12-24-2017, 08:43 AM
(This post was last modified: 12-24-2017, 08:44 AM by Dane Regan.)
@Jams:
T1 super attacks do 1-3 damage (depends on the foes DEF and your ATK), so those numbers are unreasonable. I'd expect you could easily use this move more than seven times in a fight . Also, we don't write how much damage something does in the move. You can describe it as weak, or powerful if you want, but not "it does X damage". The exception to this is when you want a move to have a definite recoil. Like "1 hp to use" or something - but even those moves don't say how much damage they do to opponents. Although that's not required for such moves. (See Dane's "Break a Leg", that's a strong move - similar to yours - with recoil).
Essentially, go through the move and remove the damage numbers.
Also, this move has multiple variants. Moves cost 300 OM per variability - since otherwise you'd effectively be getting an additional move for free. This move should cost 600 OM.
I'd further suggest that you base your descriptions of foes with a DEF equal to your ATK (which may happen to be 2, but I'd write this instead - that way the description will be more useful for if your stats change). For a pure damage move, this isn't required though. You're overcomplicating this a bit. Try going through the moves page of the rules again. There's also a checklist there for everything you need to include that might help.
Lastly, I don't see why this needs telekinesis. Maybe as flavour (like using telekinesis on his own arm), but since you're not manipulating anything at range it's not required. If the punches had a strong knockback, I could understand the need for it. But, as it stands, this currently only needs physical proficiency.
Quote:A safe, strong punch of about 3-4 damage would probably take 3 seconds.No.
T1 super attacks do 1-3 damage (depends on the foes DEF and your ATK), so those numbers are unreasonable. I'd expect you could easily use this move more than seven times in a fight . Also, we don't write how much damage something does in the move. You can describe it as weak, or powerful if you want, but not "it does X damage". The exception to this is when you want a move to have a definite recoil. Like "1 hp to use" or something - but even those moves don't say how much damage they do to opponents. Although that's not required for such moves. (See Dane's "Break a Leg", that's a strong move - similar to yours - with recoil).
Essentially, go through the move and remove the damage numbers.
Also, this move has multiple variants. Moves cost 300 OM per variability - since otherwise you'd effectively be getting an additional move for free. This move should cost 600 OM.
I'd further suggest that you base your descriptions of foes with a DEF equal to your ATK (which may happen to be 2, but I'd write this instead - that way the description will be more useful for if your stats change). For a pure damage move, this isn't required though. You're overcomplicating this a bit. Try going through the moves page of the rules again. There's also a checklist there for everything you need to include that might help.
Lastly, I don't see why this needs telekinesis. Maybe as flavour (like using telekinesis on his own arm), but since you're not manipulating anything at range it's not required. If the punches had a strong knockback, I could understand the need for it. But, as it stands, this currently only needs physical proficiency.