Bonus Request Topic/Quest Turn-in Topic

[Luci]

Herbal Medicine
Quest or Personal Storyline?: Personal Storyline
Participating characters: Ricter Casenger
Total Character Count: 101,196 characters.
Total word count: 19,416 words.

Viewer desertion is advised: Violence, innuendo's

There is so much to love about your thread.

Your descriptions of the Tangled Green are amazing, from the first time you lovingly go over the fauna and the rich air, to the quick but interesting descriptions of the townsfolk. Your description of the market likewise held an air of approachable mystery, of adventure for the taking.

The character's were engaging, the goblins in particular. The goblins really stole the show, as you turn a low-level DnD encounter into something exotic, vibrant, with real danger for the protagonist and a real sense of loathing the reader feels towards the foul little goblins. Similarly, Vee (and to a lesser extent Vel) was very well-thought-out, with very real motivations and reactions and a well defined character. Even the merchants and Dr Dovan and the other minor characters are fun to read.

Unfortunately, I cannot award a bonus to this thread

Like I said, there is a lot to like about the thread. The parts that are good are DARN good. It is clear that you spent time and effort lovingly crafting SOME of the thread.

Unfortunately, it casts a light on the parts of the thread that are not as well-tended.

Spelling mistakes, missing or wrong words, sloppy scene changes, even the minor issue of colored text, these things compound to make a potentially great thread very hard to read and enjoy.

Editing is not as fun as writing, especially editing the parts of your story that are not as interesting to write. However editing heavily benefits the reader, and we like to encourage you to spend a little extra time and energy to make the experience more enjoyable for the reader. Comparing this thread to Ricter's entrance, I feel that this thread does not hold up to your own standard of writing.

While I can not award a bonus for this thread in it's current form, I offer you a solution. Go back and edit your posts. Edit the color of the dialogue to be black (but find another way to distinguish who is speaking if possible). Clean up whatever spelling mistakes, missing or wrong words, and things of that nature that you can. I will personally monitor the edit queue for you. When you are done, resubmit the thread, and you will have earned your bonus.

P.S. if you edit your first post, the thread dissapears, do not be concerned.