, we hear something else.

A sound I have never heard of before, and hope I never will again. Behind us, in the direction of the staircase, a guttural roar consistent of something akin to pain and suffering. And then, a second beastly screech. I assume this one is a death threat.

"Down the hall! Now!"

Jan yells, pointing down the corridor. He does not have to tell me twice. Boomhilda in hand, I make a break for the end of the passageway. As IRIS' light floats forward, I see that there is indeed a large stone doorway at the end. Two statues of archaic creatures border the entrance. Hopefully there are not more of these beasts waiting ahead.We take off at a dead sprint, huffing and puffing like steam engines. Another roar - it's getting closer.

I was not foolish enough to think that that axe was the only danger in this long stretch of hallway. I simply do not care at this current moment. Adrenaline mounting, our merry band sets off all manner of lethal traps. Spikes jumping out from walls, darts laced with no doubt some ancient poison, another axe or three, and even a verdammt flamethrower! Yes, at the end of the passage, Crow is the first to make it through the door, but not before stepping on a pressure plate that caused flames to erupt from maws of those insipid stone carvings! I cry out, at the last minute executing a dolphin dive over the top of the fire. I slide into my landing. I stand up, only to find that ACH SCHEIßE I AM ON FIRE!

I quickly pat out the flames on my outfit, lucky that none had caught on my skin. I look around, only to find that Crow has positioned himself on a lever. What it does, I cannot even hope to know.

"Come on with it Lads!"

He hurries the others on. IRIS, for all it is worth, simply floats hurriedly through, paying no mind to the flames. Jan dives over the flames similar to the way I did, and our Nephilim friend simply vaults over the fire, strange girl in his arms. He lands in a crouch, very dramatically. Crow pulls the lever, and a large stone slab slams into the ground where the doorway once was. Another monstrous howl that sickens mein stomach.

I think I prefer the undead.

I take a glance at our fearless Captain.

"How did you know that lever would save us?"

"I didn't."

Well there you have it.

I take a moment to glaze over this new room. IRIS' torch illuminates most of it, but not all. We are in a large circular chamber, much like the one that we all first encountered with the main group. However, as our robotic companion floats around, I see...bleachers? What? Was this some sort of stadium? I look around more, and see a raised stone protrusion on the far wall. At the top sits very elaborately carved stone chair. A throne perhaps?

We all take a moment to assess whatever new scars the traps had left us. An axe caught my left shoulder. I have a rather nasty gash to match the bruise on my right. Wunderbar. I also tripped and fell in the initial moments of my sprinting, causing a burning scrape on my right knee.

I begin to check on the status of the others, but am interrupted by more pressing matters. There is a very loud, very admittedly terrifying banging on the stone door. Then, another bloodcurdling roar.

Frantically, we all begin to search for an exit, some way that we can escape having to fight this monstrosity in our current conditions.

Suddenly, un VERDAMMT AXE breaks through the stone door! That bastard has ripped an axe out of the wall and is breaking down the door with it as if it was wood! The search becomes even more frantic, and both Jan and Grave suggest fighting the beast. That is, until I see an option. Our only option.

"IRIS! Go pull that lever!"

I point to a lever sitting atop the wall protrusion, next to the stone throne. IRIS nods that she understands, and quickly flies off to carryout the order. I do not know what it will do, but it is better than-

krakak-chank

Before I know what is happening, the ground gives way beneath my feet, and with the screams of my falling companions, I shout to the robot,

"FALSCHE HEBEL!"

Translations:
Verdammt = Fucking
Ach mein Gott = Oh my god
Falsche Hebel = Wrong Lever
SCHEIßE = FUCK/SHIT
Wunderbar = wonderful/great