A Criminal Elf, a Street Artist, and a Ninja Walk into a Bar

[Dr. McNinja]

RRAAGHH

"Please tell me that's on my side, please tell me that's on my side..."

Ninjas were still assaulting him as Doc threw himself off of a rigged branch. As it exploded behind him, the physician gripped a branch that was below him and used it to swing his legs around in a circle, kicking all of the attacking ninjas. He then leaped along several trees, running up and down trees, until he reached the source of the roar. As he approached the source, he started hearing slashes and screams of pain.

Doc looked down from a branch, and noticed the litter of bloody, broken ninja bodies. Incidentally, a feral giant raged on a nearby tree, with blue-ish black skin and (in Dr. McNinja's professional opinion, unhealthily long) claws. It had spiky hair that slicked back like Jak's. It had Jak's goggles and- okay it was Jak. But the Jak that McNinja had met was not this rabid. He had met a remorseful, serious man with serious guilt issues. Besides the outfit and the annoying squirrel on his shoulder, Jak was nigh unrecognizable. This couldn't be Jak.

"Unless he's a werewolf," Doc pondered, punching another assaulter without lifting his eyes, "I suppose that could happen too."

"RAAAGH!" were-Jak seemed to reply. He picked up a nearby ninja with his claws and chucked him at Doc. In response, McNinja boosted off of the branch, but kept his feet hooked around the branch and swung his whole weight under it. Hanging upside down, ("LIKE BATMAN" "no, not like Batman") Doc grinned goofily at Jak.

"Hey, Jak!" he cheerfully exclaimed, "Nice to see you again. Didn't know you were a werewolf!"

"I'm... gonna kill... ALL OF YOU!" Jak growled. This time, he stuck his claws through another offending ninja and chucked him at Doc too. Doc let go of the branch and used another to swing over to were-Jak.

"Whoa there, Jak, you might need to slow down!" Doc ducked as Jak tried to slash his face. "It's me, Dr. McNinja! Doc! I fixed your arm!... not really." Doc leaned to the right to avoid another blow. "I'd really appreciate if you could calm down a bit-"

Jak threw a punch. Dr. McNinja slipped under and jabbed right under the elbow. Jak roared in pain, then looked bewildered at seeing that his arm could no longer move.

"Remind you of anything?" Doc whispered. He could feel the hostile ninjas gather up for a third wave.

"Doc..." Jak growled.

"Heya, nurse!" Daxter shouted.

"I'm a doctor- you know what? Never mind, I don't care about you, you beaver," Doc grumbled, "Jak! It's nice to meet you! We should totally catch up. When we're not... you know..."

Doc drew his katana again. Jak started growling. The third wave had revealed itself. It was the biggest they had seen yet. There was no way the good doctor could have fought this by himself. Luckily, this time, he had his old ally.

"Just like old times, eh?" Doc grinned, then grimaced. "Weeeell it's not that old, seeing as it was more or less yesterday, but it's pretty old. ...I think."

Jak looked at him confusedly. Daxter sighed. "He's not that good with words sometimes when he's like this."

Doc rolled his eyes. "Alright... Well, Jak?"

Jak snorted and looked at the physician, who grinned.

"Smash."

The bestial form of Jak Mar smiled a toothy grin, then charged forward in a blast of dark energy. Doc similarly lunged a few meters high into the air. Crying out, "Lucky Seven!" he chucked four shuriken, two with each hand, at the ninjas who were attempting to attack his ally from the back. They all landed their mark. Doc landed and casually stuck his sword into the abdomen of another assassin.

"Eckhart was right," he commented, slashing another ninja's head off, "It does feel a lot better if you say the name out loud."

He pulled the sword out and slashed a bunch of assassins, curious to see how Jak would fight in his new state.