(Pre-Show) The Lobby

[Monkey D. Luffy]

"Lots of pirates keep their spoils locked away in vaults, I thought there'd be gold n' stuff, but it's just a dumb . . . uhm, elevator, whatever that is," Straw Hat grumbled in chagrin, his expression drooping into a pouty scowl.

Ah! Of course! Treasure was the lowest tier of hierarchic ambition which led him to such an ostentatious dick-measuring contest. Hefting himself up from the stainless floor, Luffy's emblematic, aloof grin returned as he surveyed the lobby.

"I jumped into this looking for information, but while we're here, may as well have some fun. How 'bout it panther guy?" The pirate captain proposed, proffering a hand as aid in lifting the stumpy critter to his boots.

Oh boy! P-panther? Seriously? Not even remotely close . . The mouse ruminated, fuddled by his new acquaintance's astounding lack of zoological diagnostic prowess. Nonetheless, he smeared a fallacious smile and accepted the youth's invitation, "Right! Let's be off."

******

Gromnomnom! Shlurrrp!

The bizarre doublet packed themselves to the brim with scads of fine cuisines and sparkling libations within the gratuitous recreation saloon. Less fortunately, when Ears began hacking on a jammed chunk of bone, Luffy displayed savvy medical expertise as he ceaselessly rammed the mouse's head into the table's skirting marble edge until the hunk jostled free.

******

Fwip, Flutter, Fwip.

Straw Hat lazed back in his cushioned chair to enjoy a snooze as Ears flipped through page after page, bitterly tossing yet another tome of irrelevance upon a swelling pile of hardcover literature.

Plucking the heaviest novel he could muster from the heap, the mouse pitched it right into Luffy's lax mug, bursting a snot bubble and rattling the pirate awake in a frantic scramble. "I'm studying this darn tootin' research for your benefit as well you know!"

******

Shhkoooom!

Jumping to the Central Park quadrant, both thrill-seekers zipped down a frigid snow mound on rental skis, with the more aerodynamic Ears taking the lead. Not to be outdone so effortlessly, Luffy stretched his arm and grasped an exposed tree branch, acting as a makeshift clothesline.

Thinking brashly on his boots, the pint-sized mouse tucked his head, eluding the saboteur's appendage by the fur on his dome. Vengefully, Ears swiveled his legs and skid along the brisk white powder, casting a billow of icy munition into Straw Hat's kisser.

"Oooowoawoawoaw" He shrieked with hindered sight before tumbling over. Mugiwara hurdled down the mountainside and rolled into a mammoth snowball before inevitably slamming into the enclosing barricade. Minutes following, his impish assailant arrived to tug him out of the compacted mass. Ensuingly, the duo giggled in hysteria.

"Ohohoho, this place is a hoot, where to next?" Ears petitioned, sweeping frosted particles from his smock.

"Kahahaha! Let's check out the dojo next!"

******

Smitten with elation, Luffy sustained satirical ignorance of this game's true purpose of ill intentions. Contrarily, deep within the recesses of his subconscious mind, a sinister force had taken root, burrowing into his psyche. The dauntless pirate's abrupt shift in countenance evidenced his subliminal arrest.

Daft half-wit, you truly believe this to be a game? Frolicking around carelessly as others prepare for the bloodshed that lies ahead. Soon that bitter crimson shall forever stain your hands, and I shall relish in knowing there is nothing you can do to prevent it. I am you, and soon you will be me. I will foster your negative emotions, nurture them, mature them. You cannot see me. You cannot touch me. You cannot stop me. Gehgehgehgeh!

"Guhh! . . . huff . . huff . . the heck . . . what . . was that?!"