Let's Read: Book Club #1

[Thaal Sinestro]

So I can't write in the field, but sometimes I can read. Because I'm writing on my phone, I expect there to be autocorrect errors, but I'll try to catch them. That said, I caught up on some reading lately.

Of Kings, Gods, and Girls
I'm really glad I had a chance to catch up on this. I've missed a lot since my departure (obviously), so it was good to see what Ganny D had been up to since then. No good, obviously.

I really liked this story. The characters came through very powerfully, and getting to know them was really interesting. The plotline was a character study more than anything else, which is awesome. The pace was calm, the progression untethered from the traditional arc, but I never got tired of reading it. So good work there, to all parties.

The first thing I gotta say to Gan is EDITING. I know it's a passion in the ass and usually takes more time that actually writing the damn thing. I'm really bad for editing also. But you've got a ton if writing chops, and it super dicks when your amazing skills get snubbed because you didn't give it a once over. Obviously things may have changed between then and now, but I'm reviewing your old stuff :p The wrist if this is actually the post the link goes to, which has some major issues in the first paragraph.

Enel, I loved getting to read more of your stuff. Your work with this character is really different, and it's gotta be HARD writing like that. One thing I'd look for from you is for you too SHOW and not TELL. I'm really harsh on exposition, and a lot if the key parts of your sorry coke from outright saying what you're doing. Instead, explain WHAT is happening in a way that makes it apparent WHY is happening. It's hard to strike that balance, but trying out more of that style for Enel might spare your writing from having to constantly remind us that he thinks he's god. That's more just a stylistic choice, but I think that just SHOWING more would be nice.

One thing I'd like to see from both of you is more terrain use during your fight. I loved that the statue was used, but it had the feeling if a void that they were fighting in. How did the people around them react? What did the lightning bolts hit? How did they use their surroundings? I know it was in the garden by the river, but that's about it.

Overall, I really really really enjoyed this thread. I'm excited to read more and get more involved with the members of LAW as it forms.

(The other reviews will follow this one as I find time to write them)