Panty Writing Practice [M]

[Guu]

Practicing writing as my third character, Panty. I’m really close to unlocking her but I just had to get this out of my system.

Okay, I want to make this clear from the beginning. I’ve seen what other writers do, and I’m just going to say, I am NOT like them at all! I am not here to entertain you with the same shit they do. You won’t see words like “prologay” or “epiloog” or however those words are spelt. I just want to let you pissants know one thing:

I AM NOT HERE TO ENTERTAIN YOU!

If that bothers you, then blame Omni. I will get through my life how I want to and won’t be dragged down by the fucking bullshit that other writers do.

MY LIFE IS NOT A NARRARATAVE!

HOWEVER IT’S FUCKING SPELLED!

Now if your goal of reading my story is to get your rocks off, then get your pencil dicks out and get ready to fap away, we’re starting out the way i like it!

Our fucking story begins with me, in bed with another guy I met. I never got his name, nor do I remember what he looked like, but I remembered his uncut johnson quite vividly. I also remember how much of a needy fucker he was. One round he was already crying next to me.

Again, not here to tell a fucking story, so talking about feelings are out! But apparently, he wouldn’t shut up about some guy wanting to kill him. I mostly ignored him while trying to flush out the taste of pennies with a hotel mint, but something I said caught my attention.

“Thank you lady, I didn’t want to die a virgin.”

Well, that explains a fucking lot! I practically had to place landing lights on the goddamned bed just so he knew where to aim.

As for his imminent death, not my area anymore. After my fucking sister planted a sword in my goddamn skank of a face, I knew that my hero days were over. Go figured a goddamn child would free me from heavenly obligation, thanks to this prime thing, I can fuck all I want without consequence. No more scrounging for heaven coins! Fuck that shit. No more menial hero work!

“Sorry i’m complaining, you probably have better things to do than to pay attention to my suffering.” He said. He was giving me a puppy dog look.

Oh this fucker! I see what this is!

“Did you only take me to bed so I would get attached to you and agree to protect you?” I said.

“Yeah… I didn’t think it would work, the last three warriors didn’t go for it either.”

“Last three...” My eyes shot open, “How many women did you hook up with before you whored yourself to me?”

“Ummm… well, honestly, you’re the first female warrior I’ve found desperate for a shag...”

“Oh my fucking god, I don’t want to know!” I said as I leapt out of bed and reached for my clothes. “I don’t believe this, you’d rather fuck sweaty, hairy, fat, bar-dwelling adventurers before me? I was there all night!”

“I didn’t know you could fight...”

“Bullshit! I’ve been introducing myself as an angel! I even took out a drunkard early in the night!”

Suddenly, a man in ninja robes leapt through the window, and whipped out two scimitars. Me, in an instant, pulled out my fucking weapon and shot him between the eyes. The ninja fell to the ground lifeless.

The man I had been fucking looked ecstatic at this development.

“Oh thank you! I’ve been saved!”

“Well I haven’t!” I transformed backlace back into a pair of panties and slipped them on. I started putting the rest of my outfit back on.. “The Omniverse sucks, all I get is fucking table scraps!”

As I storm out the room, my head held high, I suddenly had a horrifying thought. I marched back into that room.

“Please tell me you were a bottom with all those guys tonight..” I said, as the taste of pennies still lingered in the back of my throat.