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+--- Thread: Another Sticky Situation (/showthread.php?tid=804)
Another Sticky Situation - Harry Potter - 08-27-2017
For neither the first nor the last time, Heidi awakens face down naked on a cold floor, with bubble gum in her hair and no recollection of how she got there.
With grit and determination she pushes herself up off the floor, her head spinning, a dull haze obscuring her vision. She blinks her pale pink eyes, then blinks again, and still the world doesn’t come into focus. She shakes her head, her blonde pigtails swishing as she does, and the Nexus comes into view.
She is standing on the wide rim of the Fountain, facing the gate to Coruscant and a pair of stormtroopers. Heidi keeps her head tilted as she scans the entrances to various verses, but does not go around the rim of the fountain to check the other side. The only signs of life she sees are the stormtroopers.
Heidi smiles hopefully as she she decides to approach the men in the white suits, and then catches sight of her reflection in the Nexus fountain. She pouts cutely as she eyes her glorious nakedness, and decides she needs come clothes.
She begins to blow a big pink bubble with her chewing gum.
***
The storm troopers do not even whisper to each other as they watch the naked young Prime huff and puff for three minutes straight, slowing blowing a gigantic pink bubble with her gum.
***
Heidi is beginning to get light headed as the bubble grows. Her feet start to lift from the ground, and then it pops, sending an echoing bang around the Nexus and splattering gum all over Heidi. She straightens her blonde pigtails as she observes her new outfit in the reflection from the fountain.
A high pink and white striped top to cover her ample cleavage, a fun and flirty pink miniskirt, and her sparkling white tennis shoes, the soles glowing softly with light. A tiny and extremely fashionable pink evening bag hangs at her hip by a thin strap. Satisfied, Heidi hops down off the rim of the fountain and makes a beeline for the stormtroopers, her pigtails bouncing.
She chews her gum as she walks, occasionally popping a small bubble and listening to the satisfying, resounding crack echo around. The Stormtroopers get nervous as she approaches, Heidi’s big vacant smile doing precisely nothing to alleviate their concern. One of them manages to clear his throat and issue a question through his helmet.
“Are you new here?” he asks the Prime, holding his blaster tightly.
Heidi takes a moment to look around, chewing her gum nervously for a second before answering. “Where’s here?” she asks in an extremely high pitched squeak.
“That’s a yes,” says the other Stormtrooper. “Ok, we’re gonna have to run you through a background screen, make sure you aren’t a threat to yourself or others, get you set up to serve your military stint, and get you full Coruscant citizenship. Would you step this way, ma’am?” he asks, gesturing towards the gates.
“Oh,” squeaks Heidi, despite not fully understanding the Stormtrooper.. “Coruscant? Is Optix there?”
The Stormtrooper sighs. “Anybody in the Omniverse worth anything is in Coruscant. But if you think you might have friends here, check your phone. They might have kept the same number they did in your universe.”
Heidi nods and the stormtrooper, and then smiles. The stormtroopers shift uncertainly.
“Oh,” squeaks Heidi again in her absurdly high pitched voice, as she reaches into her tiny purse and pulls out a sparkling pink cell phone covered in gleaming plastic gems. She chews her gum loudly as she browses her contacts, hmmming to herself. After about a minute she squeals, causing the storm troopers to tense and grab their weapons tightly.
“Someone is active! My friend Luci!” Heidi exclaims. “I’ma call her.”
Heidi leaves the phone on speaker so the troopers can hear Luci’s cool ringback song.
Fuck the police, fuck fuck the police
Fuck the police, fuck fuck the police
Heidi wiggles her hips half heartedly, but the troopers do not want to join her. After a moment, the call goes to voicemail, and Luci’s voice comes over the speakerphone.
“Hey it’s Luci, President of the Coruscant T5 Westside Knife Ear Warrirors, wanted street terrorist and organized crime boss. I can’t be reached now, as I am probably committing violent acts of treason against the Empire or murdering its sovereign citizens due to their ties to rival street gangs. Leave a message under the full understanding that it will be intercepted. And if you’re calling about the couch from Omni-list, it’s still here, go behind the alley at the corner of 3rd and Asimov and ask for Roach. Thanks.”
There is a beep. The stormtroopers share a glance.
“Hiiiiiii Luuuuuci!” Heidi squeals loudly into the phone, causing the guards to actually jump back a step. “It’s me Heeeeeeeeidi!” she adds unnecessarily. “You’re in Coruscant, how coooool! I wanna meet uuuuuup with you, I’m headed in now. We’ll get in lots of trouble, it’ll be super funsies. Hit me back, biyas!”
Heidi grins happily at the guards. “Okey, I’ll come in.”
One of the troopers presses a button on his belt. A loud alarm rings, and a bright red flashing light atop the gates starts to spin. The storm troopers level their guns at Heidi, who rolls her eyes.
“You are denied access to Coruscant due to your communications with anti-empire insurgency forces and conspiracy to commit criminal activities!” roars one of the storm troopers.
Heidi just smiles, and cracks her neck, her pigtails bobbing. She closes her eyes, and when she opens them, they are glowing bright neon pink.
“I just want to see my friend,” she explains, in the same squeaky voice, but this time with a deadly calm.
“Step back or we will open fire!” the other trooper promises.
Heidi eyes the troopers for a long moment. Then, she makes as if to lunge at them. The troopers gasp and fumble with their guns, and Heidi giggles.
Heidi turns and walks away, her miniskirt swishing behind her.
This is one war Luci would have to fight without her.
***
RE: Another Sticky Situation - Harry Potter - 09-02-2017
***
Perhaps it is the wisps of vanilla flowing subtely through the cracks in the vine-covered gate. Perhaps it is the lilac, the magnolia, the jasmin, the wysteria, the sweet pea.
Perhaps it is simply the promise of life that leads Heidi to push open the gates to the Tangled Green and step forth.
***