Molten Jam

[Zack Fair]

Night had fallen over the Ashen Steppes. Not that anyone could tell at a glance, in a land with a sky perpetually blackened by the haze of ash, but the civilizations of the land certainly knew. Work had stopped, and the night life had begun.
 
An outsider would have guessed that the Koopa Kingdom, and specifically Bowser’s stronghold, would be a place of rigid intensity at night. Indeed, there were troops of the various races that comprised of Bowser’s forces doing drills or going to bed early. Others, however, were off work.
 
A large, two story club was in the recreation area of Bowser’s fortress, and like other amenities in the king’s realm, it spared little expense. A bar was situated on each level, though the second story was only half as big, stopping to make a large balcony that overlooked the dance floor on the second level.
 
Zack Fair sat alone at a small table at the edge of the balcony. He was content as could be, drinking a unique liquor drink he’d never enjoyed before. As he did, he watched the Koopas down below dance to some ridiculous song that blared through the speakers, though he had to admit it was pretty catchy. After an exhausting journey and ordeal across the Ashen Steppes, he was beyond content to sit and enjoy the night. Most people liked to retreat and stay out of the public eye after a grand adventure, but Zack was happy to be in the midst of everything, even if it was quietly off to the side.
 
While he was gazing down at the various dance styles from the various member races of the Koopa Kingdom, he was suddenly jarred from his thoughts by a loud grunt, as well as the table and chairs around him shaking violently. He snapped his eyes across the table to see that a massive stone being was now seated across from him. It was a perfectly square creature with spikes on all sides and a face in the center that appeared to have a resting position of “extremely serious.” Zack had been working on his Koopa identification, so he recognized it as a Thwomp right away.
 
“Man, you scared me,” Zack was never too proud to admit when someone got him, and this dude’s arrival had certainly been unexpected.
 
“Zack Fair. My name is Lieutenant Stone,” the Thwomp abruptly and tersely greeted him, his tone matching his facial expression. Though it certainly didn’t match the jovial atmosphere of the club.
 
Zack stared skeptically for a moment as he processed the name given to him by this solid rock creature.  Finally, his tone was borderline accusatory when he spoke. “No, it’s not.”
 
“Why wouldn’t it be?” Stone was surprised by this foreigner’s reaction.
 
“Your name is really 'Stone?' Is that a common name amongst you…” Zack paused, and then immediately grimaced. He even put his right index finger in his ear awkwardly for a moment as he tried to think of a way to salvage this possibly racially charged statement. There was none, so he simply let himself finish the sentence, though with much less fervor. “…people?”
 
Stone returned a hard glare and let a brief silence fall between them. “What do you mean, ‘you people?’’
 
Zack bit his lip, then shrugged. He was already in it, so he might as well get his other thought out. “By the way, that was amazing that you didn’t destroy that chair. What is this furniture made of?”
 
“I’m here to speak with you regarding your services to the Koopa Empire,” Lieutenant Stone sharply steered the conversation back in its intended direction.
 
“I just did a favor, that’s all. I mean, come on, who doesn’t like fighting bandits and dragons?” Zack replied, taking a sip of his drink.
 
“Hah,” Stone didn’t so much as laugh, but speak his emotion in a plain tone. Zack raised an eyebrow at that, but the lieutenant continued on. “I would like to make your friendship with the Koopa Kingdom a little more official. The truth is that we could use more friends here in the harsh terrain that is the Ashen Steppes.”
 
“Official, how?” Zack asked as he leaned back in his seat, curiously. "I'm not really looking to join another army, at this point. Had a bad experience last time."
 
“We have a program for honorary admittance into the Koopa Troop’s ranks,” Stone explained, ignoring Zack's concern and hesitation. “There’s a few challenges and hurdles to cross, but I have confidence you would be well suited for them.”
 
“I mean, like we were talking about, I did just fight a whole bunch of bandits for you guys. Lost my whole team doing it,” Zack replied. “Doesn’t that get me a little bit of street cred around here?”
 
“It certainly does, but there are still procedures we must follow,” Stone responded. "Anyone interested must go through the proper steps."
 
Zack nodded and leaned back, slightly off put by the Thwomp’s lack of body language. Still, he understood. There were policies like this in every organization or government, no matter how large or small.
 
“Bureaucracy. Figures. So, what do I have to do?” Zack asked, taking another sip of his drink. “Fight more bad guys? Wear a turtle shell while I do it?”
 
“Just show up at the meeting room in the west wing of the castle in the morning,” Stone cut him off again, failing to find the humor in Zack's joke. “We’ll explain the rest to you then, if you’re interested.”
 
Zack raised his glass and nodded, then tilted his head as the Thwomp slowly levitated upwards. It then slammed down as it moved toward the exit, letting out a furious grunt on contact with the ground. It continued to repeat this method of transit as it departed.
 
Amused by the odd way of moving, Zack watched and laughed to himself. He then shook his head and went back to his people watching, perfectly entertained by the various dance styles of the different Koopa species.
 
He wasn’t totally sold on the idea of informally joining the ranks of this group, but they had been more or less good to him. That was enough for him to jump through a few hoops to at least stabilize the friendship. There was no telling what would be waiting for him in the morning, so he decided he’d better get some sleep. Zack stood up and downed the last of his drink, then dropped the glass on his table. He then shook his head and departed towards the guest barracks, hopeful to get a little bit of sleep.

[Zack Fair]

Morning arrived with little incident. Zack felt well rested without Miranda raising hell in the barracks this time, with her unique methods of waking the old team. He certainly needed a full night’s sleep after the events that lead him here. Now that he was up, moving, and felt refreshed, he walked right into the room that Stone had told him to be at, with a mug of coffee in his left hand. He entered the room and looked at the people all around it, taking a careful sip from the cup as he did. On one hand, he was careful not to burn his tongue with the hot liquid, but more importantly, he was making sure he didn’t stab himself with one of the unnecessary spikes decorating the mug.
 
Zack spotted Lieutenant Stone and began to move his way. Surprisingly, Stone’s odd anatomy didn’t actually make him stand out from the diversity of the Koopas. Zack found that to be amusing, but decided against commenting on it. Instead, he just stopped beside Stone, and a little bit forward so the Thwomp could see him, as he imagined turning wasn’t one of the creature’s sharpest skills.
 
“Morning,” Stone said, though it sounded like less of a greeting and more of a statement about the time of day it was.
 
Zack nodded in response, and took another sip of his coffee. He looked around the room at the others, curiously. He recognized a few species, but there were a few he didn’t think he had seen before. What really stood out, however, was a human man with shoulder length blonde hair, and a spear strung across his back.
 
“Who’s that guy?” Zack asked, gesturing to the man that didn’t see him, yet.
 
“The competition,” Stone replied.
 
“What?”
 
“Welcome!” a voice said, preventing Stone from answering or Zack from pressing him further.
 
The two instead looked over to see a Magikoopa greeting them. The blonde man and a Goomba stood nearby, while all the others continued about their business. It made sense, since this room was obviously a rally point for many different groups and operations.
 
“You two have been chosen to compete for the title of honorary member of the Koopa Troop,” the Magikoopa explained. “You have both proven yourself to be competent and powerful warriors in your own regard, but there is more to the Koopa Kingdom than brawn. You will undertake a challenge that will pit you against each other in a way that will test your skills, as well as immerse you in our culture.”
 
Zack crossed his arms as he listened, a frown beginning to form on his face.
 
“This event will be somewhat more intense than we normally do, and you will have some time to prepare yourselves, train, and get used to your team,” The Magikoopa continued. “Learn to work with them, for they are the squad you will operate with during your missions, should you succeed and join our ranks. Your recruiters have the rest of the details. Good luck.”
 
Zack turned to the Thwomp as the Magikoopa departed. His apparent adversary and Goomba companion also walked away, talking about something in a hushed tone that Zack couldn’t quite hear. He wasn’t terribly concerned with that, at the moment, though.
 
“Can I speak with you over by the statue of Bowser?” Zack asked in a dissatisfied voice.
 
“Which one?” Stone’s question was appropriate, considering that there were hundreds in this room.
 
Zack shook his head, realizing they had enough space now that the conversation would be private enough.
 
“You’re a recruiter?” Zack quickly asked. “I thought this was a friendship thing.”
 
“It is a ‘friendship thing,’” Stone responded. “You are proving your worth and we will reward you with admittance into our nation, should you succeed.”
 
“I told you, Stone, I’m not looking to join another army,” Zack shook his head as he replied. “Last time I did, it ended with me dead in a pool of my own blood. That would have been the end of it if I hadn’t been whisked away to this wonderful place.”
 
Stone didn’t seem to detect the sarcasm at the end of Zack’s statement, so he responded plainly. “I do not know your world, but it is not this one. That army is not here.” He paused and contemplated the depth of that statement. “Probably not here.”
 
Zack crossed his arms and turned to the side as he pondered. He was strongly considering walking out of this castle right now and having that be the end of it. “I’ve dealt with a lot of recruiters in my life, Stone. I know the things they’ll say in order to get another body on the frontlines. I’m not going to be one of them.”
 
Stone studied Zack for a moment, thinking before he spoke. “Just because I am a recruiter, does not mean I don’t have the interests of my people at heart. Having you on my squad is the best case, having you as a friend of my squad, willing to help us in times of need…that is also acceptable. Just because I know how to work our system does not mean I am any worse of a person for it.”
 
Zack tapped his foot on the ground as he thought. The Thwomp made a fair point, but Zack was very hesitant to get caught up with the wrong group once more. It couldn't hurt to give them a chance, in theory. After thinking about it, he looked over to Stone. “Just friends?”
 
“We will assist you when you need help, and we will respond to your calls for assistance,” Stone confirmed. “That is the meaning of our honorary Koopa Troop status.”
 
“Alright,” Zack finally agreed. “I’m in.”
 
“Excellent,” Stone still didn’t smile and his tone didn’t change, but he seemed to be speaking positively. “We should go meet your team for this challenge. You will need to practice hard if you are to win this game of bombsketball.”
 
“Excuse me, what?” Zack immediately interrupted the Thwomp and turned to fully face him again. “What did you say we’re playing?”
 
“Bombsketball. It is a popular sport in the Koopa Kingdom,” Stone explained, not seeing any issue with his words.
 
“Like…basketball with bombs?” Zack continued to press this issue. He wanted every drop of detail he could get.
 
“I suppose basketball is a derivative of bombsketball,” Stone conceded. He would have nonchalantly shrugged, had his anatomy allowed him.
 
“I’m pretty sure basketball came first,” Zack was quick to correct his stone companion.
 
“It really doesn’t matter,” Stone was finally showing an emotion. Frustration.
 
“It kind of does, to me,” Zack interjected.
 
“Regardless,” Stone took a loud, commanding tone. “You will be playing bombsketball, and I will guide you and your team to victory. We should go now, so that we can get to work that much sooner. We only have a few days to train.”
 
Zack nodded to confirm, then immediately shook his head in disbelief. “Alright. I won’t say it sounds good, but it sounds like a…” ‘Plan’ probably wasn’t the best word, either. “…thing.”
 
“Excellent,” Lieutenant Stone said, levitating upwards and causing Zack to take a few steps backwards. “Come with me! Our training begins immediately!”
 
Zack watched as the Thwomp made a powerful slam that inched him closer to the door. Zack took a few steps to catch up, and waited for stone to repeat the process. “Immediately” probably wasn’t the most accurate descriptor, but at least it gave him a little more time to wonder what he’d gotten himself into.

[Zack Fair]

Zack stepped into the gym, looking around as he did. It contained what seemed like a normal basketball court, with the exception that there weren’t any hoops to be seen. The decorations were also typical of the Koopa Kingdom’s facilities, in that they emphasized the same three things as usual: stone, lava, and Bowser.
 
Milling about the place were various Koopas of many different species and ethnicities. The ones on the court were dribbling solid black balls that seemed to function the same as basketballs, though each of the players had different means of doing so, given their respective anatomies. Others were playing defense and typically trying to impede the others. It looked a lot like a normal practice session, if one could ignore the glaring oddities.
 
Lieutenant Stone slammed down next to Zack with his usual immense force. If the Ex-SOLDIER knew one thing about the Thwomp, it was that he didn’t want to be under him when he came crashing down. Zack crossed his arms, while Stone narrowed his eyes into a glare as he looked at the others.
 
“So, just to get this straightened out off the bat…” Zack began to wonder aloud, earning himself a curious sideways glance from the Thwomp. “Is it ‘Coach Lieutenant’ or ‘Lieutenant Coach?’ ‘Coach Lieutenant’ doesn’t flow quite as well, but ‘Lieutenant Coach’ implies that there’s a higher ranking coach present. What do you think?”
 
“I am Lieutenant Stone,” the Thwomp firmly replied, finding no amusement in Zack’s ramblings.
 
Zack just laughed. He was definitely getting a feel for the guy’s probable reputation among his troops. “I’m going to go with Coach Lieutenant, I think.”
 
“Whatever. Listen up, now,” Stone brushed the proud super soldier’s words aside, and let out a sharp whistle.
 
Two of the Koopas dropped what they were doing, and immediately came over to them. The first was what Zack recognized as a Paratroopa. It was a typical Koopa that seemed to make up the core species of this nation, except that it had small wings attached to its blue shell. They were small and unimpressive, but at the same time they kept it hovering above the ground just fine. The other was a tall and incredibly imposing rectangular slab of stone, with a terrifying face. Zack knew this one, too. It was called a Whomp. Obviously there was some relation to Stone’s species. Though it was probably distant, it was still probably closer than any of the other Koopa tribes.
 
“This is Ranger,” Stone said, his eyes darting to the blue shelled paratroopa, who raised a hand to volunteer his identity. “He is one of our unit’s top scouts and has some experience with special operations and unconventional warfare.”
 
Zack nodded and slightly raised his hand to greet the flying Koopa.
 
“This is Wall,” Stone gestured to the Whomp, who towered over them and glared down at Zack silently. “He is one of our unit’s front line combatants. His skillset should be wildly apparent to you.”
 
Zack once again nodded his head in confirmation. It wasn’t hard to guess the use an army would have for a sentient slab of thick concrete. Still, he had one question…
 
“And no,” Stone suddenly cut off Zack before he could even begin to ask. “Those are not their real names. They are codenames, assigned by our squad. They are the best at this game in our division. They will be your teammates, for bombsketball is three versus three.”
 
Zack grinned in response, amused that Stone remembered their slightly awkward introduction. “Sounds good.”
 
“Now, let us begin. First, you must learn the rules and specifics of bombsketball,” Stone declared.
 
Zack held out his hands, gesturing to Ranger. The paratroopa understood, and passed the black ball he was holding to the ex-SOLDIER. Zack caught it with ease, and looked it over. He then tossed it up lightly a few times, never higher than his own head. Finally, he dropped it to the ground and efficiently dribbled it. He caught the ball and looked to Stone again. It felt and functioned exactly like a real, properly inflated basketball. Zack had never been a star player, but he enjoyed pickup games in the company building back in his own world. As a result, he viewed himself as a pretty decent player, for an amateur.
 
“The bomb you use to play the game will look slightly different, but function generally the same,” Stone said as he watched Zack acclimate himself to the practice ball. “We just don’t use live ordinance for practice.”
 
“Oh, of course. That would be dangerous,” Zack sarcastically agreed.
 
“The rules are similar to the game of basketball that you insist on comparing it to,” Stone seemed far too displeased by the seemingly fair comparison. “However, the key difference is the lack of hoops and a basket in which you place the ball.”
 
That made sense to Zack, since the first thing he noticed was the lack of goals.
 
“Instead, there are three walls on each side of the court. They are nearly indestructible, but a precise hit from the bomb you will be dribbling and passing will detonate the explosive and crumble the wall to pieces,” Stone explained.
 
“Sounds legit, so far,” Zack wasn’t letting his sarcasm show in his tone. He played it straight. “Slamming an armed bomb into the ground repeatedly while moving it close enough to cause an explosion in a precise spot.”
 
“Quite,” Once again it went over Stone’s head, but Ranger seemed to shoot Zack a knowing glance. The Thwomp just continued without incident. “This will obviously make the arena larger, but move you closer to the ultimate goal. Once the wall is destroyed, the opposing team will receive a replacement bomb, and it will continue. The first team to destroy all three will win.”
 
“And what happens if we run out of time?” Zack asked, curiously. “Are there some sort of sudden death rules?”
 
“There is no time limit,” Stone answered. “It may take five minutes or five weeks. You play until the three barricades are destroyed for either side.”
 
“Alright, I think I get the idea of it,” Zack said, taking the Buster Sword off he back and leaning it against a nearby rack. “Let’s practice some basics. Get used to each other’s styles.”
 
“What are you doing?” Wall the Whomp spoke up, looking at Zack’s massive sword.
 
“What?” Zack asked, pausing as he was confused by the question.
 
“Your sword, why are you putting it aside?” Ranger clarified, cocking his head in equal confusion.
 
“Because…you don’t use swords in basketball?” Zack couldn’t shake the feeling that this was some kind of trick question.
 
“This isn’t basketball. This is bombsketball,” Stone once more emphasized, very sternly.
 
Zack paused and shrugged. That was a good point. He was more than happy to pick the Buster Sword back up and place it on his back once more. He was far more comfortable with the giant slab of metal than without it, anyway. It was just something he had gotten used to. Being able to use it in a basketball game – or, bombsketball – was bizarre, but exciting.
 
Ranger and Wall spread out, while Zack stayed with Stone. They began the basic drill of passing the ball between themselves, as it was just something light to get them started.
 
“What about that other guy?” Zack asked Stone while they worked. “What can you tell me about him?”
 
“Not much, truly,” Stone commented. “I scouted you out, my colleague scouted him. The Magikoopa that we spoke to is one of the main recruiters that issues the challenges. I do know that he wields that spear quite formidably, and is very athletic. He will be a good challenge. I believe his name was Ashton.”
 
That was enough for Zack. All that really mattered was honing his own abilities. It a twisted, bizarre way, it all made sense. Odd circumstances often forged the strongest friendships. This was, for certain, an odd situation. By that logic, these Koopas and their battalion might end up being some of Zack’s closest allies.

[Zack Fair]

Days passed as the trio honed their skills and abilities. It didn’t take long to settle the team into defined roles. Zack was easily the well-rounded player who could do a little bit of everything. Ranger was far more mobile than his teammates and made for an offensive weapon. Wall, lastly, was a defensive machine with his ability to effortlessly impede forward movement and block shots.
 
They had developed a strong dynamic, but could only hope it was enough. They didn’t know much about Ashton’s team, as they trained in a completely different place, but had heard through the grapevine that the man’s two teammates were of the Koopa species known as Shy Guys and Dry Bones. It didn’t help them much, but Stone was able to formulate a few plays based around what they were likely to do. Anything was better than nothing
 
The time to practice had ended, though. Tomorrow was the big game. Word had spread about two outsiders serving as team captains in this unusual sport, and it had drawn some interest. Tickets were selling out and a news crew was even going to broadcast the game. That alone was a bit of a rarity, but it was probably as much of a morale move as it was a financial one. Zack remembered how boring and destitute the outer reaches of Bowser’s domain were.
 
The gym was empty and dark, lit only by the glow of the absurdly dangerous lava moat some engineer had insisted on building around the playing area. Zack stood near the edge, throwing the ball up at a red mark on the wall that simulated where the bomb would have to connect to score a point in the coming game. He caught each rebound, and threw it back up over and over. It was just last minute, mindless practice that focused on the fundamentals.
 
“Fair?” the voice of Ranger called out.
 
Zack looked over to see his two teammates entering the gym and approaching him. He stopped shooting the ball and instead caught it, turning to greet them with a smile. “Hey, guys.”
 
“What are you doing here so late?” Ranger questioned, curiously.
 
“Ah, couldn’t sleep. Might as well prep a little more,” Zack shrugged. “You guys?”
 
“Same,” Wall admitted with a scoff.
 
Zack chuckled. They seemed to be on the same wavelength, again. That had to be a good thing. So, he decided to press it a little further.
 
“What exactly do you guys have riding on this game?” Zack asked, passing the ball to Ranger as he did. “Were you just ordered to play, or is there more to it?”
 
“Both, really,” Ranger admitted as he caught the ball. “I like the sport. Always wanted to be a pro athlete. Getting to play on the big stage is a dream come true.”
 
Zack smiled as Ranger passed the ball to Wall, who fumbled it for a moment in his short arms. That was something they’d been working on, but the Whomp’s anatomy wasn’t very forgiving.
 
“For the unit,” Wall answered upon catching it. “Anything to strengthen us. Having a prime as our friend and ally? I will endure the challenge alongside you, so that you might save my brothers and sisters another time.”
 
“I like the honesty, guys,” Zack said as the ball was passed back him. He tossed it up and down for a brief moment as he thought. “I think we’ll do alright. And I’m looking forward to fighting alongside you, should it all work out.”
 
Zack held up the ball and looked it over. It was hard to believe this would be replaced by a live bomb tomorrow. He didn’t like dealing with explosives in all of his military days. There was simply too much that could go wrong and so little control one person had over it. He’d have to get used to it, though.
 
“Bombs. Craziest thing,” Zack muttered his thoughts aloud.
 
“You should have seen it before,” Ranger commented, offhandedly. “We used to play with Bob-ombs, but there was a strike and a small rebellion, so we have to settle for standard, bouncy bombs. They don’t have quite the same lift, but it works.
 
“I…” Nope. Zack decided to not even touch that one. This was already weird enough.
 
“For now, we should rest,” Wall decided, noting that their leader was once again overwhelmed by the proceedings. “Our opponents will be challenging, and we should be prepared and energized.”
 
Ranger bobbed his head and began to depart, while Wall followed after him. Zack smiled and looked at the wall, tossing the black ball at the markings one last time before following after them. One way or another, tomorrow would be very interesting.

[Zack Fair]

The cameras went live, and a beautiful brunette woman stood before them with her microphone in hand. Behind her was the grand bombsketball court, with music blaring in from the speakers as the pregame entertainment was underway. The seats were full, and she was grateful that the Koopa Kingdom was allowing her network to broadcast this game. This was pretty unheard of, so she had to do it right. She cleared her throat, and the cameraman went live.
 
“Good evening, viewers! I’m Brianne Salter and this is another broadcast from the Vasty Sports Network!” she announced with beaming energy. “Tonight we have a very special presentation! The Koopa Kingdom has graciously allowed us to show their thrilling sport of bombsketball!”
 
The camera zoomed out just a touch, to show that she was standing next to Ashton, the blond haired captain of one of the teams. Ashton, however, paid no attention to the camera, and was instead staring intently at Brianne. When the reporter turned to face him, she jumped when she realized how close he was standing.
 
“Sup, girl?” the man asked casually, as if he weren’t about to participate in some ridiculous deathmatch.
 
Brianne was a good reporter, though, and this wasn’t a new thing to her. She brushed right past it. “Ashton, you are the captain of the inappropriately named ‘Blue Team,’ considering you have a Shy Guy in your ranks that is solid red. What can you tell me about his skill set and what he brings to the team?”
 
“Well, baby, it’s simple,” Ashton waved his hand. “He can fly, and that’s pretty awesome considering two thirds of his opponents can’t. We thought outside the box on this one.”
 
“Uh huh,” Brianne tried not to roll her eyes on a live broadcast. “And your other teammate, the Dry Bones? What does he offer to Blue Team?”
 
“Dry Bones is pretty dope, too,” Ashton shrugged. “He doesn’t need to have his limbs attached to his body to use them, which I don’t even have to tell you why that’s useful.”
 
“Quite,” Brianne nodded. “And lastly, what about you, the man competing for admittance into the Koopa Kingdom? What do you do that your team needs, and by extension offer to the forces of Bowser, should you be accepted?”
 
“Honey, I’m the best spear wielder this side of the Nexus. That gives me long game,” Ashton batted his eyebrows as he spoke. “I’ve been fighting and doing this stuff for a long time, so running up and down a court a few times isn’t a big deal. That other guy may be a prime, but if that’s all he’s bringing to the table, he’s in big trouble.”
 
“Thank you, Ashton, and good luck,” Brianne nodded with a return smile.
 
“And after the game, if we cou-“
 
Ashton’s proposition was cut short, and the camera panned to the other side of Brianne, where Zack stood. Except Zack didn’t know it was his turn to interview, as he was talking to someone off screen.
 
“And now, we also have the captain of the Red Team, Zack Fair,” Brianne said into the microphone, before noticing that Zack wasn’t even paying attention. “Zack.”
 
“Huh? Oh!” Zack snapped his head to look at the camera, and gave a cheeky nod and a wink. Brianne bit her tongue again. Every athlete…
 
“Zack, you are a prime, but the ability to summon anything from Omnilium won’t be much use in a fast paced game of bombsketball,” Brianne pushed on, like the professional she was. “What else do you bring to the table?”
 
“Well, on top of being a specimen of athleticism where I came from, I’m also pretty good at basketball,” Zack explained, waving his right hand and shrugging. “A lot of it should translate over pretty well.”
 
“If you say so,” Brianne nodded, obviously knowing understanding the differences in the sports better than ShinRa’s once finest. “Tell me about the blue shelled paratroopa that plays for Red Team, disregarding the obvious mix-up in your teams’ names.”
 
“Oh, he’s a champ,” Zack said with a smile. “He played semi-pro, and has been doing this all his life. He’s fast and mobile, and can cover the court in a heartbeat. He’s our superstar.”
 
“Fascinating!” Brianne replied with a warm smile of her own, pleased with that summary. “And lastly, you have a defensive master who has been given the nickname ‘Wall.’ Would you care to elaborate on how he earned that name?”
 
“Yes, of course. That’s because he is literally a wall,” Zack said with a total straight face. After all, there was no better way to describe a Whomp. He had to embrace the insanity or get run over by it.
 
There was a beat, while Brianne stared blankly at Zack. Ever the expert, she just carried on.
 
“That’s all from the courtside, everyone. Stay tuned for our exciting broadcast right after these messages. Two teams will enter the arena and compete for a single incredible honor! For one man awaits the privilege of acceptance into the Koopa Troop, and for the other, a fiery death in the moat of lava that surrounds this court!”
 
“…Wait, what?”

[Zack Fair]

Pregame music pumped into the arena through the loud sound system, and Zack stood near the center of the court, doing his final stretches. There were no uniforms or anything remotely team related given to him. He just had to identify his allies and opponents. Then again, that wasn’t too hard.
 
Across from him, Ashton stood with his spear in hand. Ashton’s teammates stood back and flanked him on either side, while Zack’s own companions mirrored that formation. A goomba stood at the center, just between Zack and Ashton. The brown, armless creature effortlessly bounced a large black bomb on its head, with little concern for what would happen if it were to detonate. A white ghost known as a Boo hovered to the side, with an adorable white and black striped shirt and a whistle on a string. That thing was supposedly the referee of this game.
 
Zack drew the Buster Sword, holding it tightly in his right hand. The game would open just the same as a game of basketball, with a jump ball. Zack knew he could touch the ceiling of this building with a single jump, but also knew it was about speed on the opening play. The plan was simple: get the ball to Ranger.
 
The music stopped, and the whistle blew. The goomba gave a powerful hop that knocked the ball high into the air, and the two human players reacted immediately. Zack and Ashton leaped upwards, extending their respective weapons towards the bomb. Zack got there first, and with the tip of the Buster Sword he shoved the airborne ball backwards, towards his Koopa teammate.
 
While the humans landed, Ranger caught the ball and began to dribble it. He hovered less than a foot above the ground, allowing him all the mobility of flight, but with a low dribble that made it difficult to steal. Ranger moved forward with terrifying efficiency, juking the Shy Guy with a simple spin maneuver and dodging Ashton’s outstretched spear. The dry bones, however, ripped its own left arm out of its socket and swung its right arm at Ranger, catching the unsuspecting paratroopa off guard. Ranger fell to the floor and the bomb bounced free. Ashton was quick to recover it and move it the opposite direction.
 
“How is that not a foul!?” Zack shouted to the ghostly referee, who immediately responded by freezing and covering its eyes with its hands.
 
“Zack!” Lieutenant Stone screamed from the sidelines. “Do not look at the referee, or he will miss the call!”
 
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Zack cried out, but he looked over to see Ashton pass the bomb past Wall, towards the Shy Guy.
 
Wall was unable to jump and prevent the aerial pass, and could only watch helplessly as the Shy Guy kicked the bomb into the red mark on the wall, detonating the first barricade. They had scored the first point. Zack ignored the mostly useless screaming of the crowd and also Stone, from the sideline, and instead jogged towards the ruined goal, where Wall was preparing to pass the new bomb inbounds.
 
Zack slid to a stop as Wall passed the explosive to him, and caught it in his left hand. He turned and began dribbling it up court, but the dry bones and shy guy both approached him with double coverage. The shy guy swatted the bomb from Zack’s hands, but Zack reached out with the Buster Sword and lightly tapped the escaping ordinance upwards before it could leave his reach.
 
The bomb lightly popped upwards, enough that Zack was able to twist the Buster Sword around and cradle it. The dry bones tried to reach for the ball, but Zack continued to skillfully keep his large sword between the bomb and his opponents. Since he realized fouls were apparently acceptable, he shoved the shy guy aside with his shoulder and passed the bomb to Ranger by catapulting it from the massive blade. The paratroopa easily caught the ball and hurled it into their barricade, causing another explosion that signified the score becoming tied.
 
“Plan Halloween!” Ashton shouted, grabbing the new bomb. Zack tilted his head. What the hell did that mean?
 
Ashton was insanely quick to get the replacement bomb to his dry bones companion. Zack barely realized play had resumed, but quickly charged towards the ball carrier. The dry bones was in a full sprint, and dribbled the ball far ahead of himself to match his own momentum. Suddenly, though, he made a move that sent the crowd into a thunderous applause and fit of cheering. The skeletal being flung each arm sideways, and they disconnected from their appropriate joints. Before he knew what had happened, Zack was knocked off his feet by a flying bone arm slamming into his chest. Ranger was hit just the same, and both of them were effectively out of commission.
 
The dry bones closed the gap by dribbling the bomb off of its skull. It then lowered its head so it could swing upwards and head-butt the explosive into the goal for their second point. What it didn’t account for, however, was the Whomp it was facing. Wall approached from the side and the dry bones never saw him coming, despite the screams from his teammates down court. The massive slab of stone collided with the tiny skeleton with all his force and sent it careening to the side. The dry bones collapsed after a few steps and exploded into a pile of bones.
 
The crowd was on their feet, jumping and screaming as Wall passed the bomb to Zack. As soon as he had possession, the ex-SOLDIER broke into his own sprint while dribbling the device. Ashton ran towards him and stabbed at it with his spear, a desperate attempt to stop the forward momentum. Zack swatted the spear away with the Buster Sword, however, and continued on. When he got close enough, Zack hurled the bomb at their own goal, which shattered after another satisfying explosion. The score was 2 – 1.
 
The shy guy had reassembled the dry bones, so the teams were even once again. Ashton passed the ball inbounds to his red, floating teammate. The shy guy moved much the same as Ranger did with the ball, hovering low to the ground and taking advantage of his low stature to make short dribbles. He moved effortlessly past Zack, but as soon as Ranger closed in on him, he passed back to Ashton. Ashton dribbled forwards, but Wall impeded his immediate pathway. This didn’t faze the man in the least, however, as he stabbed his spear into the ground and proceeded to pole vault right over the Whomp. Wall reacted by kicking the spear, but Ashton released the bomb before he went tumbling to the ground.
 
“Dammit!” Ranger shouted as the bomb collided with the barricade, shattering it as well and tying the game.
 
“Time out!” Zack shouted, looking to the referee. Once again, the Boo shielded its eyes. “For crying out loud…are there time outs!?”
 
“Time out! Time out!” Stone screamed from the sideline as he violently levitated up and then slammed down multiple times.
 
Someone blew a whistle. Zack didn’t know who, other than it surely wasn’t that poor excuse of a referee they had. He knew they wouldn’t get a lot of time, so they had to make it quick.
 
“Gather around!” Stone ordered his team, as the opposing team did the same on their end of the court.
 
“Come on, Wall!” Ranger shouted as they moved to Stone, looking back at the slow moving and heavy breathing Whomp as he did.
 
“Just…just a moment…” Wall panted as he struggled to keep up.
 
They gathered around Stone, who somehow looked angrier than normal.
 
“This is absurd,” Zack said as he put his hands on his hips. “It’s an offensive throw down, and why the hell didn’t you tell me what constitutes a foul?”
 
“What is a foul?” Stone asked, but dismissed it before Zack could respond. “Never mind! Wall, you played smart defense, but they have figured out the air attack works. Ranger, you will have to play defense. Wall, you have to be on offense and help Zack.”
 
“I could barely make it to the bench Lieutenant…Coach…” Wall wheezed out between breaths.
 
“Actually, we’re going with Coach Lieutenant,” Zack corrected him.
 
“Dammit, Fair!” Stone screamed to get him focused again. “We get the ball this time. Wall, you start at midfield, and Zack, do that fancy stuff with the sword again. Utilize Wall as cover. Get it in, and do not let them get their hands on it. It’s not that I do not trust Ranger, but he is not a defensive player.”
 
“If there’s no such thing as a foul, just start wailing on them, dude,” Zack suggested to his massive teammate, who seemed to appreciate that idea.
 
The whistle blew, and the three began to job to their respective places. Ranger went to pass the bomb in, Wall went towards the center, and Zack was somewhere between them. Zack just took a deep breath as explosive device left Ranger’s hands, and bounced right into his. Zack started to dribble and turned towards the opposition.
 
Only one point to go, for better or worse.

[Zack Fair]

The opponents closed in fast, and Zack quickly got himself close to Wall. The Whomp provided an incredible moving shield, while Zack used the Buster Sword to protect the bomb from the other direction. In a normal situation, this would be airtight, but Ashton’s spear and the dry bones’ crafty use of its appendages meant that they were far from safe in their movement.
 
Zack swatted at the shy guy with his sword, catching the creature’s head with the broad side and sending it rolling away. He then had to juke to dodge the repeated attempts to get the bomb from the dry bones. Not to mention he didn’t see Ashton.
 
“In front, Fair!” Wall suddenly shouted.
 
Zack kicked the dry bones and sent it stumbling away, then looked down. Ashton stabbed his spear underneath Wall’s legs and hit the bomb. Though he had to step back and make a few corrective maneuvers, Zack still managed recover it before it got away. He turned back towards their objective, and could see that Ashton was standing right in front of Wall.
 
“Fall on him!” Zack ordered his stone teammate, as soon as the idea popped in his head.
 
Wall realized the merit of that, and immediately belly flopped forward. Ashton loudly cursed, and held his hands up. With no time to dodge, he could only try and catch the massive monster. He stopped Wall at a forty-five-degree angle, but holding him in place effectively took him out of commission. The problem was, it also took Wall out of the game.
 
Zack once again smacked the shy guy away, then returned the Buster Sword to its resting place on his back. The goal was in sight, and the only thing between him and it was the dry bones. He continued to dribble, and charged forwards.
 
The dry bones ran right at Zack, willing to do anything to stop him. He didn’t account for Zack’s next action, however. Zack caught the bomb and leaped straight forward, his right leg fully extended. The two beings collided, Zack’s right foot meeting the front of dry bones’ face. Once again, the momentum was too much for the skeletal being’s body, and the head snapped clear of its neck.
 
The head hit the floor, and Zack landed right on top of it. The momentum was still there, so the super soldier found himself actually surfing across the gym floor, to the great amusement of the crowd. Sliding on his opponent’s skull like it was a skateboard meant that he covered the distance in almost no time. As he got near the edge, Zack leaped from the skull and flew towards the target, holding the bomb in his right hand. Below him, the skull bounced off the barricade and ricocheted right into the pursuing shy guy.
 
Zack didn’t see where the skull ended up. All he saw was the target he was rapidly approaching. This hadn’t been part of the plan. He was about to slam dunk a live bomb into a perfectly good wall. Point blank was not where he wanted to be, having seen the previous four blasts.
 
This is going to su-
 
He never got to finish the thought. With no choice except to commit, Zack slammed the bomb into the red marking as hard as he possibly could, and was immediately engulfed in the resulting explosion. Fire and ruined stone surrounded him. His ears were ringing. He had no idea how he got there, but the next thing he knew he was lying on his back near where the free throw line would hypothetically be. The piercing noise in his ears faded away and was replaced by equally deafening cheering.
 
Everyone was celebrating. Even Lieutenant Stone appeared to be, though he was still violently slamming up and down with his typical scowl. Zack couldn’t believe it. They had won. And somehow that hadn’t been a personal foul, or even traveling.
 
He groaned as he climbed to his feet, and was near immediately tackled by Ranger. He held a hand up to slow the approaching Wall down, but his insistence in joining the celebration could not be swayed. Zack could only laugh as he tried to stay standing amidst the camaraderie. It was always good to be a part of a win.
 
He looked around, trying to find that reporter. He wanted that post-game interview, but she was nowhere to be seen. He scanned the crowd two or three more times, then just barely caught a glimpse of her. Ashton and Brianne were slipping out one of the side doors, and Ashton’s hand was firmly gripping the woman’s posterior.
 
Zack shook his head. Go figure. Still, he certainly got what he came for, fame be damned. He turned and held his hand up, proceeding to high five each of his teammates again as they moved back towards the sideline to continue the celebration.

[Zack Fair]

Some time later, Zack was sitting on a bench in a typically evil looking locker room. He was wiping away the last bits of ash and soot from his face, having cleaned himself up from the explosive slam dunk. It was worth it to make friends, though. Certainly, he not only was officially an ally of these Koopas, now, but he also had a good working relationship with them. He saw the reasoning behind all of the events leading up to this moment, even if he couldn’t get past the insanity of what he’d gone through.
 
While he cleaned up, he was reading a Dataverse message on his flip phone. An offensive would soon be taking place at Death Mountain, attempting to bring down the dragon Volvagia. He’d heard it whispered of in his travels, but assumed the beast was one of Omni’s permanent decorations to this land. If it could be killed, it would make everything a little easier for these folks. This is what Drake had been talking about, it had to be. Colonel also appeared to have some sort of relation with this group. Given his own experience bringing down large monsters, Zack knew he had to go and check this out.
 
Plus, free drinks.
 
Stone slammed down beside him, but it no longer even fazed the former SOLDIER. He looked over and saw him, alongside Ranger and Wall.
 
“Good work, guys,” Zack said, tossing the towel aside and pocketing his phone.
 
“It was an honor!” Wall boasted, pumping the fists at the end of his short arms.
 
“Can’t wait to share the field of battle with you!” Ranger chimed in.
 
“Quite,” Stone said calmly as Zack stood up. “Welcome, friend of the Koopas, Zack Fair. We look forward to a long and prosperous friendship with you.”
 
Zack smiled, then looked down as Ranger handed him a green shell, much like the one the paratroopa had. The only thing missing was the wings. He held it up and inspected it curiously, trying to think what to make of it.
 
“That shell marks your status as our ally. We protect you, and you protect us,” Stone explained. “As agreed.”
 
“As agreed,” Zack echoed, and hooked it to the back of his belt for the time being. “Thanks guys. We’ll be in touch.”
 
“Where will you go, now?” Ranger asked, watching as Zack made sure his sword and equipment were secure.
 
“Drake Oneir was about the furthest thing I’ve ever seen from a saint, yet he still gave his life to try and talk Bowser into fighting this dragon,” Zack explained. “So I’m going, if nothing else.”
 
“Yes, I heard that we will not be participating,” Stone remarked. “My thoughts aside, I wish you luck.”
 
“Thanks, Stone. Ranger, Wall, you guys take care. I’ll see you around,” Zack said with a friendly smile.
 
They all exchanged their farewells, and before long, Zack was on his way out of the castle. He felt pretty good, but knew that could change in an instant in these wastelands. That looming concern was offset a bit now that he knew he could take shelter in the Koopa’s domain. That whole experience had been strange and unsettling, but he was better for it. Now, he needed to get back fighting, which was something he was good at and comfortable with.
 
Next stop: Death Mountain.