My writing ability

[Amber Veritz]

As some of you may have already noticed about me, I am not a very...avid writer. I started roleplaying because of my dyslexia and Attention Deficit hyperactivity disorder, and I wish to get better. Everyone here that I have met is a good writer, and some amazing. I wanna know: How do I include more detail into my writing? I need something like keypoints to remember that will spark in my mind every time I write(Just like a weight lifter who's squating should remember ATG...).

[Sasuke Uchiha]

This is just a quick response for now, maybe I'll add to it later, but I wanted to pop in and give you some of the basic things I do to ensure my writing has good detail in it.

Touch on your ALL of you character's senses. This is key. A lot of people just write and describe what their character sees, but, you need to go beyond that. What would they smell? What would they hear? How would these smells or sounds effect your character? What would it make them feel?

Another great way to add detail to your writing is to start using metaphors and analogies. Basically, find examples to help you describe your story by relating to the message you are trying to convey.

An example from my own work:

“What is the meaning of this? Are you just now realizing you don’t have a chance?” questioned a curious ninja, his movements like a spider stalking its latest catch.

By using this 'example', I was able to further depict the power position between the two characters in this particular story.

Another tip, albeit not about detail or description, this tip is more about story writing as a whole, but try to make sure your story has enough conflict. Conflict moves the story along and keeps it exciting, without conflict opposing your characters, the story will become flat; ie: boring.

Edit: They need problems and obstacles to overcome!!!!!!!!!

I'll add more, but this is a great start to help improve your game if you are not already doing these things.

[Thaal Sinestro]

For me, there are two things I would live to tell you right off the bat:
Show, Don't Tell. Basically, this means SHOW the reader what's happening, like a movie, don't TELL the reader what's happening through exposition.

Like, for example, don't outright say, "He was angry." Instead, SHOW us that he's angry. "He clenched his fists, and his entire body went tight. His jaw worked as he cast a furious glare."

See the difference? One supplies details that IMPLY his emotion, and the other is flat and bland by just telling us what is happening. There's an awesome writing outline written by a dude named Ander (from another site) that has another great example. I'll link it when I can.

Use Their Senses. When you are showing us what's happening, use a broad range of our senses. Speak to sight, sound, smell, hot, cold, sharp, dull. Try to be specific with the sensation. What STANDS OUT or is strange about it? What kind of details does the character notice? What kind of details are important to your character? What about their life makes their attention draw to certain aspects of sensation?

And with all of those details, you don't have to tell us WHY they notice them, only that they do. It add flavor and the elusive Voice to point out those details without explaining exactly why they are there.

That's not to say NEVER use exposition, but choose your moments. When will your exposition support your description as opposed to overshadow it? Give us tastes of their inner thoughts, don't down us with them. Instead, SHOW us how they feel through the use of sensation for the majority of the time.

[Strazio Rockwell]

I would recommend looking online for craft essays, especially those by Chuck Palahniuk and Stephen King, they both have some amazing essays on writing. If you want you can PM me and I can share some of the ones I have saved and direct you to some fantastic resources for improving writing.

Here is an excerpt from one of Chuck Palahniuk's essays that really helped me improve.

In six seconds, you’ll hate me.

But in six months, you’ll be a better writer.

From this point forward – at least for the next half year – you may not use “thought” verbs. These include: Thinks, Knows, Understands, Realizes, Believes, Wants, Remembers, Imagines, Desires, and a hundred others you love to use.

The list should also include: Loves and Hates.

And it should include: Is and Has, but we’ll get to those, later.

Until some time around Christmas, you can’t write: Kenny wondered if Monica didn’t like him going out at night…”

Instead, you’ll have to Un-pack that to something like: “The mornings after Kenny had stayed out, beyond the last bus, until he’d had to bum a ride or pay for a cab and got home to find Monica faking sleep, faking because she never slept that quiet, those mornings, she’d only put her own cup of coffee in the microwave. Never his.”

Instead of characters knowing anything, you must now present the details that allow the reader to know them. Instead of a character wanting something, you must now describe the thing so that the reader wants it.

Thinking is abstract. Knowing and believing are intangible. Your story will always be stronger if you just show the physical actions and details of your characters and allow your reader to do the thinking and knowing. And loving and hating.

Another tip I can offer when it comes to description and filling a page. If you don't know what to write, describe the inside of your characters mouth or their feet. Are they biting the inside of their cheeks in anticipation? Are the soles of their feet sore and pained after hiking 10 miles? Are they nervous and their mouth is dry because of it? There is a gold mine of sensory descriptions with the feet and mouth that mingle fantastically with show don't tell. Starting from within the character and then expanding to their surroundings gives you a really good base for setting the scene and their interpretation of said scene.

[Thaal Sinestro]

I always like to talk about a characters hands and eyes. We always express so much with our hands and eyes, they tell us so much about their attention and their state of mind.

However, it's really really easy to over use those two. Mouth and feet are a ready good suggestion that I myself will be taking.

[Thaal Sinestro]

This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety.

Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.

-Gary Provost

[Amber Veritz]

This is all extremely helpful guys. Thank you for taking time to help a rookie. If I'm gonna be a bounty hunter prime, my character is good and all but I need to be able to write as well as my opposer too.