(11-01-2017, 02:34 PM)Omni Wrote:(11-01-2017, 01:28 PM)Gunther Stein Wrote: Bolded a new addition on another end clause, underlined the bit already present about manual ending.
About the shortened duration, I can agree to shave off a bit, but reducing it so much would make the move pretty much worthless. I believe some of the downsides have been overlooked, so I'll sum up what I'm counting.
Charge up time of 5 seconds, during which Stein is completely vulnerable and focused. The receiving party, by extension, must also remain stationary, as this is a touch-based spell. Two characters so close and unable to move means in battle this is a liability to initiate.
Damage dealt to Stein is unavoidable and willingly taken. This is both part of the boon and part of the bane. The Boon is that the target's damage is reduced by half, which would be OP if all incoming damage was halved for five minutes. This is not the case, total damage is still inflicted. The other half is received by Stein, and is unavoidable.
I'm counting this damage as part of the "maintenance cost." Willingly taking damage is a plausible downside to increase a Move's potency. In this case, no damage is actually lost (only redistributed) so instead of potency, its the duration that is longer because Stein is constantly accepting damage during the duration of the spell.
To sum up, the biggest cost is that Stein becomes very vulnerable, knows this, and still chooses to use what is effectively (and by lore) a move that can turn him into a martyr. I'd argue that the duration could be longer due to the entire move being merely transferring damage to himself (not even to an enemy.)
Edit; Wanted to add a bit about maintenance at the lower duration would make it pretty undesirable for others to actually want to make themselves vulnerable. Deminishing returns, since they'd be taking more damage trying to reduce their damage than actually reducing damage.
Bond of the Guardian 300
Area Defense, Ranged, Physical, Buff
To cast this spell, Stein must be in physical contact with a willing target for five seconds and maintain heavy concentration. This means he must be stationary and have at least one hand touching the target. Even minor damage can break the focus. Once cast, the target's future damage from any and all sources is halved, so long as they remain within thirty meters. The duration of the spell lasts for five minutes, until Stein ends the connection, if Stein is rendered unconscious, or if the target moves out of range. Stein can have up to five Bonded allies - however, he takes damage from EACH Bonded ally, making more allies exponentially more dangerous to himself.
When the Bond is complete, the any and all future damage the target takes is reduced by half. The remaining half damage is instead afflicted upon Stein, as if the attack had been directed at him instead (which allows him to apply his high defense.) This damage is a direct effect, meaning he cannot block or dodge it. If both he and the bonded target are hit by an AoE, Stein takes his own damage, along with the half damage from his ally.
The Bonded Ally gains a visual effect that seems to be a suit of glass armor. This does not disrupt their movement, as it is weightless and ethereal. If the spell ends, this suit of armor shatters like glass, though it deals no damage and the shrapnel vanishes like ghostly entities.
I get what the move does, but five minutes is an extremely long duration, and the move has no notable fatigue cost and only a five-second chargeup. Damage redirection is pretty powerful if you're casting it on a high-attack individual and you yourself have very high defense. You're basically sending attacks which would kill/heavily injure a 0-DEF individual onto yourself. That's very useful.
So ... yeah, it's extremely powerful and unless you're adding more downsides, I can't approve a five minute duration.
Moved to Workshop