The Ashen Fortress III

[Claptrap]

Claptrap dejectedly watched as Miranda walked away. The others that helped them to defeat the darkloid could never replace her. They were too flashy, they'd draw the spotlight off of him. With a dramatic sigh, Claptrap turned and walked inside, before flopping on the couch in the common room. While did his best to sit down, Claptrap’s thoughts wandered to how great it would be to go wherever he wanted in the Omniverse. “Oh, wait.” He said to himself. “I can just summon a fast travel station!” The robot lifted himself off the couch and trundled over to an empty corner of the room. He summoned his orb of omnillium and got to work creating the fast travel station. The rainbow substance stretched to the rough size and shape of the machine, and Claptrap wondered how much of the stuff this would take out of him. “If I don't have any of the OM left over, then how will I buy our twelve foot tall victory statue after we defeat Nebula?” He muttered to himself.

When the summoning was complete, Claptrap high fived himself. A brand new Hyperion fast travel station, that didn't require other stations to function, was sitting before him, almost ready to be used. “Now… How do I turn it on?” Claptrap poked and prodded all over the machine, before opening up its side panel and doing the same. Finally, he found the on button, narrowly before accidentally discovering the self destruct button, and the machine whirred to life. The ‘eye’ on the machine lit up, and turned to Claptrap. “Oh god, am I in hell?” It asked in the same female voice that yelled at Claptrap whenever he was about to do something dangerous and/or awesome. Claptrap didn't bother replying, fast travel stations never had anything positive to say anyways. “I'd better test it, just to make sure.” Claptrap ‘whispered’ to himself. “Ok, fast travel station, teleport me somewhere else in this ‘verse.” The machine processed the request for a moment. “Is that your designated teleportation region?” It asked. Claptrap scratched his head. “What do you mean?”

The robot could have sworn he saw the fast travel station roll it's eye. “You can choose a single verse for this fast travel station to transport you to. Additional teleportation locations can be purchased for a low, low price of 499.99 OM.”
Claptrap stared, dumbfounded, at the fast travel station for a moment. “But… But I MADE you… Surely I can get more locations for free?” The fast travel machine laughed heartily at his pleas. “Of course not, you cheap bastard.” With a grumble, Claptrap considered his options. Shadow had been hunting a lot of bounties in Coruscant, according to the board on the other side of the room which was displaying some pretty gruesome pictures of her victims, and she’d love a surprise visit from Ol’ Clappy every now and then. “Alright, my selected verse is Coruscant.” Claptrap said to the fast travel station. “Of course. Processing purchase… Do you mind if we give your personal information out to whoever asks?” Claptrap waved his arms wildly, panic setting in. “No no no no no, do NOT give out my personal information!” The fast travel station laughed again. “As if you have a choice, dumbass.”

Claptrap turned to the nearest wall and banged his head against it. He could almost feel the spam emails. “Processing complete,” the fast travel station chimed, “you may now teleport to Coruscant. Please set up teleporter permissions.” Claptrap wheeled over to the fast travel station and mentally went over anyone who he should give permission to. “The bo- I mean, Kuzuru, Shadow and, uh…” Claptrap’s thoughts went to Miranda. “Yeah, throw Miranda in there too. I'm sure she'll be back… I hope.” The fast travel station whirred before dinging. “Permissions set. Have a Hyperion day!” Claptrap would have smiled if he had a mouth. It was about time the fast travel station said something nice.