Move Approval V

[The Vision]

@McGinnis, after these you can't get any more Moves approved until you buy some.
[spoiler]
I rewrote confusing wording for you and put it in bold.

Bo-Staff/Fighting Sticks Hybrid (600 OM, Physical Strength):

1.4 m (4 ft 7 in) tall and 15 cm (5.9 in) circumference. When in staff mode, it is 1.8 m (6 ft) tall and 25 mm (1 in) in diameter. This staff is made out of a dark gray metal. When the staff is split apart into Escrima Stick mode it is 26" to 28" long. The staff is good for melee, as are the Eschrima Sticks. They're made for non-lethal, and have no hidden blades, or anything. This is moderately draining on his stamina to use, and takes him eight seconds to materialize, initially. Afterward, he can summon it whenever he wants without any effort whatsoever.

First of all, I don't know what the first dimensions refer to, but if it's a pole like I suspect, that means it has a radius of almost 2 inches. That's a pretty thick staff, and also contradictory to what you say later. Secondly, can't tell what the difference is mechanically between the two modes (besides length). How much damage does each mode do? Do they have different ranges? Also, I'd say that you can't ever summon weapons whenever you want. If you find an example otherwise, maybe, but I'm gonna say tone down the effort and time, but make it so every time he has to summon a new set it takes the same amount of effort and time.

Feint Punch: (300 OM, Physical Strength)

Feint Punch is an attack that is moderately draining on Matthew's stamina. This move involves a punch aimed at the head, but that is a feint. The real blow is aimed at the stomach of his opponent, and hits at speeds of 25 MPH. This does moderate damage, and takes him 8 seconds in order to perform this move successfully.

This doesn't seem like it needs a Move. But, if you want, let me take a crack at it. As it stands, it sounds like you can just do this over and over. I'm gonna show you a similar move by Humble Sage: http://omniverse-rpg.com/showthread.php?...#pid109418. I don't know if it needs to be that complicated but do you see how he mentions how the target could sorta beat the feint? But like I said, this doesn't necessarily need to be a Move in the first place.

Head Drum Solo (300 OM, Physical Strength):

Head Drum Solo is a technique that he can only do when he gets close to his opponents. Taking out his Escrima sticks, he'll get close to his opponents, and use their heads as a drum. Each strike will do low damage, and it has 14 strikes on their head. 45 Second Cool down when it has been used, takes him ten seconds to do. It is moderately draining on his stamina.

Can he use other Moves? I assume he can't move too much, but you should say that too. Can this be interrupted? Also, since cooldowns are generally considered not good enough drawbacks, you should put in a different drawback. Although, creds for the funniest concept I've had this month.

Head Scissor Smash Down (300 OM, Physical Strength):

First, Matthew will attempt to get his opponent into a set of head scissors. Should this succeed, he will smash their skull into the ground. The head scissors doesn't do any damage, but the smash does medium damage. Takes him about 20 seconds to use, 45 second cool down. The Head Scissor Smash Down is one of the CQC techniques that Matthew learned from his time in Cadmus. It's moderately draining on his stamina.

Again, cooldowns not that drawback-y. In other news, I'd say the attempt to get into head scissors should take some effort/time by itself, since it can fail. Furthermore, 20 seconds is a LONG time. By the way, how long can he stay in that head-scissors thing? And can it be interrupted once he's up there?

Energy Blast Attachment (300 OM, Ranged Proficiency):

A modification that can be installed on the Wrist Guns, so as to change them from bullets to energy beams. While this may reduce the ammunition to seven shots, before the power pack must be changed out, it ups the damage to moderate with each shot. This takes him about 5 seconds to swap between energy and regular. Should he run out of shots, it takes him about 7 seconds to recharge. This is moderately draining on his stamina, and has a range of 45 feet, compared to the others.

Approve-aroni.[/spoiler]

@Dane Regan:
[spoiler]

Break a Leg (300): Requires: Physical Proficiency

By channelling his mana through one of his limbs, Dane can unleash an incredibly powerful strike. Charging this takes around three seconds, which he can do while moving, but attacking or getting hit breaks his concentration, and must be used the moment it’s ready. Once charged, Dane can execute a punch, kick, or any melee weapon attack. If the attack connects, the stored mana hits with enough force to send opponents flying back a few meters. The extreme strength comes at a cost, however. A successful punch fractures the bones in Dane's hand, and possibly his arm as well if he’s unlucky, while a successful kick fractures or possibly even outright breaks his leg. When using a weapon, while it typically won't get damaged by doing this (unless it's more fragile, like an incidental one), the limb(s) Dane used to hold it will suffer. In essence: same effect, just a different execution. Though he can continue to strike even after he’s broken many bones, overdoing it with the same limb causes larger breaks, and eventually an unplanned amputation. This doesn't use much mana, so Dane is simply left wounded and winded after use.

Approve-aroni.[/spoiler]

@Hijiri, I or another mod will get to you in a bit.

@Dawn:
[spoiler]

Alt Form (2) - Alexus Krine [2000OM]
1/5/2/3

The aspect of emotion is a prominent feature of Dawn’s. It seems the demon form inside her continues to manifest and create odd types of personas of people. Dawn resembles her inner Despair and Sorrow; Erika has manifested Dawn’s Anger and Rage into a horrible blonde entity; and now, Alexus has softened and sewn out the repressed Happiness and Joy her life has brought her. Albeit a horribly small amount of happiness. The speed it take Dawn or Erika to change to Alexus depends on the body who is currently in control. Dawn will be faster, while Erika will be much slower.



Warding Shield - 300
-Physical Strength

Alexus manifests a magical field in her hand in the shape of a shield. It glows faintly of red and light blue coalescence. This is a simple move used to block attacks. It’s basically a shield.

Flare - 600
-Ranged Proficiency

Flare is the simple use of fire. Alexus prefers the use of magic, but all forms can use this magical power. It can come out in two different forms: Through a bolt, or as a flamethrower spray.

The first use of flare comes out as a bolt. This is a flaming ball of fire that can reach up to 750F(~400C). It can fly for about 15 seconds before it dissolves into the air up to 50m. The fire is launched from the user's hand after charging it for up to 5 seconds, but it is ready after 2 seconds.

The flamethrower has a much shorter range. It shoots a straight line of fire forward from the user's palm up to 2m. It is charged for two seconds before it can be ignited. Once ignited, it can be blown for about for 10 seconds straight until the user stops. If stopped prematurely, it must be recharged to use again. The user can move at half speed while casting both versions of the spell.

Searing Aura - 300
-Ranged Proficiency, Area Attack

Fire is a girl's best friend...right? An aura of fire surrounds Alexus(the only form capable of using this magic) that harms anyone who gets too close to her. After charging for 5 seconds, Alexus releases a cloak of searing flames around her body that gradually burns anything around her for up to 60 seconds. After performing the cast of the spell, Alexus can move freely, but she must hold completely still and focus entirely on her spell without interruption or else it will fail. The range on this attack is a five foot radius centered on Alexus for the duration.

Alexus Krine: Alright.

Warding Shield: How much effort does it take? How long can she hold the shield? How big? How much damage can it absorb?

Flare: I'll need effort for both versions. How much damage does each version do? Also, for the fireball, if it does more damage the more you charge it, you should know that's another use, bringing the price up to 900. I'm gonna assume that's just a "I can hold onto this for this long".

Searing Aura: Doesn't need Ranged. How much damage? Can she use other Moves? If so, then I think you should lower the amount of time you can maintain it, down to even 30 seconds.[/spoiler]