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Move Approval V
(03-08-2018, 05:56 AM)Summer Wrote: In light of the new rules, time to edit a move.

Old:
T1 Super Attack: Microburst (Area Attack, Ranged, Ranged Materialize) (600): 
[spoiler]The weather itself begins to bend to the will of Summer, as he calls upon his power as the spirit of storms. He passively charges over the course of thirty seconds, able to move freely during this time but unable to attack, all the while dark clouds swiftly gather overhead, pushing out whatever weather had been there previously. Wind blasts down from the heavens, in a column roughly 15 meters in diameter centered on Summer, pulling the clouds and rain themselves down with it, and tearing those who are flying out of the sky. Upon contact with the ground, this downburst becomes an outburst, the wind rushing outwards 25 meters, covering an area of up to 40 meters from Summer in all directions. Raging out at 80 m/s, these gusts easily throw aside anyone caught within them, along with just about anything not nailed down. The wind itself doesn’t do any damage outright, rather, it’s everything the wind tosses about that does the bulk of the harm. A weak rainstorm is left in the wake of this attack, which passes naturally after it runs its course, however many hours that may take. Can not be used in places where the skies are blocked, such as buildings or caves.[/spoiler]

New:
T1 Super Attack: Microburst (Area Attack, Ranged, Ranged Materialize) (600): 
[spoiler]Over the course of 10 seconds, Summer bends the weather itself to his will, conjuring up a rainstorm to devastate his foes. Black clouds swiftly gather overhead, blotting out the sky and pushing out whatever weather had been there previously. Aside from the ominous clouds, those particularly attuned to the weather can feel all the tiny atmospheric changes that come with an approaching storm. The very sky itself seems to tear down from the heavens with wind, clouds, and rain blasting to the ground in a massive downburst, though the actual effects are limited to a roughly 15-meter diameter column centered on Summer. This devastating onslaught of wind tears all who are flying directly above him out of the sky. 
Upon hitting the ground, this downburst becomes an outburst, with powerful winds rushing out and throwing aside everyone and everything within an area up to 15 meters from Summer in all directions. These winds can be felt out much, much further than that, but past that distance, they have no effect and don't carry debris fast enough to harm. After a few seconds of raging, the winds subside, leaving naught but a weak rainstorm in their wake. As with most wind-based attacks, it's not the air itself that does the damage, but rather all the people and debris being turned into deadly projectiles. As a weather-changing move, it cannot be used in places where the skies are blocked, such as buildings or caves.[/spoiler]

I'm pretty sure I looked over this one already. You're not using the entire 30 metre diameter limit on the damaging effect, and the wind effect is a non-damaging utility (see the full description for the rules addendum I posted), so the existing version is fine.
Curious about me and the characters I play? See the 'Staff' page! See also the rosters for my characters Samus Aran or Enel if you'd like to see examples of well-formatted rosters. Hope you enjoy the Omniverse!


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Move Approval V - by Jade Harley - 09-08-2017, 08:03 PM

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