04-16-2015, 09:06 PM
Chapter 4: Revisitation
"Fags," Squirtle muttered as he disembarked the lonely ship. From behind the Tiny Turtle, the dismembered corpses of the crew and tourists lay on the bloodstained deck of the ship. The Pokémon had been willing to stay in the hull of the vessel for a week or so, but after a while, he got tired of eating dried foods and opted for the flesh and muscle of the crew. Once he decided on that option, it had only been a matter of massacring the hundred or so men, woman, and children on board.
Fishing a tiny toothpick whittled from a teenager’s femur, the amphibious superstar took a moment to pick out a tiny shard of meat from between two of his teeth. With a snicker, the azure reptile threw the pick into the nearby waters and took his first steps onto the elaborate, wooden pier. A few feet away, Squirtle eyed a battalion of troops marching down the wharf in full military regalia.
Sighing inwardly, the Pokémon reached behind his shoulders and removed his two machineguns from their location on his carapace. Depressing the triggers simultaneously, the turtle cut down the squadron in a hail of gunfire—reducing them to corpses in a rather minute timeframe. Without so much as a passing glance, Squirtle walked through the mound of corpses and vanished into a nearby ally before he was seen by any more morons with guns.
Once he had made his way out of the street, the Tiny Turtle spotted a nearby manhole and grinned. With relative ease, the Water Pokémon pried the manhole lid off and slipped into the sewer. Dropping onto the stone walkway that bordered the flow of waste and sewage, Squirtle slid his machineguns into his holsters and began down the damp, smelly canal. The reptilian insurrectionist understood what he had to do next: conquer. The only way to achieve that would be to locate the poor and destitute and whip them into a feverish, bloodthirsty mob.
Squirtle rounded a corner and encountered a homeless man living inside a mangy cardboard box. Gliding forward, the turtle lunged at the hominid and slammed him to the cold, stone floor. Before the victim had a chance to react to the attack, the Tiny Turtle drove his foot into the man’s throat and aimed one of his guns at the primate’s skull.
“You are going to give me some information that I require, or I am going to murder you in a rather painful manner,” Squirtle sneered as the frail man attempted to free himself from beneath the muscular, blue foot. “Tell me where there is a Pokémon Center! Tell me!”
“There is one at the corner of Fifth and Wabash. It’s three manholes south of here,” the vermin screamed. “Now let me—” the man’s sniveling was silenced by the destruction of his brain by a single round from the Pokémon’s gun. A sigh escaped the cyan lizard’s mouth as the sight of the expanding pool of blood and brain matter expanded slowly. Squirtle had kept his end of the bargain—he had killed the man in a quick and painless fashion.
Turning away from the corpse, the amphibious superstar began down the tunnel in the direction that the decrepit hominid had sent him. A minute or so later, the Tiny Turtle arrived at the ladder that his informant had designated. With jubilation, Squirtle ascended the aged, damp ladder and emerged once again onto the streets of the city. From his location in the middle of the road, he could easily spot out the Pokémon Center that the man living in the sewers had detailed.
Walking over to the bay window in front of the center, the azure reptile peaked through the glass and frowned. A pink-haired nurse could be seen pacing behind a counter as she tended to the customers that were filing through the accursed structure. Machinery behind her was whirling away endlessly and tirelessly. The Pokémon frowned as he contemplated his next course of action.
One way or another, Squirtle understood that liberating those imprisoned within the Pokémon Center would have to be his primary objective. If the amphibious revolutionary could free the destitute from their shackles, then he knew he would be able to advance his plot to save the city from the parasite known as Homo sapiens. First matters first, Squirtle would need assistance if he wanted to consider attacking such an installation.
Turning away from the temple of enslavement, the Tiny Turtle entered the alley behind the structure and began to hum to himself. He was still absorbed in the sheer fact that he had made it to the city after such a long and arduous journey; however, in the end, Squirtle did not doubt his prowess. From his time spent with Red Mage, the cyan lizard understood that he truly was awesome in every way, shape, and form. The turtle planned to display this by ascending to the position of power he was born to hold.
Squirtle awoke from a few hours of slumber and stretched his limbs as a sigh escaped his lips. The Tiny Turtle smiled as he checked the condition of his guns and tightened the cloth pads he wore around his joints. The Pokémon had snuck into a condemned structure in order to rest his head without the threat of someone stumbling upon him and attempting to capture him. After all, those god damned trainers abounded in this city, and they had a penchant for preying on the sleeping and unwary.
“They can be a bitch, can’t they?” The voice invaded the turtle’s mind and immediately caused him to draw his guns and stand at attention.
“Show yourself, fucker!” Squirtle roared vehemently. His tiny digits were poised and ready to send a twin stream of bullets straight through whoever had thought it funny to sneak up on him in a badly illuminated structure.
“By all means, Squirtle, I am not your foe,” the figure said in a calm voice as it stepped out from the shadows that choked the room. A smile spread across the turtle’s face as he realized that his guest was another Pokémon. The newcomer stood a little higher then Squirtle and bore a much more humanoid style to his figure. His skin was a light yellow color with a red star on the center of his forehead. A fox-like tail and set of similarly fashioned ears adorned his form, and his thorax was coated in a dense, brown plate. In his clawed, three-fingered right hand was a simple spoon.
“A Kadabra?” Squirtle said with the faintest traces of a smile on his cyan visage. “I suppose that would give some explanation as to how you’ve managed to pick up on my thoughts,” the comment elicited a smile from the physic Pokémon, who simply used his free hand to twirl around one of the moustache-like extensions that shoot off from the sides of his snout.
“You’ll have to pardon my lack of introductions, but I was so wrapped up in the immense hate and insanity that saturates your mind. Despite the degree of it, I found myself interested in the grand design of your scheming,” Squirtle smiled as the Kadabra bowed before him. “You are superior to me even with my mastery of the mind. I am enlisted to your cause, and I will not fail you and your quest to liberate our race from the oppressive rule of mankind.”
“What is the full scale of your telekinetic prowess, Kadabra?” The Water Pokémon asked, smiling from ear to ear. His new lackey grinned as his free hand extended toward a dusty chair lying a few feet away. As Squirtle watched, the wooden object began to quiver until it was lifted into the air and subsequently torn asunder. The display only made the amphibious revolutionary giddy with anticipation to gather more forces under this banner.
“Once I evolved again I will be at the pinnacle of my physic domination,” Kadabra said, his usually monotone voice sounding uncharacteristically infused with excitement. “I recommend that we travel to the slums and recruit some of the Pokémon who are running free. They are trying to survive outside the centers, so if we acquire the means to successfully nourish them, we should gain their trust and assistance in your crusade.”
“Then I suppose our first step should be to ransack on of the small corner stores?” Squirtle asked, making his way outside the structure and onto the moonlight streets. “Actually we should just murder the staff at the warehousing portion of the dock and use the ratios and imports there to fuel the homeless,” the turtle said with a smile as he bathed in the brilliance of his plan.
“Excellent plan, Chieftain,” Kadabra’s last word triggered the cyan reptile to turn around and smirk at his follower.
“Chieftain?” Squirtle said, chuckling lightly at the notion.
“If you are going to unite our species then you will require a suitable title, and for the moment, that sounds just fitting,” Kadabra stated, his feet lifting off the ground as he switched over to hovering telekinetically.
“It’ll do,” Squirtle replied with a toothy smile. “Now let’s go annex ourselves a warehouse or two,” the turtle’s subject nodded as his eyes glazed over in a white light, and his speed of movement increased to coincide with it. Sprinting forward, the pair of Pokémon quickly made their way through a network of alleys that connected the intersection of Fifth and Wabash to the city’s pier.
They arrived at their destination after a few minutes and immediately ascended the tallest structure in order to get a clear view of the network of structures they would have to siege. From the roof of the building, the two Pokémon could easily pinpoint which warehouse they needed to assail. A few barges could be spotted anchored near the wharfs that extended from the southern portion of the storage building.
“They’re exporting the goods we seek,” Squirtle murmured with an obvious trace of aggravation apparent in his voice. “We’re going to have to immobilize those three vessels if we want to maximize our spoils,” the turtle added, turning to face his ally and frowning slightly at the notion.
“Let us get moving then, Chieftain,” Kadabra said, putting a hand on the shoulder of his leader. “I shall teleport us, just brace yourself,” before Squirtle had a moment to respond, the pair of Pokémon dematerialized in a flash of white light and reappeared near the south exit of the warehouse.
“You take one vessel, and I will siege the other. Now go!” Kadabra nodded his head and vanished once more as Squirtle leaped onto the side of his vessel and vanished inside an open port.
Sliding through the port window, Squirtle landed on a table where a few people were currently playing cards. The seamen’s yelps of surprise were drowned out by the sounds of their throats being torn out by a rather bloodthirsty turtle. With a few last motions, the amphibious revolutionary bitchslapped the dying men to the ground and made his leave. Drawing his guns as he stepped through the open doorway, the Water Pokémon gunned down every dumb bastard who bothered to rush to see what was happening.
“Come on, fuckers!” The Tiny Turtle roared above the hail of gunfire. “Spend all your time at sea having sex with one another, and you still can not manage to take down one invader. You make me sick!” Switching over to forty-millimeter rounds, Squirtle obliterated both lines of seamen trying to get at him from over the corpses of their allies. The hapless bloodshed only lasted for a few more seconds before the entire vessel fell silent.
Sighing at how much easier it was to murder these fools when compared to the real soldiers he had murdered during the war, the cyan reptile returned his weapons to their holsters on his shell and began toward where the captain would be located. As he made his way through the sea of blood, bone, and biological shrapnel, Squirtle fished out a cigar and lighter from the carnage. Ignoring the fact that either was still usable despite being caught up in the rather one-sided confrontation; the amphibious revolutionary lighted the cigar and took a long puff.
“If that stupid mage was still around he would so be satisfied right now,” the turtle muttered as he made his way onto the deck of the ship. Once out in the open, Squirtle could easily spot the superstructure that would contain the navigation chamber, and with a smile on his face, he sent a volley of grenades into the tiny, elevated room. The screams and flames that ensued were a clear indicator that no one would have any luck navigating the vessel out of port.
Still wearing the malicious smile he always bore proudly upon his countenance, Squirtle descended into the bowels of the ship and proceeded to rape the engine with a rather large beam of steel. Once the machinery was visibly ejaculating massive amounts of oil and fire, the Tiny Turtle left the ship behind and returned to the pier. A few moments later, Kadabra teleported in—covered in a light film of blood and ruined tissue. The physic let out a soft chuckle and turned his attention to the storehouse.
“I recommend that we move the wares to where you were staying near the PokéCenter,” Kadabra started. “We can then move in all of the destitute and form a temporary base of operations before razing the facility, Chieftain,” Squirtle nodded, and took a moment to bust a cap in the ass of a seamen who was approaching the duo with a rather alarmed look on his fag face.
“I’m going to travel to the slums of this metropolis in order to save us more time. Just come find me once you have completed transporting these goods,” with a nod, Kadabra gave his chieftain an angled, Roman salute and teleported into the warehouse. Squirtle smiled once again and began his journey to the slums just a few blocks nearby. Unfortunately for the turtle, his trek was interrupted at the halfway mark by a scraggly, yellow mouse.
“Where are you going in such a hurry?” The frail voice asked as the creature stepped out from nearby box and revealed itself to be one of the destitute Pokémon inhabiting the city. “I haven’t seen a Pokémon so clean and chipper in quite some time,” the words brought a frown to the visage of the amphibious superstar. Taking a puff of his cigar, Squirtle spoke enthusiastically and with a glint to his eyes that conveyed the confidence behind his words.
“Our people have been enslaved by the evils of man for far too long, brother,” the Tiny Turtle began, clenching his fingers and taking a moment to madly glare at the buildings around the pair of strangers. “I seek to unify our fragmented people and bring an end to mankind’s never-ending rape of our homeworld! We are more evolved then those Homo sapiens ever shall be. It is time that we burn this concrete jungle to the ground, and then we shall fertilize the new, unmolested earth with their corpses!”
“Valiant aspirations,” the new Pokémon said with disheartened expression on his furry face. “But what makes you think that you’ll be able to succeed? Man is no pushover, and Pokémon can only do so much, you know?”
“Wrong,” Squirtle stated bluntly. “Separate we can achieve little to nothing, but if we were to unify the different types and species, man would be crippled below our amalgamated might. I was born a tier above the rest, I know this, and I know my potential. I will not fail my people, and I will not fail you. I implore you…join me, Pikachu,” the Tiny Turtle concluded, extending his hand toward the bipedal mouse.
“Anything is better then trying to scrounge for food and avoid those incessant, malignant trainers. I will follow you if it means liberation and an escape from this hellhole,” the words brought yet another smile to the reptilian insurrectionist’s visage—even Squirtle himself never imagined he could be this happy, but the recent victories had worked wonders.
“I’m en route to the slums of this city to save our brothers from the horrid living conditions and supply them with food and sustenance. After I have amassed enough followers, I shall lead us on an assault against a nearby PokéCenter to free those inside. Let us depart immediately,” the Tiny Turtle’s instructions elicited a smirk from the face of the decrepit mouse.
Without so much as another word between the two of them, the pair began toward their designation with look of determination on their faces. Both of them understood the challenge that was waiting upon the horizon, but failure was not an option.
A few hours had passed since the reptile and his mammalian underling had arrived at the expansive slums. After a long, tedious venture, it seemed as if they had managed to amass a great portion of the Pokémon inhabiting the grotesque location. Although most of them had no idea why they were being assembled en masse, a great percentage of the individuals gathered seemed genuinely delighted. From the shadows located near the front of the group, a kid-sized, blue figure stepped forward.
Stepping onto his makeshift lectern, the Water Pokémon stared out into the crowd and estimated the headcount to be near two dozen. The variations and different subspecies of Pokémon accumulated filled the amphibious superstar with great pride and a sense of accomplishment. Taking another long hit off his cigar; Squirtle exhaled the minute cloud of carcinogens and laughed. After all, the Tiny Turtle found it humorous that so many humans partook in such a lethal habit despite being fully aware of the consequences for such horrible hobbies.
The number of deaths relating to tobacco products was constantly on the rise, and it was kind of ironic that Homo sapiens were such a self-destructive species. That is why they will never achieve the evolutionary perfection that Squirtle’s divided, enslaved people have. Man would die out from war and infectious diseases long before they could even hold a match the Pokémon; however, this was a fact that brought only happiness to the “Chieftain.”
“Fuck cancer,” the cyan turtle muttered. In the end, he could smoke as much as he wanted, and because he was a Pokémon, the silly, manmade toxins would have no effect on him. Man may be cancer’s bitch, but cancer would always and forever be Pokémon’s bitch.
“Are you ready, Chieftain?” Pikachu asked from a few feet away. The yellow mouse seemed a lot more chipper and enthused then he had when Squirtle and he first met. Although most of it was because of the bath, the turtle could genuinely see that the Electric Pokémon seemed to be filled with life and vigor once more. The best part was the fact that Squirtle knew he had bestowed Pikachu with such drive and purpose, and the azure reptile intended to instill that same purpose into all of his species.
“Yes,” Squirtle said with a nod and a friendly smile. Sparks of electricity sizzled to life and began to dance painlessly across the mouse’s coat. A moment later, the Electric Mouse threw his hands forward and fired twin bolts of electricity into an old fuse spot light that his reptilian leader had found discarded a few blocks away. Once infused with enough raw power, the device sprung to life and bathed Squirtle in a brilliant glow—illuminating him so that even those in the back of the crowd could see him without strain.
“Comrades!” Squirtle bellowed at the top of his lungs from the milk crate upon which he was performing his disertation. “You may be asking yourselves why you have been assembled in this dank, putrid alley by a Squirtle and Pikachu,” a few whispers in the crowd verified the turtle’s claim. “I come to all of you as a brother-in-arms and as someone who is willing to help lift the curse of fear and poverty that had consumed your daily lives. I am offering you the opportunity to live happily and without having to scrounge around for food just to survive.
“I seek to unify our fragmented, disillusioned people under a sole banner and lash out against the tyrants that have kept us under thumb for generations—Homo sapiens! How many of you have fled for your lives from one of those bastards who wanted to cook you for a meal? How many of you mothers and fathers have watched as you children were stolen away from you by a trainer seeking to enrich his ‘collection’?
“Because I will say this to you, that is all they view us as: Trophies. They trap us in those accursed spheres like we are their pets that do not experience sorrow or pain. That is no way to live at all, comrades, and I will make it so that we live in a world without that fear! How many of you are orphaned now because your parents now spend their lives in a tiny ball. Worse yet, they are brainwashed into warring their own kind and aiding in their enslavement.
“‘Gotta catch ‘em all!’ they say to justify their insatiable appetite for enslaving us, but do you know what I say? Gotta fucking kill ‘am all!” By this point in the speech, Squirtle had begun to subconsciously incorporate a variation of hand gestures as his tone of voice grew from calm to enraged and then back down again. If the turtle would have had a bowl cut of any type, then his gelled bangs would have already fallen out of place a few times by now.
“Will you join me, comrades? Will you help me liberate our people? Will you help me make a world were you will never go hungry again and never have to worry about the safety of your families?” Squirtle’s hands and eyes were extended toward the sky as his speech reached a dramatic and epic conclusion. A few moments passed as the message sunk into the minds of the audience, and then the unbelievable happened—a thunderous applause and chorus of hoots and hollers exploded into the night sky.
The Tiny Turtle had achieved the amazing feat of unifying an economically troubled and disillusioned people by their hatred of mankind. Now it was only a matter of time before Squirtle would be able to bring together the rest of his people and drive man out in a brilliant, euphoric genocide. Actually, when he thought about it for an extended period of time, the Pokémon decided that holocaust was a much more fitting term.
As the turtle was bathed in the adoration he felt something strange consume him…
"Fags," Squirtle muttered as he disembarked the lonely ship. From behind the Tiny Turtle, the dismembered corpses of the crew and tourists lay on the bloodstained deck of the ship. The Pokémon had been willing to stay in the hull of the vessel for a week or so, but after a while, he got tired of eating dried foods and opted for the flesh and muscle of the crew. Once he decided on that option, it had only been a matter of massacring the hundred or so men, woman, and children on board.
Fishing a tiny toothpick whittled from a teenager’s femur, the amphibious superstar took a moment to pick out a tiny shard of meat from between two of his teeth. With a snicker, the azure reptile threw the pick into the nearby waters and took his first steps onto the elaborate, wooden pier. A few feet away, Squirtle eyed a battalion of troops marching down the wharf in full military regalia.
Sighing inwardly, the Pokémon reached behind his shoulders and removed his two machineguns from their location on his carapace. Depressing the triggers simultaneously, the turtle cut down the squadron in a hail of gunfire—reducing them to corpses in a rather minute timeframe. Without so much as a passing glance, Squirtle walked through the mound of corpses and vanished into a nearby ally before he was seen by any more morons with guns.
Once he had made his way out of the street, the Tiny Turtle spotted a nearby manhole and grinned. With relative ease, the Water Pokémon pried the manhole lid off and slipped into the sewer. Dropping onto the stone walkway that bordered the flow of waste and sewage, Squirtle slid his machineguns into his holsters and began down the damp, smelly canal. The reptilian insurrectionist understood what he had to do next: conquer. The only way to achieve that would be to locate the poor and destitute and whip them into a feverish, bloodthirsty mob.
Squirtle rounded a corner and encountered a homeless man living inside a mangy cardboard box. Gliding forward, the turtle lunged at the hominid and slammed him to the cold, stone floor. Before the victim had a chance to react to the attack, the Tiny Turtle drove his foot into the man’s throat and aimed one of his guns at the primate’s skull.
“You are going to give me some information that I require, or I am going to murder you in a rather painful manner,” Squirtle sneered as the frail man attempted to free himself from beneath the muscular, blue foot. “Tell me where there is a Pokémon Center! Tell me!”
“There is one at the corner of Fifth and Wabash. It’s three manholes south of here,” the vermin screamed. “Now let me—” the man’s sniveling was silenced by the destruction of his brain by a single round from the Pokémon’s gun. A sigh escaped the cyan lizard’s mouth as the sight of the expanding pool of blood and brain matter expanded slowly. Squirtle had kept his end of the bargain—he had killed the man in a quick and painless fashion.
Turning away from the corpse, the amphibious superstar began down the tunnel in the direction that the decrepit hominid had sent him. A minute or so later, the Tiny Turtle arrived at the ladder that his informant had designated. With jubilation, Squirtle ascended the aged, damp ladder and emerged once again onto the streets of the city. From his location in the middle of the road, he could easily spot out the Pokémon Center that the man living in the sewers had detailed.
Walking over to the bay window in front of the center, the azure reptile peaked through the glass and frowned. A pink-haired nurse could be seen pacing behind a counter as she tended to the customers that were filing through the accursed structure. Machinery behind her was whirling away endlessly and tirelessly. The Pokémon frowned as he contemplated his next course of action.
One way or another, Squirtle understood that liberating those imprisoned within the Pokémon Center would have to be his primary objective. If the amphibious revolutionary could free the destitute from their shackles, then he knew he would be able to advance his plot to save the city from the parasite known as Homo sapiens. First matters first, Squirtle would need assistance if he wanted to consider attacking such an installation.
Turning away from the temple of enslavement, the Tiny Turtle entered the alley behind the structure and began to hum to himself. He was still absorbed in the sheer fact that he had made it to the city after such a long and arduous journey; however, in the end, Squirtle did not doubt his prowess. From his time spent with Red Mage, the cyan lizard understood that he truly was awesome in every way, shape, and form. The turtle planned to display this by ascending to the position of power he was born to hold.
***
Squirtle awoke from a few hours of slumber and stretched his limbs as a sigh escaped his lips. The Tiny Turtle smiled as he checked the condition of his guns and tightened the cloth pads he wore around his joints. The Pokémon had snuck into a condemned structure in order to rest his head without the threat of someone stumbling upon him and attempting to capture him. After all, those god damned trainers abounded in this city, and they had a penchant for preying on the sleeping and unwary.
“They can be a bitch, can’t they?” The voice invaded the turtle’s mind and immediately caused him to draw his guns and stand at attention.
“Show yourself, fucker!” Squirtle roared vehemently. His tiny digits were poised and ready to send a twin stream of bullets straight through whoever had thought it funny to sneak up on him in a badly illuminated structure.
“By all means, Squirtle, I am not your foe,” the figure said in a calm voice as it stepped out from the shadows that choked the room. A smile spread across the turtle’s face as he realized that his guest was another Pokémon. The newcomer stood a little higher then Squirtle and bore a much more humanoid style to his figure. His skin was a light yellow color with a red star on the center of his forehead. A fox-like tail and set of similarly fashioned ears adorned his form, and his thorax was coated in a dense, brown plate. In his clawed, three-fingered right hand was a simple spoon.
“A Kadabra?” Squirtle said with the faintest traces of a smile on his cyan visage. “I suppose that would give some explanation as to how you’ve managed to pick up on my thoughts,” the comment elicited a smile from the physic Pokémon, who simply used his free hand to twirl around one of the moustache-like extensions that shoot off from the sides of his snout.
“You’ll have to pardon my lack of introductions, but I was so wrapped up in the immense hate and insanity that saturates your mind. Despite the degree of it, I found myself interested in the grand design of your scheming,” Squirtle smiled as the Kadabra bowed before him. “You are superior to me even with my mastery of the mind. I am enlisted to your cause, and I will not fail you and your quest to liberate our race from the oppressive rule of mankind.”
“What is the full scale of your telekinetic prowess, Kadabra?” The Water Pokémon asked, smiling from ear to ear. His new lackey grinned as his free hand extended toward a dusty chair lying a few feet away. As Squirtle watched, the wooden object began to quiver until it was lifted into the air and subsequently torn asunder. The display only made the amphibious revolutionary giddy with anticipation to gather more forces under this banner.
“Once I evolved again I will be at the pinnacle of my physic domination,” Kadabra said, his usually monotone voice sounding uncharacteristically infused with excitement. “I recommend that we travel to the slums and recruit some of the Pokémon who are running free. They are trying to survive outside the centers, so if we acquire the means to successfully nourish them, we should gain their trust and assistance in your crusade.”
“Then I suppose our first step should be to ransack on of the small corner stores?” Squirtle asked, making his way outside the structure and onto the moonlight streets. “Actually we should just murder the staff at the warehousing portion of the dock and use the ratios and imports there to fuel the homeless,” the turtle said with a smile as he bathed in the brilliance of his plan.
“Excellent plan, Chieftain,” Kadabra’s last word triggered the cyan reptile to turn around and smirk at his follower.
“Chieftain?” Squirtle said, chuckling lightly at the notion.
“If you are going to unite our species then you will require a suitable title, and for the moment, that sounds just fitting,” Kadabra stated, his feet lifting off the ground as he switched over to hovering telekinetically.
“It’ll do,” Squirtle replied with a toothy smile. “Now let’s go annex ourselves a warehouse or two,” the turtle’s subject nodded as his eyes glazed over in a white light, and his speed of movement increased to coincide with it. Sprinting forward, the pair of Pokémon quickly made their way through a network of alleys that connected the intersection of Fifth and Wabash to the city’s pier.
They arrived at their destination after a few minutes and immediately ascended the tallest structure in order to get a clear view of the network of structures they would have to siege. From the roof of the building, the two Pokémon could easily pinpoint which warehouse they needed to assail. A few barges could be spotted anchored near the wharfs that extended from the southern portion of the storage building.
“They’re exporting the goods we seek,” Squirtle murmured with an obvious trace of aggravation apparent in his voice. “We’re going to have to immobilize those three vessels if we want to maximize our spoils,” the turtle added, turning to face his ally and frowning slightly at the notion.
“Let us get moving then, Chieftain,” Kadabra said, putting a hand on the shoulder of his leader. “I shall teleport us, just brace yourself,” before Squirtle had a moment to respond, the pair of Pokémon dematerialized in a flash of white light and reappeared near the south exit of the warehouse.
“You take one vessel, and I will siege the other. Now go!” Kadabra nodded his head and vanished once more as Squirtle leaped onto the side of his vessel and vanished inside an open port.
Sliding through the port window, Squirtle landed on a table where a few people were currently playing cards. The seamen’s yelps of surprise were drowned out by the sounds of their throats being torn out by a rather bloodthirsty turtle. With a few last motions, the amphibious revolutionary bitchslapped the dying men to the ground and made his leave. Drawing his guns as he stepped through the open doorway, the Water Pokémon gunned down every dumb bastard who bothered to rush to see what was happening.
“Come on, fuckers!” The Tiny Turtle roared above the hail of gunfire. “Spend all your time at sea having sex with one another, and you still can not manage to take down one invader. You make me sick!” Switching over to forty-millimeter rounds, Squirtle obliterated both lines of seamen trying to get at him from over the corpses of their allies. The hapless bloodshed only lasted for a few more seconds before the entire vessel fell silent.
Sighing at how much easier it was to murder these fools when compared to the real soldiers he had murdered during the war, the cyan reptile returned his weapons to their holsters on his shell and began toward where the captain would be located. As he made his way through the sea of blood, bone, and biological shrapnel, Squirtle fished out a cigar and lighter from the carnage. Ignoring the fact that either was still usable despite being caught up in the rather one-sided confrontation; the amphibious revolutionary lighted the cigar and took a long puff.
“If that stupid mage was still around he would so be satisfied right now,” the turtle muttered as he made his way onto the deck of the ship. Once out in the open, Squirtle could easily spot the superstructure that would contain the navigation chamber, and with a smile on his face, he sent a volley of grenades into the tiny, elevated room. The screams and flames that ensued were a clear indicator that no one would have any luck navigating the vessel out of port.
Still wearing the malicious smile he always bore proudly upon his countenance, Squirtle descended into the bowels of the ship and proceeded to rape the engine with a rather large beam of steel. Once the machinery was visibly ejaculating massive amounts of oil and fire, the Tiny Turtle left the ship behind and returned to the pier. A few moments later, Kadabra teleported in—covered in a light film of blood and ruined tissue. The physic let out a soft chuckle and turned his attention to the storehouse.
“I recommend that we move the wares to where you were staying near the PokéCenter,” Kadabra started. “We can then move in all of the destitute and form a temporary base of operations before razing the facility, Chieftain,” Squirtle nodded, and took a moment to bust a cap in the ass of a seamen who was approaching the duo with a rather alarmed look on his fag face.
“I’m going to travel to the slums of this metropolis in order to save us more time. Just come find me once you have completed transporting these goods,” with a nod, Kadabra gave his chieftain an angled, Roman salute and teleported into the warehouse. Squirtle smiled once again and began his journey to the slums just a few blocks nearby. Unfortunately for the turtle, his trek was interrupted at the halfway mark by a scraggly, yellow mouse.
“Where are you going in such a hurry?” The frail voice asked as the creature stepped out from nearby box and revealed itself to be one of the destitute Pokémon inhabiting the city. “I haven’t seen a Pokémon so clean and chipper in quite some time,” the words brought a frown to the visage of the amphibious superstar. Taking a puff of his cigar, Squirtle spoke enthusiastically and with a glint to his eyes that conveyed the confidence behind his words.
“Our people have been enslaved by the evils of man for far too long, brother,” the Tiny Turtle began, clenching his fingers and taking a moment to madly glare at the buildings around the pair of strangers. “I seek to unify our fragmented people and bring an end to mankind’s never-ending rape of our homeworld! We are more evolved then those Homo sapiens ever shall be. It is time that we burn this concrete jungle to the ground, and then we shall fertilize the new, unmolested earth with their corpses!”
“Valiant aspirations,” the new Pokémon said with disheartened expression on his furry face. “But what makes you think that you’ll be able to succeed? Man is no pushover, and Pokémon can only do so much, you know?”
“Wrong,” Squirtle stated bluntly. “Separate we can achieve little to nothing, but if we were to unify the different types and species, man would be crippled below our amalgamated might. I was born a tier above the rest, I know this, and I know my potential. I will not fail my people, and I will not fail you. I implore you…join me, Pikachu,” the Tiny Turtle concluded, extending his hand toward the bipedal mouse.
“Anything is better then trying to scrounge for food and avoid those incessant, malignant trainers. I will follow you if it means liberation and an escape from this hellhole,” the words brought yet another smile to the reptilian insurrectionist’s visage—even Squirtle himself never imagined he could be this happy, but the recent victories had worked wonders.
“I’m en route to the slums of this city to save our brothers from the horrid living conditions and supply them with food and sustenance. After I have amassed enough followers, I shall lead us on an assault against a nearby PokéCenter to free those inside. Let us depart immediately,” the Tiny Turtle’s instructions elicited a smirk from the face of the decrepit mouse.
Without so much as another word between the two of them, the pair began toward their designation with look of determination on their faces. Both of them understood the challenge that was waiting upon the horizon, but failure was not an option.
***
A few hours had passed since the reptile and his mammalian underling had arrived at the expansive slums. After a long, tedious venture, it seemed as if they had managed to amass a great portion of the Pokémon inhabiting the grotesque location. Although most of them had no idea why they were being assembled en masse, a great percentage of the individuals gathered seemed genuinely delighted. From the shadows located near the front of the group, a kid-sized, blue figure stepped forward.
Stepping onto his makeshift lectern, the Water Pokémon stared out into the crowd and estimated the headcount to be near two dozen. The variations and different subspecies of Pokémon accumulated filled the amphibious superstar with great pride and a sense of accomplishment. Taking another long hit off his cigar; Squirtle exhaled the minute cloud of carcinogens and laughed. After all, the Tiny Turtle found it humorous that so many humans partook in such a lethal habit despite being fully aware of the consequences for such horrible hobbies.
The number of deaths relating to tobacco products was constantly on the rise, and it was kind of ironic that Homo sapiens were such a self-destructive species. That is why they will never achieve the evolutionary perfection that Squirtle’s divided, enslaved people have. Man would die out from war and infectious diseases long before they could even hold a match the Pokémon; however, this was a fact that brought only happiness to the “Chieftain.”
“Fuck cancer,” the cyan turtle muttered. In the end, he could smoke as much as he wanted, and because he was a Pokémon, the silly, manmade toxins would have no effect on him. Man may be cancer’s bitch, but cancer would always and forever be Pokémon’s bitch.
“Are you ready, Chieftain?” Pikachu asked from a few feet away. The yellow mouse seemed a lot more chipper and enthused then he had when Squirtle and he first met. Although most of it was because of the bath, the turtle could genuinely see that the Electric Pokémon seemed to be filled with life and vigor once more. The best part was the fact that Squirtle knew he had bestowed Pikachu with such drive and purpose, and the azure reptile intended to instill that same purpose into all of his species.
“Yes,” Squirtle said with a nod and a friendly smile. Sparks of electricity sizzled to life and began to dance painlessly across the mouse’s coat. A moment later, the Electric Mouse threw his hands forward and fired twin bolts of electricity into an old fuse spot light that his reptilian leader had found discarded a few blocks away. Once infused with enough raw power, the device sprung to life and bathed Squirtle in a brilliant glow—illuminating him so that even those in the back of the crowd could see him without strain.
“Comrades!” Squirtle bellowed at the top of his lungs from the milk crate upon which he was performing his disertation. “You may be asking yourselves why you have been assembled in this dank, putrid alley by a Squirtle and Pikachu,” a few whispers in the crowd verified the turtle’s claim. “I come to all of you as a brother-in-arms and as someone who is willing to help lift the curse of fear and poverty that had consumed your daily lives. I am offering you the opportunity to live happily and without having to scrounge around for food just to survive.
“I seek to unify our fragmented, disillusioned people under a sole banner and lash out against the tyrants that have kept us under thumb for generations—Homo sapiens! How many of you have fled for your lives from one of those bastards who wanted to cook you for a meal? How many of you mothers and fathers have watched as you children were stolen away from you by a trainer seeking to enrich his ‘collection’?
“Because I will say this to you, that is all they view us as: Trophies. They trap us in those accursed spheres like we are their pets that do not experience sorrow or pain. That is no way to live at all, comrades, and I will make it so that we live in a world without that fear! How many of you are orphaned now because your parents now spend their lives in a tiny ball. Worse yet, they are brainwashed into warring their own kind and aiding in their enslavement.
“‘Gotta catch ‘em all!’ they say to justify their insatiable appetite for enslaving us, but do you know what I say? Gotta fucking kill ‘am all!” By this point in the speech, Squirtle had begun to subconsciously incorporate a variation of hand gestures as his tone of voice grew from calm to enraged and then back down again. If the turtle would have had a bowl cut of any type, then his gelled bangs would have already fallen out of place a few times by now.
“Will you join me, comrades? Will you help me liberate our people? Will you help me make a world were you will never go hungry again and never have to worry about the safety of your families?” Squirtle’s hands and eyes were extended toward the sky as his speech reached a dramatic and epic conclusion. A few moments passed as the message sunk into the minds of the audience, and then the unbelievable happened—a thunderous applause and chorus of hoots and hollers exploded into the night sky.
The Tiny Turtle had achieved the amazing feat of unifying an economically troubled and disillusioned people by their hatred of mankind. Now it was only a matter of time before Squirtle would be able to bring together the rest of his people and drive man out in a brilliant, euphoric genocide. Actually, when he thought about it for an extended period of time, the Pokémon decided that holocaust was a much more fitting term.
As the turtle was bathed in the adoration he felt something strange consume him…