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The Chosen Undead
#1
Character name: The Chosen Undead (Does not remember actual name)

Character source: Dark Souls

Character history: Right as the Chosen Undead had completed his goals, enemies and friends slain, the four Lord Souls of Seath, Nito, the Kings, and the Bed of Chaos given to the Lord Vessel, Solaire...mad and dead. Right as the Chosen Undead traversed the Kiln of the First Flame, and slew the mad hollow that was once Gwyn, he stood before the final bonfire, the first fire. Then, he lit the flame, he kindled that last fire, that first fire. Yet, as the flames consumed him, as they ran over his body to use his very essence as fuel...he was yanked from his universe...and there he met Omni.

Physical Description:
[Image: Chosen_undead.png]

Stats:
ATK: 2
DEF: 3
SPD: 2
TEC: 3

Starting Proficiencies:
Physical Strength – 1000 OM
A unique proficiency, this allows characters to become proficient hand-to-hand combatants without purchasing any additional moves. It also allows for picking up heavy objects with your bare hands, strength dependent (as with your hand-to-hand strength) on your ATK stat. Once purchased, you may also purchase melee weapons as moves, or other advanced melee moves such as charged strikes.

Starting Powers:
Survival – 2000 OM
Often the trademark of zombies and other gruesome creatures, Survival allows the user to take grievous wounds which would otherwise kill or inhibit the user – such as being stabbed through the chest – and be completely unaffected. Unless body parts are actually disabled, such as when limbs or tendons are severed, injuries up til death will not inhibit your ability to fight in any way. You can still be killed, of course. With Hive Mind, even detached limbs will still be usable. You can also survive in zero-oxygen and high-pressure areas such as space, though this will not protect you from, for example, poison clouds from other players, or ultimately dying from the adverse effects of those spaces on your body.

Starting Moves:
Sunlight Straight Sword (Requires Physical Strength Proficiency)- Simple (300 OM)
The weapon of Solaire of Astora, a close friend of the Chosen Undead, sadly slain. This weapon is well forged, stolid and dependable. It has excellent balance, and is easy to use in battle. However, it is just a simple straight sword. It has no special qualities, though a dependable weapon nonetheless.

Silver Knight Shield (Requires Physical Strength Proficiency)- Variable (600 OM)
A weapon of great emotional attachment for the undead. This shield was a defensive item of choice for the Silver Knights, a legend he grew up revering, when he then had to slay what was left of them on his quest. This silver shield with its deep groove is highly stable, allowing it to stand up to rather punishing barrages of attacks without being brushed aside, and has an above average resistance to flame based attacks, and a moderate defense against lightning. Please note that it does not block such attacks completely, heat, electricity and even physical impacts will still be translated through to the user, just not as greatly as if he didn't have the shield. However, attacks of other kinds, be they spirit, ki, wind or based in some other method, have an easier time dealing damage through the shield, which cannot block them near as effectively, translating most of the damage through to the shield user. While sturdy it isn't impregnable, and enough attacks or a powerful enough attack can force the shield aside, and thus if the Chosen Undead tries to block an attack stronger than what the shield can take or defends for too long, his shield can be forced wide open, leaving him wide open to a devastating punishment for his turtling ways.

However, in addition to being used defensively, the Chosen Undead can also parry with it. This is an ability that requires phenomenal timing, involving sweeping the shield to the side to deflect a physical attack. More often than not it’s safer to wait until the opponent tries a slow or heavy attack, such as a leaping strike or a running thrust. If this is done successfully, which is easier said than done given the narrow timing, it can leave the opponent wide open for a counter attack! However, if a parry misses, it will generally mean he's about to take whatever attack he was trying to parry straight up. His shield will be completely off to his left side, he'd be completely exposed after a miss.

Riposte (Requires Physical STrength Proficiency, and a successfully landed Parry)- Simple (300 OM)
A technique that can only be used if the Chosen Undead manages to land a successful parry. During the few small moments in which the opponent’s guard is opened from the parry, the Chosen Undead can take their weapon, or even their bare fist, and slam it forward into the opponent’s open body. This technique though must be done quickly, and some opponents might recover quickly enough to move away from it or defend in some way. Yet, when a parry is done, and the Chosen Undead actually manages to land the Riposte, it is among the most damaging things he can do. This technique though, is best saved for a one on one duel. In a one on one duel, as long as the parry is landed, the Chosen just has to move quickly...although again landing the parry is a difficult feat in and of itself. However, in group fights or situations where he'll have more than just the one target on him, a Riposte attempt will leave him incredibly vulnerable to attack from enemy allies. He has to focus on the enemy, thrust his blade into them, and then rip it out, several long seconds during which anyone could easily barrel in from behind or the sides and throw him off their ally. Using it in a group battle requires a lot of confidence or surety.

Backstab (Requires Physical Strength Proficiency)- Simple (300 OM)
A simple attack that got the Chosen Undead around numerous difficult and dangerous foes. The Backstab, as one might have guessed, can only be performed from behind the opponent. This can be through sneaking up on them, or even circling around them after they perform a slow or heavy attack, such as a leaping strike or hard overhead slam. Essentially it’s using one’s weapon or fists to stab or strike the opponent’s back in a particularly critical location for a significant amount of damage to the enemy!

I confirm that I have read and agreed to the Rules of Conduct.
#2
Just a few things:

Crest Shield: What counts as magic or ki? It may be more clear if you just limit its strength to 'elemental' based attacks. Since magic doesn't work the same here in the Omniverse as in your character's source material. Magic is just too broad of a term with characters from so many different canons. Additionally, a simple shield move will never be able to entirely negate damage in battle - unless it is a Defensive Super Move. Lastly, will you be more open if a parry misses?

Riposte: If your Riposte misses, is your character left vulnerable? Something that you claim is your most damaging Move, should have a pretty steep downside if it fails, or just in general.

Everything else looks good~
[Image: SarahKerrigan_sig199_zpswcfeq7fe.png]
#3
Alright, I couldn't think of a way to represent the Crest Shield's high magic resistance in a way I'd be happy with. So I switched it with a shield that does have some good elemental resistances. In addition I made it more clear that the shield does not fully block damage, which is not hard to chew on, no shields blocked all damage except for pure physical, and that's easy to ignore. In addition, you're quite right, a parry does leave me wide open, and in fact will generally involve the Chosen eating whatever attack he was trying to parry in the first place.

As for the riposte, it doesn't really leave him open while attempting in a solo duel, considering that he already has to land a Parry, which means risking every single downside the parry has on top of that, in addition to the Chosen needing to go for the Riposte immediately lest the opponent recover and manage to defend or get out of the way. However, I DID add that attempting it in say a group fight would leave him massively vulnerable both while attempting, and actually performing.
#4
Sunlight Blade sounds like a powerup and needs to be purchased as such.
Curious about me and the characters I play? See the 'Staff' page! See also the rosters for my characters Samus Aran or Enel if you'd like to see examples of well-formatted rosters. Hope you enjoy the Omniverse!
#5
Alright, I've removed Sunlight Blade then, since I both can't yet get, and wouldn't use it, as a power up.
#6
With those edits, I see nothing else that is wrong; you're approved post this in a new topic in the roster section with an additional reply that at least describes your moves, but preferably becomes an entire character profile. For an example of one check any of the active members' rosters:

Name: Chosen Undead
Level: 1
Spent OM: 4,500
Proficiencies: (1000); Physical Strength (1000)
Powers: (2000); Survival (2000)
Moves: (1500); Sunlight Straight Sword (300), Silver Knight Shield (600), Riposte (300), Backstab (300)
Super Moves:
Transformations:
Summons:
Items:
Bases:
Unlocks:
Base stats:
ATK: 2
DEF: 3
SPD: 2
TEC: 3

I'll post up your log page which you may utilize to make purchases at a later time.

Remember your first IC post should be in the Nexus. Please see the introduction page in the Rules for further details. Afterwards, your free to head to any of the other verses that can be reached from the Nexus.

Edit; Oh yes, ask Omni to change your name as I can't do that.
[Image: SarahKerrigan_sig199_zpswcfeq7fe.png]


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