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I'm A Grown Ass Man
#1
And Grown Ass Men Know How to Cook!

Here is a thread for all of you out there that know how to throw down in the kitchen! Post your recipes! (I will totally try them if they sound good!)

Here is one from me:

Mexican Lasagna

What you'll need:
2 pounds ground beef
2 bell peppers (Whatever colors you like)
1 onion
1 can of chili flavored beans
Jalapenos
2 cans of Mexican Stewed tomatoes(I prefere S&W Brand)
2 to 3 packets of your favorite taco seasoning
1 can of sliced black olives
Lots of shredded cheese. (Colby and Monterrey Jack I like)
2 cans of your favorite re fried beans
package of corn tortillas
Fresh lettuce, tomatoes, onion, and sour cream(Toppings)

Instructions:
1)Brown the ground beef in a pot on the stove with the bell peppers and the onion chopped up with it.
2) Drain the the beef
4) Add the stewed tomatoes (I take two knives and scissors cut the tomatoes because the chunks are too big, but you need stewed tomatoes because the flavor is the best.)
5)Add Taco seasoning, chili beans, and black olives(Save a few black olives for later) and let cook on medium to medium high.
6) Preheat the oven at 400, and in another pot warm up your re fried beans.
7) Take a casserole dish and spread vegetable grease on the bottom. (Not alot, just enough for a thin film of grease to cover it.)
8) layer the casserole dish to the top in this order: Corn tortillas-refried beans-meat sauce-cheese.
9)At the top end it with tortillas, cheese and sprinkle black olive slices with jalapeno slices on top
10) Bake in the oven for 30 minutes
11) Take it out and let it sit for 10 minutes
12) Use Sour cream, lettuce, tomatoes, etc as toppings.
12) ENJOY MOTHER F*CKERS!
Dante's Abyss 2015
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Mark Twain Wrote:"The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug."
#2
My cooking

Gourmét Toast
You will need:
Bread
Toaster
Knife
Chocolate Spread
Bourbon Biscuits
Self-Loathing

Instructions:
1) Toast the bread slightly
2) Spread way too much chocolate spread on
3) Place 3-30 layers of Bourbon biscuits on.
4) Put the pieces together
5) Cry
6) Voila! Your depressing breakfast is ready to be served on a dirty plate
Deaths: 0
#3
Oh my goodness, I was looking for a thread like this! Big Grin

Chocolate Bird Nests

What you will need:
  • 8 ounces semi-sweet chocolate, finely-chopped
    2 cups thin pretzel sticks, lightly crushed
    Some kind of nuts, peanuts, almonds, whatever, or even marshmallows I don't care

Directions:
Coat a six-cup muffin pan with cooking spray; remember to put in those cute little paper muffin cups and spray them down. Put the chocolate in a heat-proof bowl and set the bowl on a saucepan of simmering water(but do not let the bowl actually touch the water Just let it slowly melt). Stir the chocolate until it has melted into a smooth, goopy state.

Remove the bowl from the saucepan and stir in the broken pieces of the pretzel sticks. Scoop chocolate-pretzel mixture into the prepared muffin cups. Make an indentation in each to form a nest. Chill until the nests are set, probably for like, I don't know, three hours or so.

Fill the best nests with candies or other things that look vaguely like bird's eggs. VOILA, you are the chef, it is you!

Auntie Anne's Soft Pretzels

What you're gonna need:
  • 1/2 cup of brown sugar.
    2 and 1/2 tablespoons yeast.
    2 cups warm water.
    3 tablespoons oil.
    4 and 1/2 cups flour (or more)
    2 cups hot water
    1 and 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
    Pretzel salt (however much you want, I'm not gonna stop you if you dump the whole Dead Sea on there)
    Melted butter

Directions:
Preheat your oven to 450°. Mix the first five ingredients; allow dough to rise for 15 minutes. Roll and shape into pretzel twists!

Combine 2 cups hot water and baking soda; dip pretzels into this mixture. Let them drain on paper towels. Place them on a cookie sheet and sprinkle with pretzel salt. Bake 10 to 12 minutes until golden brown. Dip in the melted butter or drizzle the butter over them. DONEEE

Quoted from the Leaning Tower Popcorn Recipe from the "101 Things To Do With Popcorn" recipe book:

What you will need:
  • 1/4 cup of butter or margarine, melted
    1/2 teaspoon of seasoned salt
    1/2 teaspoon of dried basil
    8 cups of popped popcorn

Directions:
In a small bowl, stir together the butter, seasoned salt, and basil. Pour over popcorn in a large bowl and stir to coat. Makes 8 servings. Wow, that was easy.

Quoted from the October Ale recipe from "The Redwall Cookbook"

What you will need:
  • Two(2) cups ginger ale.
    One(1) cup grape juice.
    Optional one(1) teaspoon of sugar.

What to do:
Mix the ingredients together and serve chilled. I personally really like this recipe 'cause it takes like, two seconds. Also it's freakin' delicious.
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Gamzee Makara Wrote:S’aight. After all, dogs have a tendency to motherfuckin’ bite.
#4
I totally misread that first sentence as "and grown ass men know how to cock!"

It took me a bit to understand why that was followed by recipe talk...

ANYWAY

Basic crepe recipe (more for beginners than for someone who knows his stuff, but I think some might like to knowSmile

Ingredients:
1 cup all-purpose flour, 2 eggs, 1/2 cup milk, 1/2 cup water, 1/4 teaspoon salt, 2 tablespoons butter (melted)


Prep
10 minutes

Cook
20 minutes

Ready In
30 minutes

In a large mixing bowl, whisk together the flour and the eggs. Gradually add in the milk and water, stirring to combine. Add the salt and butter; beat until smooth.

Heat a lightly oiled griddle or frying pan over medium high heat. Pour or scoop the batter onto the griddle, using approximately 1/4 cup for each crepe. Tilt the pan with a circular motion so that the batter coats the surface evenly.

Cook the crepe for about 2 minutes, until the bottom is light brown. Loosen with a spatula, turn and cook the other side. Serve hot.
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#5
I've been thinking about trying this recipe, but I'm doubtful about it producing the desired result... nevertheless, candied orange slices and chocolate are amazing. 10/10 would recommend.
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New to the Omniverse? Don't be afraid to PM me for assistance!
Gamzee Makara Wrote:S’aight. After all, dogs have a tendency to motherfuckin’ bite.
#6
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Curious about me and the characters I play? See the 'Staff' page! See also the rosters for my characters Samus Aran or Enel if you'd like to see examples of well-formatted rosters. Hope you enjoy the Omniverse!
#7
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I really love this recipe, it's easy and it's delish! And gluten-free as an added bonus Smile
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#8
And Im over here like, "I made a steak last night."
"I've been neglected, harassed, beaten, and diminished all my life. What motivates me to continue? The glory of proving people wrong. Being worth more than the numbing existence offered me. To be a hero." - Amber
#9
This is a pretty good thing to try. :frogbon:
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New to the Omniverse? Don't be afraid to PM me for assistance!
Gamzee Makara Wrote:S’aight. After all, dogs have a tendency to motherfuckin’ bite.
#10
I don't have a recipe, but you all need to try a Christmas pudding with Maltesers stuck together with melted Chocolate Orange.
Deaths: 0


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