05-26-2018, 04:23 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-01-2018, 10:42 AM by Bandit With No Name.)
Caret flexed her leg back and forth in the passenger’s seat, running her hand over the fresh, new flesh that had replaced the heavy chunk of metal that had been there only hours before. The desert whipped by her window, sand and a cloud of dust kicking up from behind the massive truck. As a wheel fell into a deep hole the entire cabin swayed, a large metallic clank following after. “I’ve really gotta get the suspension in this thing fixed,” the young mechanic chimed passively.
“Yeah,” the driver responded, “we can get it soon.”
Caret looked at the bandit, who wore a look almost devoid of emotion. It was strange, seeing her like this, oddly serene. Seeing her at all, really, after all this time. “So where are we going?”
No response this time.
Caret sighed and looked out into the sands. Wreckages, which she would have begged to stop at only a few weeks ago, whizzed by. The badlands stretched in every direction, and there didn’t seem to be any sign of life in the immediate area. Still, long plumes of smoke streaked up into the sky, reminding her that she could never escape the truth of the marauders that were nestled into almost every nook and cranny of her accursed homeland.
“We’re gonna get the hell out of here for a little bit,” the woman said finally, her eyes still locked on the road. “I had never left the Dunes before I got brought back. I’m sure I never would have. I woulda lived and died in this fuckin’ place.” She let off the gas and shifted, the angry roar of the truck filling the cab for a moment. “You deserve to see what else is out there.”
“I mean, no, don’t worry about that,” Caret said softly. “Don’t make travel plans for me.”
The woman smiled softly. “Why the hell not? It’s not like I’ve got any plans.”
Caret stared at her lap. “I guess.”
“There are whole other verses out there. Whole new worlds.” Her gauntleted hand drifted from the stick shift and landed softly on Caret’s knee. “Just because some jackass made you here doesn’t mean you’re stuck here forever. You’re free now.” She turned her head towards the woman, her age unknowable and unimportant and looked into her eyes. “We’re finally free, and we’re gonna make a life of it.”
“Ok,” Caret responded, still unsure. “So where to, then?”
The woman shrugged. “Well, not Camelot. Not for a little bit at least. I dunno, what sounds good to you?”
“Hell if I know. I’ve never really thought about it.” She drummed her fingers on the sill of the window. “Where the hell did all that… stuff come from? Why are you carrying around a head, and what the hell happened to your arm?”
The bandit grinned broadly. “Souvenirs. I took a little something from everyone I beat in that tourney.”
The first smile since the nameless woman had returned appeared on Caret’s face. “I would have loved to see that. You smashing up on some smug little primes and ripping off their arms and stuff. Was it a robot?”
The bandit shook her head. “Nah, wizard. It was fuckin’ awesome.”
“A wizard?” Caret laughed, “Really? Why did a wizard have a metal arm?”
“Hell if I know! Dude was tough though. I’d love to catch up with that him some time.” She turned the truck in a wide, lazy, U and started back towards the gate.
Caret nodded. “Cool. It’s good to hear you’re still out there making friends.”
“You know me, a real socialite.” The truck jumped and lurched as she corrected their path, and she made minor turns to align herself with the compass.
Caret glanced at the dashboard. “We headed for the gate?” She fiddled with her fingers and found them back on her new leg.
The woman nodded. “Yup.”
“You have a place in mind?”
“Nope.”
---
The night sky was cool and dry, a waning moon dangling in the cloudless sky. The city was busy, as it always was, and a gentle din of voices and machinery drifted in from not too far away.
The M35 roared angrily as it mounted a practically verdant hill that lead into Carrefore. It coasted through the air for a short distance before slamming down and fishtailing in the dirt. The several armed stormtroopers glanced between each other and primed their weapons, their nightvision easily spotting it before it could get too close. It had been a while since any raiders had been stupid enough to attack their encampment, but they were more than happy to oblige anything that came knocking.
“Unidentified vehicle, decrease speed and proceed to the checkpoint,” a booming voice called from the watchtower. Amazingly, the truck followed the commands and slowly approached them, coming to a complete stop a few meters from the soldiers.
The troopers stared for a moment, expecting something less than nice to pop out at any moment. After a pregnant pause, one of them with a red shoulder plate tapped an inferior on the shoulder and pointed. “Go check it out,” his distorted voice ordered.
The soldier, in his dirty white armor, obeyed without a word. After a short jog, he stopped in front of the driver’s side door, blaster rifle still held firmly in front of him. “Open up.”
The driver’s side door swung open, and the woman looked down at him. “What up?” she said as pleasantly as she could muster.
“We need to inspect your vehicle before we can allow you into Carrefore,” the trooper’s voice was practically without emotion.
The bandit rolled her eyes. “Yo man, I just wanna get to the gate.”
Without moving, behind his unblinking helmet, the trooper responded, “We have to inspect your vehicle before we can let you into town, ma’am.”
The woman sighed heavily. “Fuck man, alright.” She looked over to her passenger. “Caret, are there still any guns or any other shit in here?”
The pink haired young woman shook her head. “No, I didn’t manage to keep anything when the warboy jacked everything.”
The woman was clearly some kind of wasteland warrior, covered in heavy armor and a huge hammer sat beside her. “I’m going to have to ask you to disarm and step out of the vehicle, ma’am.”
Again the titan of a driver rolled her eyes. “Dude, whatever, let’s just get this over with.” She swept up the hammer with a single hand and tossed it down into the sand besides him, sending a spray up when it landed. She snatched a laser rifle and he instinctively lifted his weapon, but she only sneered and dropped an energy magazine from the bottom. “Chill the fuck out. If I was here to fight, you’d better bet you and your squad would already be road kill.” The trooper ignored the comment and kept his blaster at the ready until she had dropped it from the door.
“Please disembark,” he commanded.
“Holy shit,” she said dryly, hopping from her seat, “’disembark.’ I am so glad I’ve never had to hold an actual conversation with a trooper before.” The pink-haired passenger cautiously clambered down from her seat as well, and the pair stood off to the side while the subordinate ushered his squad over.
The troopers began a systematic search of the truck, peeling back carpet and checking the undercarriage. Caret winced as they tugged at delicate wiring, but the bandit put her hand on her shoulder to quiet her. “You hungry, kid?” she asked, transparently attempting to distract her.
“I could eat I guess,” Caret responded.
The woman held her hands together and the familiar glow of omnilium flowed outward. The guard captain looked back to the pair and walked towards them. “You’re a prime?” he asked flatly.
“Yeah,” the bandit responded, “Have you ever seen a secondary with this much layering? Motherfuckers have no concept of character design when they making throwaway people. Why, you hungry too, dude? I’m trying to concentrate on some chips, here.”
The captain pressed down a button on his helmet and began walking away. “HQ this is Red 4, I have a prime at Checkpoint Bravo. We’re inspecting their vehicle now, please advise.”
He moved outside of the duo’s hearing, and the bandit shook her head. “I hate the Empire so much,” she grumbled. The bag finished materializing and she passively handed it to Caret. “Always so fuckin' uptight.”
“They’re screwing everything up,” Caret complained wistfully.
“Whatever, just- just let them do whatever. We’ll fix it once we’re out of here.” She stared out at the city, taking note of the lights and the distant, subdued crowds. “I heard there’s a nice bar here.”
Caret followed her friend’s gaze. “Yeah, like Mick’s or something, right? I’ve never been into a bar before.”
The woman laughed, “Oh shit, are you serious? Well I know where we’re going as soon as this is d-“
“What is this?” a trooper approached them and barked accusatorily, holding a metallic canister.
“That’s the nitro you idiot!” Caret shouted. “Did you really just take out the goddamn nitro? Really? You had to literally physically remove that from the engine!”
The heavily armored juggernaut strode forward and pulled it from the trooper’s hand, her shoulder slamming into his as she pushed past. “Alright fuckwads, get off my truck. You’re done here.”
The guard captain marched just inches in front of her, standing several inches shorter and far less broad. “We’ll let you know when we’re done inspecting the vehicle.”
“The hell you will,” she boomed, “I’m telling you you’re done now. Nobody else has to put up with this horse shit.”
The empire commander stood his ground. “I decide what’s necessary, and this vehicle seems suspicious to me. I can’t allow you to bring anything dangerous into the city.”
“I’m a prime, moron. The city is full of other primes. We’re not smuggling anything in, and even if we wanted to do something crazy in town, I wouldn’t bother making it ahead of time. I’d just use my magic goddamn powers to make whatever I needed while I was in there.” She leaned down, inspecting his battered head piece. “How long have you been in the Omniverse anyways? Did somebody make you yesterday or something?”
“Was that a threat?” he growled back.
“No,” the bandit snarled, “you’d fucking know if it was a threat. Now get your jackass troopers off of my truck so I can go and spend omni in your stupid town before we roll on through.”
For a moment, the captain said nothing. In that time, the woman’s patience fizzled out. She shoved her way past him, pulled a trooper from the driver’s seat and called after her companion. “We’re getting out of here Caret, come on.”
Several of the troopers pulled their blasters on her, but she ignored them, gathering up her things from the ground and putting them back inside. Caret sheepishly jogged back around while the bandit climbed back into her truck and sat down just as the engine started back up. The remaining guards stepped away from the wheels as they spun out and the truck sped into the town.
“HQ, watch out for two suspicious individuals, one prime and one unknown status. Descriptions incoming.”
“Yeah,” the driver responded, “we can get it soon.”
Caret looked at the bandit, who wore a look almost devoid of emotion. It was strange, seeing her like this, oddly serene. Seeing her at all, really, after all this time. “So where are we going?”
No response this time.
Caret sighed and looked out into the sands. Wreckages, which she would have begged to stop at only a few weeks ago, whizzed by. The badlands stretched in every direction, and there didn’t seem to be any sign of life in the immediate area. Still, long plumes of smoke streaked up into the sky, reminding her that she could never escape the truth of the marauders that were nestled into almost every nook and cranny of her accursed homeland.
“We’re gonna get the hell out of here for a little bit,” the woman said finally, her eyes still locked on the road. “I had never left the Dunes before I got brought back. I’m sure I never would have. I woulda lived and died in this fuckin’ place.” She let off the gas and shifted, the angry roar of the truck filling the cab for a moment. “You deserve to see what else is out there.”
“I mean, no, don’t worry about that,” Caret said softly. “Don’t make travel plans for me.”
The woman smiled softly. “Why the hell not? It’s not like I’ve got any plans.”
Caret stared at her lap. “I guess.”
“There are whole other verses out there. Whole new worlds.” Her gauntleted hand drifted from the stick shift and landed softly on Caret’s knee. “Just because some jackass made you here doesn’t mean you’re stuck here forever. You’re free now.” She turned her head towards the woman, her age unknowable and unimportant and looked into her eyes. “We’re finally free, and we’re gonna make a life of it.”
“Ok,” Caret responded, still unsure. “So where to, then?”
The woman shrugged. “Well, not Camelot. Not for a little bit at least. I dunno, what sounds good to you?”
“Hell if I know. I’ve never really thought about it.” She drummed her fingers on the sill of the window. “Where the hell did all that… stuff come from? Why are you carrying around a head, and what the hell happened to your arm?”
The bandit grinned broadly. “Souvenirs. I took a little something from everyone I beat in that tourney.”
The first smile since the nameless woman had returned appeared on Caret’s face. “I would have loved to see that. You smashing up on some smug little primes and ripping off their arms and stuff. Was it a robot?”
The bandit shook her head. “Nah, wizard. It was fuckin’ awesome.”
“A wizard?” Caret laughed, “Really? Why did a wizard have a metal arm?”
“Hell if I know! Dude was tough though. I’d love to catch up with that him some time.” She turned the truck in a wide, lazy, U and started back towards the gate.
Caret nodded. “Cool. It’s good to hear you’re still out there making friends.”
“You know me, a real socialite.” The truck jumped and lurched as she corrected their path, and she made minor turns to align herself with the compass.
Caret glanced at the dashboard. “We headed for the gate?” She fiddled with her fingers and found them back on her new leg.
The woman nodded. “Yup.”
“You have a place in mind?”
“Nope.”
---
The night sky was cool and dry, a waning moon dangling in the cloudless sky. The city was busy, as it always was, and a gentle din of voices and machinery drifted in from not too far away.
The M35 roared angrily as it mounted a practically verdant hill that lead into Carrefore. It coasted through the air for a short distance before slamming down and fishtailing in the dirt. The several armed stormtroopers glanced between each other and primed their weapons, their nightvision easily spotting it before it could get too close. It had been a while since any raiders had been stupid enough to attack their encampment, but they were more than happy to oblige anything that came knocking.
“Unidentified vehicle, decrease speed and proceed to the checkpoint,” a booming voice called from the watchtower. Amazingly, the truck followed the commands and slowly approached them, coming to a complete stop a few meters from the soldiers.
The troopers stared for a moment, expecting something less than nice to pop out at any moment. After a pregnant pause, one of them with a red shoulder plate tapped an inferior on the shoulder and pointed. “Go check it out,” his distorted voice ordered.
The soldier, in his dirty white armor, obeyed without a word. After a short jog, he stopped in front of the driver’s side door, blaster rifle still held firmly in front of him. “Open up.”
The driver’s side door swung open, and the woman looked down at him. “What up?” she said as pleasantly as she could muster.
“We need to inspect your vehicle before we can allow you into Carrefore,” the trooper’s voice was practically without emotion.
The bandit rolled her eyes. “Yo man, I just wanna get to the gate.”
Without moving, behind his unblinking helmet, the trooper responded, “We have to inspect your vehicle before we can let you into town, ma’am.”
The woman sighed heavily. “Fuck man, alright.” She looked over to her passenger. “Caret, are there still any guns or any other shit in here?”
The pink haired young woman shook her head. “No, I didn’t manage to keep anything when the warboy jacked everything.”
The woman was clearly some kind of wasteland warrior, covered in heavy armor and a huge hammer sat beside her. “I’m going to have to ask you to disarm and step out of the vehicle, ma’am.”
Again the titan of a driver rolled her eyes. “Dude, whatever, let’s just get this over with.” She swept up the hammer with a single hand and tossed it down into the sand besides him, sending a spray up when it landed. She snatched a laser rifle and he instinctively lifted his weapon, but she only sneered and dropped an energy magazine from the bottom. “Chill the fuck out. If I was here to fight, you’d better bet you and your squad would already be road kill.” The trooper ignored the comment and kept his blaster at the ready until she had dropped it from the door.
“Please disembark,” he commanded.
“Holy shit,” she said dryly, hopping from her seat, “’disembark.’ I am so glad I’ve never had to hold an actual conversation with a trooper before.” The pink-haired passenger cautiously clambered down from her seat as well, and the pair stood off to the side while the subordinate ushered his squad over.
The troopers began a systematic search of the truck, peeling back carpet and checking the undercarriage. Caret winced as they tugged at delicate wiring, but the bandit put her hand on her shoulder to quiet her. “You hungry, kid?” she asked, transparently attempting to distract her.
“I could eat I guess,” Caret responded.
The woman held her hands together and the familiar glow of omnilium flowed outward. The guard captain looked back to the pair and walked towards them. “You’re a prime?” he asked flatly.
“Yeah,” the bandit responded, “Have you ever seen a secondary with this much layering? Motherfuckers have no concept of character design when they making throwaway people. Why, you hungry too, dude? I’m trying to concentrate on some chips, here.”
The captain pressed down a button on his helmet and began walking away. “HQ this is Red 4, I have a prime at Checkpoint Bravo. We’re inspecting their vehicle now, please advise.”
He moved outside of the duo’s hearing, and the bandit shook her head. “I hate the Empire so much,” she grumbled. The bag finished materializing and she passively handed it to Caret. “Always so fuckin' uptight.”
“They’re screwing everything up,” Caret complained wistfully.
“Whatever, just- just let them do whatever. We’ll fix it once we’re out of here.” She stared out at the city, taking note of the lights and the distant, subdued crowds. “I heard there’s a nice bar here.”
Caret followed her friend’s gaze. “Yeah, like Mick’s or something, right? I’ve never been into a bar before.”
The woman laughed, “Oh shit, are you serious? Well I know where we’re going as soon as this is d-“
“What is this?” a trooper approached them and barked accusatorily, holding a metallic canister.
“That’s the nitro you idiot!” Caret shouted. “Did you really just take out the goddamn nitro? Really? You had to literally physically remove that from the engine!”
The heavily armored juggernaut strode forward and pulled it from the trooper’s hand, her shoulder slamming into his as she pushed past. “Alright fuckwads, get off my truck. You’re done here.”
The guard captain marched just inches in front of her, standing several inches shorter and far less broad. “We’ll let you know when we’re done inspecting the vehicle.”
“The hell you will,” she boomed, “I’m telling you you’re done now. Nobody else has to put up with this horse shit.”
The empire commander stood his ground. “I decide what’s necessary, and this vehicle seems suspicious to me. I can’t allow you to bring anything dangerous into the city.”
“I’m a prime, moron. The city is full of other primes. We’re not smuggling anything in, and even if we wanted to do something crazy in town, I wouldn’t bother making it ahead of time. I’d just use my magic goddamn powers to make whatever I needed while I was in there.” She leaned down, inspecting his battered head piece. “How long have you been in the Omniverse anyways? Did somebody make you yesterday or something?”
“Was that a threat?” he growled back.
“No,” the bandit snarled, “you’d fucking know if it was a threat. Now get your jackass troopers off of my truck so I can go and spend omni in your stupid town before we roll on through.”
For a moment, the captain said nothing. In that time, the woman’s patience fizzled out. She shoved her way past him, pulled a trooper from the driver’s seat and called after her companion. “We’re getting out of here Caret, come on.”
Several of the troopers pulled their blasters on her, but she ignored them, gathering up her things from the ground and putting them back inside. Caret sheepishly jogged back around while the bandit climbed back into her truck and sat down just as the engine started back up. The remaining guards stepped away from the wheels as they spun out and the truck sped into the town.
“HQ, watch out for two suspicious individuals, one prime and one unknown status. Descriptions incoming.”