+- Omni Archive (https://omni.zulenka.com)
+-- Forum: Administration Forums (https://omni.zulenka.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=5)
+--- Forum: Joining (https://omni.zulenka.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=7)
+--- Thread: Atelos (/showthread.php?tid=683)
Atelos - Atelos - 11-06-2014
Character name: Atelos
Character source: Original
Character history:Born and raised by a family of Ancient Sparta. However, his village was known as heretics by the others…His village had mastered the arts of pyromancy and enchanting., Atelos was known as the softy of his village and could never bring himself to harm those around him. By the time he was 8 he had lost every fight during his child sparring sessions and has suffered innumerable amounts of wounds from the people he spends time with every day. He could not bring himself to harm the family that has been so kind to him. Out of pity, his village had given him a spiked glove enchanted with the pyromancy his village had mastered. However by the time he was 17, a neighboring Spartan village had invaded his village and had kidnapped Athelos in order to learn their ways. Yet as he was being taken to their altar room he broke free and subdued his captors. The vengeful beast within him grew and he gave no mercy to his kidnappers, taking the blows from his captors as he has done all those past years. He finally escaped and ran to his home village in Sparta only to find it in ruins, just conquered back by the Spartan Army. Devastated, he shambles back to the pile of ashes and bones of the place he used to call home. The only remnants was his fathers gleaming, bronze shield with the same enchantment as his gloves had. Isolated from his town, he took his father's shield and his glove and left Sparta permanently, carrying his only piece of home on him. Many say that after this day he had a permanent red aura about him, very few said to have seen blue and have lived to tell the tale. Until the Omni took him, where limitless possibilities await.
Physical Description: (As the last remnant of his Spartan Village, Atelos is a golden-brown color with dark hair and dark eyes. He is very unclean and has scruff as a normal 17 year old boy would be. Although he is muscular, he has numerous scars from all the beatings he took and has a slight limp in his left leg from a fracture that never set right. 6 foot exactly 185 pounds. His glove is permanently on his hand and his shield on his back. Has an aura, red or blue determining his mood and his fighting style and is purely aesthetic.)
Stats:
ATK:3
DEF:4
SPD:1
TEC:2
Starting Proficiencies: Physical Strength, Area Shield Proficiency
Starting Powers: Survival
Starting Moves:
Spartan Shield
-Atelos can use his shield to block normal attacks as well as bash and batter his opponent. Standard bronze spartan shield with lots of padding and defense with a minor pyromancy enchantment.
Under Fire!(Area Shield Proficiency) 300 OM
-Atelos releases fires from the ends of the shield creating fire to shield the rest of his body. The flames extend past the edges of the shield until Atelos' body is fully covered from the front-side. However, his sides are open to attack. Lack of concentration can break the flames. Flames are blue and passive and defensive in nature.
Spiked Pyromancy Glove 300 OM
-Atelos' non shield hand has a spiked glove with bronze at the knuckles that can be intensified with flames. The flames are limited to his elbow length and no more width than his hands and is solely used for offensive purposes. A brighter red than his shield's flames and more aggressive in nature
I confirm that I have read and agreed to the Rules of Conduct.
Re: Atelos - Atelos - 11-06-2014
Spent OM- 4,300
Remaining- 700
Re: Atelos - Sarah_Kerrigan - 11-06-2014
This form has been moved to the proper joining section.
Re: Atelos - Atelos - 11-08-2014
bump
Re: Atelos - Sarah_Kerrigan - 11-08-2014
Just a couple things:
Under Fire - Is it the shield protecting your entire body from harm, or do the flames surround you to defend from all sides? With Area Shield you can have either as long as they are solely defensive. However, it needs to be clear.
Rage of Sparta - How long is the prep time for this? Is the aura just aesthetic, or does it do something? Finally, how fatigued does this leave him - can he perform this feat multiple times? Also Omni will have to look at it as I am unsure about the price. I can sorta see what you are going for. It's like a 3-step attack, but I'm the wrong person to be asking about complex Moves.
Lastly, you also need to spend 300 OM for a Move to have a 'shield' to use. You have enough OM for it; I calculated 4,600 OM spent not 4,800. And, that's assuming your second Move costs 900 OM.
Re: Atelos - Atelos - 11-09-2014
Fixed. I made the shield move and i fixed the spending cost. I added on how the aura is purely for show and I think i balanced rage of Sparta. Not sure if the charge has been fixed but i think i made the move more balanced.
Re: Atelos - Sarah_Kerrigan - 11-09-2014
Looks all good. I still need Omni to look over Rage of Sparta. After that you'll be approved.
Re: Atelos - Omni - 11-09-2014
Rage of Sparta would be just 300. Just bear in mind that this isn't a video, y'know, people can interrupt him. It does sound like it's probably more super move material but it's up to you whether you want to buy it now is a basic move, or wait and make it a super move once you hit level two.
Re: Atelos - Atelos - 11-09-2014
I think I'll hold off till level 2 to make it a super move. Just took it off! I also added the spiked glove, i think that should be more round off for now
Re: Atelos - Sarah_Kerrigan - 11-09-2014
Assuming that the Pyromancy Glove only can be augmented by flames, it is approved at 300. If at a later time you wanted to augment it with other elements for variability, each additional one would be the price of a standard move: 300 OM.
Anyways, you're approved post this in a new topic in the roster section with an additional reply that at least describes your moves, but preferably becomes an entire character profile. For an example of one check any of the active members' rosters:
Name: Atelos
Level: 1
Spent OM: 4,300
Proficiencies: (1400); Physical Strength (1000), Area Shield (400)
Powers: (2000); Survival (2000)
Moves: (900); Spartan Shield (300), Under Fire! (300), Spiked Pryomancy Glove (300)
Super Moves:
Transformations:
Summons:
Items:
Bases:
Unlocks:
Base stats:
ATK: 3
DEF: 4
SPD: 1
TEC: 2
I'll post up your log page which you may utilize to make purchases at a later time.
Remember your first IC post should be in the Nexus. Please see the introduction page in the Rules for further details. Afterwards, your free to head to any of the other verses that can be reached from the Nexus.